


The Tale of Mira Trevelyan.

by Kitcat



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Cullen is a nervous dork in love and says 'Stop' a lot to his dirty thoughts, Cunnilingus, F/M, Fluff and Humor, Fluff and Smut, Hiding with laughter, Kinda follows the DAI timeline so Alistair comes in later., Light Angst, Make you work for the porn, Mira's sarcasm, Multi, NSFW chapters marked, Past Abuse, Past Sexual Abuse, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, Romance, Rylen's sexy accent, Slow Burn, Smut, Starting Over, mild alcoholism, sexy dreams
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-21
Updated: 2018-04-14
Packaged: 2018-11-03 05:29:56
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 31
Words: 148,709
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10960689
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kitcat/pseuds/Kitcat
Summary: This is the tale of Mira Trevelyan.  A woman who's been running most of her life, and now a woman who's the bloody Herald of Andraste. How does she deal with this? Honestly, through booze, sex and a plastered on smile. And somewhere along the way... by falling in love. Twice.(Relationship tags are in order of appearance in fic and major NSFW chapters are marked.)





	1. I’ll drink you under the Chantry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello,  
> So I feel like I should mention that this fic started little over a year ago, as a simple writing exercise on tragic backstories and just grew and grew. So strap in for horrible pasts, fluffy team building and porn. (Eventually, you gotta work for it!)
> 
> Fair warning for  
> \- Alcohol  
> \- Past Abuse

It was quiet, night had drawn on the wooden walls of Haven. Although most of its inhabitants were asleep, the only ones still awake were the night guard and one very confused woman. Mira Trevelyan, youngest daughter of the Chantry-ass kissing Lord Marcus Trevelyan. Here was an Ex-pirate, rouge who was currently 3 sheets to the wind on cheap Ferelden beer.

Within the space of a week, Mira had been imprisoned for mass murder, thrown at a hole in the sky that was spitting out demons, named the Herald of Andraste and had the immense pleasure of writing a letter to her controlling and frankly abusive father, telling him _Exactly_ what she thought of him and what he could do if he ever wanted to contact her again. And now here she was drunk, again, wandering around the underground passageways of the Haven Chantry, oh what would her mother think. Probably something along the lines of _Respectable young ladies do not drink to such excess, what must they think of our house_. Ah yes, the ever perceivable  They. Now, apparently, she wasn’t just representing her stuck-up family but also now the bloody Maker’s bride!

Mira bubbled with rage, throwing the now empty bottle down the dark hallway with enough force for it to shatter satisfyingly on impact. She grinned smugly as she sank down onto the floor. She didn’t want to be here, she didn’t want this responsibility, she didn’t want any responsibility. She wanted the freedom to fight, drink and parade across the face of Thedas with whomever she pleased.

“Who’s down there?” Echoed this growled voice from the other end of the hall.

Mira groaned, running her hands over her face before replying “It is I, The Queen of Antiva.”

There was a pause, and she hoped that whoever it was had gone away.

“If I find out it’s one of you bloody scouts.” The voice growled again before the distinctive thump of boots started to echo down the hall.  
Mira shifted, the sound, the echo was making her head spin, she was dizzy and not in a fun way. The footsteps were closer now, close enough for Mira to chance a glance up at the interloper raining on her little party. Knight Captain Cullen… or was it Commander Cullen now? Tall, blonde, complete tight arse.

  
“Makers breath, Lady Trevelyan? What are you doing down here? You went to bed hours ago.” Cullen frowned looking down at where Mira had decided to huddle down on the cold stone floor next to an empty barrel.

  
“Oh, you know how it goes, first you’re all ready to go to bed and then you start thinking about Nugs and their little feet…. Those creepy little feet.” Mira slurred slightly as she shivered, pulling her cloak around her more tightly, whatever happened to her nightgown that had sleeves? Oh yeah, boom, exploded.

  
“Nugs? And their feet? Have you been drinking?” Cullen questioned looking confused as he came to crouch in front of her before he was distracted by a voice at the end of the hall.

“Everything alright Commander? Do you wish me to go back to my rounds?” _Ah he was talking to one of the night guards before he heard the noise._

“Yes, everything’s fine. Head back to your rounds and close the door on your way up. That will be all.” Cullen ordered, raising his voice for it to carry which made Mira squirm from the loud echo it made. Mira frowned at him for making such noise.

“You’re very loud.” Mira frowned as she moved to poke his chest.

“Yes, and you’re very drunk, what are you doing down here?” Cullen asked as he ignored the prodding finger at his chest.

“Beds too soft, too many people at the Tavern, better booze here.” Mira muttered, hoping that one of those excuses was enough to send the man on his way.

“Beds to… What in the name of Andraste? This is no place for you to be sitting, come on.” Cullen sighed as he stood, extending his hand as if to help her up.

 

Mira growled at the idea. “No.”

 

“No? Don’t be stubborn, come on.” He repeated, this time moving to grab her arm. The moment he brushed her skin she instantly retreated at his movement, eye’s showing an anger he could never have predicted coming from so small a woman.

“Don’t you dare. Look, Herald says piss off shouldn’t you go run off and pray to your Maker for forgiveness.” She spat, head now throwing a miniature revolt at the harshness of her movements. She was so caught up in her own pain that she almost missed the flash of anger that came across the Commanders honeyed eyes.

“Lady Trevelyan I must insist that you come with me.” Cullen managed to grit out through his clenched teeth. This was the point where Mira should have listened, should have backed down. She didn’t know this man and she was already far more familiar with the tempers of men than she liked. But like the stubborn mule she was she raised her defiant head.

“Or what? You gonna beat me? I’m sure there’s a spot where my father’s men missed!” she hissed as she moved to stand, if she was going to fight him she need to stand but her legs weren’t cooperating. She managed to stand, legs wobbling like a new born Halla.

“What do you mean _Where your father’s men missed?_ What did your father’s men do?!” Cullen pressed, the anger now redirected and worry was creeping along his expression. And for some unexplainable reason that was the moment Mira was suddenly griped by laughter. She fell forward from the force of her laughter landing on Cullen’s chest who while being shocked at her action barely had the thought to catch her.

“Oh Commander, what didn’t they do…... I miss Rivain.” Mira sighed, jumping conversation as her ‘drink addled’ mind flipped again, leaning against the Commander for support.

“You miss Rivain?” Cullen gawked, now more confused than ever.

“Oh yes! The warmth, the wine, none of that piss.” Mira smiled, gesturing wildly to the broken glass on the floor. “Don’t even know what that shit was, tasted like dog piss.”

“Well this is Ferelden, come on let’s get you by a fire you’re shivering.” Cullen suggested, lowering his voice as if he was calming a startled horse. Mira looked up at him, cheek now plastered to his cold breastplate, did he ever take this armour off? She sighed weighing her options, she’d run out of booze and she was rather cold so she nodded and allowed the Commander to shuffle her out of the dark and dingy hallway.

 

As she was being ushered upstairs she turned to look at the Commander, the torchlight was catching his face in a rather attractive way that was before it turned a nasty green.

“Ah, fuck.” Mira gasped as the pain shot up her arm and she turned to cradle it.

“My lady?” Cullen questioned, the concerned look back in his eyes.

“It’s nothing. Just the mark.” She gritted out, still clutching the flaring hand close to her chest. Cullen frowned again, clearly not convinced.

“Let’s get you to bed my Lady.”

“Well, Commander. I normally like to be taken to dinner first but for you I’ll make an exception.” Mira chuckled as she was ushered through the doors of someone’s bedroom, she was too drunk to tell whose it was.

“I uh, that’s not what I- Just go to sleep Herald.” Cullen stuttered as he peeled back the covers of the bed and sat her down.

“Mm yes, I’m sure those swooning Chantry girls will have something to say about you in my bed.” Mira chuckled as she kicked off her slippers and flopped down. The angle was awkward but the bed was comfortable, not so sickeningly soft anymore.

“Get some sleep Lady Trevelyan.” Cullen sighed as he covered her in blankets and placed a bucket next to the bed along with a glass of water on the nightstand.

“Cullen?” Mira whispered as she was him turn to leave.

“Yes?” he paused turning back to look at her.

“Thank you.” She muttered on the edge of sleep. He left her quietly but only when he was sure she was fast asleep. He was worried about her behaviour, was it the pressure of being labelled _Herald of Andraste_ or what she said about her father? Cullen decided to make a mental note of asking Sister Nightingale about what she knew, that woman knew everything.

Cullen looked up as he stood outside the Chantry, Dawn wasn’t too far off and there was no harm in waking the troops early to start training today and besides the quicker they went through training the more time they could have this evening, something some of the men would greatly appreciate although they would no doubt grumble at being woken early.  
***

 

It was late in the day when Mira finally awoke, her head was swimming in a pool of needles and her mouth tasted like dirt. That was the last time she was drinking Dwarven ale! She tried to get out of bed, wait. This wasn’t her bed! This wasn’t even her quarters! Where the hell did she end up?! Her stomach flipped as the remaining alcohol made itself very well known. She groaned pitifully as she cradled both her stomach and head in her arms.

Mira struggled around, trying her best to sit up to figure out where she was and what she did. She noticed the mug of water and bucket next to the bed and greedily drank the water before she made her way from the bed. Her clothes were still on which was something and she found her shoes placed neatly beside the bed, not tossed across the room which was known to do in a bout of passion, so that was something else. She tugged her cloak tighter around her as she took her stolen mug of water and started to make her way out of the room.

There was a guard sitting in a chair close to the door, obviously waiting for her. He had the look of a Templar about him, even if he was without the armour.

“Lady Herald, Commander Cullen asked me to keep an eye on you today. Said something about you not feeling well.” The guard bowed slightly as he came to stand in front of her.

“So, that’s the Commander’s quarters then?”

“Yes, my Lady, though he rarely uses them.”

“Free bit of advice guardsman, if the dwarf recommends an ale. Don’t listen to him, he is a bad man.” Mira frowned, the strain on her face only made her head throb more.

“I’ll keep that in mind My Lady and its Rylen.” The man chuckled, quickly catching on as to what ails the Herald.

“Mira, fuck the nobility part.” She growled, she had just about had enough of people treating her differently for a name she didn’t want.

“As you say Mira.” Rylen chuckled as he began to shuffle her off to get her fed.

 

 

They had barely only taken a few steps out of the small cabin before they were intercepted by a panicked messenger.

 

“My Lady Herald! A man arrived this morning, he bares house Trevelyan’s heraldry, he says he is here representing Lord Marcus Trevelyan who is approaching camp and should be arriving within the hour.” The messenger rattled out quickly.

“What! Where is this messenger now?” Mira growled, her Father? Here in Haven? This day just kept getting worse and worse!

“He is in the Chantry, Ambassador Montilyet is seeing to him now, she sent me to collect you.” The messenger replied, gesturing with his hands to head towards the Chantry.

“I’ll be there in a moment, I just need to see to something first quickly and then I’ll come.” Mira nodded, sending the messenger off with a quick but hesitant smile.

 

“Mira? You alright? You look like you’re going to snap.” Rylen warned. Mira took a deep breath, her head was pounding from her hangover, her blood was boiling in anger… her Father… her Father was coming here.

“Rylen, I need you to get Commander Cullen. Tell him this is an emergency, this man coming here is dangerous and will potentially attack if provoked. I need the soldiers on alert and the Commander with me when I address them. Can you do this for me?” she asked, well pleaded really, she was running out of options. Her Father would surely try to drag her back to Ostwick but she had time, she could prepare, she could plan her defence!

“On your order.” Rylen nodded seriously before jogging off to warn the Commander.  
Mira darted over to her own cabin and dressed appropriately. The armour that Harritt made only a few days prior and strapped her borrowed blades to her back before making her way to the Chantry.

If she could warn the Inquisition before he arrived, they could help her… they could stop him from taking her back. Mira hurried up the path, hoping that Cullen was on his way with his soldiers that she’d have enough time to explain herself… she hadn’t exactly been forthcoming to the Inquisition when she’d agreed to help.

Her heart sank right into her shoes when she saw the soldiers standing outside the Chantry… Trevelyan men… her father’s men. Former Templars and Mercs… her jailers in a matter of speaking. Their presence could mean only one thing, that her father was already inside.

She steeled herself, the people of Haven believed her to be the Herald of fucking Andraste they wouldn’t let him take her without a fight if it came to it. She held her head high as she walked by her father’s men, she had survived their abuses, survived the fade, she would not allow them to take her this time. A few of them sneered as she passed but none of them made their usual vulgar comments… not whilst they were under the eyes of the Inquisition.

 

She pushed through the doors of the Chantry only to catch a glimpse of Josephine’s gold ruffles as her office door closed behind her. Leliana was in the hallway, she looked concerned and quickly intercepted Mira herding her into a secluded corner.

“You look like you’re going to kill someone.” She whispered, watching Mira with a hint of worry in her eyes. Mira only frowned back, her hand tightening on a hidden blade in her sleeve.

“I fear it may come to that. You’re the Spymaster, how much do you know… about me?” Mira asked cautiously. What her father did was hard enough to think about on a good day and today was definitely not a good day.

“I may not know everything but I know enough to see that you do not want to return home with your father. We will not force you to go, frankly we need you Herald but if I may, can I ask why?” Leliana spoke quietly, her voice soothing as she asked her question.

“That monster is not my Father, all he wants is my name and my belly to trade for his own power. I refused to play his stupid game and ran away when I was young. He hunted me across Thedas, his men murder people to get to me… they … I can’t.” she gasped. She was angry, furious even that the bastard who cause so much hurt was only a few feet away.

“I understand, you told Cullen to bring soldiers correct? How do you plan on handling this?”

“I planned on walking in there, inform him I was staying and hopefully leave him with crushed balls and headache. He may be a monster but that doesn’t mean that I have to be.” Mira growled with finality.  
Leliana nodded and walked with her to the meeting room. They were both determined to get through this with as little violence as possible but were also prepared to act if necessary.

 

The two women entered Josephine’s study with a strength in their step that came from the unity, they were of one mind. They would not let him take her.

“Ambassador Montilyet, your hospitality is commendable but I am here for my daughter, you _will _ bring her before me.” Lord Marcus Trevelyan… her father was standing there barking out orders as per usual. A tall man with greying dark hair and a thin moustache.

“Of course, my Lord, as it happens she has just arrived.” Josephine curtsied slightly before gesturing to the two women who’d just entered the room.

Lord Trevelyan spun around quickly, he saw the woman who had entered alongside his daughter and proceeded to exclaim like an overjoyed parent might.

“Mira, my sweet child I’m so glad you’ve survived. Your mother will be overjoyed!” he spoke with an air of forced empathy as he came forwards to embrace her.

The moment his arms came around her shoulders, Mira froze his voice whispered in her ear “ _You are coming home little girl._ ” This promise wasn’t a reassuring one… this was a threat.

“Ladies may I have a moment alone with my daughter? There are many things we must discus about the family.” Lord Trevelyan asked politely, _he was always polite when in the presence of others._

Both Josephine and Leliana waited for Mira to nod in acceptance before they left the room. The two advisors were met outside the office by a slightly out of breath Cullen who looked on in suspiciously.

“What in the _void_ is going on? I was told there was an emergency!” he hissed just loud enough for the two women to hear.

“There is, the Herald didn’t have much time to explain she claims her father is a monster who only wants her for her name and womb, she also claims that he’s murdered people to manipulate her and from how that man was lying through his teeth I’m inclined to believe her. We cannot let him take her, not just for our cause but for her own safety as well.” Leliana explained seriously, keeping that low whispering register.

Josephine looked horrified whilst Cullen only steeled himself, taking a deep breath through his nose.

“She mentioned her father’s men beat her last night. She was drunk and I don’t think she meant to but you remember when Solas reported that there was already bruising on her from before she went into the fade. I believe _he’s_ responsible and now you’ve just left her alone with him!” Cullen growled lowly as he turned sharply and began to march towards the small office room.

**

“Perhaps we should talk for a moment father?” Mira offered, pulling on a sweet voice only courtesans and liars used.

“We have nothing to talk about whore. You _will_ give up this farce, return home and you _will_ be wed to whomever I deem necessary. Is that clear?” Lord Trevelyan hissed, all formality and air of kindness dropped faster than a squealing nug.

“Ah, now you see we’re going to have a bit of a problem with that.” Mira began slowly, there was a hint of humour in her voice, like she was amused by his orders.

  
The crack of his palm could be heard through the door, “Listen here you little bitch, I did not spend all that coin retrieving you from your whoring and bringing you home to do your duty only to lose my investment to this piss poor heretical Inquisition.” He spat, literally, in her face.  
The door opened before Mira could even think of stopping her reaction.

 

She swung fast, the door serving to distract her father as she reacted, her fist meeting his temple in a blind rage.

 

Shock spread throughout the room as Mira proceeded to land a series of well-aimed punches into the older man. She was reaching for her blades as she hovered over his prone hunched over body, “You do not own me; I am not your whore for you to barter with. I am Mira Trevelyan, Lioness of Llomerryn and you will never again touch me, if you even dream of killing anyone close to me again. I will find you father and I _will _ kill you.” She threatened viciously.

 

Lord Trevelyan was hunched over, his nose clearly broken and his eye already bruising.

  
“You would let this bitch lead you?” he snarled looking around the room at those who’d just entered, “Are you a man of honour or have these women taken your pride as well as your balls?” Lord Trevelyan finished, looking to gain some sympathy from the only other man in the room.

 

“Herald,” Cullen addressed, ignoring the other man, “Would you have me escort Lord Trevelyan off the premises or would you rather I imprison him for the offence he has clearly caused.” Cullen snarled, bowing low to show his respect for Mira, not only to her but to her father as well.

  
Mira just stared at him, clearly surprised by his offer and was considering it carefully. Lord Trevelyan could sense his time here was running out as he glanced between the two.

 

“You would really take her orders? This _whore_? You believe her to be your Herald?”

 

“I do, she has proven herself where all other failed and you have made yourself an enemy of the Inquisition. Your life is in her hands should she wish it.” Cullen confirmed, his hand resting on his pommel threateningly as he came to stand by Mira.

“I do not wish to see this man again for as long as I live.” Mira decided finally, _she wasn’t a monster like_ _him_ … _she wasn’t no matter how much she may want to be._

 

“On your order, Herald.” Cullen nodded firmly before glancing at both Leliana and Josephine for their vote of confidence. Josephine darted over to Mira quickly as Cullen grabbed Lord Trevelyan by the collar and proceeded to throw him through the door roughly.

Leliana closed the door as soon at the two men were through to give them privacy and respect Mira’s wishes to never look at that man again. Josie quickly grabbed a cloth to clean the spit from Mira’s face.

“Josie, I’m fine. Really.” She protested weakly, she felt like her legs were going to out from underneath her, her heart was racing. She did it. She stayed free, she’d threatened Lord Trevelyan with enough power and weight behind her to make him stop.

“You’re not fine, you’re shaking. Come sit down.” Leliana insisted before turning to Josie and asking her to grab a glass of water.

 

Mira accepted the water gratefully and even appreciated their support. Josie was looking at her face gently, “That shouldn’t bruise, but just to be safe I’ll ask one of the runners to put an ointment in your cabin.”

“I’ll have my people watch him, if he even steps a foot out of line we will act. You will never have to deal with him again.” Leliana promised… this was all too familiar to her, Audrey Amell had been the one to help her escape the clutches of a loved one who betrayed her, maybe she could help Mira in a similar manner.

  
Heavy footsteps pounded close to the door before it opened, revealing the Commander with yet another serious expression plastered to his face.

“Could someone please explain what happened?” he asked firmly. Mira sighed softly before glancing between the other two females. They needed to know… deserved to after what just happened.

“You might want to sit down, it’s a bit of a tale.” Mira sighed, pausing to take another sip of her drink whilst both Cullen and Leliana sat. Josephine gestured politely for her to begin.

 

 

“When I was 14 my Father made a deal to marry me off to a considerably older man. I was young, barely a woman and had a seriously stubborn dislike to both authority and the idea of marriage and so I rejected my father’s idea. He threatened to disown me, I agreed that he should, I never wanted to be nobility, I wanted adventure and excitement much like I had read in all the tales… my Father caught me trying to escape the first time, he had his guards beat me and then imprisoned me in my rooms as he called both for my husband to be and a priest.

He was going to marry me off against my will to a man who was even older than he was?” she paused trying to calm the snarl rising on her face.

“Luckily though, one of the maids took pity and helped smuggle me out of the estate. She helped me find passage on a ship bound for Rivain, it was then I met Isabella, a pirate captain who let me join her crew and trained me how to fight… amongst other things when I grew older.” She paused with a slight smile at the memory.

Cullen was just rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly… if it was the same Isabella he was thinking of he could make a good guess as to what they got up to.

 

“I thought I was free but the minute I began to make a name for myself, my father sent men after me. I was forced to flee, every, single time they came. These were no mere hired hands, the man I was meant to marry was the Knight-Commander of Ostwick, our joining would have brought my father considerable influence within the Chantry and so he convinced the Knight-Commander to send his best Hunters after me… I had to run for 8 years, just barely escaping their traps.”

She paused for a moment, steeling herself for the next part of her tale. She glanced up at the others, they were all so quiet, just listening to her talk.

“For a time, I thought I’d finally evaded them, I met someone, settled down, got married. Started a quiet life… but, they found me. Killed my husband, dragged me back to Ostwick where they beat and drugged me into submission. That’s why I was at the conclave, my father sent me to be an example on the dangers of blood magic, that was the story he told everyone after I left, that a blood mage made me do it.” Mira hissed venomously, her face scrunching up into a snarl, Leliana couldn’t decide if she angry about her father’s lie or who he lied about.

 

“I have been forced into my father’s plans under duress for the past 2 years. Your Inquisition has given me the chance to escape that and for that I’m grateful, I’m a decent fighter, since you’ve helped me… I want to help you; more than what I’m doing around camp. You’ve got rifts that need closing? Let me assemble a team and take them out.” Mira offered seriously. Although Cassandra had technically recruited her, she’d yet to be of any real use apart from helping in the healers’ cabin and doing some minor hunting around camp.

 

“Hold on, you said it yourself. You’ve been captive to two years, even the best warrior’s skill diminishes over time. I would like to see you in Training with some of our recruits before we send you out.” Cullen suggested, filing the information she’d given them away to contemplate later. _8 years… maker’s breath._

“I Agree, even the best formed team can fail if they haven’t trained with each other, learnt everyone’s different fighting techniques.” Leliana added seriously.  
Mira nodded in agreement, “Alright, tomorrow morning I’ll gather a team and we’ll meet you with the recruits.”

With that the meeting seemed to be over, but just on her way out the door Mira felt someone catch her hand gently and guide her back. The Ambassador was looking at her with a soft expression.

“Mira, Herald. If you ever need anything… or just someone to talk to. I’m always here, we’re all here if you need us.” She spoke, soft and caring. A kindness that Mira had no cause to experience of late.

She faltered slightly, not quite knowing how to respond, “Thank you Josie… it’s certainly been hard but I think, maybe things are looking up?” Mira responded uncertainly, trying to put on a small smile but her cheek still hurt from her father’s hand.

“We can only hope.”

  
**

 

Mira sat in the tavern nursing both a large ale and idly smoking a small pipe, A gift from Adan, along with a mixture of leaves which were helping to alleviate the cravings for whatever drugs her captors kept her topped up with before. According to Adan, she should be right as rain in a few weeks thanks to most of the addiction being burned out of her system when she received her mark, there was still risk to her health but between the addiction and her mark, well it’s all part and parcel now.

 

Her mark… Mira glanced down at the green slash across her palm, sometimes it almost looked like you could stick your whole finger through it! She’d tested that theory numerous times after she’d closed the rift with no luck, but once more couldn’t hurt.

 

“Can I buy you a drink Herald?” Came the sudden offer. Distracted Mira glanced up from her hand, her pipe still balanced in her mouth, to see Varric standing just in front of her table, the other patrons seemed to be keeping a respectful distance… not that Mira minded really, honestly, she was a little frightened by all the reverence and attention she’d gotten over the past 2 weeks.

“I’m still good with this one, but I wouldn’t say no to some company.” She smiled softly, taking her pipe and extinguishing it with the tamper.

Varric pulled up a chair and got comfortable, eventually a deck of cards came out and they started a game of diamond back. Mira smirked when she figured out one of Varric’s tells… or what she thought was one… she lost that hand in the end.

“So Herald, how it going?” he asked conversationally.

“Much better than this morning. Started off with a hangover, punched my father in the face and got the Commander to throw him out of town. I’m finally free and what do I do? Join an Inquisition!” she laughed reaching for her drink again.

“Damn, that sounds… pretty shit actually, how are you handling everything?”

“Varric, this is my 5th pint and I’m still not drunk enough to even begin thinking about handling this! Ah if only Isabella were here, she’d have something that would really knock me on my arse.”

“Isabella? Rivani pirate who never wears pants? Who has slept with nearly everyone this side of Thedas?” Varric exclaimed laying his cards out on the table. _Shit, he’d won again!_

“Yeah? Wait you know her?” she asked, interest piqued as she shuffled the deck again.

“Know her, kid, she and I have been friends for the past ten years! She’s been in Kirkwall with me, Hawke and the others.” He explained gleefully, happy to have a common person they both knew.

“When I ran away from home, she was the captain who helped me get to Rivain! I became one of her crew for a few years! She taught me how to fight! She taught me how to live!” Mira explained, her happiness was almost tangible, rolling off her in waves.

“Ha, I’ll mention you in my next letter. She’s calling herself an Admiral now, I think it means she’s just got a really big hat.” Varric chuckled, looking at his cards absently as they continued to play.

 

Varric was a good man, kind hearted and clever. He could see Mira having a tough time of it, how lost and possibly afraid she was. She was like a cat, puffing herself up real big to everyone, hiding under layers of humour and bravado to stop people from asking questions… if he hadn’t heard what’d happened to her straight from the Nightingale he wouldn’t have believed what she’d been through.

 

By all rights Mira should be being cared for in an institution, preferably by kind old ladies… or in Mira’s case handsome young men if she was any friend of Isabella’s! Not being thrown into saving the world.

Varric sighed quietly as he looked at his cards, this world was no good to heroes… especially the unwilling kind.

 

“What you got there Varric?” Mira asked over her own hand, one dark copper eyebrow raised in curiosity.

“A terrible hand.” He smirked folding his cards. Mira just smirked at him and revealed even shittier cards.

“Well. It’s been good playing Varric. Say the Commander’s suggested I do a bit of training before I head into the field, you wouldn’t be up for giving me a few pointers tomorrow?” Mira asked slowly, she fully expected him to say no and was pleasantly surprised when he smiled.

“For you Tiger, of course.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been sitting on this fic for aaaaagges and i've finally decided to post this as motivation to stop bloody editing and re-editing and editing again and finally finish this!  
> So leave us a Kudos or a Comment if you like!


	2. Running

 

Chapter 2 – W/4903 Running.

 

**

Mira started the morning early, Varric standing by her cabin with his crossbow at the ready while Solas smiled disarmingly as he offered to join them. Predictably Cassandra was already down waiting at training grounds waiting for them to start them all off with a lap around Haven as a warm up before they would start to train.

Mira tightened her boots before they started, tying up her hair as best she could and placing her large cloak over the rail before she set off in a light sprint after Cassandra. Both Varric and Solas leaning behind with their light jog.

It was almost freeing to run like this, something to chase, something fun to do after so long of being trapped. She’d almost caught up with the seeker, feeling the burn in her lungs from the exertion, her body forced her to slow down, catch her breath as her stamina weakened.

Cassandra turned slightly, shouting words of encouragement to the Herald as she continued to peel off ahead. Mira could feel her legs already start to wobble but she could do this.

One foot in front of the other and keep going.

There was a soft pat on her back, a nudge forwards from Varric as Solas let loose a little healing energy and the three of them set off again.

Eventually they made it back to camp, Cassandra was already doing her push ups… one handed push ups, _dear maker who made this woman!_

“Perhaps it would be wise to do some stretches Herald before we move into some practice fights?” Solas recommend as Varric passed her a skin of water.

Mira nodded in reply, being far more interested in getting as much of this water down her throat as possible.

Solas lead them through a series of easy yet satisfying stretches, all the while talking about how this would promote blood flow and allow the muscles to work at peak capacity.

Mostly she was just trying not to laugh at Varric’s mocking monologue as he followed along, stretching his shorter limbs and complaining bitterly.

Once they’d finished those, Mira was handed a pair of dulled training daggers from a fellow recruit who quickly pointed back to his superior, Rylen who threw Mira a cheerful thumb up before moving off to train his own group of recruits.

 

“Alright, let’s start with the basics. Everyone spread out and show me some lunges.” Cassandra barked, standing in front of the group as she assumed training command.

Mira lunged twice, daggers flying in her grasp. Most of it was pure muscle memory, years and years of fighting to survive.

“Not bad. Solas be careful with your hands, it might help to bring them closer together for more control over your stave. Varric footing and Herald, keep your elbows in, you’re losing power in your blows when you don’t lock your elbows.” Cassandra instructed before pairing everybody off to practice. Solas and Varric with ranged tactics while she took Mira off to work on fighting warrior opponents.

 

Cassandra was ruthless, coming at Mira with most of her strength, forcing her to work on her endurance and dodging manoeuvres. The pair stopped after about 15 minutes as Cassandra ordered a change. Solas against Mira, she wanted to see how the Herald would fair against a mage opponent instead of a warrior.

 

Solas smiled in greeting as he let loose a small rejuvenation spell to help Mira get her strength back, she smiled back in thanks before they began. Solas worked mainly with ice spells, trying to slow Mira down. Mira smirked at the choice and swiftly darted around the spells coming into close quarter with the mage. Solas was on the back foot here, he expected her to switch to ranged tactics, not come in close and dance around him.

And she was dancing, her footwork was light and fast, staying close enough for him to be unable to lay any area spells or do much of anything bar block her blades as they aimed for the vital areas on his body.

Eventually Solas was forced to back-off and admit defeat, Mira was relentless. There was something in her eyes, this bright sparkling joy. Cassandra called for break moving the entire group over to small seating area next to the armoury to rest and rehydrate.

 

“That’s some amazing footwork Herald. Might I ask, are you accustomed to fighting mages by-chance?” Solas asked off hand as the group discussed strategies they could use when they eventually were eventually sent out into the field.

“Ah, Yes actually. My husband and I used to spar to keep my skills up. I feel much more in tune with fighting against a mage, not so much against a seeker though… or Templars. I mean I’ve fought mercenaries and bandits but that was a long time ago, it’s something I must work on.” Mira admitted.

“You are quick,” Cassandra interjected, “But your stamina is something we must improve on, you use a lot of energy and there were a few times when you left yourself open when we sparred. With your permission, I would like to set a training schedule for you when we’re in camp.”

“That would be welcome Cassandra. Thank you all for agreeing to come down and try to whip my ass into shape but if you don’t mind, I saw some of the recruits practicing earlier. I’m going to ogle.” Mira smirked, getting up with a groan as she trotted off.

 

Mira walked tall until she was out of view, heading through the gates and straight to her cabin. The moment she was safely hidden by that wooden door, Mira let out this long low groan as she shuffled over to her bed and quickly collapsed into it, aiming to having a quick power nap before she headed to another meeting or some other matter later in the afternoon.

The moment her head hit the pillow, Mira was out like a light. All the running and fighting and chaos over the past few days left her drained, that as well as finally being free of her father…

 

The dream started out like any other. There she was, running like usual. She could be sure if she was chasing something or trying to be free of something, the only thing she was sure of was the ground beneath her feet, the steady burn in her muscles and the direction she’d chosen to run. The path below her grew darker, colder and the rising musty smell of damp stone filled her nose.

A force from her dream tugged at her wrists, jolting her to her knees as the mark on her hand flared brightly, illuminating the cells underneath the Haven chantry.

“You are marked Herald.” Came Cassandra’s threatening tone. Her voice floated through the room but she couldn’t find her, something wasn’t quite right… she sounded… off.

“Sent by Andraste to be our salvation.” Chimed in Leliana. Her figure didn’t so much as step into her eye line but instead appear to form out of the dark and dank surrounding her cell.

“I don’t believe I was chosen.” She bit out in aggravation. No that wasn’t right, she wasn’t angry at them, no she feared them. Josephine had materialized as well as Cassandra but there was the one figure, standing just beyond her view… lurking… waiting.

“You are the Herald of Andraste, you will deliver us from our terrors.” Cassandra barked forcefully. The three women were circling now, like vultures waiting to pluck over her corpse.

“I said I would help but not as your fucking Herald! I don’t even know what this thing truly is! What if it kills me!”

“Then we will drag your corpse to the rifts and close them ourselves.” Growled the voice in the shadows.

Mira heard the clink of armour before she saw him. Brightly polished steel, the flaming red sword stamped onto his breast. Knight Captain Cullen.

He stalked close to her and as he approached she could feel the room become heavier, the dank being drawn in with him. He held up his hand, grasping a syringe filled with a familiar drug inside.  The fear grew, it was the same drug the Templars used to keep her docile and weak.

His hand snapped out to grab her by the back of the neck, hair catching and ripping in-between the joints of his gauntlets as he yanked her head to the side and exposed her neck.

“Luckily, there are ways to make you pliant, complicit even, maybe we could make you tranquil or something like it, then you’d never think of objecting.” Cullen mused as he ran his thumb over her skin, seeking the best spot to plunge the needle in.

“Fuck you! Get off me! Get-” she screamed angrily, tugging away trying to struggle out of his grasp.

“Don’t make it worse Herald.” He hissed, smacking her head against the armoured skirt he wore before lining up the syringe.

“No. no please, please don’t.” now she reduced to quiet begging, “I don’t want to, I don’t want to lose myself again.”

“Shhh, I’ll make it all better Herald, just relax.” He soothed, pushing the needle into her skin.

 

 

She awoke with a start, the imagined pain of the needle sliding into her skin made her practically bolt from bed.

The sudden movement along with her shortness of breath and the rush of sitting up made her stomach turn, she quickly huddled over to the chamber pot and emptied what little food she’d eaten that day.

“blech.” Mira spat into the bowl before shuffling backwards towards the pitcher of water by her bed, hoping to wash away the foul taste in her mouth.

Maker what a dream. But some of it was true wasn’t it, here she was being forced into doing something through what… obligation from a marked hand?

 

“Always getting into trouble Mira.” She muttered to herself, taking another drink.

She felt like shit. Tired, achy, nauseous, and stuffy. Maybe she could get some food and get an early night… or would that seem like a luxury? Maker, since when did sleep seem like a luxury. Trapped with her father’s guards all she did was sleep to pass the time!

Her stomach rolled again at the thought of food… maybe just sleep then?

Slowly she crawled back into bed, ignoring the sounds of Haven still busy outside.

 

 

*Bang Bang Bang*

 

“Herald? Are you in there?” came the intruding voice.

Mira groaned pitifully as she forced herself up from the bed.

“Yes.”

“The Commander wishes to speak to you at your earliest convenience ma’am.” The messenger informed through the door.

Mira sighed, she was exhausted, sick, all she wanted to do was have a nap and then possibly a bath, not go talk to Commander _stick in the mud._

“Alright, tell him I’ll be there soon.” She replied, swinging her legs off the bed.

“On your order, Herald.”

 

Reluctantly Mira readied herself to face the Commander. She was hesitant around him to be sure, after a nightmare like that anyone would be... He was handsome sure but he was also a Templar, a Templar Knight-Captain at that…

Rationally thinking he probably wants to talk about how badly she performed during training this morning. Maker she didn’t think she was this much out of practice when she offered up her insane idea to the Advisors.

Slowly she made her way back down to the war camp outside the gates and to the Commanders tent. It was getting to be rather late in the afternoon as the sun began it’s decent over the mountains surrounding Haven. 

 

“Commander?” she called, announcing herself before she barged in.

“Enter.” Came the simple reply. Simple and harsh really.

Mira ducked into the tent and was surprised to see the man sat at his desk surrounded by papers. For some reason, she thought he never sat down.

 

“Ah Herald there you are.” Cullen began, putting down his quill to stand and greet her.

“You wanted to speak to me?” she asked, getting straight to the point.

Cullen seemed unnerved by her sharpness, he’d seen her speak to other people and he’d gleaned enough to know that she was usually a lot friendlier… maybe she didn’t like him?

“I… uh yes.  I’m sorry to bother you, I just wanted to find out how you were doing after training with Cassandra. Don’t tell her I told you, but I hear she can be a bit intimidating in the ring.” He joked trying to break the ice.

 

Mira paused, recognising his attempt at awkward humour. What was he getting at?

 

“I admit it’s been a while since I trained, I think I had my ass handed to me by Cassandra.”

“Nonsense, Lady Cassandra had nothing but praise for you when she came by earlier.” Cullen objected taking a few steps closer to her. Mira was again surprised by his manner.

“She did have one suggestion though,” he continued, breaking off his speech to rub at the back of his neck awkwardly.

“Oh? Am I to sit back at camp and let them do all the fighting then?” Mira spoke, although in a joking manner the accusation came off as rather sharp.

 

Cullen stalled, clearly not expecting her tone or ideas.

 

“What? No, Maker no. She only suggested that I be the one to spar with you! She suggested and I agree that I will be the type of target you are more likely to face in the field, so instead of training you to fight against a Seeker you should be training against an ex-Templar.” He explained rather nervously.

“Honestly she had nothing but good things to say about your training. She mentioned we should work on your stamina but also that you were very fast on the field and needed no extra training against mage opponents.” He continued the same rambling pace while Mira just watched on in surprise.

“Oh.” She said rather dimly. Her surprise had spread out onto her face, rising in a hot flush of embarrassment that nearly matched Cullen’s.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to put you on the spot… it’s just… are you comfortable training me? You know you don’t have to, I’m sure you’re too busy.” She rambled, maker she wasn’t normally this bad at talking to people!

 

No, she wasn’t and what the hell was that ringing sound?

 

“I’m not too bu-… Herald are you alright? You look pale.” Cullen noted slowly as Mira struggled to listen. Maker her head was getting dizzy.

“Fine, fine. Continue. Wha-What where you s-s-saying?” she started to slur, growing wobbly on her own legs as she stared the Commander down, determined not to appear weak in front of him.

“Herald? Miss Trevelyan, I think you should sit down.” Cullen suggested, he was watching her, recognising the signs. Loss of colour to the skin, dizziness… she was about to faint and he knew it.

“Don’t call me Trevelyan.” She snarled with as much venom as she could, which wasn’t much considering. Cullen quickly darted forwards just as she dropped, collapsing where she stood as she was on the brink of passing out.

He caught her by the shoulder, using his chest to prop her up and control her decent. She placed her forehead against his cool armour, groaning as she rubbed her aching headache against the cold metal.

 

“Herald? What’s wrong, what do you need?” Cullen asked quickly and calmly, he had to remain calm, the Herald of Andraste just collapsed into his arms like some 5-copper fairy tale.

“Stupid urgh. Adan, I need to see Adan.” She told him through a low groan, she tried to steady her breathing against him, that when she felt his arms tighten as he stood up with her swept up into his arms with the intent to take her to the heals cabin.

“I’m not an invalid Commander. I can-I can...” she paused muttering a shallow _fuck_ under her breath as the shaking started.

“I know you’re not, you proved that this morning but I’m taking you to Adan.” He told her firmly but gently as he walked quickly through the camp, ignoring stares from his recruits.

“Do you know what’s wrong?” he pressed as they walked into Haven.

“I think it’s withdrawals? F-rom what the Templars gave me.” She told him through the shakes. And come they did, the withdrawals came on suddenly and viciously, head pounding, body shaking and jittering and she was so hot she felt nauseous.

 

Cullen just hurried, feeling that she’d struggle to answer any more questions. He came into Adans cabin in a flurry, startling their head healer with his manner.

 

Adan turned with a start to examine his patient.

“Shit, that was faster than I expected. Put her on the bed and stay close by, all my aids are down in the camp doing field training! Of all the bloody times!” the healer griped as he set aside some bottles and prepared herbs.

Cullen quickly lay Mira down on the bed, adjusting the pillow under her head so that she was somewhat comfortable.

 

“It’s hot.” Mira complained as she started to tug at her coat, fingers fumbling on the ties as she tried to take it off.

“Herald I don’t think that’s a good idea.” Cullen spoke softly, taking her hands in his to guide them away from her fumbling.

“No, no. If she’s hot, help her with it, would you?” Adan turned back slightly to insist.

Cullen started at him like he’d grown another head! He wanted him to undress the Herald! The Herald of Andraste!

 

He looked back down at the woman nervously, palms sweating as she writhed on the bed. She was beautiful, nobody would ever deny that. Striking red hair, lightly freckled cheekbones and these piercing stormy blue eyes which captivated him far beyond what was reasonable. 

And she absolutely hated him apparently.

 

“Herald, Adan needs me to take off your jacket.” Cullen forced out, the blush that was on his face seemed to be worse than normal, maybe all the colour that drained from her had found it’s way to him somehow?

“Stop calling me that.” She growled, arching her back as she tried to tug the jacket loose.

“what?” he spluttered, guiding her back onto the bed as his hands shakily undid the ties around her waist.

“I don’t want to be your Herald,” she sighed as if it were obvious, “I just want to be me.”

 

With the ties undone, Mira started squirming again, trying to get rid of the thick coat and at the same time the rest of her clothes. She was burning! But hey, at least the shaking had lessened.

“Heral- My lady-“ Cullen started unsurely before he was cut off.

“Mira, my names Mira.”

It was at this point that Adan had turned back with his prepared ingredients, a vial filled with Maker knows what and a balm that reeked of overpowering elfroot and spindleweed.

“Maker’s blood what are you two doing, I said help her. This balm needs to be massaged into her neck and shoulders to help counteract the migraine that’s building.” Adan griped with an annoyed sigh.

Without any hesitation, Mira sat up slowly and started to pull at the ties of her shirt, loosening it enough so someone could get their hands down the back of her top. Cullen gave an embarrassing squawk of surprise as she leaned forwards in exhaustion, allowing the loose fabric to display her rather voluptuous chest, his eyes glancing down respectfully before he could see anything of note.

 

He listened as Mira drank her vial of vile potion while Adan plopped the pot with the balm in it into Cullen’s hands.

“Here, rub this into her neck and shoulders. I’ve got another patient to see this evening that I’m already running late for.” Adan sighed, shoving things into a sack as he made for the door.

“You’re leaving?” Mira called out looking rather worried.

“You’ll be alright now, that potion should settle out and keep you well until the end of the withdrawal, the balm is to stop the headache and relieve that pounding sensation. If you’re worried about the Commander, there’s no need, no finer man in camp. He’ll rub that balm on your neck and then see you back to your quarters when you’re ready. And don’t be worried bout him taking liberties, as you can see he hasn’t even looked up past the bed since you took your shirt off.” Adan explained.

“This is highly irregular Adan!” Cullen complained sharply.

“Indeed, but there is literally no one else I’d trust right now to do it. Now I must go before my other patient loses a leg to frostbite!” Adan grumped as he took his leave.

 

The second the healer was out the door, Mira moved to put her shirt back on.

 

“Wha- what are you doing?” he asked in confusion.

“Well it’s obvious you are uncomfortable with this. I’ll be fine once I get some rest, if you could help me back to my cabin though I’d appreciate it.” She told him with a quiet voice, her movements were slow as if she was in a lot of pain and by the Maker Cullen knew exactly what she was going through and there was no way he’d let her suffer through it alone.

“Nonsense. If you want to go back to your cabin, fine, but afterwards I’ll be following the doctor’s advice and administering his balm. This is your health _my la_ -Mira, there is no reason you need to suffer.”

“I’m sure several Templars would disagree with you.” Mira sighed, her voice muffled by her position.

 

Her quip may have been muffled but he heard it just as clearly as if she had shouted it at him. So that’s what she saw in him… a Templar.

“Mira, I’m not a Templar… not anymore… I know you dislike them and therefore by extension, Me.” He told her quietly, he was trying to be considerate of her headache while getting this out, he’d never been very good with words.

“I know now I have been party to horrible things, that the order I was a part of did horrible things. In my youth, my anger blinded me, I was hateful and stern with the mages in my care… there was times I even thought them to be less than people but I never hurt them, I always tried to… *Sigh* I know what I felt was wrong and the things that happened at Kirkwall shame me.”

“I can’t say I’m not glad to hear you say that Commander. Miles off point but still reassuring… I’m sorry I’ve been so sharp with you, as you can see, I’m not quite 100% and well I had rather horrid nightmare before you sent for me. I think I’ve just been in a terrible mood since I woke and vomited my guts up.” She joked softly, still tender but he wanted to believe that this was something, the start of something… an olive branch.

 

Cullen nodded slightly in understanding as she accepted the explanation, even though he hadn’t been able to go into detail… she didn’t see him as one of the Templars who hurt her and that was a good thing… a really good thing. If they were going to maintain a professional relationship within this inquisition then there needed to be a foundation of trust, of understanding… mostly he was just relieved that she didn’t hate him as he seemed to think.

 

She shuffled over to him on the cot, turning slightly to reveal her shoulders before turning her head coyly to look at him.

“Do you think I can push this new found mutual appreciation to get you to rub my shoulders Commander?” she asked and even though she was exhausted and sore there was still this teasing smirk pulling at her plump lips.

 

Cullen looked at her and couldn’t help but flush, he was floundering and he knew it, it wasn’t often beautiful women asked him to put his hands on them… well some did, late at night when he was on patrol in Kirkwall… but not like this, not like her.

“I uh- I of course!” he stumbled over his words, tongue becoming heavy in his mouth and he felt his hands begin to sweat.

 

She smiled at him, pulling her loose shirt down until her shoulders were bared, ready for the salve. Nervously he cracked open the pot, the strong scent of elfroot filling his nose. Dripping his fingers into the pot left them tingling with the enchantment that allowed the salve to work faster. Mira pulled her hair off her neck with a quick twist, pulling it over her shoulder before Cullen, cautiously began to spread the salve down her neck, taking great care not to add too much pressure.

He felt Mira hum in contentment, leaning into his fingers in a silent request for him to push harder into her skin. He remembered the techniques used by the healers he saw in Kirkwall when his neck became too stiff to concentrate, dragging his thumbs firmly down her neck and out along the tops of her shoulders pulling the muscles and willing them to relax.

Her sighs and groans were making this simple task all the more difficult, he needed to listen to them in order to know where best to treat her but that wasn’t the only reason he listened, oh no. They were addictive, the knowledge that he was bringing her relief with this simple pressure was… addictive, her sounds were addictive… everything about her was addictive.

 

Eventually she started to sink back further towards him, he could see her eyes drooping and slipping closed.

“Do you want me to stop, my lady?” he asked softly, her voice was deeper than he expected, huskier and Mira hummed contently at the question, sinking further back so she leant against his chest, her eyes closed as she moved into his warmth.

Surprised and lulled into complacency by the subtle intimacy that they had shared, he sat there and allowed her to cuddle into him as he absently moved to rub the tops of her shoulders with light but calloused thumbs.

They both stayed there for a while quietly, neither one of them wanting to break the silence.

 

Outside of the small Cabin, Haven went on like normal, the sounds of the village going to coming back from the taverns dinner slowly began to increase, encroaching on the quiet the two of them had created.

Mira moved first, breaking away from his contact as she sat up sleepily. She yawned, stretched before shivering at the lack of warmth that had provided for her. 

“I think, maybe I should get back to my cabin… before I really fall asleep.” She sighed, a tired smile, tugging again at her lips. He wondered if she was actually smiling or if she was just putting one on to be polite.

“I’ll walk you back, would you like me to get you some dinner on the way? We will be passing the tavern after all.” He offered, to be honest he himself was hungry… but he wasn’t sure it was just for food.

 

She looked up at him, her hands idly reaching around to pull her thick coat back on, trying to block out the constant cold of the Frostbacks.

“Are you asking me to dinner Commander?” she asked teasingly.

Cullen flushed again at her comment, maker he was doing a lot of that around her! “Yes. No! I mean are you hungry? I’m hungry, I just thought-“

“Cullen, relax I’m only teasing.” She assured softly.

“You said my name.” he muttered softly, he was surprised to say the least, she hadn’t called him anything but Commander since she arrived.

“I just thought, if I’m going to insist on you calling me by my name, I should call you by yours… should I not?” there was a slight blush to her cheeks, it was good the colour returning to her, she looked good…

 

Cullen was staring at her, thoughts rushing through his head a mile a minute, Mira tilted her head at him obviously expected a response which snapped Cullen out his mind and back to her.

“I-I no. Yes! Shit. I meant, please call me Cullen.” He fumbled, face flushing brighter than it had before. Maker some fearsome leader of men he was, Commander of the Inquisition couldn’t talk to a woman without blushing like an idiot.

He saw it before he heard it, her whole face brightening in joy as this light, bubbling laugh that seemed to fill the room with a welcoming sound, one that he desperately wished to hear more of.

 

“Glad to hear it Cullen.” She smiled, standing from the cot, leaving him as a puddle of the man he once was, furiously trying to gather the scraps of his brain that had promptly been scattered at the sound of her amusement.

“Dinner?” he asked, now being reduced to only one word response for fear of embarrassing himself further.

“Dinner it is.” She smiled shaking her head lightly as she lead him out of the cabin and into the snow.

Maker he barely knew this woman… and yet… he could barely keep his eyes off her.

 

**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did i mention that Cullen is a goof? but an adorable goof.


	3. Night Time Encounters (NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cullen get's a late night visitor.  
> (NSFW)

 

_ Chapter 3 – Night time encounters. _

 

 

It had been a long day. They were always long days now. Up before dawn to see to the troops, down long after nightfall, kept up by candle light to write reports… the days made even longer by the need in his veins, aching for the Lyrium.

He was at his desk again, it was so close to the tiny cot he called a bed that he never seemed to lay down for more than a few moments before remembering something else he needed to do, some report to write.

He hung his head in his hands with a heavy sigh. It was going to be another long night, he stared at the pages in front of him as if they were written in Orlesian, complete gibberish, he would have to get them translated in the morning… funny he could have sworn they were in Common when they’d been delivered.

 

There was a faint rustling outside his tent, light footfalls in the snow coming closer. He looked up to see the Herald poke her head into his tent, the act of her coming here at this time of night was a surprise all in itself.

“Ah, Commander. I thought you might still be up. May I?” she asked with a friendly smile on her face. Oh, her face, her voice, oh maker it does things to him. He caught himself the moment he started to think those untoward thoughts about her and straightened his posture out of habit.

“Herald, of course, please come in.” he gestured, half standing to guide her to the chair in-front of his desk.

She smiled, coming in wearing a thick blue fur lined cloak to fight against the cold outside. She sat coquettishly, her legs crossed over revealing her long brown boots. His eyes followed up her leg, the form fitting leather, perfectly moulded around her calf to the point where it met pale tender… bared skin.

 

He tore his eyes up only to find her watching him with an amused interest.

“Is there something I can help you with Herald?” he asked, clearing his throat.

 

She smiled at him, a seductive thing as she leaned back in her chair, letting the cloak drift further up her thigh. Still no other fabric insight… just leather, skin and the soft looking blue cloak.

“I was speaking to some of your lieutenants and they seem to be under the impression that you don’t get out much. So, I told them that any man with muscles like that and a scar that so perfectly draws the eye to his lips must have women lining up in droves to lay with him.” She teased with a sinful smirk drawing his eyes back up to her face where she raised her hands up to her hair casually. She had it pinned up elegantly on her head and with the twitch of two clever fingers, she sent those fiery red locks tumbling around her shoulders.

 

He went to talk, to declare the ideas coming from her mouth mad, but she got there before him, continuing in her ever so seductive way.

 

“They then told me of how you spend all your free time alone in your tent, never taking breaks, never attending to your own needs unless someone else requests it of you.” She continued, her hands floating in the air as she spoke. Long fingers dancing in the candlelight, it made him wonder how soft she would feel, were her hands roughened from her travels or were they as soft as her noble name.

“Herald, what are you getting at? Why are you here?” he questioned, suddenly needing answers.

She rose smoothly, her whole figure slinking its way around the desk, causing him to turn in his chair to face her.

“Isn’t it obvious?” she asked, leaning down to cup his jaw in her palm, her face not inches from his own. His eyes locked with hers, they weren’t as blue as he thought, there was grey in those eyes along with traces of brown, streaking out from her pupils, which were dilating with the proximity.

 

“I have a request of you Commander, I need you to stop what you’re doing and _fuck_ me.” She purred, her lips so close to his that he could taste the sweetness of her breath and the warmth of it against his cheeks.

 

“I w-whAT!?” he cried out in surprise, pulling his head out of her hand as he bolted upright. “You want me to -What!” he demanded, seeking clarification and completely ignoring the throb her words sent to his cock and the lurch his heart made in his chest.

 

“Fuck me Commander, I need you to fuck me. I need someone I can trust, someone who can satisfy me, someone who desires me in the way I desire them.” She continued, her voice low and clever, seducing him in the best possible way.

He took a step closer, nervous but _Oh he wanted this, wants her_. His heart was thudding in his chest, anticipation mixing with desire mixing with nervousness.

“You desire me, my Herald?” he asked lowering his tone.

“Yes.” She replied with a heavy breath as she stood not inches from him, “So much so that I came all the way here from my cabin wearing nothing but this.” She smirked, flicking her thumb over the clasp holding her cloak together and letting it open to expose her. She was wearing nothing but her boots and the fur around her shoulders, her pale skin, the curve of her hips and swell of her plentiful breasts all on display… all for him.

 

Cullen couldn’t hold back anymore, she was beautiful, sharp, seductive, and maker he wanted her. She’d played him like a fiddle and he was oh so happy to dance to her tune. He surged forwards, arm wrapping around her waist to draw her in close, her body yielded to him beautifully, moulding against his chest like she was made for it.

He practically melted when she made the move to kiss him, fingers tugging in his hair to bring him down to her, her lips softer than velvet and tasted of sweet fruits. She guided him back to his cot, straddling him as she pushed him down, their minimal clothing forgotten in their haste, she was in control, leading him to the places she wanted to be touched. _Sharp, powerful and she wanted him_.

 

Her hands touched his chest, softer than he imagined, stroking the sparse hair there before leaning into kiss him again. Maker he wouldn’t ever get enough of that. Her kisses, the taste of summer on her tongue, her fiery hair falling around them. His hands slid down her back, perfect skin un-marred from any of her trials as he came to rest against her plush arse, pulling her over his desperate cock.

She, all of her was perfect, all of her wanted him and he was happy. So ridiculously happy he wanted to cry out her name, hold her tight and never let go, he wanted to protect her, care for her and bring her the world she so very much deserved.

Her hands planted over his chest, bracing herself as she sank down on his cock. 

 

“ _Cullen_.” She moaned softly, her hips wriggling and twisting as she adjusted to his size.

 

He let her take as much time as she needed, his hands drifting over her soft body with curious fingers. Her skin was luscious and soft but she had a strength to her that he was only barely scratching the surface of. His hands drifted upwards, towards her breasts as she began to rock her hips into a rhythm.

They were full and heavy, larger than the average woman he’d met. He lent up to kiss them, suckle her pink nipple into his mouth. The moment his tongue touched the puckered flesh, she gasped, rolling her hips faster as she started to ride him and he started to lose himself to her.

 

“Ah, Cullen.” She cried holding him tight, his mouth on her breasts, her riding his cock like she was made for it. He was drunk on her, so high on the feeling of being inside her, her tight, wet...

“Commander.” She said again, this time there was something off about it, not quite right, more firm maybe? He looked up at her only to find her smiling at him, her hand sliding along his jaw as she readjusted herself to sit in his lap, rocking their bellies together with him still inside her… _just a little bit more was all he needed._

“Commander Cullen!” she shouted this time, starling him into rearing back, as he did though he could feel her slipping out of his grasp. The soft skin under his fingers becoming harder and harder to find.

 

 

His eyes snapped open, jolting upright in his cot, arms stretched out in front of him, chasing her even in his bleary state.

“Commander Cullen, get your arse up outa bed man!” came gruff Starkhaven accent through his tent flaps.

 

 

Cullen groaned, both in irritation and in immense disappointment… it seemed so real… that she, she came to him, wanted him… ah maker’s breath he must be the biggest fool in Thedas.

“I take it by the noise you’re up then?” Rylen snickered through the canvas.

“No. Bugger off Rylen!” He growled back, rubbing his head in his hands before looking down at his crotch at his quickly deflating cock. Urgh, he could still taste the lingering effects of her kisses, remember her taste so clearly it felt like he just had her here only moments ago… and now this!

“Ooh, someone woke up on the wrong side of the cot this morning. Anyway, I’m here like you requested, I might add, to remind you that you’re meant to be training with the Herald at the next bell.”

 

Cullen groaned, rather pitifully, he had forgotten about that… seriously Maker… what did I do to deserve this?

 

“Give me a few minutes.” He sighed, resigning to his fate. He knew if he made some excuse to the Hera- to Mira about not being able to train it would destroy any chance of moving through the subtle air of distrust they had now…. Worse than that, she would be… disappointed in him.

 

He heard Rylen grunt before shuffling away, the light outside was still dim meaning it was just past sunrise… but that’s what you get when you ask a friend coming off night watch to wake you up. Cullen hurried through his morning rituals, strapping on his armour with practised ease before heading out to meet Rylen who was just collecting two bowls of warm oats from a runner. He smiled thankfully as he was passed his breakfast.

“Cheers, what I wouldn’t give for some coffee as well. It’s too bloody cold here.” Rylen complained, although it was to be expected, he’d been complaining about the cold since they left Kirkwall.

“Why don’t you use that famous charm of yours on the Ambassador, I’m sure she could get you some. Also, if that works, I take mine with milk, no sugar.” Cullen snorted, chuckling at his own joke.

Rylen chuckled at it to, digging into his oats before the chill of the Frostbacks could cool them.

The pair traded reports and talk amicably about new training regiments for the recruits before Rylen stumbled on to a dangerous topic… one that so easily drew a blush to his cheeks.

 

Mira.

 

“So, I hear from the men that you and the Herald were getting pretty cosy last night.” Rylen started, not even in a teasing way… not like how Mira teased, but the mere thought of her brought back flashes of his dream, of the skin of her shoulders, leading down to those breasts of hers.

“There’s nothing going on Rylen, the Herald was unwell and needed assistance, that is all.” He replied, tampering down on his childish emotions like he was putting out a flash fire… and in a way, he was, she was all fire and fury… and sex. _Stop!_

“Uh-huh, so that obviously explains the way you’re blushing right now.” Rylen noted, spooning another mouthful of oats quickly into his gob as he tried to hide his mirth.

“Just the chill of the morning air.” He grumbled stubbornly as he finally managed to reign in his emotions.

“Oh but of course.” Rylen chuckled graciously allowing the topic to drop… but Cullen knew better, Rylen was too clever for this… there would surely be more teasing later.

“I should mention though that she’s already down there, she was up early this morning, just before day break to run laps around the perimeter. I bumped into her on the way here.” Rylen added almost absently.

 

Cullen turned to him with a disapproving look, before quickly scarfing down the last of his breakfast and proceeded to walk just that little bit faster towards the training area Cassandra had set up to train the Herald. All the while listening to Rylen and his annoying low giggles behind him.

**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who's left Kudos, comments and even bookmarked this fic! I keep looking at numbers slowly going up and giggling that people have actually read this!
> 
> Also i did say that you'd have to work for the smut, but sometimes i'm nice and i do things like this.


	4. Training montage.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> *To the tune of the final countdown* IT'S A TRAINING MONTAGE. 
> 
> Cullen attempts to train with Mira, (And not get distracted)  
> Bets are placed, taunts are made and Mira gets a bit saucy over a drink.

_ Chapter 4 - Training montage. _

 

“Herald! What has gotten into you today?” Cassandra snapped as she watched the other woman throw herself at the training dummy. Mira paused mid swing, the tip of her blade poised at the training dummy’s throat as she turned to look at her captor turned friend.

 

“What did I do?” Mira asked, confused at her friends worry.

“I’ve been trying to get your attention for the last 5 minutes and that is the second training dummy you’ve destroyed since you got down here!” Cassandra snarled forcing Mira to back away from the mostly destroyed dummy.

“Oh that, it’s nothing just trying to practice. I was worried I might have lost some of my skills over time but you never really forget muscle memory, right?” She shrugged dodging her friend’s worried glance.

“Well if you keep practising like that this Inquisition won’t have any Training dummies left and then what will I hit!” Cassandra shot with her attempt at a joke. The sight of Cassandra trying to make a joke caught Mira well and truly off guard as she let out a bark of laughter and dropped her knives into the dirt.

 

“Cassandra, you are truly a treasure.” Mira laughed as she reached for the flask of water and towel that Rylen had grabbed for her before he left to go see to his other duties. He’d taken a liking to her after the whole mess with her father and with the Commander’s permission had appointed himself her personal guard to help her adjust and find her way around Haven now that she was no longer a prisoner.

“I am not. Now you need someone to spar with, lest you keep destroying Inquisition resources.”  Cassandra grunted as she gestured to the one of the training spaces. Mira followed onto what she was suggesting.

“Is that why you asked the Commander to train with me? He should be on his way, we agreed to it last night.” Mira explained as she leaned down to pick up her training blades, testing the weight of them in her hands again before trying, and failing to flip them hilt to hilt like she used to.

 

 

“Lady Cassandra! Heral- Mira. Sorry I’m late, I didn’t anticipate you’d be up so early. My apologies.” Cullen started as he came into view, catching himself before calling her the Herald knowing just how much she disliked the formalities.

“Nonsense, I was only up this early because I slept so much yesterday and I thought it might be best to get some extra practice while Haven was quiet.” Mira added with a warm smile. If Cullen watched her closely enough he would be able to count the ways how her everyday smiles differ from the bubbling laughter that he saw last night, he wondered if this was a mask she put on to make others feel at ease or for herself.

 

“Yes, she’s already destroyed two training dummies this morning, please spar with her. The Inquisition cannot afford to keep both myself and the Herald stocked with breakable stationary opponents.” Cassandra smirked before taking her leave.

“Mm I think I would like to see Josie handle the requisition order on that one. It would be fun to watch.” Mira joked quietly, just for Cullen to hear before she turned back towards the training ring, her body shifting to allow Cullen to see just how well she decimated the training dummies earlier… maybe they really would need to order more anyway.

 

 

“So, what do you want to work on today?” Mira asked trying to figure out how to start as she did some stretches to limber up. Cullen was however distracted, the light armour she wore to train in was well fitted, it allowed her easy movement and outlined her body in a way that Cullen was sure to find distracting.

After a few moments where Cullen just stood there lost in thought Mira continued her ruminations.

“Maybe we could just spar with each other and see where that leads?” she offered, twirling her daggers in her hands as she adjusted her footing, sinking low to centre her body before pitching forwards onto the balls of her feet, testing the ground.

Cullen hummed in agreement, collecting the sword and shield someone had left out earlier for him. He tested the weight, training equipment for sure, slightly lighter than what he’d normally use but still effective.

“Don’t think I’ll go easy on you Cullen. I hope you’re prepared to have your ass handed to you?” Mira provoked playfully causing Cullen to let out a gruff chuckle.

“I hope you’re not expecting me to go down easy Mira, I’ll make sure to keep you on your toes.”

 

 

The two of them stood at opposite ends of the area, readying their respective weapons and stances. They were both waiting, anticipating, sizing each other up. Cullen was patient, he watched her, analysed how her body moved, how her muscles coiled and relaxed, like a cat ready to strike.

 _There._ Along her shoulder, he saw the muscle twitch and the pull of her lip to reveal sharp white teeth as she leapt into action. She shot across the field seeming to come at him head on and full pace, sprinting faster and faster, her daggers crossing in front of her like a makeshift shield.

Cullen stood his ground, planted his feet firmly and readied his shield. If she was determined to come at him like this, then all her speed would meet his shield like water crashing over a rock.

He kept her in her sight and then he saw it, the small cloth sack in her hand, concealed by the hilt of her dagger. He saw it too late as she twisted, flinging the object, a smoke bomb against his shield, surrounding him in darkness.

 

“Shit, shit, shit - AHhhhhh- oof!” He heard her exclaim, still ahead of him. Obviously, something surprised her. Then he felt it, her solid form colliding, not with his shield but with his side, completely taking him by surprise!

They both went sprawling, an undignified yelp left his lips as his sword went flying followed by two more metal objects hitting the ground. Her knee slammed into his thigh, dangerously close to sensitive territory while his jaw knocked into the top of her head.

The smoke bomb was still in effect, coating them in darkness so all that could be heard was the dull groaning of the two of them as Cullen lay in the dirt with Mira on top of him clutching her head.

  

“Owwww. You’ve got a bloody hard chin!” she complained, her hand now groping around trying to find her bearings.

“Where the hell did you get a smoke grenade?” he asked through a clenched jaw, he should be grateful it wasn’t his nose, it would have probably broken at the impact.

“I made it,” she answered, her hand patting around until she found his face, eliciting a hiss from him underneath her, “I’m sorry, I didn’t expect it to be that strong and I was trying to get around you, not run into you.” She groaned, rolling off him and to his side.

  

The smoke was dissipating, he turned to look at her, noting the swelling red mark on her forehead from where she collided into him. She looked at him, well squinted really… and started to laugh.

Really laugh.

“Well I thought I’d knock you on your ass sometime during this match but I’ll admit this wasn’t what I had in mind.” She giggled, rolling over as she pushed herself up off the floor.

Cullen couldn’t help but laugh with her, it was more her surprise at the bomb working so well before she collided with him that humoured him so.

 

 

Eventually the pair got themselves up to have another go at sparring, however the smoke from Mira’s grenade seemed to draw a small crowd, most curious, others _like Varric_ were now placing and organising bets on who would win, even Cassandra and Solas had come back down to see what the commotion was.

 

 

The two of them stood there, frozen and confused as to what was going on. Mira was fighting the rising heat to her face and Cullen was only barley containing his glare at the dwarf, considering calling off the whole sparring match to shout at the dwarf because surely, he was the reason so many people had appeared!

 

 

“What are you two waiting for? Begin!” Cassandra called, Mira now spurred into action by her friend’s insistence moved to strike first. Crossing the field on quick feet as she moved to strike at the Commanders unprotected side, this time with no grenade to hide her approach. Cullen moved quickly to block her attack with his shield as he moved to strike back.

“You’re quicker than I expected Cullen.” Mira teased dancing away from his attacks as she positioned herself to strike again.

“So are you, but are you fast enough for this?” He shot back as she came close for another attack. He rounded on his heel, using her surprise to catch her unaware and land a weak strike to her thigh. She grunted at his words, dropping low to move under his shield and spring up to tackle him, a move he clearly wasn’t expecting as he was flung backwards by her agile body.

He grunted on impact, his shield having been torn from his arm by the manoeuvre as he lay there under her body, pinned by the thighs against his chest.

“Far quicker than you are Commander.” She purred raising an eyebrow as she looked down at him from her position. She licked her lips slightly using the supposed distraction as a move to place her blade against his throat and claim victory. Cullen although distracted by her lips- _and the unhelpful images from last night’s dream_ \-  saw the move coming and used the new-found freedom on his arm to throw her to the side as he scrambled to get up and reclaim his shield, a strong flush now spreading across his face as she watched her now circle the area to collect the knife she dropped before her manoeuvre.

 

He watched her and waited for an opening, a crowd was gathering around the space as they watched on, Varric was could be seen filtering amongst them placing bets as to who would win.

As expected she struck first, moving at a blinding pace as she unleashed a flurry of spinning strikes against his shield before she leapt up to follow her spin with a well-aimed kick to the head. The move connected with a force that rattled his skull and caused him to blindly push back with his shield, which luckily, she wasn’t expecting as it caught her at an awkward angle and shoved her backwards into the dirt. He followed her, shaking off the rattling of his skull to catch her while she was down.

She played him, as she struggled on the floor he came looming over her, sword going to aim for her throat when she shot out with a well-aimed kick which managed to knock the sword from his grasp and used the remaining momentum to flip backwards to where she’d managed to knock it, quickly preventing him from going to collect it, putting him at a disadvantage.

The crowd cheered at the Heralds unexpected manoeuvre and Cullen saw even more money change hands. He looked at her again, Mira was smiling now. There was a fluidity in her movements that only came from battle. The crowd wanted a show, he’d give them one, something to lift their spirts.

 

“Is that all you’ve got Herald? I’ve met Chantry Sisters who could fight better in the field than this.” Cullen taunted, raising his voice loud enough for the crowd to hear. The responding laughs he got from the Herald had everyone’s heads snapping to her.

“As it stands Commander I suspect those Sisters to be remarkably patient women if they could put up with your clumsy footwork. This battle is a dance which steps you’ve obviously not mastered.” She laughed giving a little twirl to prove her point much to the joy of the crowd.

She attacked again, coming up fast in front of his only to disappear just as fast, traces of smoke fuzzing his sight and in the split second it took for him to wonder where the hell she went he felt it. Her warm taut body pressed up along his back and the press of a blunt knife against his throat. He sighed feeling the defeat but watching the pleasant expressions form over his soldier’s faces as they realised their Herald had bested their Commander.

 

“I believe this one’s mine Cullen.” She purred into his ear as she waited for him to drop his shield and raise his arms in defeat, only when he complied did she let him out of her hold.

“I believe it is my Lady. Well done.” He smiled, the fight had done him good to, the rush of adrenaline and air into his system almost made up for the pain in his arm from where she had dislodged his sword. Mira followed his gaze to where he was examining the quickly forming bruise and allowed herself a small smile.

“Come on, I make a salve that does wonders for bruises. Plus, I’m sure I need to find a way to thank you.”  Mira replied giving him one of those mind-melting smiles she was beginning to be known for.

Cullen followed Mira allowing her to carve a path through the crowds that had surrounded them back to her quarters.  As he followed he noticed that she was limping slightly, did she pull something when he threw her, how was the lump on her head? As soon as the thought crossed his mind he instantly felt guilty for causing her pain. She led her through the door to her room and gestured for him to sit down as she bent down into a box by the door and started rummaging through a set of jars and vials.

 

“So, how’s it feel having your arse handed to you Cullen?” she chuckled as she looked through the box. Cullen scoffed in response, his eyes trailing over her backside as she bent away from him.

“It feels something akin to a kick in the head. Surprising that.” He replied, drifting his eyes away, maker he was watching her too much.

“I could make a joke about having your head up your arse but I’ll spare you that. Here.” She smiled warmly as she passed him a clear vial and a salve.

“Oh, your restraint is greatly appreciated.” He chuckled dryly.

 

Mira just giggled at him, she seemed energised from the fight if also a little weary, still needed to work on her stamina but with the way she fought him, she was doing alright.

“I need to thank you.” She smiled, it was a quiet, almost shy thing. “I haven’t had this much fun… in a very long time.” As she spoke, she fiddled with a bottle of rich golden liquid.

“As leader of the Inquisition’s forces I’m glad to hear my training techniques are considered ‘fun’. Perhaps you could tell that to some of the recruits when I put them through their paces?” he asked, trying to continue the light-hearted humour for a little longer.

“Commander Cullen, are you sure you didn’t hit your funny bone somewhere back there? I mean I’m sure I have a salve for that somewhere!” she smirked, pouring two mugs of the strong-smelling liquid for them.

 

“A little early don’t you think?” he smirked point to the mug, which she readily pushed into his outstretched hand.

“Eh, when you spend your youth with pirates, it’s never too early for a light drink.” There was a coy smile to her lips, the corners of her mouth pinched together as if she was trying not to laugh before she quickly took a long sip.

Cullen chuckled lightly, honestly, she was a delight to be around. Funny, strong willed…

“I would be interested in hearing about some of your travels Hera- sorry Mira.” He ducked his head, taking a quick drink to try and hide his misstep. The drink itself was delicious, fruity and refreshing with only a slight kick underneath it all.

“Nice save, so you want to hear about me? Well what can I say, I’m 27, born on the 4th of Wintersmarch, my favourite colour is blue and I once managed to win 3 horses and a permanent residence in a brothel in Denerim while waiting for my cargo to load.” She listed off, laughing and almost bouncing comically as she did so.

 

“You- you _What?!_ ” he spluttered trying to keep up. His surprised must have amused Mira greatly because she positively howled with laughter, her whole face turning red as she struggled to get enough breath in to continue cackling. Cullen rubbed his face, hiding the smile that pulled at his lips due to her antics before gesturing for her to continue.

“I was what? 18? 19? It was my first big job out of Rivain, simply put, sail into Denerim harbour, wait for the cargo to be loaded and sail out again in the morning. Samuel, my first mate, dragged me out to the brothel where the rest of the crew were spending the night while the store keeper sorted and secured the cargo. ‘Good Captains take time to enjoy a job well done with their crew and trusts others to do their jobs.’ … he told me that to get me off the ship and out of poor Henry’s hair while he tried to count cargo.” Mira laughed taking another sip.

 

Cullen listen, enraptured, she had a smile plastered to her face. A true smile, and she continued.

 

“Eventually the some of the crew drag me into a game with some of the regulars and they were betting all kinds of bizarre things! A stolen ring from an unpopular Arl, Seeds from the Kokari wilds to start your own garden, a bottle of grey whiskey and a potion for restoring sexual urges to name a few. So, in comparison my prize of 3 pretty mares and a free brothel room whenever I needed is hardly the stuff of legend, but we had fun where we could make it.”

 

“I’m surprised you didn’t go for the bottle of Grey whiskey.” He teased raising his mug at her with a smile.

“Oh believe me I tried… and so did the entirety of my crew! But I really wanted it, I bet everything I had on me on my hand without looking… you want to know what I had?” she asked, winding up for the punch line.

 

Cullen raised his eyebrow at her, “What did you have?”

 

“A full hand of serpents! Literally the worst hand you could ever possibly be dealt!” she threw he head back in laugher, red hair tumbling over her shoulders as she bared her teeth in amusement.

 

“Dear maker, and I thought I was bad at cards!” he grinned back, “So just how much did you lose?” he asked intrigued.

Mira smiled at him, a sultry and tempting thing. Something that would make his knees weak if he was that kind of a man.

“Well we weren’t playing for money, more like things, possessions. So, when I said I bet everything I had on me… I meant it, I played the rest of the games sitting naked in front of the fire until I won them back and more. I think it worked to my advantage, don’t you?”

 

Cullen wanted to reply, he was staring at her as he tried desperately to think of some witty or polite response but all he could think about was her, naked body… glistening in the firelight. Pale skin become golden in the warm light, freckles and shadows tracing patters over her shoulders and down her arms…the shadows casting over her breasts as she’d lean forward to play her hand of cards.

 

“Cullen?” Mira asked, her head cocked to the side with curiosity.

*Bang, Bang*

 

“My Lady Herald are you in there?” asked a runner from the other side of the door.

Mira paused, following Cullen’s eyes as they flickered to the door and then returned to his blushing cheeks. _Oh how beautifully he blushed, it made her wonder if blushed in other places too?_

 

“Yes, go on.” She responded eventually.

“Sister nightingale and Ambassador Montilyet wish to speak to you in the Ambassador’s office at your earliest convenience, My Lady.” The runner reported.

 

Mira sighed, tipping the last of her drink down in one smooth draw that seemed to capture Cullen’s attention all over again.

 

“Tell them I’ll be there in a moment.” She replied, her eyes still trained on Cullen.

Cullen looked at her, almost nervously, _well,_ if Commanders of armies get nervous at the sight of beautiful, calculating women… _cautious then?_ _Curious_?

“It’s been… really nice talking with you. Maybe we could do this again? When you’re not busy shouting at recruits of course.” Mira asked, there was a smile on her face, a hint of tease in her tone.

 

He smiled back at her, a true smile that wouldn’t fade from his face for hours to come.

“Mira, I would like nothing more.”

She smiled back, her grin matching his in intensity as she rose from her seat, tucking a stray hair behind her ear. He watched as she slowly started to leave, heading for the chantry to see the ambassador and spymaster. All the while he couldn’t help but think of her.

 

 

Of the smile on her lips and how it carried up to her eyes, bright and beautiful, and how he would work to keep giving her reasons to smile like that.

 

_All for her, The Herald of Andraste… for Mira… oh Maker, he had it bad._

 

 


	5. Nightmares and late night drinking. (NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mira's nightmares lead her to make some 'interesting' decisions.  
> (NSFW.)

** Chapter 5 - Nightmares and late night drinking. **

 

It was late and once again the night’s breeze brought along an uncomfortable silence Mira longed to be without. The silence was discomforting, invasive and harsh. It left her with herself and her thoughts, two things she’d rather be without. And it wasn’t like she wanted to be awake now! She’d gone to bed at a reasonable hour and everything but tonight like every other night without fail she was woken by her nightmares.

 

Tonight’s was particularly nasty. It started off great! She was at home, her home in Ferelden. Finn, her husband, was cooking dinner while Mira tended to the fire. She had insisted early on that not everything in the house needed magic but honestly it was because Finn was better at making stew than she was and he didn’t particularly like the dirt and little spiders they’d find around the house, so Mira took on those roles while he acted to his strengths.

They ate, he listened to her tell a tale about Rivain and she listened and corrected him about the things he read about the country in the circle with practical knowledge she’d picked up living there. He smiled, kissed her softly and asked if she’d like to go to bed, apparently, there was this mage named Anders who was famous for his sexual electricity spell and after he had told her about it, Mira had somehow managed to convince Finn to learn it for her. Her sweet, slightly finicky and kind mage. Her life was good… but she knew something was off, it wasn’t quite right.

And then it changed, dropped into horror like all nightmares do. The Knight-Captain her father sent was there, she could hear his laugh, feel his bloody hands touching her in places she never wanted to be touched. She could see Finn’s body, mangled and bloody in front of her, his staff broken in two… split into shards by the brutes that now held her down as their Knight-Captain took his fill. And what was worse, when she looked up again, looked past her dead husbands’ body she saw them.

Simpering nobility, all of them pitying her, mocking her! Telling her it was not her fault, the blood mage made her do it, made her disgrace her family by running. All the while she could hear the Knight-Captains grunts in her ear as he fucked her bloody, moaning in completion as she lay there bound and broken before he moved and let another one of his men take his fill.

 

Mira had woken, sweating and nauseous and wanting to scrub the traces of that memory from her mind and body. She wanted to scream, thrash against the walls, tear something apart in rage… she was shaking. She needed to forget, just for a little while, she needed a drink.

She dressed quickly, throwing a heavy cloak over her shoulders to fight against the cold and her shaking before she made her way down to the Tavern for an evening nightcap and hopefully some pleasant company to erase her haunting memories.

 

 

The drinks were coming in fast, Flissa was providing the Herald with only the very best on offer along with some beautiful yet fumbling attempts at flirtation. Mira wanted to lose herself… just _stop thinking_ , just for a little while and Flissa was helping her do just that! Lining up drink after drink, and all Mira had to do was pull out a charming smile or compliment and _boom_ new drink.

She was well on her way to being three sheets to the wind, before one of the soldiers caught her eye. The one from earlier, the one Cullen had ordered to watch her the other day. Mhmm Cullen, now what she wouldn’t do to have that scarred mouth between her legs. Maker, but the man over there, he looked different out of uniform. Rylen! That was it!

Mira waved over Flissa to pour her an extra drink before she went and made her move. And although she was rather drunk, she managed to strut her way over to the unsuspecting Knight-Captain.

 

 

“Herald, what brings you out at this hour?” Rylen asked with a polite smile as she sat opposite him at the small table he occupied. She noted that he also had a few drinks as evident by the different glasses on his table.

“Rylen, I told you to call me Mira, I thought I’d come down here at this hour to inspect the Inquisitions alcohol supply personally.” She smirked pushing him her spare tankard to which he accepted with a grin. “And I also thought I’d look for some handsome man to keep me company in these late hours.” She continued seductively, propping her elbows up on the table to give him a better view of her low-cut shirt.

Rylen looked up at her words in surprise and then at her before noting her tone and smirked back.

“Well Mira, I suppose I’ll just endeavour to make myself useful then.” The implication dripping in his Starkhaven accent.

 

The offer was made and quickly accepted, their drinks downed in quick gulps as Mira lead the Knight-Captain back to her room. The pair of them sneaking through the shadows to avoid the night guards.

Once the pair were inside, Rylen turned on her quickly seeking out her lips in a drunken kiss, his ale and her whatever Flissa a given her made an interesting combination on each other’s tongues. Mira moaned into Rylen’s mouth her hands quickly tugging at his shirt, Thank the Maker he wasn’t wearing his armour!

“Mira, fuck Mira, do you want this? Fuc- oh Maker. You minx.” he growled, grabbing her hands to pause her efforts. She moaned softly at the strength she felt in them before replying with a panting breath.

“Yes, fuck me Rylen. I want you to fuck me.” She moaned, dropping his shirt from between his fingers in the process.

 

After that neither party held back. Rylen proceeded to wildly remove Mira’s clothes, the laces on her trousers being torn in the process as Rylen flung both them and her small clothes to the other side of the room. Her drunken laughter bringing a smirk to his face and a cocky notion to his movements as he used his new-found position between her legs to lay kisses upwards along her thighs, revelling in the satisfied moan she gave at his efforts.

He worked his way up and down her legs, never staying in one spot for long, never straying too close to where she wants it most. He could smell her, see her wetness along her cunt and by the maker he wanted to taste her.

 

“No.” she moaned, tugging him upwards when he moved towards her soaked lips. “After, be gentle after. I need you to fuck me Rylen, I need you to be rough, make me feel it. Please!” she begged snaking her hand down his chest to palm his cock still trapped inside his trousers.

 

Rylen groaned at the contact and in his drunken lust, rutted into a few times before she managed to free him. Her hand, small but firm, long talented fingers which wrapped around his cock like a dream, stroking it, teasing it, driving him absolutely wild.

 

“Fuck Mira, you’re a goddess.” He moaned, his thick brogue resonating deep in his chest as he leaned over to press rough kisses into her neck, leaving wicked and angry red marks in his wake. He managed somehow in their frenzy to pull his shirt over his head and shove his trousers down just far enough out of the way so he could take her.

 

She spread her legs around him, opening wide and pressing up to grind her wet heat into him, moaning at the contact. She was too far gone to even attempt at being quiet now, the long drawn out pleas for him to take her sent Rylen into a lust filled trance.

He took himself in hand, rubbing the head of his cock along the slick of her folds before pressing in slowly. She hissed at the pressure, and by the maker she was tight. It had been awhile since the pressure had been this pleasurable. She smiled to herself, here she was fucking one Knight-Captain to get rid of the memory of another.

 

“Oh the irony.” She chuckled to herself, moaning softly when Rylen pushed himself to the hilt.

“Irony?” he asked with a breathless pant but Mira ignored him in favour of kissing him stupid and rocking up along his cock, coxing him into a steady but rough pace that had her muscles working to keep up with him.

His thrusts were rough and steady drawing Mira deeper and deeper into their pleasure, clearing her mind and lightening her spirits as she gave into the singular thought of _I need to cum, Maker I want to cum, please make me cum._

 

“Mira, fuck Mira I’m gonna- argh!” he growled, thrusting harder into her, shocking her right down to her very core. She was close, she could feel it on the tips of her toes but the problem was, he was closer. As hard as Rylen tried he couldn’t hold on long enough, he had just enough presence of mind to pull out of her before he came, stroking himself with tight grip until he came into his own hand, moaning raggedly into her neck as he propped himself up with the other hand.

 

Mira whined in despair, she was so close and desire was overruling any other notion as she quickly pressed his shoulders down, manoeuvring his still panting mouth down and between her legs. He took to it like a starving man, having enough thought to wipe his seed off on his own discarded shirt and licking it clean before he used his hand to spread her wide, fucking her on his tongue with her legs around his ears.

He used his other hand to softly press his fingers into her, three of them, thicker than her own and perfect for mimicking the stretch of his cock as he moved onto suckling on her clit. _Oh, Maker she was close._

Her own hands busied themselves by playing with her breasts, tugging and teasing her own nipples until they were hard and sensitive to her touch. Rylen started to read the signs of her impending climax, pressing his fingers in deeper, harder, making his mouth work longer and paying extra attention to her sensitive clit.

Mira panted loudly, her voice pitching into high breathy moans. She could feel it again, right there, just about to break and wash over her. She moaned loudly, trying to both revel in the pleasure and warn the man between her legs that she was likely about to crush him with her thighs! And then it hit, like a fire spell to the gut, searing, spreading and twitching all along her body and she cried out with pleasure.

 

But her moans must have been heard through the door as cries of pain as suddenly her bedroom door swung open and in its place stood one very concerned guard.

One **_very_** concerned guard who just happened to be the tall blonde imposing figure of Commander Cullen. He stood there shocked at what he was witnessing, the red flush quickly splashing across his face so violently that it was hard to tell where his blush finished and his coat began!

 

Blearily she glanced up towards the noise but as she did, Mira’s thighs were covering Rylen’s face and also his ears as he continued to pleasure her, sending her into a whole new series of aftershocks which racked her body with pleasurable spasms. She moaned lustily while watching the embarrassed Commander flush even further at her display. She watched him, through heavily lidded eyes as Cullen fumbled slightly, not quite knowing what to do in this situation, so he just sorts of stepped back out the door and closed it behind him.

 

_Fuck, drunk me is awesome. Visions of Cullen mmmm._

 

Mira moans softened as Rylen’s tongue started to sooth the pleasure he had caused her, with gentle kisses and rumbling words of praise spoken right up against her very core. She sighed contently, stroking his hair to signify that she was finished.

Rylen sighed, pleased with himself at not leaving her unsatisfied while he paused to catch his breath, leaning back on his heels to drink in the sight.

“Thank you, Rylen, that was… I needed that.” Mira sighed content to languish against her blankets.

“No. Thank you Mira for letting me. If you ever need help like this again, you’ve only to ask… and don’t worry about anything, if you like I can be very discreet.” He assured with gentle kisses that trailed up her stomach.

“I would appreciate that, both the discretion and the offer for more. I might just take you up on that.” She smiled and kissed him back before he moved away to collect his clothes. He quickly managed to pull up his trousers as they only slid down to mid-thigh when he fucked her before he pulled on his shirt, noting the dried cum stain on the lower hem. He sighed softly in irritation and slipped on his coat, he’d get his clothes cleaned tomorrow.

 

Once he was dressed he looked over to Mira only to find her fast asleep where he left her, blankets tangled in a half-arsed attempted at pulling them over her. Rylen chuckled softly to himself, sorting out the blankets so that they covered her properly and made his way quietly out of her room and back to his.

 

**

 

The door closed as her moans rang out into the night. He could still see her, right there, in his mind. He knew he could open this door and watch those magnificent breasts heave and beg him for his touch. Watch as her neck arched beautifully, following along down to the freckles on her shoulders… and the muscles in her legs tense as she… as she…

… and she…

Was with someone else.

 

He turned away quickly, almost running all the way back to his tent.

 

_Cullen, you fool! You stupid fool._

 

Of course she wouldn’t want him, always so serious, so… broken. A washed-up excuse of a Templar, a man who followed orders until it broke a city, who wanted to annul the Ferelden Circle, who’d done so many horrible things under the guise of order and faith.

He wasn’t worthy of her, she was beautiful and fierce and even though she may deny it, she was as fiery as Andraste herself.

 

Whoever she had chosen was one lucky son of a bitch and he needed to put these selfish thoughts from his mind. Mira Trevelyan was her own woman, he had no right to think of her like he did. No damn right to… want her like he does.

_Cullen bloody Rutherford… you are a fool… a maker damned hopeless fool._

                                                                                  

 

**

Mira awoke the next morning with a startled groan as someone knocked at her door.

“Hey Tiger, Ruffles was looking for you again. Get up and out of bed there’s another meeting for you to attend.” Varric called through the door although the best reply she could give was a strangled groan back.

Her head was pounding again, her thighs sore and she might have actually pulled something in her calve but what was important was that she had fun. A lot of fun, that Rylen was rather good with his mouth.

 

“I’m serious Herald! It’s past mid-day you need to get up.” Varric continued, waiting patiently by the door for her to come out.

 

“Right, I’m coming.” She groaned again, forcing herself out of bed. Cleaning her mouth out with some leftover peppermint tea from last night before giving herself a quick wash with the metal basin and getting dressed. As she dressed she started to get flashes of last night, Rylen’s tattooed body caging her down into the bed, his mouth working at her clit… Cullen standing in the doorway? Wow, maybe she drank more than she thought?! There was no way that actually happened, I mean that’s just silly.

When she finally appeared dressed in her leathers and braiding her hair over her shoulder Varric gave her a concerned look.

 

“You alright Herald? Rough night?” he asked handing her a flask of water.

“You could say that but it had a surprisingly satisfying ending.” She smirked perversely before he started to lead her to where Josie was waiting for them.

“Herald there you are! We’ve been looking everywhere for you; the meeting is about to begin.” Josie greeted quickly as she ushered the Herald into the War room.

 

 

Both Leliana and Cullen were already inside both greeted her civilly, although Cullen couldn’t quite look her in the eye. _Odd._ The meeting went on quickly enough, Mira was only barely paying attention as it was more entertaining watching how Cullen would practically squirm every time he looked at her… _maybe she wasn’t as drunk as she thought last night? Oh Maker’s breath, he watched me and now he’s blushing!_ _Ohshitshitshitshit-_

“Having the Herald address the clerics is not a terrible idea.” Josephine started and Mira perked up at the mention of her title.

“You can’t be serious?” Cullen groaned with a bit more force than was necessary.

“Mother Giselle isn’t wrong, at the moment the Chantry’s only strength is that they are united in opinion.” Josie placated easily.

“And we should ignore the danger to the Herald.” Leliana asked keeping the conversation on the advisor’s side of the table.

 

“I hate Val Royeaux the food tastes like misery and despair.” Mira mumbled and Cassandra chuckled at the quiet comment.

 

“Let’s ask her.” Josephine grinned moving the opinion over to Mira.

“You want me to walk into a pit of vipers and you ask me that?” Mira whined.

“They’re not vipers just because they like to hiss.”

“I will go with her, Mother Giselle said she could provide us names, use them. Use what influence we have to call the clerics together, once they are ready we will see this through.” Cassandra spoke with that tone of finality she was quickly becoming known for in Mira’s eyes. _Want something done, go get Cassandra._

“Alright. I will get started then.” Leliana sighed, her mind turning through her list of contacts to see who would be useful. Mira was standing there watching Cullen still avoid her gaze, it was actually kind of amusing.

“If that was all, I’ll prepare the horses we’ll leave at first light.” Cassandra grunted in her usual manner before the meeting was adjourned and the group made their way out of the room.

 

“Cullen, could I have a moment?” Mira asked quietly just as he was about to leave.

Cullen paused with a look of both fear and confusion but he paused all the same allowing her to make her way over to him and lead him back to her cabin. Once inside Cullen couldn’t bear the quiet anymore and quickly had to think of something, anything to say.

“You know Val Royeaux isn’t all that terrible, I’ve heard their deserts are quite nice.” He spoke trying to break the silence. For his effort, he was awarded one of Mira’s smiles, Maker her smiles never failed to make his day just a little bit brighter, he could practically feel all the worries he had last night melt from his chest.

“Oh, well I’ll have to try some…. Uhmm Cullen, I don’t quite know how to ask you this but, Uh, where you in my room last night?” Mira asked with a slight tinge to her cheeks as she gestured for him to sit across from her in the spare chair.

 

Cullen did as she requested, sitting down uncomfortably before answering. The fear had solidified again, making his shoulders and neck ache with how tightly he was holding himself.

“I ah… Yes, my lady, I heard the noise and I thought you might be in trouble. I apologise, I did not mean to intrude.” Cullen spoke with his head bowed in repentance and Mira was quiet for a while, contemplating her next move.

 

“Well?” she asked, Cullen looked up quickly trying to gain some further understanding from her expression but utterly failed when she wasn’t looking at him.

“I'm sorry?”

 

“Well, what did you think? Did you enjoy the view _Cullen_?” she goaded drawing out his name on a purr. Immediately Cullen flushed once again and stammered for a response, the images from last night flashing in his mind, replacing the gaps he had in his dreams. _Her pale freckled shoulders, her breasts arching in the air looking so soft, so lovely to touch, to tease, to kiss and her face, oh how it twisted with pleasure, pleasure which he wanted to make her feel._

 

“Mira! I –I hardly think that’s appropriate. I should- Maker, I should go, I’ve got work to do.” Cullen moved quickly, trying to use any excuse to flee, to escape and most importantly not answer her question.

Mira moved quickly, faster than he had seen her move on the field the other day as she grabbed his wrist and forced him to look at her. She sighed softly, throwing him an apologetic look.

 

“I have nightmares… a lot of nightmares… and I found that the only way I’ll get back to sleep afterwards is with drink, and sometimes a warm and willing body.” Mira confessed stiffly, she made no apologies, just explained… And Cullen understood all too well.

 

“I’ll have to try that next time. Well maybe not the warm body part, my nightmares are a-uh little bit harder to describe, besides I’m not very good at uh wooing the uh, _ladies_ , anyway.” Cullen replied with a soft yet deprecating smile.

“I don’t know; I think you do a decent job of it.” She smiled back with a tease and a flirtatious glint in her eye, “Maybe next time our nightmares wake us we could have a drink, together?” she offered, the teasing tone gone from her voice as it now held something hopeful, friendly even.

“I think I’ll like that, better than wandering the Chantry and finding you in awkward positions.” He smirked with a tease of his own and Mira paused in surprise before grinning back cheekily.

“Oh, you know you like it.”

A quiet settled over the pair, comfortable... almost as if they were  _friends._

"Mira? Can I ask just one question?" Cullen started,  _Maker he was going to kick himself later, he knew it._

She nodded, her hands resting on her knee as she looked up at him.

"The man  _uh_ gentleman, you were with... is it- is it serious?" 

 

He waited in mild terror as she thought about her response, what he didn't know is that she was watching his reactions just as closely, gauging his response, his emotions.

"No, it's not serious. Why are you so interested Commander? Do you enjoy gossiping like washing ladies? Or is it something else?" she replied, carefully hiding her smirk,  _she was teasing him, poking him for a reaction._

"Mira! I wasn't- It's just- I. Do. Not.  _Gossip!"_ He squawked back in surprise. To many alarming thoughts just ran through his head.  _She's on to him._

A bright gasping laugh broke his thoughts as he whipped his head around to stare at her. She was laughing at him!

"Sorry, that was mean. I was only teasing Cullen." She giggled freely.  _Maker if she was onto him, it was worth it for her smile._

"I'm sorry. Forgive me?" she asked sweetly, she gently stroked the back of his hand in the effort to be forgiven.

 

 

Cullen just chuckled at her antics, “Very well Mira, I forgive you. I’ll see you later? I do really have work to be getting to.”

Mira nodded with another pleased smile and let him go. If she had read that conversation well enough, her evenings were going to be getting a whole lot more interesting very soon.

 

**

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did say the romantic/sexy bits follow the tags.
> 
> Rylen does not get enough love. As a fellow Scot, please give me more Rylen in DA4! or you know better yet, Some more Rylen smut.


	6. Tavernish Interludes (NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mira runs into an old friend and then travels (A LOT!). 
> 
> (Also NSFW content, cause you know what else do you do in taverns?)

 

Chapter 6. – Tavernish Interludes 

 

“Hey Mira, I just got word from a contact of mine. There’s someone who I think you should meet, can I steal you away from all this glitz and glam for a while?” Varric asked casually, It was just past noon in Val Royeaux and they weren’t due to meet their contact until after nightfall.

“Sure, all this glitz and glam has nothing on you and Bianca anyway.” Mira teased lightly.

“Mira, you can keep buttering me up with shameless flattery all you like, you’re still not going to play with my girl.” He teased right back, gesturing for her to follow him.

He lead her through the streets of Val Royeaux and down into the alley ways, straight into what the respectable section of the city classed as the red-light district.

“Varric are you leading me to a sexy toy shop, cause if you are you better have your coin purse on you! I’ve always wanted a sugar daddy.”

“Well with who we’re going to meet, sexy toy shops are never out of the question with her.”

Curiously Varric didn’t lead her to any sexy shop _much to Mira’s disappointment_. However, he did lead her to this small hat shop, laden with distinctive style of hats, feathers, threads, and fabrics.

 

“Varric, your contact is in a hat shop?” Mira asked in confusion.

“Every Captain needs a good hat kitten. One for every day of the week even!” Came this familiar sultry voice.

 

Mira turned suddenly, hoping against hope that it was who she thought it was.

“Isabella.” She breathed in shock, it took a few seconds for her to figure out the rush of overwhelming emotions that took her. “Isabella!” she said again, this time in excitement as Mira came barrelling over to envelop the other woman in a friendly hug.

“Hello Kitten, you got taller!” Isabella laughed as Mira practically knocked her off her feet.

“It is so good to see you! You won’t believe half the shit that’s happened! Oh Maker, it’s good to see a friendly face.” Mira rattled off quickly, Varric had at this point blended in with the background to let the two ladies talk.

“I came as soon as Varric mentioned it was you… I’m sorry to hear about your husband, from your letters it sounded like you finally settled.”

“Thanks, I think I had settled for a while but you know me. Restless as ever and now I’m here! Herald to the Inquisition!”

“I know! My little Kitten, all grown up. Varric said you went by ‘ _The Lioness’_ as your title, you’re as cute as ever.” Isabella teased softly.

“Isabella, I am not cute.” Mira laughed with mock spite as the two turned back to Varric who was perusing the hats.

“Well not in these drab, hand-me down clothes, come on I bet I can find something that’ll make all the boys swoon.” Isabella smirked much to Varric’s obvious eye roll.

“Now that I’ve re-introduced you two, I think me and Bianca will go and get a drink. I’ll meet you back at the inn Herald!” he sighed teasingly as he left the two alone to shop.

 

 

With that, Isabella whisked Mira away to her favourite seamstress who happened to double up as a rather good armourer. The pair of gossiped and reminisced, and of course, drank wine as the woman worked. Mira learnt that Isabella had gone back to the Raiders, but was now leading them as Admiral Isabella. As a friend, she offered the services of her Captains if the Inquisition ever needed them.

By the time the pair were finished talking and drinking the seamstress shuffled them into the main sitting room and started issuing orders to her staff like a pirate captain, secretly that where Mira thought Isabella found her.

“Ladies, it’ll take me a day or two to finish that armour for ya love. But in the meantime, wear these.” The seamstress spoke, although in a slightly kinder manner than she did to the staff, as she ushered Mira behind a screen to dress.

What lay there waiting was stunning. Supple chestnut brown leather pants, a loose cream silk shirt and a dark blue captains coat… that looked suspiciously like something Isabella might wear. The coat itself was detailed with gold thread and had a black lining that hid many pockets for potions and weapons.

 

The moment she rounded the screen, Isabella let out a low appreciative whistle.

 

“Now that’s something that’ll set tongue wagging. Look that coat even brings out your eyes… hmm it’s just missing one thing though…” she frowned, suddenly turning around and talking to the seamstress in Riviani so quickly that Mira didn’t have to time to translate, she just watched in fascination as the two women searched the store until Isabella pulled out this black corset with a triumphant shout. Mira stood there gratefully as she let Isabella strap her into the steel-boned contraption.

“There! Now it’s perfect!” she proclaimed loudly,

Mira laughed as she looked down, well, tried to look down. There was a certain amount of cleavage blocking her view but she trusted her friend.

“Enough to make tongues wag?”

“And then some.” Isabella cackled. The pair paid the seamstress for Mira’s new wardrobe, smirking as she noted that Isabella put a few extra _necessities_ on the list that would be delivered to Haven, while the seamstress would keep her measurements on record if she wanted to order anything else.

 

The pair then spent the rest of the day drinking and merry making, eventually making their way back round to the inn the Inquisition was staying at and continuing the party there.

Mira awoke in the morning, hungover and severely de-hydrated to a letter on the pillow next to her.

 

_“Dearest Mira._

_I do so hate goodbyes, that's why I’ve left you this note. With any luck by the time you read this I’ll already be aboard the Siren’s Call II sailing for Denerim._

_You’ve done a lot since I saw you last, grown a lot to. I can still see that scrawny kid that landed her way onto my ship and into my crew, that kid who just won’t quit. Whatever problem you've_ _landed in this time, I know you’ll find a way around it. Cause you’re a fighter Mira, you’ve got what it takes to change this world and leave it shaking in your wake and with your new title you’ll probably manage that to!_

_But try not to focus too hard on the big problems, look after yourself, alright?_

_If there was one thing I learnt hanging around with Hawke all those years is that, even when the world is burning around you, you can still find love and family in the people around you._

_Just keep that in mind._

_Also, I left something for you to remember me by, I tied it round the bed post._

_Yours_

_Admiral Isabella of the Siren’s Call II.”_

 

With that Mira folded the letter in her hand before glancing up to see what was left for her. A scarf, a dark blue scarf pattered with the traditional Riviani Paisley design.

Mira smiled softly before tying the scarf into her hair and preparing herself for the long trip back to Haven.

**

 

They took the long way back to Haven, their little stunt they pulled with the Grand Clerics had drawn the attention of a few interesting players. A player in the Orlesian court, Madam de Fer or Vivienne, a mage of icey disposition. A rouge, Sera, whose humour, and energy were highly entertaining and welcome to Mira with how dreary everyone was being.

Then there was the Iron Bull, a messenger bumped into them on the road back to Haven which turned out to be the lieutenant to the Chargers Mercenary company and guided them back to the Storm Coast so that they could watch the company work and ultimately hire them onto the Inquisition.

Even then when the party was finally back on the road to Haven they were intercepted by another messenger, this time in the form of one of Leliana’s birds informing them of a Grey Warden wandering the Hinterlands and wanted them to inquire about the whereabouts of the rest of the order and the possibility of them being involved in the death of the Divine and the explosion at the Temple of Sacred Ashes.

What they found was a gruff, practical man who offered his services with a dry humour and stubbornness which made Mira accept.

Finally, after what seemed like months on the road they made it back to Haven.

 

 

“Herald it’s good that you’ve returned, we heard of your encounter.” Josephine greeted with a small albeit worried smile.

“You heard?” Cassandra asked quickening her stride to walk next to Mira, the pair had grown closer over the course of the past few months. Going from Jailer and Prisoner to somewhat palatable friends. Mira was hesitant to get into anything involving the Chantry and Cassandra frowned upon her late-night revelries and sleeping with some of the soldiers. But the pair worked together, joked together and even bled together and among those trials they had begun to understand one another.

“My agents in the city sent word ahead, of course.” Leliana greeted.

“It’s a shame the Templars have abandoned their senses as well as the Capital.” Cullen sighed, you could see it as plain as day on his face, those wheels were turning in his mind, evaluating the situation, the risks, and rewards of what to do next.

“Oh, you know it was a fun day out all in all, got screamed at by both the Chantry mothers and that self-absorbed prick who calls himself Lord Seeker. But on the Brightside at least we made contact.” Mira sighed, trying to make her usual joke out a situation.

“Yes, and we have the opening we need to approach the Templars and the Mages.” Josie mediated, sensing Mira’s frustrations.

“Do we? Lord Seeker Lucius is not the man I remember.”

“True. He has taken the order somewhere, but to do what? My reports have been… Very odd.” Leliana sighed, she knew something, she always did.

 

“We must look into it. I’m certain not everyone in the order will support the Lord Seeker.” Cullen weighed in, it was painfully obvious as to where he thought they should go.

“Or the Herald could simply go to meet the Mages in Redcliffe. Instead.” Josephine backed.

“You think the Mage rebellion is more united? It could be ten times worse!” Cullen rounded on the group putting voice to his fears but he remained calm.

“Or we could stop bickering and make a decision.” Mira sighed, she knew what she wanted to do but she needed more information before backing her idea.

“I agree.”  Cassandra nodded.

“We shouldn’t discount Redcliffe. The Mages may be worth the risk.”

 

“They are powerful. Ambassador, but more desperate than you realise.” Cass debated.

“So it’ll be dangerous, I’ve been in danger since before I stepped out the Fade.” Mira chuckled without mirth.

“If some among the rebel mages were responsible for what happened at the conclave…”

“The same could be said about the Templars.”

“True enough. Right now, I’m not certain we have enough influence to approach the Order safely.” Cullen added, again putting his position on display. “Then the Inquisition needs influence in more places. That’s something you can help with.”

“In the meantime, we should consider other options.”

 

The group disbanded quickly, leaving a rather confused Mira rubbing the back of her head. Maker she could use a drink right now… or several.

But right now, Mira needed to see someone.  Namely a certain blacksmith about arranging some new daggers.

**

 

 

The trip to Redcliff was… eventful to say the least. Weird ass bloody rifts appearing at the gate for a start and then apparently, nobody knew they were coming? Even though the Grand Enchanter had personally invited them. Rylen was the one to meet them at the gate having been sent into the Hinterlands to oversee the gathering of resources and do some trade with the townsfolk.

 

“Herald, the mages say because it’s late they’ll meet with you tomorrow at noon so I’ve managed to secure some rooms in the tavern for you and your crew. Although some of you might have to pair up, there are a lot of refugees here.” Rylen spoke as he escorted them into town. Although it was late there were still many people out, mages and locals still trading for their evening meals, tents were being put up in any available spaces and blankets were being passed out by the Chantry.

“How many rooms did you get?” Sera pipped up as they walked past the statue for the Hero of Ferelden.

“Four but I’ve got my team jammed into one of them already. They’ve already passed out but I can move them if you wish, your worship.”

“Rylen, I told you to call me Mira, all this ‘your worship’ stuff gets really creepy after a while.”

“Yeah that’s ‘cause you aint got nobody worshipping your lady bits.” Sera giggled

“As you say Mira.” Rylen spoke flashing Sera a cheeky grin.

 

“Alright, so four rooms. Your boys are in one, Bull you can get one all to yourself because you snore like a Druffalo. Sera and Blackwall could be so kind as to share a room and I’ll bunk with the Knight-Captain.” Mira grinned issuing out the decisions.

“Sure, thing your lady bits.” Sera snickered as the rest of her group entered the tavern.

“Would you like me to have a meal brought up the room Mira?” Rylen asked as the others went by.

Mira looked at with a slightly curiously look, Rylen was handsome, charming, good for a laugh and he had this wondrous voice.

“Maybe later but first there are something I’d like to do with you that involves _way_ less clothing.” She smirked making her offer. Rylen paused seeming to be surprised again by her interest in him before he grinned back.

“Then after you, My lady.” He smirked holding the door open for her and then taking her arm as he led her up to their room.

**

 

 

Even though the offer was made they decided to start with dinner and a few quiet drinks, conversation was easy between the pair as they lounged against each other on the small settee, armour off, legs tangled over each other as Rylen flicked through a dirty book he found near the dresser.

 

“Listen to this bit. _‘The young woman quivered in wanton desire as he approached, “Serah, we shouldn’t, not out here were everyone can hear us?”. “Ah but what if I wanted everyone to hear you wailing my name?”. “Serah! You are depraved! Take me now.”_ Rylen read out loud, doing his best womanly voice to win Mira’s laughter.

“What? Really? It says that? _That’s_ depraved? What book is this?” Mira asked through her giggled, she pulled herself up from her reclined position to inspect the book, only for Rylen to pull it further away.

_“Don pulled at the front of her dress, ripping it off in one sharp tug. -“_

“Well, that’s impractical!” Mira interrupted.

_“- leaving her bare in the maker’s light, his eyes wandered her body, scorching her in their wake until they came to rest upon her lady garden-”_ Rylen purred in that irresistible brogue.

“Maker’s breath, lady garden! Are you kidding me?” she giggled.

 

“- shhh, let me finish _! ‘he swiftly entered her, sliding his sword into her sheath with the ferocity of a great warrior of old. ‘Oh, my love, I’m so close!’ She cried out.”_

“How did he do that? Was he naked the whole time? And she’s that close after the first penetration, wow, what I wouldn’t give for that skill!”

“ _He came soon after, deep within her quivering quim. “Oh, my love, you are tighter than a Antivan moneylender_.”-  And that was when the book got knocked out of Rylen’s hand. The pair quickly broke down into giggles at the terrible smut he had read for her. His voice, deep and rough mixed with that glorious Starkhaven accent.

 

“That is terrible! Quivering quim? Oh, maker’s breath.” She laughed as she let him pull her over his lap.

“I know, but it was funny. Now do you think there’s a chance you’ll let me into your quivering quim?” he purred resting his broad hands over her hips.

“You’re a cheeky git you know that?” she told him smacking his shoulder softly before leaning forwards to kiss him, moaning in appreciation of the cider he drank after dinner.

“I know, but you keep me around anyway.” He chuckled kissing her this time. He pulled her flush against him as he ravaged her mouth.

 

 

Rylen’s kisses were like the man himself, honest, passionate with a hint of something rougher and Mira loved it. Everybody she’d met was hesitant to even look at her now that she’s been named _‘Herald of Andraste_ ’ But Rylen, Rylen was a clever man, he could see who she really was behind that title. A woman who enjoyed getting into trouble, who lusted after physical pleasures, a Pirate, a Rouge with a rebellious streak a mile wide.

Mira broke away from his kiss with a grin, “Why don’t we move this to the bed? I want to ride your cock till I cum.” She purred lustfully, her fingers tugging slightly in his shaggy brown hair.

“Oh, is that all?” he chuckled back as he lifted her, “Well I’ll have you know I am a gentleman and I require at least _some_ foreplay, we don’t have to go leaping for the clitoris like a Druffalo at a gate.” He smirked exaggerating his voice with a teasing tone as he carried her over towards the bed.

“Well I wasn’t going to say it like that. I would have added some cock sucking somewhere in there as well.” She giggled flopping on the bed in a mass of red hair and laughter.

“Well that’s settled then!” he laughed back, prowling over her like some looming beast. It made her giggle, swiping her hair back over her shoulder before she reached up to wrap her hands around his shoulder, pulling him down towards her lips.

 

 

“Mira, Mira, mmm-Mira,” Rylen chuckled, although the last one was muffled by her lips, “You sexy minx. You are-“ his praises were being pressed into her skin.

“Keep sweet talking and I might just take over.” She huffed, throwing her head back against the pillows.

 

“Uhuh? And how would you do that when I’m – Whoa!” While Rylen smirked in his victory above her, Mira had raised her thighs around his hips, bringing him closer to her before she moved with lighting fast reflexes and flipped them over to have her on top instead.

It was her turn to smirk as she slipped the scarf off from around her neck and managed to skilfully tie both his hands to the bed frame above him.

 

“Well fuck, I didn’t think you could do that… or this?” he chuckled, tugging on his wrists experimentally. Mira was sat over his hips at this point, the perfect vantage point apart from their over clothed state.

“Too much?” she asked cautiously, she knew they were good for sex but maybe this was a bit much for him.

Rylen just laughed from underneath her, bucking his hips slightly against her as a tease.

“You’re perfect, maybe could have waited until I took my shirt off though.” He mused with a smirk.

 

Mira had to smile a bit at that, she leaned down over him, pressing her still clothed chest into his as she stretched out like a languid cat.

“Mmmm, all these muscles sure are comfy, and it’s been such a long day. Maybe I should just, mmm stay here?” she moaned out breathily into his ear as she splayed out over him.

 

“Mira.” He huffed, he was amused now but she gave no reaction, “Mira? Come on Mira.”

Still no difference, he could feel her smiling against his shoulder, a smug smile no doubt.

“Miiiraaa-“ he groaned out, “Nothing? Maferath’s beard Mira, when I get out of this restraint I’m gonna, I’m gonna – _fuck-“_ he growled, tugging at the scarf around his wrist with a renewed effort.

 

 

He felt her giggle against him, her laughter rumbling against his chest like it was his own.

 

 

“You’re gonna what?” she provoked leaning up to reveal a large grin on her face, _definitely smug._

“Do something back!” he snapped, pulling on his wrists, and rattling the bed frame.

“Uhuh,” she questioned, almost thoughtfully as she walked her fingers down his chest as she settled over his lap once more.

“And how are you going to do that? When I have you, right where I want you.” Came the lusty purr that sent Rylen’s protests to a stuttering stop.

 

She sat astride him like a Queen, her hands now on his belt as she watched him. Blue eyes hooded and showing off the dark kohl that had smudged through her travels, but that look she was giving him. Maker, like he was her subject, her possession, he existed solely at that moment for what she would do next.

Clever fingers undid the belt and ties holding his trousers up and slowly peeled them down his legs. She smirked when she got them to his knees, her eyes following the line of his hardening cock upwards to his face.

Her smirk was followed by a coy wink as she turned around, bending so her still covered ass was on display for him, as she pulled his trousers off the rest of the way.

“Mira, you’re going to be the death of me.” He groaned, trying to lean forwards. _He needed to touch her._

 

“Mmhmm.” She agreed as she turned back around, this time avoiding the now straining cock to slowly unbutton his shirt. _Praise Andraste and the Maker above that he took his armour off._

Fingers drifted up his chest as his shirt was slowly parted from the bottom up, her lips leaning down to lay soft breathy kisses up his sternum. The shirt finally parted, her hands slid into his messy brown hair as she guided his mouth to hers.

Quickly he slid his tongue into her mouth, prodding, bullying, suckling her lips, turning what she meant to be a gentle kiss into something needy and desperate. Because he was, desperate. He needed her touch, her body, her moans more than he needed any sense of dignity right now.

She chuckled, deep and sensual, as she pulled back from him.

“Nooooo. Don’t, wait, argh come back.” He groaned, craning his neck for her as she kept up her retreat, crawling backwards off his body to the foot of the bed, laughing as she stood triumphantly.

“Relax Rylen.” Mira giggled again, Maker she was enjoying this. He was splayed out, bare and desperate for her. The tattoos that started on his face travelled down his neck to his shoulders, small arrows tapering off towards his arms.

“Can’t bloody relax when my cock is this bloody hard!” he growled low, the accent wrapping itself heavily around each syllable.

“Hush, just watch.” She cooed back, much to his continued annoyance.

 

Mira’s laughter floated around the room as she stood there watching him struggle before finally, _finally_ , started to pull her shirt off over her head. Rylen’s eyes were glued to her and the tattered breast band that Mira wore while traveling (The most comfortable one she owned!) and then the way she grinned devilishly as she threw it at him, only to have it land by his head.

 

“Do I have your attention?” she asked lightly, her hands not stopping their work as she peeled off her leggings, taking her knickers along with them. She only got a panting grunt in response.

“All of your attention?” came the smirk as she pushed out her hip to rest her hand on it. She took her time to look at him, drink in the image of the bound and delicious soldier on her bed… well a bed.

“Ah- _fuck_ , for the love of the Maker Mira, just sit on my face!” Rylen almost shouted as he threw his head back into the pillows desperately.

_Oh maker, Mira was enjoying this…_

“Well, if you think about it, shouldn’t it be, for the love of the _Herald_? Not the Maker?” she teased, slowly walking to the base of the bed.

“Mi-raaa, I will rip your pretty scarf in a second! Please, please touch me.” He now resorted to threats and begging.

_Fuck that’s hot._

 

“Now now, there’s no need to do a thing like that Rylen. Besides, only good soldiers get their cocks sucked in my bed. Are you a good soldier Rylen?” she asked, bending down to crawl onto the bed.

“Yes, yes, oh maker yes.” He panted, maker he felt like he was burning up from the inside out, like one touch from her and he would ignite.

“Say it for me now.”

“REALLY MIRA!” Rylen shouted, very loudly she might add! Which in turn caused Mira to let out a peel of laughter that had either Blackwall or Sera banging on the wall next door.

 

Maker, she couldn’t stop! Her giggles continued as she sat, now curled over between his legs with her hands covering her mouth, trying to smother her laughter while Rylen just watched her in disbelief.

 

“I’m sorry, so sorry,” she chuckled, leaning down with a big ol’ smirk as she kissed his thighs in apology, “Here, I’ll make it up to you.”

It was with that last purred whisper that Mira ran her tongue up the entire length of Rylen’s cock, causing the poor man to groan out. She hummed in delight as she went to work, trailing soft kisses along his length, flicking his tongue around its head, all the while causing the poor man under her to slowly lose his mind.

 

“Mira. Mira please. Enough teasing, I won’t- I won’t last much longer.” He begged, he was hot, sweating at the strain of holding back. The Herald of Andraste was sucking his cock, oh Maker strike him down, she is so fucking _fuuuck._

 

She let his cock go with a loud pop, her eyes meeting his over his throbbing cock… she looked like sin, like the sort of desire demons they warned you about when you were a recruit. He watched in awe as she crawled up his body, laying soft kisses and teasing bites along his chest, suckling on one of his nipples to make him groan in pleasure before she moved her knees to either side of his hips.

 

“Is this what you want Rylen?” she asked teasingly, holding herself above his cock, moving away every time he tried to buck up into her.

“Stop doing that, Mira I swear to the bloody Maker when I get out of this fucking scarf I’m going to- ah fuuuck.” Mira laughed as his threats cut short as she slid down onto his cock.

She laughed as he lost the words he was going to say and started to ride him, snapping her hips along his length as he tried to work his thrusts to her rhythm.

 

“That’s it Rylen, fuck me, fuck me as I’m fucking you.” She growled, leaning over him to press a rough kiss to his lips.

He grunted and growled back, too far gone from all her teasing to think of a response. Her moans were music to his ears, she praised his cock, his body and just as he was starting to lose all control, she slowed down, almost to a stop.

Her fingers dipped into his slackened mouth as she wetted them with his saliva before slipping them over her clit and rubbing herself towards an orgasm.  He could feel her walls twitching around his length, she was hot and so wet.

He needed more, he couldn’t cum like this!

He tried rocking his hips back up into her only to be met with the same infernal teasing as before as she raised herself up just hold the head of his cock inside her while she continued to work herself.

She was flushed, her cheeks a delectable pink, eyes scrunched closed and her hair, the red braid spilled down her back as she arched on the brink of ecstasy.

 

*RIP*

 

Her eyes snapped open at sound, only to have a very desperate, very strong man flood her vision as he reached out to grab her. His hands fitting over her waist tightly as he pulled her down, rolling them so she was underneath him.

“Rylen! My sca- Ahh!” she yelped as he yanked her legs wide, pulling them over his hips as he slid inside her.

 

He pounded her with every ounce of strength he had in him. His shirt still clung to him so Mira tore it from him, fucking herself back onto his cock when he paused from surprise. Her hands pulled in his hair, tugging him down to meet her lips in a rough kiss. They moaned together, pleasure spiking rapidly, his fingers dug bruises along her hips as he practically pulled her onto his cock, slamming them both together in a rough, heady rhythm.

Words were lost between the heat of their bodies, the steady rhythm and beat. They were both close. Rylen was trying desperately to hold back, to not relive the same quick finish he had last time they were together. It didn’t matter that she had the body of a desire demon or that her voice would drop into a smoky purr whenever he did something she liked, she was the Herald of Andraste and he _will_ make her come.

Her rhythm faltered, her breasts arched towards him as her fingers dug into his shoulders. _There it was_. Her orgasm sparked from her like nothing he’d ever seen, she was magnificent, otherworldly, a fiery goddess sent from the Maker himself.

He was beyond desperate now, he pulled from her warmth quickly, fisting himself just above her stomach, one of her legs trapped under his arm as he came with a roar, splashing hot come onto Mira’s panting chest.

They were both panting raggedly. Rylen had the brief notion to open his eyes from where he screwed them shut before he collapsed. There she was, the Herald of Andraste, sated and satisfied… and marked with his seed.

 

“Ah, sorry about the mess.” He muttered with a blush, quickly rummaging around for something to clean her with.

Mira just smiled, brushing his hand away to run her finger across her breast, through his come, and bring it to her mouth.

“Mmm it’s been a long time since I’ve enjoyed this.” She smiled, talking quietly.

 

Slowly she cleaned up most of his mess, Rylen just watched her dumbfounded. What did he do to deserve laying with such a wonderful creature? Eventually she sat up towards him, running her fingers through her tangled hair, he brushed a kiss to her temple before she got up with a stretch.

 

“What did you mean?” he asked thoughtfully, did she mean it had been a long time, or that she hadn’t enjoyed her last?

“I uh, I’d rather not go into detail.” She told him, kinda awkwardly actually as she had damp cloth cleaning up her nethers at the time.

“Ah, I didn’t mean to pry. I guess I owe you a new scarf though.” He smiled, brushing the topic aside to hold up the two sections of scarf he ripped through to touch her.

“Oh, that you do! You owe me a good one too, that was a gift!” she laughed, coming back to the bed as he arranged the blankets.

“Mira, I will buy you all the scarves I can carry from Val Royeaux.” He smirked, pulling her close to make her giggle.

 

She turned into him, to cover his cheeks with light pecks,

“Good night Rylen.” She giggled with one last peck, as she rolled over to press her back to his chest.

“Goodnight Mira.” He smiled, quietly sending his thanks to Andraste for her Herald as he protected her by slinging his arms around her.

 

Spooning the Herald of Andraste, Maker knows this was never something he expected to do with his life.

 

 

**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had to include Rylen reading, in that lovely voice of his.
> 
> Also, we will get to Mira's past in more detail... eventually. 
> 
> did anyone pick up the Monty Python reference?


	7. Picking sides

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cullen and Mira have an argument, Mira yells a lot.

Chapter 7 –  Picking sides

 

 

The discussion about who to side with went much… much better in Mira’s head. After yet another long trip to the Hinterlands and even into Redcliffe itself, which ended with a delightfully rambunctious night with Rylen in the Tavern, she’d finally made it back to Haven.

But now she was back and yet again she was staring down the War council.

 

“We don’t have the manpower to take the castle, either we find another way in or we give up this nonsense and go get the Templars.” Cullen growled, Mira wasn’t sure if he was looking at this from a military standpoint or just as a stupid stubborn Templar.

“Redcliffe is in the hands of a Magister. This cannot be allowed to stand.” Cassandra defended, she had been against going to the mages in the beginning but after seeing the time distorted rifts at Redcliffe had decided that they at least needed to be stopped.

“The letter from Alexius asked for the Herald of Andraste by name. It’s an obvious trap!” Josie added from behind her clipboard.

“Isn’t that kind of him, what did Alexius say about me?” Mira grinned, ignoring Cullen’s pointed eye roll.

“He’s so complimentary that we are certain he wants to kill you.” Leliana grinned adding in her own morbid humour. There was a tired mutter of _Not this again_ from Josephine’s side of the table.

 

 

“Redcliffe Castle is one of the most defensible fortresses in Ferelden. It has repelled thousands of assaults. If you go in there you’ll die and we’ll lose the only means, we have of closing these rifts, I won’t allow it!” Cullen growled, he was clutching his pommel again, his eye’s boring into Mira trying to make her understand by sheer force of will.

 

She bristled at that, raising one finger up at him, “ _You won’t allow it?_ Who are you to tell me what to do?” she snarled.

“The Commander of this army and the man in charge of keeping everyone safe! I can’t do that when you intentionally head into a slaughter house!” he snarled right back.

 

There was a pause in the air, both Mira and Cullen facing off against each other in a battle of wills, one in which Leliana tactfully interrupted.

“And if we don’t even try to meet Alexius we lose the Mages and leave a hostile foreign power on our doorstep!”

“Even if we could assault the keep, it would be for naught! An Orlesian’s Inquisitions army marching into Ferelden will provoke a war. Our hands are tied!”

“The Magister- “Cass started.

“Has outplayed us.” Cullen answered with finality, still staring down at Mira.

 

Mira glared at him for a few seconds, trying to wrack her brain over a solution. He was being an arse, an arse who had the best intentions in mind… but still an arse.

 

“Where is the Arl of Redcliffe? I’m sure Tegan would help us get his castle back.” Mira offered.

“After he was displaced Arl Tegan rode straight for Denerim to petition the crown for help. I doubt he’ll want our assistance once the Ferelden army lays siege to the castle.” Josephine explained.

 

“Wait. There is a secret passage into the Castle an escape route for the family. It’s too narrow for troops but we could send agents through.”

“Too risky, those agents will be discovered well before they reach the Magister.” Cullen added turning to Leliana.

“That’s why we need a distraction, perhaps the envoy Alexius wants so badly.” She grinned, there was a solution here.

“Focus their attention on Trevelyan while we take out the Tevinter’s. It’s risky but it could work.” Cullen agreed finally.

 

 

There was a sudden breach in the room, the door behind Mira opening as that cocky Mage from Redcliffe entered the room.

“Fortunately, you’ll have help.” Dorian grinned as he entered the room with all the grace and restraint of a Male Peacock.

“This man says he has information about the Magister and his methods Commander.” The scout announced before closing the door behind him.

Cullen finally looked towards the intruding man and within a few seconds started to glare, obviously, he could sense the man’s magic… not that Dorian was particularly subtle about that anyway.

“Your spies will never get past Alexius’s magic without my help. So if you’re going after him, I’m coming along.” He announced with a cheeky grin. Cullen simply sighed in frustration.

 

 

“The plan puts you in the most danger. We can’t in good conscious order you to do this, we can still go after the Templars If you’d rather not play the bait, it’s up to you.” Cullen warned, there was just a hint of worry in his eyes something that years of ridged Templar training could never snuff out.

Mira accepted the plan and the room was quickly setting out preparations for the trip to Redcliffe but as soon as it was over it seemed Cullen wasn’t finished with her.

 

“Herald could we talk in private?” he asked quietly, still leaning over the table. _Shit, he only calls her by her title when he’s mad._

“How bout we head out into the hills, I promised Flissa that I’d get a few more rams for the stores. Care to accompany me?” she asked trying to prolong their _talk_.

 

 

Cullen agreed and with a quick stop at the armoury to pick up a pair of bows to hunt with the pair were off, on the trail heading out of camp.

 

“Herald I don’t like this idea.” Cullen started.

“Which idea would that be Commander?” Mira parroted his title back at him as they walked.

“Going to the Mages for help, we don’t know how desperate they are. We don’t know how powerful the Magister is, there is just too many things that could go wrong.” Cullen sighed.

“The same could be said about the Templars, how many of them are corrupt after their own gain? How many will cling to their beliefs and what do you think they will do once they see a heretical Inquisition!” Mira growled back, she could hear Cullen’s footsteps getting heavier as he was trying to control his temper.

 

“We know the Mages are scared! How many could be abominations or possessed!” Cullen shouted now raising his voice along with his temper.

“And how many Templars could be paid off to MURDER INNOCENT PEOPLE IN THEIR HOMES!” Mira turned on him, furious! She had accepted that he obviously had a need to defend his past brothers and sisters, but not now. Not after everything that’s happened.

Cullen paused for a moment, clearly not expecting that kind of response but he wasn’t letting up.

 

“Herald cases like yours are few and far between, caused by low level extremist. Not the entire order.” Cullen tried to explain but Mira wasn’t having any of it. He felt the pain bloom across his jaw even before he saw her move to strike him.

 _“IT WAS THE FUCKING KNIGHT-CAPTAIN AND A GROUP OF 20 TEMPLARS,_ ON THE ORDERS OF THE FUCKING KNIGHT-COMMANDER OF OSTWICK!!” Mira screamed at him, rage flaring though her body, causing her anchor to spark when she went to strike him again, “You mean to tell me that the entire hierarchy of a city-state with connections all over the face of fucking Thedas, that have dogged me for almost ten fucking years, are  _Low level extremists_?”

 

Cullen was stunned stupid for a moment _10 years_ everything that had happened to her happened over a period of _10 years?!_ He stalled, but Mira was fuelled by rage.

“Those Templars murdered my husband, a Mage of good standing with the Queen, made me watch as they put the knife through his back as they… made me their whore.” She spat, anger and pain held high in her voice. And all Cullen could do was stare.

“ _Those Templars,_ raped me, kidnapped me, drugged me to keep me pliant, to make me their play thing! They subjugated me and for _what_?” came her hissed question, _Maker take him, there were tears shining in her eyes._

“Because they were fucking told to… and you want me to go to them now?” she sighed, slumping where she stood, all the anger drained from her like a bucket of water.

 

“The Knight Captain?! He should be brought to justice; they should all answer for their crimes! Did no one realise what was happening!?” Cullen gasped, his mind racing over what they did to her… Anger welled up inside him. _They raped her, hurt her… people from his order…_

 

Mira laughed, almost hysterically. “Don’t you think I’ve tried?! What’s easier to believe the word of one mage lover, a fragile woman of nobility or the word of the entire Templar command of Ostwick?! Besides there was no way of knowing who was on my father’s pay roll.”

“I- I didn’t know.” He replied feeling all the more stupid for trying to defend the order… maker he left because of their abuses did he really think that it was somehow limited to Kirkwall?

 

Mira had ignored him; she was halfway up the hill into the outskirts surrounding the town. In the distance, he could hear the twang of her bow and the cry of a fallen ram, followed quickly by two more.

He moved quickly and quietly towards her, trying not to scare off any potential rams for her. He needed to apologise to her, he hadn’t meant to bring up her obviously painful memories but she heard him coming and started to move again, quickly.

“Mira wait! I didn’t mean to- “

“Didn’t mean to what? Dismiss years of fucking torture at the hands of Templars because of what? Some sense of honour? Because if you try to tell me that, I’m more than capable of putting an arrow in you.” She growled and continued to move, but there was something there, some waver to her voice that reminded him of her earlier unshed tears.

“The only plan we have is the one serving you up as bait. I can’t protect you, what if Alexius decides to incinerate you or curse you or do something anything to harm you before we’re able to get into position. I am sorry for what I said, my comment was careless and harsh. I know full well what kind of horrors the Order has condoned but I just wanted to believe…  I wanted to believe that they were better than this, that people weren’t capable of doing the things they… I am so sorry Mira.”

 

He was trying to get through to her, he knew what he said right after he said it but they couldn’t lose her. _He couldn’t lose her,_ not when she meant so much to their cause.

“Of course, you’re sorry. Because you’re a good man, even if you are a great big, pig headed, honour bound, idiot of an ex-Templar.” She growled and continued to walk, there was a fat ram not meters away. “ _stupid Templar with his stupid face, and his stupid arms and stupid muscles and-stupid-hair-and-stupid-kissable-lips.”_ She was mumbling under her breath and Cullen was having a hard time keeping up, her focus was ahead of her but he could have sworn she said she wanted to kiss him.

 

Thwack.

The arrow had met yet another mark, that made 4 fat rams, enough for dinner tonight for the entire tavern if they were lucky.

“Nice shot. You’ve got excellent aim, I thought you preferred daggers?” Cullen asked trying to make conversation.

“When you’re starving with nowhere to go, you learn pretty quick how to make do, plus it’s sometimes easier to take your prey down from a distance than at close range.” She added simply as she turned towards him. All Cullen could see was the smudge of dirt on the corner of her mouth from where the bow had rested whilst she aimed.

“Mira, you uh have a little something.” He gestured to her cheek. She patted around for a few moments before grunting for assurance, “no here, let me.” He sighed, wetting his thumb slightly to rub the mark clean.

“You know… if you wanted to apologise there are always better ways to do it? You could, _distract me?_ ” she muttered just loud enough for him to hear.

 

He looked at her confused for a split second, that was before he glanced at her lips. He knew exactly what he wanted to do. Protect. Kiss. Consume.

“If you blush any harder Commander, I’m going to lose track of you amongst your coat.” She chuckled and suddenly she was closer… or he was closer he couldn’t remember.

“A-Are you suggesting? That I uh after everything I said? That you want me to- “

“Well, only if you’re agreeable to it… and yes, more so because you said that just now. Distract me Cullen.” she smiled slightly, her hands were in the fur of his coat. She was leaning in and by the Maker did Cullen want her, he fought with himself internally, he didn’t want to kiss her while she was angry with him, he wanted to kiss her because they were happy, because they could be happy together. But he was looking at her, the small smile that was on her lips (It wasn’t her true one and he knew it). But there was that teasing gleam in her eyes and he thought, for just once in his life, he could indulge.

 

He leaned in, slowly so she could pull away if she wanted to. Her hands curled into his coat, almost pulling him in, he could taste her breath on his lips, feel it as it puffed softly against him. “Are you sure?” he breathed ever so quietly, it was like he was dreaming _again._

She smiled, closing the gap between them with. His lips slid against hers, softly at first, he didn’t know how far or what she wanted from him but when he felt her moan just softly against his lips, he couldn’t help but slide a hand up along her jaw.

 

Her mouth opened as they kissed deepening their kiss as her hands slid along his neck to hold him and it was perfect. She was warm, strong and oh so sweet beneath him but she didn’t play coy like the women of Kirkwall, she was his equal in every sense of the term… perhaps even better than he, for wherever she should choose to lead him like this he could only beg to follow.

His hand was on her waist feeling the warmth of her through both his gloves and her coat, the taut curve of her hip as he dragged it up. Somehow, he had backed her up against the trunk of one of the many pine trees scattered around Haven. She moaned deeply at the new position, practically moulding herself into Cullen’s chest as the pair panted into a seemingly breathless kiss.

 

“Mira, I should- “Cullen started, pulling his lips away so they could catch their breath.

“Not stop, please.” Mira moaned again before seeking out his lips. Their kisses grew wilder, bolder as Cullen lost his sense of control. Her tongue plundered into his mouth like a pirates’ folly and it only seemed fitting that he return the gesture. Her fingers were as clever as the rest of her, seeking out the ties and buckles to his cuirass and letting it fall into the snow before he realised what she was doing.

Her hands ran over his chest like a fire spell, she was so warm, so alive and she was kissing him. If Cullen’s toes weren’t freezing right now, he would have sworn he had died and gone to the Makers side. Her hands trailed lower, along his hips and then suddenly she was cupping him, caressing his steadily thickening erection.

“Mira, don’t tease me like that. I beg you.” He whined grabbing her wrist and panting hard. They both paused to catch their breath and for Cullen to retrieve the pieces of his mind that he had swiftly thrown to the wind as soon as her lips touched his. How did this happen again? Weren’t they arguing?

 

 

“I- Oh, your breastplate!” Mira gasped, suddenly breaking the spell that had somehow been cast on the pair of them. She bent down quickly to retrieve it, bending dangerously close to Cullen’s barely contained erection in the process.

Mira handed back the plate and waited quietly while he re-attached it. They were both waiting, hoping the other would speak first.

“So I should-“

“I need to get-“

The both started at the same time, both pausing for the other to continue before breaking into awkward chuckles at the situation.

“I should head back to work.” Cullen spoke first, albeit slightly strained. He wasn’t going to be able to work in the state he was in right now, Maker he could barely think straight!

“Yes, that’s probably umm… could you send some men to come and collect the Rams? I’m going to hunt down a few more; I think I even saw some Druffalo the around here the other day. Tell them to bring a wagon, it’ll be easier.”

“Right, of course.” He rushed out, turning quickly to complete his order and try really hard to stop thinking about her lips.

**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So i did say we'd find out more about Mira's past, horrible past that it is, and she is dealing with it in the way she deals with everything. By you know, 'not' dealing with it.


	8. Fire and Death

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Redcliffe isn't a fun as Mira remembered.

 Chapter 8 - Fire and Death.

 

 

Redcliffe was definitely redder than Mira remembered.

“Blood of the elder one, how’d they get here?!” guards yelled as they came for her.  Maker she felt terrible, her head was splitting, it was like that hangover she had after she drank 3 bottles of fire whiskey.

The guards went down easily with a flourish from Dorian’s staff and a quick parry from Mira’s blades… Wait. Dorian was here to?

Mira squinted up towards her friendly Tevinter mage as he rambled out an explanation as to where or more importantly _When_ they were.

 

The pair tore through the castle, determined to find some means to escape, some way to get back to their time to stop all this from happening! Eventually they found Sera and Blackwall who were both convinced Mira was dead.

Red.                                                                                                                             

The whole place was swimming in red, even Sera and Blackwall oozed with it. Like vapours coming of a hot drink they were red. And then they found the Grand Enchanter. Maker it was horrible. The stench was like burning blood and the crystals, the Lyrium was growing out of her!

She told them that they had missed an entire year, a whole year in which because she _died_ the world had fallen apart. The Inquisition’s armies fell, their Commander Void bent on breaching this impenetrable castle. Their diplomat killed along with the entire court of Orlais when legions of demons fell across the nation. And because she had died, no one could close the rift and it was now swallowing the world.

Shit.

Fuck.

Oh, fuck it all to the Void!

She was angry, she was furious that this Elder one was trying to fuck everything up. She was angry because she had though that after the breach had been sealed that she would be free to live a _normal_ life! But no, just more death, darkness and despair! Couldn’t anything in her life be simple?

Rage was bubbling up inside her, but luckily enough demons were pouring out from every crack and hole in the wall, and with a squadron of Venatori between her and Alexius and she was happy enough to kill them all.

 

 

They weren’t even half way through the castle before she was covered in blood. Tevinter blood, demon blood, her own bloody blood! The party came across the main hall which was swarming with Venatori and even a few demons pouring out of a rift in the middle of the hall, but that wasn’t it… not even by half. There, standing, lumbering in the middle of the hall… this Behemoth of red Lyrium. It has the features of a human being, only with gigantic chunks of red Lyrium sticking out of its enlarged form.

It saw them, in-between all the madness, demons and mages. The beast saw them… and targeted them.

Mira’s stomach dropped, her fingers tightened around her blades as she moved to engage. “ _Blackwall! Draw it’s attention!”_ Mira yelled as she dropped into stealth.

Sera was picking off any demons or Venatori who got to close while Dorian littered the hall with dazzling lightning and ice spells. She tried to get around the beast, leapt into the air, her daggered held high aiming for a killing blow to the back of it’s supposed neck.

The blades sunk deep into its crystalized form and as she fell, she twisted them. Shattering a section of the red crystals off from its monstrous form revealing part of the creature underneath.

Brown hair.

Roughened tan skin.

Black, elongated tattoo leading down his nose…

… Rylen.

 

The creature turned and stared at her, the half of his face that was revealed to the world at least. His eye met hers, her stomach dropped to the floor, just as the beast turned and roared at her, swiping near her chest in what could have been a very dangerous attack.

Mira dodged and swerved, racking her brain for a way out of this one. How could this have happened! Rylen of all people, turned into this beast!

“Oi Sparkle arse freeze it! Get it to shatter!” Yelled Sera over the din of the battle.

Dorian attacked, focusing an ice mine underneath the behemoth, “Blackwall! Smash the beast, do a shield bash to shatter it!!” Mira yelled back, ducking again as Sera knocked off another chunk of its red Lyrium, listening to the beast’s skin crack.

 

The spell was complete, the creature frosted over its skin cracking before shattering as Blackwall slammed his shield into it causing the beast, causing Rylen to scream out in pain. Mira ran for the opening, the Lyrium falling in chunks as the beast shed its skin. Her blades ready, her steps sure before she leapt high, propelling herself into the air to use the extra force and bring her daggers down into the beasts exposed neck.

Her blades sunk deep as Rylen groaned, a quiet cut off thing. His eyes met hers and for a moment, just for a moment he saw her… recognised her for the one moment when he stopped struggling, his mouth started to form her name as surprise flashed across his eyes before settling into sadness as the light started to leave his eyes… she fell with him, her blades stuck to deep into the ex-Templar flesh. He fell forwards, narrowly missing her as the beast turned to fall on his side as it died.

Mira groaned as she landed with the beast... Rylen, of all people turned into that thing ... She couldn't quite wrap her head around it as she pulled her blades from him.

 

"You know him Red?" Sera asked using a nickname to lighten the mood.

"We were sleeping together back in our time... he's Cullen's second in command." Mira spoke quietly. The battle was over, there was only one more door to get through to face Alexius but Mira froze.

She was bubbling with rage. just what did Alexius do while she was gone. Blackwall answered.

 

"High ranking soldiers were targeted by the Venatori, captured and forced to ingest Red Lyrium and eventually they would turn into this. He was brought in recently, just after they killed Commander Cullen." 

“These bastards killed Cullen? How!” Mira snapped back at the warden much to the surprise of the rest of the party.

“Didn’t hear much, one last ditch effort on breaching the castle, Cullen and the last of the Inquisition their last stand on the offensive trying to reach this Elder one, to kill him… then Alexius just snapped his fingers and this demon army descended on them. They dragged the ranking officers to Alexius and one by one they were either turned or killed.” Blackwall explained cautiously, none one them had seen the Herald react like this before.

“Shit.” Mira hissed before finally put away her blades, storming forwards without another word, heading for the door they knew Alexius was behind.

After a few attempts to bash it down Dorian eventually figured out that the strange shard they picked up after the battle was part of some kind of key. They hunted through the ruined castle, killing Venatori and demons along the way until they had final collected all the shards needed to open the door.

 

 

That’s when things started to go even more downhill, Alexius was standing there, waiting for them despondently by the throne.

“I knew you would appear again, not that it would be now but I knew I hadn’t destroyed you. My final failure.”

“Was it worth it? Everything you did to the world? To yourself?” Dorian questioned with a restrained anger… Mira was long past being restrained.

“It doesn’t matter now, all we can do it wait for the end.”

“It does matter. I will not let this happen, I _Will_ undo this.” Mira hissed.

“How many times have I tried, the past cannot be undone. All that I fought for, all that i betrayed and what have I wrought? Ruin and Death, there is nothing else.” Alexius spat, “The elder one comes, for me, for you, for us all.”

 

It was then Leliana made her move, grabbing the hunched over ghoul and putting a knife to its throat.

“Felix!” Alexius panicked.

“That’s Felix? Maker’s breath Alexius, what have you done?!” Dorian now shouted at Alexius, the restraint flying straight out the proverbial window.

“He would have died Dorian, I saved him! Please don’t hurt my son, I’ll do anything you ask.”  Alexius now begged, Leliana just stared at him, her eyes narrow in hatred.

“Hand over the amulet Alexius and we let him go.” Mira growled.

“Let him go and I swear you’ll get what you want!” he bargained back.

 

Leliana steeled herself, speaking before Mira could deal.

 

“ _I want the world back_.” She sneered towards the magister before slitting Felix’s throat before his father.

“No. NO!” Alexius roared at the sight of his only son’s murder before summoning swirling magics to him and engaging the room.

The magister started teleporting, opening rifts and firing spells aimed to kill everyone in the room,

“I watched you fight my Behemoth Herald! How do you feel knowing _I_ decimated your armies and turn them into my own! Even your own Commander fell to my blade!” Alexius roared as he used his staff to fling Cullen’s lion helm towards Mira as she prepared to attack. The helm caught her off guard causing her to flinch slightly and get caught by Alexius’s following blast of lightning.

Mira was singed but still mobile as she renewed her attack on the magister.

 

“Your damn Commander was too stupid to realize the power he would have had, even as his men around his submitted to the red, that stubborn bastard refused me, refused the Elder one, it was my pleasure to run him through.” Alexius hissed at Mira after she landed a few well-timed strikes.

Mira’s’ rage just intensified! Here was this fucking magister! A Magister! Who’s killed and tortured her friends, turned her lover into a monster and basically destroyed all fucking Thedas and he has the nerve to taunt her with it! To taunt her with the murder of the only men who’ve shown the patience and kindness to listen to her… to respect and accept her.

 

Mira dropped down low, disappearing long before she moved in for the kill. Alexius was distracted by Blackwall and his barrage of attacks, she got in close, close enough to make her final attack. She used one blade to pin him, lodging it up under the ribs, aiming for his heart while with the other hand she reached around in a brutal and purely hate driven move to slit his throat, guaranteeing his death.

Alexius dropped like a sack as the life drained out of him, his heart no longer able to pump, his throat no longer able to take in breath. He was dead by the time he hit the floor.

Blackwall froze, wondering where the attack had come from before Mira dispelled the stealth she had cloaked herself in as she started to look for the amulet, making herself useful with this simple task so she could let the bloodlust drain from her veins.

 

“He wanted to die, didn’t he? All the lies he told himself, all the justifications. He lost Felix long ago and didn’t even realize.” Dorian sighed in melancholy, If Mira tried hard she could see where the mage was coming from, this man was once his mentor, a friend and to see him reduced to this… self-serving monster.

Mira sighed heavily, “This Alexius was too far gone, but the Alexius in our time might still be reasoned with. If only to stop this mad plot.”

“I suppose that’s true, here let me take a look at that amulet… I remember helping him create this. Give me an hour and I think I can figure out whatever spell he used to get us here.” Dorian replied, choosing to look at the more practical side as well.

 It was then Leliana came storming up to them from her vantage point near the throne, “An _Hour!_ That’s impossible! You must go now!” she snapped heatedly. The ground started to shake, only emphasising her words before this terrible screeching roar sounded overhead.

“The Elder one.” Leliana confirmed before looking to the rest of the party, the ones from this time.

“You cannot stay here.” Blackwall ordered quickly, brave Grey Warden, he looked to Sera and nodded sharply.

“We’ll hold the outer door, when they get past us, it’ll be your turn.” He continued seriously. Sera just gathered her arrows, so quiet for the usually bright rouge.

Mira twigged to what they were doing, they were going to die for her! Die to save her!

“No! I won’t let you commit suicide, there has to be another way!” she called but her objections fell on deaf ears.

“Look at us, we’re already dead, the only way we live. Is if this day never comes.” Leliana soothed softly before preparing herself as well. “Cast your spell, you have as much time as I have arrows!”

 

They all turned to face the approaching enemy while she and Dorian stepped back to prepare the spell.

 

“Though darkness closes, I am shielded by flame.” 

She turned back to see the doors burst open and a great terror demon drag the limp and bleeding body of Blackwall in by his face, only to throw him like a ragdoll to the ground.

“Andraste guide me, Maker take me to your side.”

Leliana fired her arrows, taking down dozens of the incoming Venatori before she was eventually shot back.

Mira flinched at the sight, wanting to return to the fray, to help those who’d helped her!

“ _YOU MOVE AND WE ALL DIE!_ ” Dorian yelled over the fighting. Holding her back by the arm.

Leliana fought on, taking out Venatori and demon alike. The portal slowly opened behind them, Dorian’s magic seemingly more stable than Alexius’s.

Mira was still torn, they were dying, her friends were dying in front of her again and again she could do nothing!

Eventually Leliana was caught in the arms of the greater terror! Her face frozen in horror as she reached out, sending them away or begging for help. Mira couldn’t tell as the swirling vortex consumed both Dorian and herself, sending them back to their own time.

 

The vortex swirled around them, snapping liked lighting along their bodies before they finally stepped out the other side.

“You’ll have to do better than that!” Dorian quipped as the Alexius of their time sank to his knees in defeat.

“Is that the best you’ve got?” Mira also snapped, but underneath she was relived.

“You’ve won, there is no point in extending this charade.” Alexius sighed as he admitted defeat. “Felix…” he spoke his name as he turned to look at his son.

“It’s going to be alright father.”

“You’ll die!” Alexius spoke miserably, he was a heartbroken man… different from how Mira saw him but a few moments ago,

“Everyone dies.” Felix spoke with words of wisdom, that somehow his father seemed to understand as he bowed his head and allowed himself to be chained.

 

Mira watched him be escorted out of the throne room, “Well, I’m glad that’s over with.” Dorian sighed… before the sound of incoming metal boots filled the halls.

“Or not.”

 

“Grand Enchanter Fiona.”

“Queen Anora!” Fiona bowed as she rushed before the Queen of Ferelden.

“When I granted your mages sanctuary, I thought it was understood that they would not force my people from their homes.” Anora spoke with an air of authority Mira had seen few people possess. Those cold blue eyes of hers commanded respect.

“Your Majesty, let me assure you, we never intended any of this…” Fiona tried to apologise.

“Your intentions ceased to matter when my people were threatened. I am rescinding my offer of sanctuary. You and your followers will leave Ferelden at once.” Anora ordered firmly.

“But we have hundreds who need protection! Where will we go?” Fiona questioned sharply, clearly worried for her people.

 

“I may point out that we did come here for mages to help seal the breach.” Mira interrupted, coming over to the discussion. This is what they came for, perhaps she could salvage this.

 

“And what are the terms of this arrangement?” Fiona asked suspiciously.

“Hopefully better than Alexius gave you. The Inquisition is better than that, yes?” Dorian interjected to support his fellow mages.

“We would be honoured to have you fight as allies at the Inquisitions side.” Mira offered generously, she had seen what mages were capable of when given the same freedoms as everyone else. Normality, when freed mages can live normal lives.

“I pray that the rest of the Inquisition honours your promises.” Fiona accepted with a hint of scepticism, to be honest it was to be expected.

“The breach threatens all of Thedas, we cannot afford to be divided now. We can’t fight it without you, any chance of success requires your full support.” Mira persuaded, to the notice of the Queen.

“If the Inquisition is taking responsibility for the mages, then so be it. Just get them out of my sight.” Anora ordered as she turned to leave, deeming the matter resolved.

 

With the finality of the queen’s dismissal, Fiona left to inform her fellow mages of the decision while Mira and her party returned to the Tavern to rest before making the journey back to Haven.

 

**

There was a pint in front of her, untouched. Mira was lost in her own thoughts, replaying the nightmare future over and over again. Recalling the way her blade slid into Rylen’s throat and the ferocity he tried to kill her with… Dorian was in a similar state beside her while Blackwall and Sera entertained each other with stories, hoping to spread a bit of cheer through their burdened companions.

The crowd in the bar cheered as a new group entered, they all turned to look.

And of course, it had to be him, Rylen, laughing with his men, sorting them out and sending them off to enjoy their evening. She turned away before he saw her.

 

“Maker’s Balls Herald you look like you’ve seen a ghost!” Blackwall exclaimed as he knocked back his drink. Dorian looked up at the comment having found his way into their little celebration party, only to lay eyes on a very familiar face.

He saw that Knight-Captain Rylen had just entered the tavern, a bright smile on his face as he approached the Herald.

“In a matter of speaking she has.” Dorian commented sagely as he gestured for the warden to follow him over to where Sera had gone to get more drinks by chatting up one of the Tavern girls.

 

“Brilliant work today Mira, you’ve secured a powerful alliance for the Inquisition. I’m sure the advisors will be pleased, might have ruffled a few feathers but you can’t say the mages aren’t needed now.” Rylen smiled, striking up a friendly conversation with the woman he was bedding as he ordered a drink.

“I’m just glad everyone got out of there alive. The future Dorian and I saw… just pray that never comes to pass.” Mira sighed tiredly, not even looking up at the man.

“You feeling alright Mira? You look a little worn out.” Rylen asked sympathetically, he went to place a hand on her shoulder only to have her flinch from his touch.

“I’m sorry.” Mira replied quickly and Rylen retracted his hand out of respect. “It’s just been a long day, I’m just going to call it a night.”

 

“Mira, I don’t mean to give offence, but have I done something wrong?” he asked softly, it was obvious that she was acting off. Jumpy and she kept avoiding eye contact, something she never did.

“No, no of course not. It’s just…” she trailed off there, but at least she was looking at him now.

“It’s alright, you can tell me.” He assured softly. The tavern was still lively behind them, giving Mira enough time to formulate her response.

“In that future I saw… I found you Rylen.” She admitted softly, just barely audible above the taverns hum. There was something in her voice that made Rylen nervous.

“I’m taking that this wasn’t a pleasant meeting?” he offered in a joking tone.

“You could say that. You saw the red Lyrium at the temple of sacred ashes. When I found you, those crystals had consumed you, you weren’t you Rylen. You attacked… and I killed you.”

Rylen paused for a moment… she killed him? He turned into some Red Lyrium monster? No wonder she was acting off!

“Well that’s… wow.” He breathed out in shock.

“Yeah…” Mira muttered before downing her entire mug of ale.

He spent a few moments in silence just absorbing the information… she killed him… in some weird alternative future, he became some Red Lyrium monster and she had to kill him.

“Well I imagine it’ll be pretty hard to look each other in eye in bed now.” He joked softly.

 

Mira’s eyes widened at the joke as she breathed deep in her soft laugh back, her first real moment of relief since this whole trouble started. Rylen looked at her softly… this woman, deserved more than what he could offer her. She deserved some knight in golden armour to sweep her off her feet, a dashing rouge of legends, not some washed up ex-Templar who couldn’t rub two coins together. He always knew, right from the start, that he would have to let her go.

 

“Rylen I- ” Mira started but Rylen just shook his head softly.

“Mira it’s alright. Maybe it’s better if we stop now, it’ll be… easier this way.” He looked her in the eyes as he spoke, He could grow to love her if that’s what she wanted… she was the Herald of Andraste, an icon to thousands and now champion of the mages… who was he to deny her. But he wouldn’t, couldn’t ever be good enough for her.

She was quiet, watching him as he processed what he had to do. Maker this was harder than it should have been. He’d been with a long line of lovers and saying good bye, especially on amicable terms like this had always been easy.

“We’ve had fun, though right? Just tell me I made your days a little easier and I’ll leave happy.” He sighed, taking her hands in his.

Mira smiled, tilting her head in confusion slightly before speaking. “You did, you do, make my days easier that it. Maybe if we can’t be lovers we can at least be friends instead?”

Rylen’s smile could have brightened up the night sky.

“Always Mira. Now I think I’ll let you drink and rest, I did only stop by to deliver a message this time.” His smile just continued as he pulled out a message with the Ambassadors seal on it.

“Thank you, Rylen. Keep safe you hear?”

“As safe as you can be in these times!” he joked back before taking his leave and leaving Mira free from him.

**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's the end of their relationship, i think once you've stabbed someone in the neck it takes a bit to get over that. At least they were amicable about it though.


	9. Insomnia and comfort.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mira's nightmares lead to some interesting positions.  
> Plus, Cullen's still telling his naughty thoughts to 'stop!'.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, So i was replying to everyone's comments (thank you again , they make my day!) and i kept talking about chapter 9. So as a treat (And because it's one of my favourite chapters!) i'm giving this one out early!

 

Chapter 9 –  Insomnia and comfort.

 

**

It was late but Cullen couldn’t sleep. Dreams of demons and the smell of Kirkwall burning around him kept him from his rest. So, he did what he usually did, patrol. Patrol until he had either calmed down or worn himself out enough to go back to bed. He carried a small lantern that provided just enough light for him to see by.

He was just passing the Tavern, heading down to lap past the Heralds cabin before looping back up towards the Chantry. As he approached Mira’s cabin he heard the dull thud of things hitting the floor and then suddenly the echo of a muffled scream.

Now this wasn’t the first-time Cullen had encountered such sounds coming from the Heralds cabin but something, _something_ deep in his gut was telling him that this was different. And that something was confirmed as he got closer and heard the quiet sobs coming from inside.

 

He knocked gently, hearing her startled cut off cry from inside, “Herald? Mira? Are you alright?” He called through the door.

“W-who is it?” she called back, he could hear her trying to quiet herself with small sniffs and deep breaths.

“It’s Cullen, may I come in?” he asked. He worried about her, one woman with the pressure of the world on her shoulders.

 

Slowly he could hear her shuffle on the other side of the door, the splashing of water and then the slow shuffle of feet coming towards the door. She opened it slowly and the first thing he noticed was her hair. She had it down, undone from her usual over the shoulder braid. She wore a thick blue knit fisherman’s jumper and men’s wool trousers that were miles too big for her.

Her hair was mused from sleep and there was evidence of her crying shown by the red around her eyes and the puffiness of her cheeks.

 

“Commander, I’m afraid you’ve caught me at an inopportune time. See I was just reading the saddest book and well…” she shrugged. She was lying, badly, but still trying to make a joke. She was usually much smoother than this. She was leaning on the doorframe, blocking entry into her cabin as she spoke.

“Must have been a terrible book,” he remarked playing along with her story, “May I come in?” he pressed again, he wanted to help if he could, lighten her burden.

She nodded silently as she stepped back, allowing the Commander into her cabin. They hadn’t spoken privately since their encounter in the woods with the kiss that set his blood on fire.

 

“Have a seat if you like. Drink?” she offered already pouring herself one. She was trembling slightly as she moved. Hurt? Scared?

“Just a little one.” He accepted if nothing to just dull his racing mind.

 

She nodded again before passing over his drink before curling up into the love chair opposite him.

“That’s a nice jumper. Looks uh warm.” He offered scrambling for conversation.

She looked down slightly in confusion before forcing a small laugh.

 

“It gets so cold here a-and I don’t have many clothes or well, things of my own. Blackwall gave me these when we were travelling back from Redcliffe. He said I kept shivering when we sat by the fire. He’s rather sweet for such a burly man.” She finished with a smile, which was tired but not as forced as her laugh previously.

“It looks like you need a good pair of socks to keep your feet warm.” He smiled back, hoping to encourage her into relaxing a bit.

 

Something flashed across her eyes as he spoke. Surprise? Fear? Regret? She inhaled through her nose, almost as if she was trying to laugh but Cullen watched as her face just grew redder and those big tears started to pool in her eyes.

“I-I’m sorry! I didn’t mean too; I didn’t mean to criticise! Maker I’m such an ass.” He rambled on, maker he felt horrible, he made her cry!

“No. no I’m sorry. I’m just _so_ tired and I just- I just can’t stop.” She sobbed quietly. She’d curled in on herself even more, wiping the tears away viciously. “I must look quite the wretch.” She quipped trying to laugh through the tears. Always laughing this one.

 

“You’re beautiful.” He told her softly coming down to kneel in front of her and hold her hands in an attempt to distract her.

“You’re sweet.” She chuckled, taking one of her hands back to wipe away a stray tear. She breathed deeply for a moment before squeezing his hands back, “I’m just being silly, here I am thinking about everything that I don’t have anymore… I lost it years ago… I shouldn’t be upset; it was just a pair of stupid socks.” She sighs making room on the chair as she pulled Cullen up to sit next to her.

 

He hesitated at first, thinking that it would be inappropriate to be so close to her while she was vulnerable but the way her hands guided him. Pulling him gently to sit next to her. He couldn’t resist.

 

“What was so important about a pair of socks?” he asked quietly, trying to garner some context for her words. She snorted, having finally dried her eyes as she shuffled closer, leaning into him.

“They were stupid, outrageous bright red socks, hand knitted, full of holes and the left one kept falling down… but Finn made them, he made them for me because I complained about how cold Ferelden was. He tried, he tried his best and because of that they were perfect.” She sighed, looking down in a melancholy manner. He just sat there quietly listening.

“I feel like I’ve just escaped one prison just to be snapped up again… I’ve seen what happens if I fail. I literally hold the world in my hand.” She frowned down looking down to her hand. Cullen hadn’t noticed before but she had tied a scrap of cloth around it, dimming the bright green. Probably so she could sleep.

“I don’t want this Cullen, to be responsible for all these lives but I saw…” she paused, holding his chin in her hand as she looked up to him, “I saw… I _won’t_ let that happen.” She growled firmly.

“You didn’t talk much about it at the meeting. I uh don’t mean to pry that is.” he asked before quickly stammering, quietly kicking himself. What if that’s what she was afraid of, he knew better than anyone not to bring up bad memories!

“How do you tell your friends you saw them as walking corpses. Saw piles of bodies infused with Red Lyrium, to the point where it was growing out of the walls. I listened to the guards when I scouted ahead… And Thank you by the way. You came for me, you laid siege to that castle for months, you used my name as a rallying call as you fought… but eventually the Elder one… I found your helmet in the throne room, Alexius kept it as a trophy. The man who wouldn’t surrender, the man who would never submit. Thank you.”

 

Cullen shifted, pressing his shoulder back into the chair so he could pull Mira up and into his side. A movement which caught them both by surprise.

“Of course, I came for you. I will always come for you Mira.” He promised softly as he pulled her in close against him, thankful that he had decided to leave his armour in his tent when he took his walk.

She sighed softly in relief as she sank into his chest, her arm, heavy with knitted wool found its way across his stomach. He hadn’t noticed before just how much smaller she was than him. But now sitting so close together, flushed hip to hip, her chin barely came past his shoulder. If he wanted he could just tuck her into his lap, just under his chin.

 

“Thank you, Cullen.” She yawned, her cheek was against his chest, just over his heart. Her red hair was falling messily over her shoulders. She tucked her knees up over his lap as she got comfortable, the whole time her eyes stayed shut, as if she was falling asleep.

“Mira?” he asked, shaking her gently to get her attention.

“Mm?” she mumbled looking up sleepily at him.

“You should go back to bed.” He told her, starting to shift himself into a better position so he could carry her.

 

“Don’t wanna.” She grumbled back, her smaller hands fisting themselves into his shirt almost like an angry child.

“Come on. Up we go.” He muttered picking her up anyway. He cradled her into his chest. One arm under her legs and the other firmly around her, nestling her head against his shoulder.

“I don’t want to go to sleep, I’ll have the nightmares. I don’t’ want you to go.” She whined sleepily as Cullen carried her over back to bed.

 

Her eyes were rolling as he walked, she just couldn’t keep them open as the exhaustion caught up with her. Cullen slowly managed to place her down back into her bed but as he was trying to remove her hands from her shirt she whimpered, the sound twisting in his chest.

“Don’t go.” She whispered, her eyes blinking open on the verge of tears.

That sound, that plea broke him, so he did the only thing he could think of. He kicked off his shoes and jacket quietly as she wouldn’t let go of his shirt even when he started to slide into the bed next to her.

She shuffled back to make room for the larger man, allowing him to get comfortable before she came back to rest her head on his shoulder. Safe and warm in his arms.

“Thank you Cull.” She muttered, sliding an arm over his chest as she cuddled into him.

“Get some sleep.” He chuckled back, using the arm that was behind her to slowly rub circles into her back.

She was out like a light within seconds but he didn’t dare leave in case she might awake. So, he stayed, idly rubbing soothing circles into the back of a beautiful and over pressured woman before eventually he started to slip… off… to sleep himself.

 

 

**

 

Mira’s morning started out much like any other morning, apart from one startling difference. She was being squished to death by a very large, very asleep man. She could almost recollect begging Cullen to stay, she didn’t think he’d actually stay all night but somehow, she was glad he did. He was holding her with both arms wrapped around her and his head nestled just in front of hers on her pillow.

He was still in a deep sleep if the flickering beneath his eyelids was anything to go by but by the maker did he look sweet. He looked like a young man, his face slack one cheek mushed into the pillow, eyes and mouth devoid of the tension that he wore throughout the day. She would almost say he looked rather handsome but she knew he look even better when he smiled.

Mira lay there watching him for a few more moments before glancing over to the window. It was still early, barely past dawn, it was probably just the unusual presence of another body in bed that disturbed her sleep. So, she did what any sane sleep loving person would do. She carefully readjusted herself, sliding down to rest just under Cullen’s chin as she slid an arm around his waist and slipped her thigh between his legs. Perfectly comfortable.

 

Once she was done, Cullen snorted in his sleep at the disturbance before tightening his hold just slightly, as if he was trying to protect her from her nightmares or use her to keep his own at bay.

She smiled into his neck, protective even in his sleep, the perfect Commander she thought sluggishly as she slowly drifted back off to sleep.

 

**

By the time Cullen finally awoke he was startled out of all traces of rest when he realised where he was and more importantly who he was with. Mira Trevelyan, the Herald of Andraste was _snuggled_ like a mouse against his chest.

She was in no other words _adorable,_ her face squished up into his shoulder, arms wrapped around him just like his were around her and her leg was tucked up between his thighs where she was pressing against his…

 

Oh no.

Oh, maker why now.

 

He glanced around the room trying to look for a way to escape, that’s when he noticed the light in the room. Shit, he’d over slept too! Finding no other way to escape his _sensitive_ situation he started to pull back from the warm body in front of him. The moment he moved however Mira grumbled sleepily and latched on tighter, this time pressing her thigh firmly against his eager cock.

 

He had to bite back a groan at the unexpected friction as he froze in place, waiting until he was sure she was still asleep to try and move again.

He didn’t get far, barely managing to extract his arm from around her waist before she stirred again.

“Finn, love. It’s early… go back to sleep.” She mumbled against his neck, pressing a soft kiss there before she settled again.

 

Shit.

She thought he was…

Oh shit.

 

His efforts to escape renewed to save them both embarrassment, he pulled his arms back and just about managed to pull her leg out from between his own when she started to stir again, trying to get back into his warmth which would be bloody adorable if he wasn’t in such an awkward position. Maker’s breath, how long had it been since he’d woken up in bed with a beautiful woman. 4….5 years? Wound up in bed after a too rowdy night at the hanged man with some poor woman who name he didn’t even know. 3 years since he’d even had a date and that ended terribly.

But here she was, Mira Trevelyan, Mira damn Trevelyan. Not only did he know her name, he knew some of her past, knew the weight on her shoulders and he cared. Maker damn him he really cared.

 

“No, early… sleep.” She growled, shoving him slightly as she rolled over away from him, she even took the blanket with her.

 

Thank the maker for small mercies.

With his body now free of Mira’s grasp he pulled himself from bed and quickly gathered his stuff from where he left it on the floor, slipping on his boots and jacket, before heading for the door.

 

With his hand on the door, ready to leave he couldn’t help but give one last look over to her sleeping form.

She’d rolled over and shuffled into his warm spot, and in a single heartbeat, he wanted to go back. _Wanted to kiss her awake and enjoy a slow morning for once.._.

Steeling himself with a sigh, he pushes himself through the doorway and into the start of a new day.

 

**

 

Mira awoke a little while later, slowly becoming aware of the lack of warm bodies in her bed as she hunted for Cullen to snuggle into and found him absent. She sighed in disappointment, glancing around the room to see if he was even around? That’s when she noticed the shadows around the room and the warm sunlight streaming in from around her door.

It was late, he probably had to go see the troops or something. They were going to seal the breach today, or at least that was the plan, he was probably sorting out defensive positions if the worst should happen.

 

Mira got up slowly, taking her time when she noticed her bed still held the scent of Cullen’s soap, oak moss, elderflower, and something so undeniably him it was hard to describe.  She smiled to herself softly, he stayed the night, just because she asked, just because she’d been afraid.

Maybe he was growing sweet on her.

… like she was on him.

 

**

 

“Defensive positions have been organised, the troops know what to do if worst comes to worst and Leliana’s scouts will patrol the breach after the fact to ensure that it remains closed.” Cullen informed the council.

They stood around the table debating, preparing to tackle an enemy so much bigger than them, unpredictable and potentially lethal. He knew only too well the casualties that occurred when this thing opened, he did not want a repeat of that.

 

He glanced over at Mira, she was surrounded by her team, all fully equipped in the best arms and armour they could find, Mira even had her favourite scarf tied around her neck neatly, softening the plate of light armour that protected her chest and neck.

She was beautiful, fierce, and deadly, swathed in navy and silver armour, a coat that hinted back to her pirating days while also providing protection against whatever foe she would face. A Goddess of War, the Herald to the lady of fire. But even through all of this he could help but feel some kind of joy from knowing how her face softens while she sleeps, how the layers of strength, of humour and even anxiety slip from her body and leave her with something beautiful and precious.

Maker he was a goner.

 

“Alright, so the only thing left for us to do is assault this breach.” Mira smirked, he declaration caused some of her team to chuckle. Cullen observed them quietly. It was quite the group she’d managed to gather, even those surrounding her now. A Warden, A Tevinter Mage and a Quinari bodyguard, each helping her, fighting alongside her… protecting her. He had to admit, just quietly to himself that he was jealous of them. Of the time they were able to spend with her, fighting, laughing… bonding with her.

“Oh yes, Assault the magical tear in the sky by waving your glowing hand at it. Splendid, be home in time for supper I wager.” Dorian quipped with a smirk.

“I wager it’ll be a bit more complicated than that mage, but still, nothing our lady can’t handle!” Blackwall groused towards the mage but also ended with a small smirk towards Mira… She was wearing his clothes last night…

 

Cullen could feel the jealously flaring in his gut. No, focus on the task at hand.

 

“Maybe we should quit standing around and go give the fade the finger, the Bosses tiny lady finger.” Bull teased, there had been talk of Mira getting drunk one night and challenging the Quinari to an arm wrestling contest in the Tavern… and the following laughter as he swallowed both of Mira’s hands in one fist. To be fair she did have smaller hands, long fingers though… long clever fingers that could - _Stop!_

“We can’t all be giants like you Bull. You lot go get some potions and stuff. I'll be out in a minute.” Mira chuckled, giving the order after one last look over their troop positions, they would meet Cassandra and Solas up at the temple where they were already preparing the mages.

 

Mira’s glanced up to look at him, a smile slowly slid over her face, a true smile, soft with the corner of her mouth curving up to show a hint of teeth.

Everybody was filing out around them while they stayed, lingering in the back, eyes still finding each other. The door closed behind Bull quietly, giving the two a moment to speak privately.

 

“I really should thank you for last night.” She said quietly, the smile still lingered in her eyes as she moved closer, the silk inlaid in her armour swishing as she swayed.

“There’s no need, I was happy to help and it wasn’t like I didn’t get anything out of it. Best night sleep I’ve had in a long time, even slept in.” he grinned rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly.

_The smell of her hair underneath his nose, the feel of her arm over his waist and her thigh between his legs– Stop!_

 

“No, no really I want to. You know after we close this breach, there’s probably going to be one hell of a party. We could have dinner together? Maybe even some dancing?” she smiled, there was an offer in her words, a teasing undertone.

 

“That sounds, _really nice_ ,” he sighed softly before flushing with embarrassment, “But I warn you, Templars don’t dance, well, I can’t dance.” He fumbled, cringing internally, Maker could he be more of an idiot, what if she gets the wrong signal, what if she thinks-

“Well, maybe I’ll dance for you?” she chuckled, low and seductive, her eyes drifting down it his lips, which caused him to do the same. Her lips her beautiful lips as she tugged her lower lip between her teeth, gazing at him heatedly.

Cullen felt all the blood in his body suddenly rush south. _Her_ , dancing for him. Her body moving in rhythm around him… _on him_ … just for him.

 

“BOSS! Hurry up, we’re moving!” bellowed The Iron Bull thoroughly breaking the air that had descended on the pair.

 

Mira’s head snapped up, focused determined… and oh so beautiful. He was blushing, violently, cock hardening in his trousers, _Thank the maker for the level of this table._

“I need to get going. But I’ll see you later, for dinner, yes?” she questioned, he realized he hadn’t said anything back, too caught up in his own fantasies to think clearly.

“I uh Dinner, yes! Yes, I’ll see- you! I’ll see you for dinner.” He floundered, tongue heavy and stupid in his mouth as he rushed out his reply.

She smiled, properly smiled, a small laugh bubbling from her throat.

“I’ll look forward to it, _Commander._ ” She purred, turning quickly to catch up to her team, leaving Cullen a few moments to immolate in peace.

 

Maker that woman was going to be the death of him.

 

**

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Rubs hands together* 
> 
> Oh, a date huh?   
> I wonder what i 'as a writer' could possibly do to our poor, sweet protagonists?
> 
> *Hand rubbing intensifies!*
> 
> Next chapter coming out Monday 26th (I'm scheduling this shit now!)


	10. Tender.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Our pair finally go out to dinner and Mira... Mira dances.

_ Chapter 10 - Tender. _

 

 

It was done! The breach sealed without a maker-damned hitch! She did it! They did it! They’d saved Thedas!

The whole camp was bustling, filled with an almost frantic sense of relief! Everyone was bringing out food, drinks! Those who could play music, played on whatever instruments they could find, bonfires were lit as people brought out chairs and people were dancing, with anyone they could find. Pure revelry!

Mira was taking a few moments to go over her appearance once again in the mirror. The bulkier parts of her armour were hanging up out of the way as she wore some of the nicer clothes Isabella bought for her.

Blue silk shirt, soft black leather pants, her coat and long boots. she left her weapons behind with her armour as surely, she wouldn’t need them tonight.

One last check in the mirror, red hair braided back from her face but left down so it would swish as she danced, she smiled at that thought, red lips pulling in her reflection. _Perfect._

 

*Knock Knock*

 

She jumped slightly with nervous excitement, Maker she felt like young again, like she was going on her first proper date with the cutest barmaid in Rivain, practically skipping over to the door.

Opening the door revealed Cullen standing there, looking impeccable as ever and even more nervous than usual.

“Mira, you look,” he paused sighing softly as he stared at her, stuttering in response before settling into a smile.

“You scrub up well yourself.” She grinned back, taking the initiative to guide them back into the town.

“Ah, I mean to say you look lovely.” He added, quickly catching up.

 

She chuckled to herself softly, this man, oh he was adorable.

“Shall we find some dinner? It’s been quite the day.” She smiled, hand reaching out to tug gently at his wrist, guiding him towards the delicious smells coming from the tavern.

 

He looked down to her in surprise, she was smiling, leading him with her small hand, fingers barely fitting around his wrist. Slowly, he slid his wrist from her grasp, turning his hand over towards hers, and slid his fingers into her palm, slotting both their hands together as they walked.

Mira paused slightly, realising what he just did as she glanced down quickly at their hands together before looking back up at him. She was blushing something fierce, cheeks almost as red as her hair.

 

He smiled softly and slowly took the lead, leading her into the busy tavern, which cheered of course as she entered, and into a quickly cleared table in the far corner for them to sit in relative privacy.

They were quickly served with a bottle of red and the best side of roasted pork and vegetables to share between them. Cullen served her, giving her all the best bits off the main plate and pouring her wine whenever her glass even hinted of showing the bottom.

“How are you feeling? Closing the breach is a feat of legend all in itself.” Cullen started, trying to make conversation, admittedly he had spent most of the meal getting lost just watching her.

“I feel great, better than I have in a long time. My list of things to worry about is actually getting less for once in my life!” she laughed, taking another sip of her wine.

 

“So, what do you plan on doing now the breach is closed?” he asked, the question itself was leading, he knew it but he also wanted to know if she would stay nearby.

“I’ve got no immediate plans, somethings I’d like to do but nothing major. It’s just nice having some freedom. I think I’d like to see the sea again, this time on my own terms.” She smiled softly as they made small talk.

“The last time was on the way into Ferelden, right?” he asked trying to piece together her journey.

“Yeah, but I always liked the water, can’t swim for shite though! We weren’t allowed to go swimming as kids, there was always something important to be done, language lessons, singing, lady talents and such. I first got to swim in the warm water of Rivain!” she laughed softly and maker was Cullen entranced. She was lighter here, happy.

“I say swim, it was more like bob in the water trying not to drown before some of the kids on the beach came in with me and tried to teach me.” 

 

Cullen laughed, he could imagine that. A younger, less freckled proper young lady, trying to float in the water. Laughing with the other kids on the beach, much like he and his siblings did every summer up at the lake back home.

“When I was younger, before I left home to become a Templar, my siblings and I would spend our summer in the lake near the village. My brother and I would race across the water while Mia played with Rosalie in the shallows with Mother. It was, a very long time ago.” There was a smile on his face as he talked, melancholy but fond.

“How old were you when you left?”

“13 years old. The order sees you trained and educated first but I didn’t become a full Templar until I turned 18.”

“Only 13 years old… that just seems so young.”

“I wasn’t the youngest initiate. At the time, there was nothing in the world I wanted more than to become a Templar. To help people, to protect them. Somewhere along the line, I lost sight of that and things just went wrong.” He sighed, maybe reminiscing wasn’t such a good Idea.

Mira looked at him with a sad smile of her own, “I certainly know what that’s like.”

He nodded in agreement before she stood up suddenly, this time with a smile on her face and her hand stretched out towards him.

 

“Now Commander, let’s leave this terribly dreary subject behind. Come dance with me.” She laughed, hips already starting to sway to the drifting music coming from outside.

 

He took her hand with a laugh of his own and willingly followed her towards the music. Her hips were moving in time with the beat as she moved them both in a clear space, just out of sight from most the town, a little nook just behind the tavern, dark, but with just enough light to see each other.

They didn’t talk, he lent against the building as she stepped out into the light and started to move.

 

The music was fast and joyful and she moved oh so beautifully. Like oil swirling across the water, she moved with the beat, hips swinging, body spinning in time as her hands twisted up to the sky. The anchor drew him like a siren’s call.

She laughed, bright and full of life, slowly drawing him towards her. Like a moth to the flame.

He smiled, finally getting some courage to take a step closer. Her face lighting up in excitement as he approached.

 

 

That’s when it all went to hell.

 

 

Heavy, rushed foot falls, sprinting towards them.

“Herald! My Lady Herald!” the messenger shouted sprinting towards her in the light. Mira stopped her dance to look at the messenger in concern. Something was very, very wrong here.

“I need to find the Commander! We’re in danger!” the panicked messenger whispered loudly.

“I’m here, what’s going on?” he ordered, stepping into the messenger’s sight.

“Forces approaching sir! It’s a massive group, coming over the mountain! Sir, Sir they killed my squad! They’re going to kill us!” the poor boy almost sobbed.

Cullen looked up to Mira, a moment of pure adrenaline rushed through him, this was bad. They weren’t prepared for an assault.

“What’s your name solider?” he ordered, pulling on his Commanding persona, maker he was going to need every bit of it.

“M-Martin sir.”

“Martin, I need you to run and sound the alarm, alert as many of the officers as you can on the way, shout it if you have to. Now go!” he barked, sending the boy of with a forceful shove in the direction of the bell.

 

Mira looked at him, a frown creasing those beautiful features before she spoke.

“What do you need me to do?”

“I need you to grab your weapons and gather your team, meet me by the gate. I’ll rally the others.” He was calculating every possible way this could go in his head, trying to predict how best to spread his troops to defend the village.

She nodded firmly before turning to leave. He caught her wrist just as she was about to leave. She turned her head, blue eyes meeting his. She was scared but also determined.

“Be careful Mira, please.” He asked, thumb stroking the back of her hand a few times, trying to rack his brain of a way to say everything else unsaid, everything she meant to him. He had to let her go, she smiled though as he did, nodding to his request.

“Keep safe Cullen.” She replied before running back to her cabin.

 

“FORCES APPROACHING! TO ARMS!” he yelled running into the main camp to alert people before making his way to the gate. He grabbed a sword and shield, barked orders at his officers and soldiers, directed the villagers into their homes or the Chantry as he ran to the gate, meeting Cassandra and Josephine there.

 

Haven became a flurry of activity, you could hear the armour of the approaching force. Cullen got up on the look outs post, grabbing the telescope off the scout to try and identify their enemy. Nothing, nothing but the sound and sight of soldiers approaching. Armour clanking, troops marching.

“What banner are they under?” Josephine asked, she was scared but trying to help, trying to formulate a plan.

“None.” He replied. Jumping back down to them, just as the Herald came jogging down the stairs, her team in tow.

“None?” Josephine asked again, this time with a hint more fear in her voice.

 

“What’s the situation Cullen.” Mira asked, trying to assess what the hell was going on and how best to handle it.

“Not good, a massive force approaching, the bulk over the mountain.” He replied glancing about to make sure the archers were in place.

Explosions sounded outside the gate, banging against the frame.

“I can’t come in unless you open!” shouted this desperate voice from the other side.

Mira glanced at Cullen, already heading towards the sound. Cullen nodded back, drawing his sword and gesturing for the guards to open the gate.

 

An enemy solider stood there, brutish and quickly approaching Mira. Suddenly the solider was cut in the back, knees hitting the ground with a thud, revealing this boy. A boy wearing a wide brimmed hat.

 

“I’m Cole. I came to warn you. To help. People are coming to hurt you. You probably already know.” Cole spoke, coming closer with an almost frantic tone.

“What is this? What’s going on?!” Mira questioned sharply, Cullen was constantly scanning the surroundings. But he could see she was worried.

“The Templars come to kill you.”

Cullen watched the colour drain from Mira’s face, the fear in her eyes.

“Templars?! Is this the Order’s response to our talks with the mages? Attacking blindly?” Cullen barked moving in front of Mira in a bid to defend her.

“The Red Templars went to the Elder One. You know him? He knows you. You took his Mages.” The boy explained. Mira panicked, Templars were after her, AGAIN!  

“There.” The boy gestured to a hill nearby. They all looked over, the hill, that man.  _That Bastard!_

“I know that man… but this Elder one…” Cullen growled.

“He’s very angry that you took his mages.”

 

They both looked towards the approaching army, but there up on the hill stood Samson. That wretched scum of the earth, Lyrium stealing bastard Samson! And what Cullen could only surmise was a Darkspawn… but bigger, more human… their Elder One.

 

“Cullen! Give me a plan! Anything?” Mira barked, fear lacing her words.

“Haven is no fortress Mira. If we are to withstand this monster, we _must_ control the battle.” He advised clearly. Maker this couldn’t be happening, he couldn’t be doing this.

“Get out there and hit that force, use everything you can!” he ordered firmly, fore turning to address his troops.

“Mages! You- You have sanction to engage them! That is Samson. He will not make it easy!” he roared, preparing his troops,

“Inquisition! With the Herald! For you lives! For all of us!” came the final battle cry.

The troops responded with a cry of their own, rallying around their commander as they took to their stations.

He turned to give one last look towards Mira, towards his herald. But she was already moving, running into battle with her daggers drawn, red hair whipping around her as she buried her daggers into her first enemy jumping to the next without pause, his own Goddess of War.

 

**

Shit.

Shit, shit, shit!

This couldn’t be happening! Red Templars, just like in that awful future she’d witnessed.

They paired up, Blackwall guarding her back while she dove into the fray attacking with furry and an anger she couldn’t quite contain. Bull was fighting alongside Dorian, the Quinari taking the bulk of the forces while the Mage picked off their enemies with well-timed and precise spells.

Waves upon waves of enemies came to die on their blades, until it came to a point where Mira had to move positions lest the bodies pile up.

“Centred and clear! Firing!”

 

Suddenly the trebuchet shot up, launching a flaming ball into the approaching hordes.

“They felt that! We’ll reload, you get to the other trebuchet, it isn’t firing!” the Captain called out before turning back to order her troops to reload as fast as they could.

Mira nodded, whistling to signal the rest of her team before turning towards the other trebuchet. They ran, not wanting to waste any time, the quicker they could get that thing firing, the better chance they stood of surviving this!

 

They ran past Rylen evacuating the forge, “Mira be careful! The scouts are not at their post!” he yelled pointing in the direction of the remaining trebuchet.

She nodded firmly, signalling to the others as she dropped low into stealth, rushing in towards the danger to scout out their opponent.

More Red Templars, but she was quick, she managed to take out three of them. Knifes in the back or slit across the throat, before the others became aware of her presence.

The Inquisition soldiers lay dead on the ground, this trebuchet being firmly occupied by the enemy. Their only recourse was to drive them out, retake it and fire this thing into the enemy!

 

Mira was steadily growing more and more fierce, her attacks becoming less refined and more brutal. She was aiming to kill, not maim like she did on their travels.

“Blackwall, get on that trebuchet and get it centred! I’ll watch your back, Dorian keep them off the perimeter, Bull kill any that get through! Keep them off Blackwall!” Mira yelled, cutting down an enemy archer from the aiming platform.

The fight seemed to be never ending, wave after wave of Red Templar bastards!

“Blackwall, how we going?” Bull yelled, cutting one of those monsters in two.

“Almost there!”

“Shit, Bull watch out!” Mira yelled, skidding behind him while being pursued by one the knights. She was tiring and this beast was hammering out blow after blow while she scrambled to defend herself.

“Boss, DOWN!” came Bulls bellow. She followed instantly, dropping to the ground in a low slide as Bull came over the top of her, smashing his axe into the beast’s chest, knocking him backwards as it died in a gurgle of blood.

“Thanks.” Mira panted, quickly righting herself, assessing the field for other enemies… they seemed to have made a dent in the invading forces!

 

“READY, FIRING!” Blackwall yelled as the wooden frame of the Trebuchet flung up in the air, sending its payload flying into the mountainside, causing a small avalanche to come crashing down on the opposing army!

 

A mighty cheer went up from the camp as everyone saw the crushing blow…

Then things got even worse.

 

There was this sound, a strangled, visceral cry that set your teeth on edge… and then the beat of heavy wings… A Dragon.

The beast aimed at the trebuchet, shooting a strange, tainted fire at the machine, destroying it in one fell swoop.

 

Shit, shit, **shit!**

“Vishante Kaffas! You southerners don’t have dull days do you! What the hell was that!”

“Everyone back to the gates!” she growled, already turning to run back to the village.

The dragon was circling back around, they ran as fast as they could, trying to pull any stragglers left outside with them.

 

“Herald! Help me with this!” Harret yelled, desperately trying to get into his home by the forge.

“Bull! Break the crate! Dorian keep moving, Blackwall help that soldier!” Mira ordered, while pilfering the box of potions someone left out, grabbing enough for everyone before they moved out again!

They ran to the sounds of _Pull back now! Get that boy out of here! Fall back, everybody fall back!!_

 

“Move it, Move it!” Cullen yelled, standing by the gate, trying to ensure that everyone left made it back into the village, fore closing the gates.

“We need everyone back at the Chantry! It’s the only building that might hold against… That _Beast!_ ” he ordered to his remaining soldiers, turning back to Mira with worry.

“At this point, just make them work for it.” He sighed, their eyes meeting for a moment. Her determination was cut plain against her face, inspiring him, driving him to do better, to protect her and everyone.

 

Dragon fire was slowly consuming the village as they all made haste for the chantry, Cullen ordering his men to do one last sweep of the village, to make sure they could give everyone left a chance.

He watched Mira take the opposite route around the village, splitting up to cover more ground at once. Cullen hauled a recruit towards the Chantry, slinging the injured girl against his shoulder before someone else came to take her.

“You shall not desecrate this holy place! You monsters have turned your back on the Chantry and on the Maker himself!”

“We have a new Maker now Chancellor, and he is more powerful that your absent god and his whore of a bride!” the Red Templar shouted, drawing his sword as he pursed the bureaucrat.

“Do you have no soul! This is a house of the most Holy!” The Chancellor cried, Maker there were two villagers standing behind him, Roderick was shielding them.

Cullen ran faster, he had to help! They were innocents! Maker please… don’t.

A cry went up as the Templar ran his sword through Roderick, the villagers screamed and fled as the Templar towered over the older man.

“Where is your Maker now, Chancellor?” the Templar sneered at the Chancellor on the end of his blade.

 

Cullen barrelled into him, knocking the Templar backwards, forcing him to relinquish his blade to regain his balance. That was all the time Cullen needed, the Templar had been so focused on the Chancellor, on revelling in whatever drug ran in his veins and the power it held that he hadn’t seen him coming. Two strokes of his sword were all it took. One sweeping cut across the bastard’s chest, causing his opponent to fumble and trip backwards on the uneven ice… and another to plunge his sword into his heart as he sprawled on the floor.

He looked up to find the strange boy from the gates helping Roderick to his feet, pressing elfroot into the wound, as he helped him inside the Chantry. Cullen followed, he needed to figure out what the in the void to do!

 

Blood.

Ash.

Fire.

Visions of Kinloch Hold danced before his eyes, demons come to torture him, of Amell’s face and body calling him to submit… he wanted to, his feelings for Amell were… similar to what he felt for Mira. Maker why didn’t he just tell her?! Why didn’t he just kiss her…

 

“Commander! We’ve got the villagers hold up in the tunnels underneath the Chantry, we’ve some supplies with them but we’re still sorting through them. A lot of the villagers haven’t come through yet or are dead outside.” Rylen reported, running a stressful hand through his brown hair. His voice snapped Cullen back to reality. They were at a dead end, a position hard to defend, even if they sent the soldiers out to defend the Chantry, even if they could stand their ground against an army! That dragon of theirs could just simply burn the place down and anyone who could survive that would still be cut down by that fucking army!

 

Shit.

 

“Move, keep going. The Chantry is your shelter!” came Roderick’s voice, breaking through his thoughts.

He turned to see Mira running in, heat high on her cheeks and sweat dripping from her forehead, she wiped it off quickly, pausing for a moment to shove her red hair out of her face. She turned just as Roderick fell, the strange boy waiting by him again helped him inside.

“He tried to stop a Templar… the Blade went deep.” The boy explained. “He’s going to die.”

“What a charming boy.” The Chancellor replied, allowing himself to be helped off.

 

 

“Get the people into manageable teams and spare at least 8 guards for each team, then tell me how many soldiers I have left.” He ordered knowing that Rylen would understand what he needed, people in protectable cells, not too big to be a hindrance if they needed to escape, yet big enough so that they could and enough soldiers to guard them and cut a path.

Cullen turned back to head towards the entrance where Mira was catching her breath.

“Herald, our position isn’t good. That Dragon stole back anytime you might have earned us.” He informed her, reverting to formalities in case people were listening. They needed to hear their titles, that the Herald of Andraste was here… he needed to give them hope.

“I’ve seen an Archdemon, I was in the fade but it looked like that.” The boy informed. There was something wrong with that. There had been no sighting of Darkspawn, apart from the Elder One himself.

“I don’t care what it looks like! It’s cut a path for that army. They’ll kill everyone in Haven!” he barked back, laying down what was going on. Mira needed to know how bad their position was.

“The Elder one doesn’t care about the village. He only wants the Herald.” Cole told them plainly, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

 

Mira looked to Cullen with a look that could only be called despair, mixed with a touch of anger.

“Why! What the hell does he want! Why are the Templars coming for me again!” she snarled, panic lacing her words as she pursued the boy. “No wait,” she paused taking a deep breath.

“I don’t care what he wants. How do we stop him?” she asked firmly.

“It won’t be easy. He has a Dragon.” The boy supplied unhelpfully.

Cullen’s temper shorted, “We know what he-!” he had to pull himself in before he lost it.

“Herald, there are no tactics to make this survivable.” He told her heavily.

“The only thing that slowed them was the avalanche. We could turn the remaining Trebuchets, cause one last slide.” The option was there, it was the only thing he could think of! Bury the enemy and hope they could dig their way out before them.

“Cullen we’re overrun. To hit the enemy, we’d burry Haven.”  She argued desperately. He watched her glance around, the villagers were all looking to her to save them. He knew the pressure she had on her shoulders… and he had to ask this of her. He had to ask her to bury them.

 

“We’re dying, but we can decide how. Many don’t get that choice.” He finished softly. The dragons roar overhead sparked another vision of Kinloch, of his brothers and sisters being savaged by demons and blood mages.

They were desperate, dying! He looked at her and saw a woman. A beautiful woman, one who he would have liked to know… he should have danced with her… her should have told her.

Mira scrunched up her face, burying it in her hands for a moment as she composed herself. This couldn’t be the end, there was so many thing she wanted to do… so much time wasted, “Cullen I-“

He perked, glancing up at her eyes, sad blue eyes that pulled at him. He wanted to kiss her, to pull her close and shield her from all this.

 

“Yes, that. Chancellor Roderick can help! He wants to say it before he dies.” Coles voice broke the spell. Whatever words Mira was going to say melted on her tongue as their attention snapped to the dying man.

“There is a path. You wouldn’t know it unless you’d made the summer pilgrimage. As I have.”

That caught their attention, Mira glanced back at Cullen, hope dancing between them.

“The people can escape. She must have shown me. Andraste must have shown me so I could… tell you.” Roderick gasped, staring at Mira like she was Andraste herself.

“What are you on about Roderick?” it was no secret that they didn’t get along, Roderick made that clear the moment they met and even Mira thought him no better than a Templar.

“It was whim that I walked the path. I did not mean to start – it was overgrown. Now, with so many at the Conclave dead, to be the only one who remembers… I don’t know Herald.” He paused, and Cullen had to admit, even Mira softened at bit at the old man’s words.

“If this simple memory can save us, this could be more than mere accident. _You_ could be more.”

She took in the information like a breath of fresh air. They could get out, the villagers could be saved, they could all be saved.

 

“What about it Cullen? Will it work?” she asked, turning to him with hope in her eyes.

“Possibly. _If_ he shows us the path. But what of your escape?” Cullen asked, the same hope shining back at her in his eyes before it crumbled… escape wasn’t in her plan.

She had to turn away, there was so much she wanted to tell him, to do with him! She wanted to dance with him, to laugh with him, to lo- ah fuck, fate it seemed would not be kind to her.

His hand came around her wrist gently, guiding her to look at him, fingers sliding into her smaller hand… much like they had done earlier that day. His face spoke of determination, of hopefulness… but his golden eyes were marred with sadness.

 

“Perhaps you will surprise it, find a way… I could help! I could come with you! Fight with you!” he spoke earnestly, desperation bleeding into him like a knife in the ribs.

“And then the Inquisition would lose its Herald and Commander in one night, we can’t do that. You need to lead them out, get them to safety.” She sighed, a smile touching her lips as she cupped his cheek in her hand.

“No, they don’t need me. They need you Mira- I – Maker I can’t lose you now.” The confession came out choked, a strangled plea.

“It’ll be alright Cullen, you get the Inquisition to safety and I’ll go fight a dragon… cause if I have to go, at least I’ll go out with a bang.” She laughed, shaking off the fear and turning it into her strength.

“Mira, come back to me. Please.” He pulled her in with a gentle hand at her hip, whispered only for her to hear.

“I’ll try.” She sighed softly, he knew she didn’t believe that.

“No, I need you to promise me Mira. Promise you’ll come back to me, please.” He was pleading with her, trying to give them both something to fight for… even if it was just a promise and nothing more, but by the maker and the heavens above… he wanted more.

She smiled, holding his face with both hands as he held her around the waist.

“I promise Cullen, I will fight until my last breath, I will come back to you.” She promised and with that she pulled him down to her level and pressed her forehead to his. “Now please, protect this Inquisition.”

 

He nodded, he had wanted to kiss her, to shout out the words that rattled in the bottom of his heart but he had a duty. They had a duty. And so, he tore himself away from her.

“Inquisition, follow Chancellor Roderick through the chantry.” He ordered forcefully, fore taking steps, asking for volunteers to set up the trebuchets.

“Herald… if you are meant for this, if the Inquisition is meant for this. I pray for you.” Roderick gasped as Cole lead him through the Chantry. Maker she hoped his prayers worked, she had a promise to keep.

Cullen jogged back towards her, soldiers and a few villagers filing past him and back into the town. “They’ll load the trebuchets. Keep the elder one’s attention until we’re above the tree line. If we are to have a chance – if you are to have a chance – Let that thing hear you.”  

 

**

 

 

The battle came in flashes, she remembers yelling a battle cry as she ran from the Chantry. Screaming at those soulless bastards to come get her.

Running.

She remembered dropping into stealth a soon as the beasts was down, helping Blackwall load and re-centre the trebuchet while taking the second’s rest to breathe. Then looking around in horror as theses thunderous footsteps came closer and closer.

“MIRA, BEHEMOTH!” Dorian yelled from over by his perimeter, setting up an ice wall as he fell back towards Bull.

“Shit, shit, shit. Fuck Dorian, freeze it! Bull try and smash that thing!”

“Trebuchet set, ready to load. WHAT THE HELL IS THAT!” Blackwall shouted, turning back into the fray only to face this giant, red crystalline monster!

“Do it like before Blackwall!” Mira snapped, dodging out of an archer’s shot and throwing her hook chain at him to move around the field into a better position.

“He wasn’t there Mira! She means smash it with your shield once I’ve frozen it!” Dorian snapped, sending a crackle of electricity across the field, frying some of their enemies in one move.

 

They worked together, both Mira and Blackwall attacking the beast from opposite sides, brining it down with a crackling thud. They did it but time was running out, the Trebuchet needed to be fired as soon as possible.

The Dragon roared again, it knew, the dragon knew what they were doing! It targeted them, letting loose a deafening roar before breathing tainted fire down at them.

 

“MOVE! GO! I’LL BE RIG-UMFF!” Mira yelled to her companions before a wave of dragon fire exploded something near her, knocking her back towards the trebuchet. She lost her daggers in the fall and her bearings as she tumbled back.

She had to go, she had to get out of here! She could hear that dragon getting closer before the final thundering impact of the beast landing blocked her exit. She glanced around, she couldn’t see a way out, couldn’t see her friends… it was just her against a Dragon…

 

“Enough!” came the imposing voice as he wielded a magic so strong it set her teeth on edge.

“Pretender. You toy with forces beyond your ken. No more.”

“What the hell are you? Why are you doing this?!” she barked, taking the moment of the creature’s patience to right herself.

“Mortals beg for truth they cannot have. It is beyond what you are. What I was. Know me, know what you have pretended to be.” The creature mocked,

 

“Exalt the elder one! The _will_ that is Corypheus!” he revealed, raising his hand towards Mira with an overwhelming sense of authority.

“You Will Kneel.” Corypheus commanded, his hand sparking with that same tainted power.

 

And Mira, Mira sneered, this creature she could not out fight, he was stronger, had her trapped but she was still her.

“You’re forcing this fight for no reason! So, you can just fuck off!” she barked back with her own strength.

 

“You will resist. You will always resist. It matters not.” He replied condescendingly… suddenly insulting the creature didn’t seems so smart a move.

He held up an orb, something powerful that sparked with red magic.

“I am here for the Anchor. The process of removing it begins now.” He snapped, releasing the energy and channelling it towards her mark.

 

It burned.

It burned, oh fuck it burned!’

 

“It is your fault, ‘Herald’ you interrupted a ritual year in the planning, and instead of dying, you stole its purpose.” Corypheus spoke, the same low, powerful tones as before.

“I do not know how you survived, but what marks you as ‘touched’, what you flail at rifts, I crafted to assault the very heavens.” Another surge of power.

 

Mira dropped to her knees, she knew she was about to scream. Maker it hurt so much! It burned all along her arm as the mark flared in blinding greens.

 

“And you used the Anchor to undo my work! The Gall!” there was a note of anger in his voice this time.

Mira’s pain shifted, he blamed her, she messed up his plans at the temple! Good, now she would mess him up.

She was almost curled around her arm now as it flared in greens and now reds and she raised her head, defiance clear in her eyes.

 

“I have this mark because you fucked up, so what was this thing meant to do!?” she shouted, fully expecting to go out any second now… but she saw something.

“It was meant to bring certainty where there is none. For you, the certainty that I would always come for it.” Corypheus snarled back before marching over to her and snatching her up off the ground, dangling her by her arm as he examined the mark… and then her face.

 

“I once breached the Fade in the name of another, to sever the Old Gods of the Empire in person.”  He snapped, dangling her off the ground like she weighed less than nothing.

“I found only chaos and corruption. Dead whispers. For a thousand years, I was confused. No more. I have gathered the will to return under no name but my own, to champion withered Tevinter and correct this blighted world.” He continued his monologue… all Mira could think was ‘boy this guy’s big.’

 

“Beg that I succeed, for I have seen the throne of the gods, and it was empty!” he revealed coldly before launching her in irritation towards the trebuchet.

Her back hit the frame, _fuck_ , but ultimately, she was still alive, still breathing.

 

“The Anchor is permanent, you have spoiled it with your stumbling.” He was gaining on her, intent on killing her now that he couldn’t get what he wanted.

There was a sword on the ground, left over from one of the soldiers. Mira grabbed it hurriedly, she knew what she was going to do, she just needed time. More time.

 

The dragon followed its master, growling with impatience, “So be it. I will begin again, find another way to give this world the nation – and god – it requires.”

Time. Just a little bit more!

She had a clear view of the valley from here and… Yes! There! A signal! They made it! They were clear!

 

“And you. I will not suffer even and unknowing rival. You _must_ die.” Corypheus growled in finality.

 

Mira was ready, she was prepared all she had to do was make this count!

She laughed, because really, what else was she going to do! She took her stance, defiant till the end, or so he would think, raising her sword in front of her.

“Your arrogance blinds you, Good to know.” She smirked, the feature quickly turned into a vicious snarl.

“If I’m dying – It’s not today!” she growled as she finally struck!

 

She turned away from the creature and his dragon, shoving the heel of her boot into the leaver holding the Trebuchet back, letting the machine fire far above them. Both master and his dragon turned to look at the chaos now swiftly gaining on them from atop the mountain.

Mira had seconds, she took one look at her distracted enemies before she turned and bolted! She dropped the sword as it only slowed her down, the dragon roared behind her!

Shit.

Shit! Where was it! She’d seen the tunnel a few weeks back!

The avalanche was closing in! She could feel the weight of all the rock and snow gaining on her.

Shit, shit, shit…

                

THERE!

She ran faster than she ever thought possible, leaping for the barely covered hole in the ground, her back connecting with a wooden plank as she tumbled painfully into the hole.

                                           


	11. Hopeless

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everything goes to shit.  
> Angst abound my friends, fair warning.

 

Chapter 11 Hopeless

           

It was dark and cold, and oh god she hurt.

She landed badly, she could feel that some of her ribs had broken in the fall… and oh, she was bleeding… rather heavily in fact.

Shit.

Her eyes dipped closed, lying there in the cold, in the ice and debris of Haven. Maker she wanted to stay there, just curl up here into oblivion…. Just rest… finally rest.

_Mira, come back to me. Please._

_Promise me Mira._

_Promise you’ll come back to me…_

Her eyes snapped open, she promised. Maker she had to move, Now.

 

Slowly she dragged herself together, pulling her coat tighter around herself as she stood, looking for something to stem the bleeding.

Step by step she walked through the dark dank cave, the drips of water and howling winds echoed around her.

She’d lost her daggers in the fall, only managing to save a small boot knife as her only weapon and the Mark… or Anchor as Corypheus called it, was burning something fierce.

Then, there was a wail, a screech that set Mira’s teeth on edge…

 

Demons. A Rift… Fuck!

 

Her mark burned, it felt like it was being pulled towards the rift but this time instead of _Close, end, seal._ She felt something draw out, long, containing, like drawing poison from a wound.

The power surged from her wrist, welling up around the demons, sucking the very will from them before slamming them back into the fade, sealing it shut in the same move.

Effective…

But fuck if that didn’t burn!

 

She trudges on, out into a snow storm of her own making… she had a promise to keep, and she’d be damned if she let a little snow make a liar of her now.

**

 

He felt hollow, like eventually he would crumple in on himself if he stopped moving…

He sent her to die…

He sent the Herald of Andraste… the woman he-… oh Maker…

They needed to keep moving, no guilt or cold biting wind could slow them they needed to flee. The guards he and Rylen organised were guiding the villagers through the tunnels and out into the mountains, while Leliana’s scouts salvaged whatever they could to source carts and supplies, loading the injured and weakened onto them as soon as they exited the tunnels.

 

Cullen stayed at the rear making sure that he got everyone he could out of Haven, he promised her.

 

“That’s the last of them Commander, everyone’s out!” called one of his men.

 

He nodded sharply before turning back towards the village. The last trebuchet hadn’t fired yet but, _there,_ where he knew the weapon stood, he could see sparks of wicked green and red… Mira… She was fighting that thing.

He had to send her a signal, tell her that they were clear!

 

“I need something to signal the herald! Where are the mages?!” he snapped, eyes glued to the scene below in the village, Mira’s energy pouring out, centred in one spot.

“They’re all tending to the wounded Ser-“

“Then get me a bloody bow and a torch!”

 

The man he’d been talking to quickly snatched a bow off one of the scouts nearby along with their half empty quiver.

Cullen reached under his armour to tear a strip from the bottom of his shirt. He wrapped around the sharp head of the arrow before one the soldier finally caught on and doused it with whatever he had in his hipflask.

He kept the green in sight, glancing around he realised he need a better position and jogged up the hill… there.

The soldier followed with the torch wordlessly, he knew what the Commander was doing and what was expected of him in this trying time. The soldier, a broad young man, held the torch out for the Commander as he needed.

The flame caught, the arrow aimed… and Cullen prayed. He prayed that she would see it, that she would find a way… the green lights of her mark disappeared as soon as he took aim… Maker let her live.

 

Please.

Please let her live.

He couldn’t see her, he didn’t know if she-- fear was close to paralysing him.

 

He pulled back on the bow as far as it would bend, arrow notched and burning brightly before he loosed, sending his signal soring into the sky.

Then moments later his whole world collapsed.

The trebuchet fired… the mountain started to thunder down upon the village, taking the chantry first, collapsing the route they escaped from. The dragon, protected its master and escaped into the night… just before the trebuchet… the same trebuchet where she had been last was swallowed by the avalanche.

 

His heart caught in his throat.

Maker he’d just killed her, he’d just killed the woman he-

 

“Commander! What just happened?” Cassandra’s voice came snapping across his thoughts.

The bow slipped from his grasp and into the snow, the soldier from before had the good sense to take it and his leave, he seen the look on the Commander’s face… he knew what that look meant and he knew he had to help the others now.

“Commander- Cullen?” Cassandra softened as she saw him.

She’d seen the same look on the victims of Despair Demons. The loss in his eyes, the slightly slack jaw, pain, sorrow and guilt, slashed across his face like scars.

 

“I killed her… I just sent her to die.” He whispered tightly, voice no louder that a breath of wind.

Cassandra examined the ruin that was haven before turning back to her friend.

 

“Cullen, you didn’t, you don’t know if she… she may have escaped.” She tried to comfort.

Cullen reached out, fisting his hand against her shoulder as he looked at her.

 

“No, you don’t understand! I love her\- I love her and I sent her to-” his plea broke when the rising nausea grew too much. He turned away to empty what little he had left in his belly… what little he had to eat with Mira earlier that evening.

 

Cassandra was at a loss, she didn’t even know Cullen had feelings for her and now, Maker he was falling apart in front of her from grief!

There was shuffling from behind them, someone approaching, Cassandra turned, drawing her sword at the unknown party in a pre-emptive defence.

It was only a boy, a strange boy in a large hat.

Cullen looked at him, while the boy looked back…

“He’s Sad- no- not sad. Hollow, empty, the one bright light in his life is lost and he thinks it’s his fault.” The boy spoke, airily and cautious.

Both Cullen and Cassandra looked at him in confusion.

“What are you talking about! She was out there because I asked her to, I saw the light go out before the mountain fell! How can it not be my fault?” Cullen snapped at the boy, after wiping his mouth on the corner of his coat.

“You think it’s because you love her that she’s gone. That’s not true, she’s not Audrey.” The boy continued, this time hopefully.

“You make no sense, just leave me.” He sighed with finality, dismissing the boy as he turned back towards Haven.

“Wait… that didn’t work. _Forget.”_

Something strange washed over them, a sort of déjà vu, Cullen saw the ruins of Haven, felt the guilt, the heartache… the loss. Cassandra saw the pain of her friend, the loss he felt for the Herald was unusual but he said it was he who sent her.

“She’s not dead. She found a way, she made a promise Cullen. Now you must keep yours. You promised her.” The boy told him simply before disappearing back towards the main group.

Cullen straighten up, he didn’t have time for this, he needed to keep his promise to her, Maker even if it was the last thing he ever did, he wouldn’t fail her now.

 

“Cullen? What promises was that boy talking about?” Cassandra asked after a few moments, she waited as he gathered himself.

“I promised to protect this Inquisition… and she promised she’d come back to me.” He told her, voice rough with emotion, longing and exhaustion.

 

Cassandra was at his back, urging him onwards, helping to guide these people to safety, to keep his promise. They’d managed to save more of them than he’d expected, injuries had been sustained but with the help of the mages Mira recruited they were being tended to.

“Commander, we need to set camp soon. My scouts say there’s suitable area just beyond the pass. Easily defendable and… Commander?”

Cullen didn’t even recognise who was talking to him, Cassandra? Rylen? Another recruit or a scared villager…

He snapped up to look at who spoke, Leliana, and took in the information.

“Camp, yes.” He looked over to his left where Rylen was helping a cart of injured and elderly along the path.

“I’ll check with Rylen to organise a watch patrol, we also need to know how much supplies we managed to bring. We need your scouts to work with the soldiers guarding the supply cart to help do a run down.” He offered, getting only a nod in response from Leliana before he set off to inform Rylen.

 

Maker he was just replaying that moment again and again in his mind, her face as she realised that she would most likely face death, of their promises to each other. He would protect this Inquisition, but in the meantime, he would pray, pray that he hadn’t just lost the one woman who he wanted… the one woman he’d grown to admire and respect.

 

 **

 

She hurt, and she was certain her ribs were broken… and bleeding, but maker she was too cold to care. She walked, trudging through the snow, using the anchor as her own personal light to illuminate the snow in front of her. She could hear wolves howling through the wind…. Or was that just the wind.

 

It was getting harder and harder to walk, to keep going forwards. She just wanted to stop, take a rest… a very long rest, just lie down in the snow and forget everything that just happened.

The broken ribs, the possible concussion… that fucking Corypheus and that fucking dragon.

Maker, what did she do to deserve this. Kill the Divine or something!

 

Wait…

Fuck, maybe?

 

She stumbled pulling herself out of her daydream as her ankle twisted awkwardly with a disturbing crack.

Fuck.

Fuck! She was going to fucking die out here! She was barely making any headway in this snow and now she’d broken her ankle!

 

She fell to her knees, exhausted and in pain, a sob broke past her lips as she caught her breath.

 

_Promise, you promised, Mira._

 

Another sob, she did, she’d promised something she wasn’t able to keep. There was nothing she hated more than breaking her promises.

_I’ll love and protect you Finn-_ Broken.

_I’ll be honest –_ Broken.

Do mages go the Makers side? Would she? Would she rest with the elven creators or return to the stone like the dwarves?

 

_Stop it_ , Mira Trevelyan you are not fucking dying today!

She kept moving, one foot after the other. Just get to the top of this bloody mountain, just find somewhere sheltered and then you can rest.

 

She stumbled again, almost falling into the snow. She could see a pass in between the mountain, there she could take shelter. She could rest.

Just a little further.

Just a little more.

**

 

The camp was being set up, everyone pitching in to do their part. Most of the villagers were in shock but they helped each other, mages were tending to the wounded, people making stews and handing out blankets or spare clothes.

He couldn’t stand around, he needed to find her. Their Herald.

“Cassandra, I’m going to look for her.” Cullen told her firmly, his sword was at his hip, furs piled over his shoulders and supplies on his back.

“Not alone you’re not. Cullen, I know you feel something for her, but getting yourself killed wandering the night isn’t going to help.” Cassandra frowned back, before also grabbing a supply bag and sending for a few scouts and a healer to accompany them.

“I need to find her; the Inquisition needs her.” He reiterated, Maker not having her here was tearing him up. He should have been more prepared, done something _anything_ to protect her, but instead he turned tail and fled with the villagers like a scared pup.

 

As they searched for their Herald, Cassandra watched over Cullen, a silent yet supportive companion. She knew something was different, something deeper than him just looking for the Herald.

Cullen himself felt hollower than before, it had been hours, they’d fled, the camp had been set and still she was nowhere to be seen. He couldn’t help the horrid thoughts that she hadn’t escaped the village, or if she did she’d been injured, or lost in the snow, or captured or any number of other horrible things that could have befallen the woman he loves.

_Shit._

 

He loves her. Oh, the maker must hate his blackened soul, he drove away the first woman he loved and now he’s killed the second.

 

**

 

She reached the top, falling to her knees in exhaustion as she struggled to get up again. Maybe she could somehow trick herself to move another few feet. Just a little bit more.

She couldn’t, she was so tired. Her ankle broken, blood seeping through the wound on her side. Maker, dying would be a welcome reprieve right now.

With that single thought, all hope left her. She just wanted to go home, to feel safe, for once in her fucking life!

She wanted her home, a little house on the hill in the ass end of the Hinterlands, where no one could find her. She wanted her garden, her bear skin rug by a warm hearth… she wanted someone to love… before that would have been Finn but now…

 

It didn’t matter now…

 

Nothing mattered now. She let go, falling numb into the snow.

 

**

“The scouts report that the storm has covered all tracks coming out of Haven, there has been no signs of her Commander.” Cassandra informed him tentatively.

“No, she’s out there.” Cullen rejected, pressing forwards, maker he would not stop until he found her… in whatever condition that was.

 

Something moved in the distance… a dark lump… a beast, a rock?

“There! It’s her!” came Cullen’s frantic shout.

He dropped his torch, sprinting to her as he found a reserve of unknown energy. As he ran he couldn’t take his eyes from her, she was half covered in snow but he would know that red hair anywhere. He dropped to the ground next to her, desperately pulling her out of the snow and into his lap before biting his glove off to check her pulse.

_Please, please still be alive._

 

He had to calm himself to find it, it was very weak, he could feel her breathing rattle and blood slicked the hand he had around her waist. Cullen shouted to the mages that followed to heal her, in his desperation he almost didn’t care if they had to use blood magic to do it, just as long as they didn’t let her die!

He held her tightly as the mages worked, a finger on her pulse as Cassandra ordered a runner back to the camp to set up a space for her…

_She came back._

 

Eventually the mages managed to stabilise her enough for Cullen to carry her back to camp. He held her firmly to his chest, still not quite able to process the sheer amount of relief he felt, the worry, the churning knot that was his heart.

_She came back, she’s alive._ He had to keep telling himself, the woman in his arms survived… against all odds. He thanked the Maker that he was not cruel today, that he watched over her return…and prayed for courage and strength for her to heal.

 

**

It was so cold, it hurt, Ice seeping into her bones and blood… but there was something… strong, familiar, lulling her into a sense of relief. Maybe it was just her brain trying to trick her. Maybe this was it for her.

She could feel her body stinging with cold, solid weight wrapped around her middle cradling her like a child. But distantly she could hear something? The voice of the Maker perhaps? Would she even be allowed?

 

“You came back Mira, I’ve got you.” Quiet, the sound floating just on the edge of her recognition… _she knew that voice._

 

 

Things drifted after that, everything hazy, ethereal, and vague.

The pain was almost distant but she could still feel it, like a slight stinging sensation under her skin.

 

She was left drifting, floating through maker knows what. The voice that had assured her was gone, filled with a static buzzing that rang through her ears. But slowly, ever so damn slowly, awareness crept back to her.

Sounds of people walking, of the wind whipping around her ears, quiet voices, and the clink of metal.

 

She tried to move, to open her eyes and turn her head, to find out where she’d gone.

 

And she couldn’t…

 

Worry prickled through her. She tried again, to open her eyes. It was like she’d been sitting in a warm bath, all awareness of her body had floated away.

_Maker, what happened? Am I trapped? Captured? Am I … Am I dead? Is this what death feels like? Nothingness?_

She could feel pure panic rising in her like a wave, consuming her, swallowing all she was with fear. Desperately she tried to open her eyes, focusing so intently… this wasn’t right, this wasn’t happening.

_No, no, no… Maker help me._

 

**

He waited, made sure the healers had everything they needed and tried to stay out of the way while they worked. _She survived, she came back_ , his brain kept telling him. He had to protect her, now that he knew what he felt, Maker the guilt of leaving her to that monster was eating him alive.

She was sleeping now, Solas had put a minor paralysis spell on her in case she started to thrash and break open her wounds. She was still, calm, but still bruised and bloody. He was currently heating up some snow in a pot at the entrance to her tent, to clean the blood from her face and hopefully clean her bandages.

 

That was when he noticed it, over the noise of the boiling water. Her breathing increased sharply, interrupted by shallow, hitching sobs. He came back to her side quickly, her eyes were open and watering, she looked terrified! Maker she couldn’t move! She probably didn’t know why or even where the hell she was!

 

“Mira, Mira it’s alright, Solas put a spell on you to stop you moving, it’s alright, you’re safe.” He told her calmly. He placed his hand gently on her shoulder to try and calm her

 

She’d woken up, bleary and sore… and most importantly immobile. _No, no, no, no. something must have happened, Maker I can’t move! What’s happening, Why, Is this…_

 

Cullen watched as she only sobbed some more, tears welling up in her beautiful blue eyes and spilling out faster, blurring her vision. He tried to concentrate, to summon a power he hadn’t held in so long, for it held a taste of Lyrium. He could feel the pain well up through his sinuses and washing through the rest of his skull, sharp white pain as the Cleanse tried to pull on the little Lyrium he still had clinging to his blood.

Blood trickled down from his nose as the Cleanse pulled from him and into the spell holding her down.

 

Mira startled under his hand, as if she was a panicked and cornered animal. He wiped the blood away from his nose as she took a shuddering breath. He was surprised by her hand lashing out to grab at his mantle, pulling him down to her.

“Cu-Cullen I- *sniffle*- I-I-” she started, still to panicked to breathe properly. Choked off sobs rattling out at the end of each breath.

“It’s alright, it’s alright, you’re safe, I’m here.” He told her, trying to calm her as she pulled him down towards her. The cot creaked as he put his weight on it, the blankets that covered her saved her from the worst of his armour.  He held her as her cries lessened with each breath. Her fingers wound into his hair and mantle as she clung to him like a lifeline.

“I thought I was dead. I thought I failed.” She whimpered, burying her face into his neck.

“You didn’t fail Mira, you came back.” He whispered soothingly. He simply held her, stroking her hair until she calmed, although she still stayed pressed to him when she did. Maker it felt so good just to hold her, to feel her solid form pressed against him, even through his armour, was a relief.

 

They both stayed like that for a while, both taking relief in being alive. But eventually the state of Mira’s injuries caught up with her as she tried to move, mainly the broken ribs and gash to her right side.

“Slowly now. You were badly injured when we found you.” He warned, encouraging her to lay back down as he re-arranged the blankets and single pillow.

“How bad? And how did I even get here?”

He stalled as he watched her pull the blankets up to her chin, trying to block out the cold. The sight almost made him smile, made her real.

 

“Cassandra and I went to search for you. I found you in the snow a few miles from camp, you were unconscious, I had to pull you out of the snow and carry you back. The healers managed to cure some of your wounds but they were so tired by the time we found you, Solas sent them to rest, he said he’ll see to your injuries personally when you wake… I can go fetch him now if you wish?” he offered starting to stand. That’s when her hand grasped into his mantle again, keeping him sat in her cot.

 

“Wait, don’t go. I’ll be fine.” There was a whisper of panic in her voice, she found the idea of him leaving more terrifying and painful than her ribs.

He hummed, sinking down to lay beside her, trying to make himself as small as possible… and failing.

“Ah, I’m sorry. The armour must be terribly cold my lady.” He spoke quietly, as if anything louder would break whatever warmth had settled over the pair.

 

She smiled weakly at him, “Did you really carry me back here? All up against that freezing armour and manly chest of yours?”

Cullen blushed, however it mixed well with his wind burnt cheeks making it not that noticeable. “I did yes, Cassandra helped, we also went with scouts and a healer but uh… sorry about the amour.”

Mira laughed suddenly before hissing and swearing at the pain of her ribs. He rolled her to lay flat, hoping to alleviate the pain.

 

“How is that funny?” he frowned, noting how cold she still was and turned to throw another log on the fire, before returning to her side.

She didn’t respond, still calming down from her outburst. He was confused, hurt almost, _how did she not know why?_

“Mira, I thought I killed you, I sent up that signal and watched the avalanche swallow Haven. I sent you out there with no escape plan, no fucking hope… just a promise. I wasn’t about to break my promise to you.” He hissed, his frown deepening between his brow as Mira listened.

“I-I… Forgive me Mira. This is all my fault, I should have found a way-”

 

“Cullen,” Mira interrupted reaching out to cup his jaw with her cold fingers. He quickly put his hand over hers trying to warm her up.

“Cullen, it’s not your fault. There was no way for everyone to get out alive without using me as a distraction. Corypheus, the _thing_ that attacked us, wanted me, wanted the anchor. Nobody could have foreseen that monster and even still, everyone here is alive because of us.” She assured softly, honestly there was a slight wheeziness to her voice that worried him.

“Mira… if I lost you I-”

 

She interrupted him again, this time catching his sad eyes with hers more intensely, “You didn’t lose me Cullen, I made you a promise and I try very hard not to break my promises.” Her soft smile melted him from the inside out. _Maker I love you_ … he wished he could say it, but this was not the time for it.

 

A soft rustle came from the opening of the tent, Cullen broke away from Mira’s to assess and possibly protect her, hand ready on his pommel.

“Ah, Commander. I see you’re still here, and the Herald’s awake? How are you?” Solas asked, striding through, it wasn’t often that the elf showed an emotion other than melancholy but right now he looked exhausted and worn down, his steps heavier and motions less fluid.

 

“I’m…” her reply drifted off, her attention obviously elsewhere. As Cullen turned back to see what was wrong, he caught her staring at him, a brief look of longing flashed over her face before she glanced away.

 

“I’m fine Solas, no need to worry.” She finished dismissively, although the wheeze was still there she’s slapped on one of her reassuring smiles that Cullen knew to be a façade.

“Mira… you’ve got at least three broken ribs.” Cullen frowned down at her, raising himself to watch over her. Solas just chuckled behind them as he prepared himself.

“I… oh yeah, Sorry. Do you need to go now?” she asked quietly.

 

“I should organise rations and supply chains.” He replied automatically, but the look on her face pulled at him, _Maker she didn’t want to be alone…_ or maybe she just wanted him close by… _no, stop that foolish thought!_

“I’ll stop by later if you wish?” the words were out of his mouth faster than his admonishing thought could take them back.

“Only if you can. Don’t worry if you’re busy.” With that Mira’s attention was taken up by Solas, who started to explain the depth of her injuries and probe her with questions about this _Corypheus._

As he stepped out the cold night air, cut through him, but so did relief. She survived, she came back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> He loves her! He loves her! and oh boy do they have a whole bag of issues to get through.


	12. Hope

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mira unwillingly brings hope to the camp, Cullen worries, and Mira freaks out about emotions.

 

_Chapter 12 - Hope._

**__ **

 

It started with Mother Giselle, who was there when she awoke the second time. Cullen didn’t come back after Solas saw to her wounds and so the elf stayed, talking about Corypheus and that Orb of his.

“What would you have me tell them? This isn’t what we asked them to do!” Cullen’s voice raised above the rest of the camp.

 

_Ah, that’s where he got to._

 

“We cannot simply ignore this! We must find a way!” Cassandra roared back, pulling Mira from her sluggish state.

“And who put you in charge? We need a consensus, or we have nothing!” Cullen snapped back, there was anger in his voice and… _fear._

“Please, we must use reason! Without the infrastructure of the inquisition, we’re hobbled!” Josephine interrupted trying to calm the argument.

“That can’t come from nowhere!” Again, Cullen argued. Mira didn’t even know what they were arguing about, but she knew they needed to stop, even if it was just for her headache.

“She didn’t say it could!” Leliana retaliated, defending Josie from Cullen’s irritated exasperation.

“Enough! This is getting us nowhere!” Cassandra yelled, voice harsh and sharp, almost as if it could draw blood.

“Well we’re agreed on that much!” the voices were moving further away, she just wanted them to stop, she just wanted… she was still so cold.

 

“Shh, you need rest.” Came the gentle voice from beside her. Mira looked up to find Mother Giselle sitting quietly next to her. Normally when Mira saw nun’s in full Chantry attire she would recoil, remember her family and Ostiwick but she was so tired, so cold and the Mother wasn’t a threat right now.

“They’ve been at it for hours.” Mira spoke quietly, her voice hoarse from lack of use.

“They have that luxury, thanks to you. The enemy could not follow, and with time to doubt, we turn to blame.” The Mother sighed, “Infighting may threaten as much as this Corypheus.”

“The only thing yelling gets us is a headache… another headache.” Mira grumbled as she turned over to get into a better position, she hurt. _Everywhere._ Even with Solas’s healing spells slowly working through her, she ached, right down in her bones.

 

“They know, but our situation- your situation – is complicated. Our leaders struggle because of what we survivors witnessed. We saw our defender stand…and fall. And now, we have seen her _return._ ” The Mother emphasised as Mira decided that no position was going to work so she slowly sat up.

“The more the enemy is beyond us, the more miraculous your actions appear and the more our trials seem ordained.” The Mother paused before pulling on a serious face. “That is hard to accept, no? What ‘We’ have been called to endure? What ‘We’, perhaps, must come to believe?”

 

Mira stared at the Mother, properly spaced out, deep in thought. She felt lost, even more so than when she first tumbled out of the rift with no memory, and this bloody, stupid mark on her hand.

 

“Mother, - I-I’m not… I just don’t see how what I believe matters. I’m not the Herald, I’m not anyone worthy of this…” She pushed, there was to many terrible things all wrapped up with faith. Her family used it as a means of profit, of corruption… of control. The Chantry uses it as an excuse to lock away Mages, to hunt down ‘Apostates’ and burn them to the ground, steal scared children from their mother’s bosoms and… _she couldn’t do this._

She had to stop to take a ragged breath, “Lies or not, Corypheus is a real, physical threat. We can’t match that with hope alone.” Mira sighed as she went to take her leave, slowly making her way out of the small makeshift infirmary.

 

Mira had to think, she had no idea what to do an ancient darkspawn magister wanted her dead, an army of Templars wanted her dead… and now she was yet again caught up in something beyond her control.

“My dear, with all due respect. _Hope_ , is something we all need… and _hope_ is what you represent... to so many here. Please consider this my lady, without you. These people here, they have no hope.” The Mother spoke, gently but firmly, Mira knew she spoke truths, but the reality of those truths… was hard to comprehend.

 

With that the Mira sighed and stood, she had no words to reply with as she hobbled towards the post holding up the tent. She saw them all there… people she would call her friends if she could… and Cullen, stood, fidgeting like he did when he was unsure… they all looked so lost.

                                                                                                                                                                                

And then… a voice, strong and sure. Lilted in song… a hymn Mira had only heard in her childhood, when her nanny sang it at her bedside, before everything to shit.

_Shadows fall and hope has fled,_

Steel your heart, the dawn will come.

The Night is young and the path is dark,

Look to the sky, for one day soon

The Dawn will come…

 

Mother Giselle stood by Mira, by the Herald of Andraste for the world to see. Hope, shining like a beacon, waiting for the right moment to bring it to bare.

Leliana’s voice joined, adding the beautiful notes of a trained bard, and then another, more and more people started to sing with them.

But one voice caught her ear, more firmly than the rest, deeper, more meaningful than all the rest.

Cullen’s.

She turned to look, more like stare, he sang with a passion she hadn’t seen in all her years. He watched her, sang to her. Like she was the only person he was singing for.

 

People were literally kneeling before her and she kept glancing back to him, in shock and kind of in awe.  The hymn ended and the people slowly went back to their duties, but something different had descended over the camp… the _hope_ Mother Giselle had spoken of, it seemed to be imbibed into them. If this was what people needed her to be… maybe she could help? In whatever way, she could.

 

She started to make her way through the crowd, she knew she was ignoring Solas’s medical advice of _rest_ , but there was a very particular person she needed to see right now. She tried to look for her Commander but by the time the crowds parted she’d lost sight of him. Sighing she looked around for someone to ask, although the only person around was Cassandra, who would surely send her back to the infirmary… _she’d have to risk it._

“Cassandra, do you know-“

“Herald! You should be resting, Maker knows what the Commander would think! He was beside himself!” Cassandra gasped, quickly trying to corral Mira back towards the infirmary… and Mother Giselle.

“Cass- Cassandra! I’m looking for Cullen, do you know where he’s gone?” Mira cut in quickly as she hobbled passed Cassandra’s corralling attempts.

Cassandra paused, seemingly surprised by the question.

“I sent him to his tent, he already worked himself so hard to find you. He was going to collapse, so I sent him to rest… Why do you wish to see him?”

 

It was Mira’s turn to be caught by surprise, she hadn’t considered the reason _why_ she wanted to see him, only that it was important. He made her feel safe… protected, and that was something she needed right now.

 

“I-I It’s important, I won’t bother him and I’ll make sure he gets some rest!” she defended, quickly stashing away the silly notion of _needing protection,_ the only one who could protect her, **was her** , to think anything else was to get complacent…. And that was the quickest way to getting someone killed... _like Finn._

“I’ll show you, I’m sure he’d be glad for your company. I’ve known the Commander for a few years now… never have I seen him as determined or as worried as he did when we searched for you.” Cassandra said softly in her attempt to make small talk.

“Worried?”

“Yes, he was… I’ve never seen him like that before. He spoke of a promise? Do you know what he was talking about?”

 

Mira nodded, before her ankle went, causing her to stumble into Cassandra for support. The warrior caught her effortlessly and continued to help her move after a few seconds to make sure she was alright.

 

“When Roderick told us of the tunnels leading out of Haven, we knew there needed to be a distraction to give everyone enough time to escape. Cullen offered to come with me but I make him promise to get everyone out while I provided the distraction… any logical person would have known it would be a suicide mission… but he made me promise to come back, and I do so hate to break my promises.”

“I am glad you did not have to. Even after all our trials, it is a relief to have you back with us Mira, I pray that this is a sign for better fortunes to come. Now, this is the Commander’s tent, one has also been set up for you further down the row when you need it. Good night my lady.” Cassandra nodded as she left, making sure Mira was well enough to make her own way towards the tent.

 

 

“Cullen? Are you still up, it’s me?” Mira called through the closed tent flaps. There was light coming from inside but she thought it may be polite to check.

After a few moments came a faint rustle and then Cullen’s startled face pulling back the flaps of the tent as he looked at her, his face a picture of twisted relief and blatant worry.

“Mira? What are you- you should be resting- and maker’s breath you’re not wearing a cloak! Aren’t you cold? Sore? Come here.” Cullen frowned, guiding her into his tent as he quickly sat her down on his cot, and kneeled to wrapped a soft fur around her shoulders before she could even squeak a response.

“You should be resting Mira; didn’t they show you where your tent- Oh Maker I said I’d come back! Andraste’s ass I’m sorry. I got so caught up- and then Cassandra ordered me to- I’m _so sorry._ ” He rambled out quickly, it was clear he was exhausted. Bags under his eyes, skin looking all the more pale and interesting.

 

“Cullen, it’s alright. I saw you singing and came to find you, Cassandra already told me she shoved you off to bed, she tried to do the same to me.” She smiled softly, even as Cullen continued to fidget with the fur, making sure it was wrapped around her comfortably to keep her warm.

“That’s because you should be resting Mira.” He chuckled as Mira caught his hands to stop his fidgeting, now he just absently stroked his thumbs over the backs of her cold hands.

“Mmm, you’re probably right. But I can’t sleep with Mother Giselle watching over me. She’ll keep talking about hope and witnessing divine events and trying to make me answer deep and meaningful questions. * _Sigh*_ once a night is enough thanks.”

“Not sure I understand, but alright. How about I show you to your tent, I’ll make sure that the Mother isn’t hiding underneath the cot for you.” He teased, standing to let his knees pop, expecting her to follow. But she stayed put, looking slight shy and anxious, as she pulled her red hair over her shoulder to smooth repeatedly.

 

“Actually, I was hoping I could stay here with you? I mean I can sleep on the floor, you need the cot more! And I promise I won’t be a bother, and only if you- if you want to- I just don’t want to… I don’t want to be alone… and I feel safer here with you.” She admitted after a mild internal panic.

_There, she said it. He- Cullen – this one bloody person, made her feel safer than she’d felt in years._

Cullen stared at her with surprise, _she wanted to stay with him? He made her feel safe?_ He watched her fidget anxiously, her hair now wrapped haphazardly around her fingers as she waited for his response, glancing everywhere around the tent but to his face. _Maker, could she get anymore adorable?_

 

“Mira, you’re never a bother. And thank you for saying you feel safe with me… knowing you and what we’ve been through, that’s probably not an easy thing to come by. You’re more than welcome to stay with me, whenever you want. I’m here for you.” He told her sincerely.

“Thank you, Cullen. Here I’ll sleep on the floor, you take the cot.” She moved, shedding the fur from her shoulders as she went to stand, only to be stopped by Cullen’s big warm hand on her shoulder. Caching her in the motion  and gently pushed her back down onto the cot.

 

“No, you stay there. I’ll just head over to your tent and bring over the cot and extra furs I had put out for you.”  He chuckled softly when she looked up at him in surprise.

“Extra furs?”

“I-I thought you might get cold.” he stammered quickly before ducking out on his mission.

 

Mira chuckled to herself. _He was so lovely, exactly like a knight in shining armour, swooping down to save her from misery and the danger of being cold!_

Cullen returned quickly, angling the already made cot through the tent flaps while balancing the pile of furs on top. _He wasn’t kidding about extra furs._ He set the cot down awkwardly, looking around the tent to where he could angle it.

 

“Could we push the two together? And um sleep, like before?” Mira asked suddenly, maker she was blushing before the words even left her mouth. _Could she sound anymore needy?_

“You wish to snuggle down like a mouse again?” he grinned, already moving the cot closer.

“Like a what?”

“A mouse, a very cute mouse.” He chuckled, laying down one of the furs over the wooden poles separating the two cots.

Mira laughed at that, “As long as I’m a cute mouse then.”

 

Cullen removed his armour as Mira set up the furs and pillow, there was only one so they’d have to share. _Or Mira could just use him as a pillow, he wasn’t objecting to that._

As he lay down, Mira had already wrapped one of the large furs around her shoulders and was trying to find a way to fit comfortably near him. She seemed hesitant to take up too much space, even though he knew what she really wanted. He tossed the last fur over the both of them and in the movement, pulled her onto his cot to rest against his chest.

 

She froze at the movement and he suddenly thought that he may have over stepped his bounds… but she let out a long sigh of relief before curling into him. Her knee sliding between his and her hands pressed up to the front of his chest.

 

He looked down to her, all fiery red hair and warmth, she looked up to him and smiled, her nose pushing and tracing along his neck as she snuggled in. A press of lips, a short tingly connection, highlighted by little puffs of air from her nose as she kissed his neck. The warmth of that connection spread all through his body, a tingly bliss, happy and safe. He squeezed his arms around her tighter in response.

“Thank you, Cullen.” Was the last thing she murmured before they fell asleep. Both far too exhausted to say anything else, but both feeling better, calmer for each other’s presence.

**

That sleeping arrangement held, Mira would move over to his tent sometime after everyone went to bed, careful not to be noticed or caught. Jokingly she’d told Cullen that their soldiers needed more training on how to spot assassins, he agreed but then pointed out that it would be far more likely for someone to start asking questions about _this , _whatever this was?

 

She didn’t answer that question… And she didn’t come back the next night… or the night after that.

 

Cullen was kicking himself. He missed her, missed her warmth, missed the little murmurs she made when she dreamed, maker he even missed the way he hair smelled under his nose. It wasn’t until he found out she wasn’t actually sleeping, just drinking too many stamina potions, and doing the jobs of 8 bloody scouts, did he go to her. He promised to not ask questions before he bundled her up and brought her to bed.

 

This was comfort, security, safety and she refused to make it anything else! She couldn’t make it anything else… not when they were all at risk of dying on this bloody mountain. She wasn’t blind, she could see Cullen felt something. But whether he thought of her as a new charge to protect, or as a friend, or maybe he just wanted to fuck her… this wasn’t the time.

Yes okay, Solas apparently had their solution. He’d told her of a fortress just waiting for someone to take it, about a week’s travel into the mountains from where they were… but she’d believe it when she saw it. And now they’re currently two days out as a camp and Mira was beyond tired of waiting with no solid results.

 

Cullen caught her in his - _their-_ tent, stealing one of the furs… and his belt knife!

“What are you doing?” he growled. She was dressed in her poorly mended armour with a scout’s bow and quiver strapped to her back as she packed a small satchel.

She glanced up at him in surprise, before glancing at the knife in her hand and quickly hiding it behind her back in a childish manoeuvre.

 

“Mira-“ he started, fully prepared to lecture her if she was going to continue to act like a child.

 

“I can’t keep waiting Cullen. I’m going ahead with Solas. I need to make sure we’re leading these people to the right place.” She told him as she continued to pack the bag, the knife now suspiciously absent from her grasp.

“Who else is going?” he asked absently grabbing his own bag.

She frowned at his action, “Varric, Sera and Bull.”                                                                                                                                                                                

“Your team is unbalanced, I’m coming with you.” He replied simply.

 

“What! Cullen-“

“You’ve got three archers including you, one mage and one warrior. I’m coming with you.”

“You don’t need to come Cullen, you’re needed here, in the camp!” She argued, now standing up to oppose him.

 

“Rylen is more than capable of organising the civilians to follow. And besides, Mira you’re still recovering… if anything were to happen to you-“ he spoke softly, his hand reaching out for hers.

“Cullen-” she interrupted.

 

“No, listen. You are too important, to me, to the Inquisition.” He told her firmly, hands coming up to her shoulders to hold her still, slowly sliding down her arms. She paused, a slight colour came to her cheeks as he spoke.

“So, I’m coming with you Mira and we’re going to find this fortress Solas speaks of but first…” he paused, using his height to look down to her. She looked up at him and felt small, protected, and most importantly more than a little bit aroused. His lips met her ear as his hands slid up her back. She stood there frozen, breath caught in her throat like a trapped bird.

“I believe, that this is _my knife._ ” He drawled in her ear, feeling her shiver at the timber of his voice. Deftly he plucked the blade from the back of her trousers, fingers grazing her skin as he moved, lingering for a moment before he quickly stepped away from her, returning to packing his own bag.

 

 

She stood there shocked, her face red and mouth gaping like a fish. She tried for several moments to form a response

“Fine. _Fine_! Fine.” She squeaked finally before grabbing her bag and storming out of the tent, her blush fully covering her face.

She went to find a horse, but as she went she could hear Cullen and his smug laughter echoing from inside his - _their_ \- tent.

 

**

Surprisingly to Mira, Cullen had brought Cassandra along, saying that she was just as invested as any of them to find _Skyhold._ Mira watched them as they travelled, feeling a slight pang of something in her gut… probably just dinner, Sera and Bull cooked… whatever it was they found. They all sat around the fire Solas made, quiet and hopeful, while Mira took the first watch.

She was mulling over him again. Cullen was with Cassandra when they looked for her, and she said he was distraught… Why is she even thinking about this? It wasn’t like she thought he was…

 

 _“Red hair, brown eyes, a name that goes on forever. You wonder what he’d say, he knew about Tevinter, he was the smartest person you knew. You miss him but you feel guilty._ Why do you feel guilty Mira?” the voice asked coming from the sudden apparition beside her.

 

Mira jumped, barely holding in the scream that started in her throat. Then she saw the hat, the boy who’d warned hem about the Templars, _Cole._

 

“C-cole, you scared me! How long have you been here, did you follow us from Camp?” she snapped slightly harsher than necessary. She turned towards the two big tents, nothing stirred, it seems they were still asleep. _Good._

“Yes. You are hurting. I could hear it.”

“Alright then. You could hear me hurting? I mean I don’t see how but I guess my ribs still hurt.” She squinted at the boy, he was _odd_ to say the least.

 

“No. In your head. _Pinned to the floor, struggling to reach you, the Templar laughs as he holds you down, blood spilling out from his body. ‘I love you… I’ve loved you since I first saw you.’_ He wouldn’t want you to feel sad. He cared, he wanted you to be happy. _”_ Cole continued, but that voice he used… how did he know that voice?

Mira grabbed the boy by his collar, hauling him with her as she stood. The boy came with her placidly, all the while staring into her eyes.

 

“How do you… why are you doing this?” she demanded, hurt caught in her throat. There was a rustle behind them, someone moving in the tents.

“Because you think you don’t deserve to feel happy again, you think that you need to hurt because the templars were after you, not him.”

 

“It was my fault Cole.” She whispered, hands slipping from his coat to hang by her sides.

 

“No it wasn’t. Those Templars would have come anyway, he knew that. He wanted you to be happy, to feel _safe_. I don’t understand why you won’t talk to him? He would understand if you told him, he would make you happy.” Cole continued.

Mira stared at him, she didn’t have the slightest clue on how to respond. This boy knew things, things nobody could possibly know! Was he a mage? Was he reading her mind?

“What are you talking about!?” she squeaked, _Maker she knew exactly who he was talking about!_

“He isn’t like the other Templars, he cares about you, wants to make you happy. He thinks you’re lovely, beautiful, in every way he can think-“

 

“Herald, who are you talking to?” came Solas’s voice, startling Mira in the process. She jumped and turned towards the apostate, blushing brightly as she did. How the fuck did that kid know!

 

“Ah Compassion, it is rare to see you. Even rarer for you to take form?”

“Compassion?” she asked, taking a deep breath to calm herself.

“Cole is a spirit Herald. A spirit of Compassion who has taken form as a young man.”

“Yes. I’m glad you can see. I want to help.”

“I’m not sure I understand, but okay then. If you want to help then by all means. Is my watch over Solas?”

“Yes Herald. I believe the Commander is still awake should you wish to talk.” Solas finished with a quiet smirk. Obviously, he had been listening to their conversation… which made her wonder if anyone else had been listening?

 

She gave the elf a withering look before heading to the tent. True to his word Cullen was lying on his back, still awake. He smiled when she entered already pulling up the furs to let her in. Varric and Cassandra were both asleep, with Varric snoring gently and Cassandra curled around her pillow.

 

 

“Who were you talking to?” he asked quietly as she wound herself around him.

“Cole, he followed us from camp. Apparently, he’s a spirit of Compassion according to Solas.” She whispered back, making sure the furs were wrapped securely around her back, Cullen rolled over the other night and took half the furs with him… _the bastard._

“And he was talking about?” he prompted, more interested in talking than in sleeping apparently.

“Finn.” She sighed, “He said my hurt called him and that I need to stop blaming myself.”

“That’s not all he said.” Cullen pushed some more, brushing the hair from her face as he did. She looked at him curiously, one lovely eyebrow raised.

 

“You were listening?”

 

“Was hard not to. I heard your squeak and I was about to come to your aid, but I stopped when I hear you talking. Who’s was the boy talking about there at the end?”

“Just some handsome man, you might know him actually.” She laughed. Cullen couldn’t keep the smile from his face.

 

_She thinks I’m handsome._

 

“Oh? I know quite a few men who could qualify for handsome? Rylen for instance?” He joked hoping he could keep her smiling. He heard how her voice caught earlier, a bit of levity would be good for her.

“Rylen huh? I’m afraid you’re a bit late on that front, been there done that!” she giggled, properly giggled, eye’s crinkling and hands trying to cover her mouth. He got so caught up in her giggles that he almost missed the response.

_Wait Rylen! Really?!_

 

“You’ve been with Rylen? Maker, I’m not sorry I left him in charge at Camp now. That sneaky bastard.” He grumbled.

“Oh, you remember that night when you walked into my cabin and I was… well, _indisposed?_ Rylen.”

 

Cullen’s face was a picture. Shock and childish disgust all wrapped in a pretty parcel, that was making Mira absolutely loose her shit. Her cheeks were red, hands clasped tightly over her mouth as she shook with laughter, so much so that there were tears in her eyes.

 

“That’s right, laugh it up. I find out that you’ve slept with my Second in Command and you think it’s hilarious. Maker, I’m never going to get that image out of my head!” he moaned, slightly louder than a whisper.

“I should hope not. I’m pretty sure you saw more of me than of him.” She purred, running her fingers through his hair.

“You were a lovely sight.” He whispered lowly, in a way that made her shiver against him.

 

She looked up at him, through long lashes. Red hair melding with the fur that surrounded them. She looked at him, sultry and lustful and his heart started to race, he was certain she could feel it.

“Would you like to see that sight again Cullen?” she asked, just inches away from his lips.

Cullen leaned forwards before he could talk himself out of it. _She tastes like summer,_ just like he remembered. Maker he wanted this, wanted her, more than anything he could ever dream of.

“Yes.” He moaned just for her. Yes, he wanted to see her, he wanted all of her. _Loves_ -

 

She gasped into his mouth, hands curling into his hair as they kissed, far too caught up in him to care. His arms banded around her, holding her close, _Maker she’s perfect,_ with her breasts squishing up against his chest like that _._ His hand slipped up her thigh, pulling it over his hip, Mira took it further and slid on-top.

Tongues tangled against each other, both of them groping and grinding against each other like teenagers. It wasn’t until Mira let out a long moan as Cullen palmed her arse, did they realise that they were not alone.

 

“You know, if you two keep this up, it’s going in the next book.” Varric complained, cutting through the air of mindless desire that surrounded the pair.

Cullen blushed like a chantry sister, stammering for a response and Mira apologised quickly, waiting until Varric turned away to slide off of Cullen.

 

“How long have you wanted to kiss me like that?” she grinned, fingers still playing in his hair.

“Longer than I should admit.” He replied lowly, his voice still doing things to make her shiver, he’d have to remember this trick.

She smiled at him again before leaning in to press a gentle, more subdue kiss to his lips. One that still made him blush all the same.

“Maybe you could kiss me like that again sometime?” came her final tease as they finally settled down.

 

The two of them curled together, as it had become so routine for them, seeking comfort and companionship in each other and now a new element… a deeper, headier element that left both their hearts racing for more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're getting there people!  
> Buuut since we're getting closer to where I'm still bouncing around ideas, so i'm going to be slowing down to one posting a week... you gotta earn the burn. : )


	13. Skyhold

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Slightly NSFW.  
> Cullen get's flustered, Mira get's sauced and Cassandra is my babe with the best advice.

 

 

Chapter 13- Skyhold. 

 

 

Mira woke up first for once, Cullen was usually up and about way before her but today he was still curled around her back, arm draped around her waist as he breathed softly in her ear.  She stretched out against him, glancing around the tent to see if anyone else was here but both Cassandra and Varric were already up and gone.

_5 more minutes_ , she told herself. Settling back into Cullen’s warmth… only to settle against something firm… and long?

_Is that a pommel? Did he bring his sword to bed?_

She shuffled, reaching back with her hand to figure out what it was. Only to have him groan into her ear and tighten his hold around her waist.

_Okay, not his sword then._

 

She smirked at her circumstance, there was no polite way of getting out of Cullen’s tight grip but there was a multitude of less polite things to do with this position, and with no one around to complain…

Slowly she rocked her hips back against him, aiming to nestle his length against the cleft of her ass. She rocked slowly, reaching back with her hand to run up his length whenever he’d move to far away.

His breath rattled out against her ear, pitching into quiet whimpers as he began to thrust back against her.

_“Please.”_ He moaned softly as his hand wandered up to cup her breast.

 

She grinned, grinding her hips back once more before rolling over to face him. He was still just on the edge of sleep, his hands searching for her, hips thrusting those tented breaches towards her.

He whimpered when she touched him again, taking the feel of his cock in hand as she stroked him through his pants.

“ _Please. Oh Mir-ahh”_

 

_So, he was thinking of her then?_ Good to know.

She smiled, softer this time, more heated in the knowledge that it was her he was dreaming about. She let her free hand touch his body, feel the hard muscles of his chest, following the rise and fall up his neck towards his gasping mouth.

 

“ _Mira.”_  He groaned, still thrusting against her hand. His face twisted as the fades grip left him. His eyes flickering open a moment later.

“ _Mmira…M-_ ira! Ah! Oh fuck!” he groaned, curling over into her as his hips spasmed. Then he woke, eye’s snapping open, surprised, and scandalised, and just on the edge of sense... _a warm sticky sensation in his-_

She smiled warmly at his panicked face, just moments before he pulled away from her.

 

“Maker Mira!! I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean – did I -wait- how long have you been awake?!” He stammered, red faced and angling his crotch away from her.

“Long enough to hear you moaning my name.” she smirked, turning around to dig out a cloth from her bag and pass it to him.

There was a strangled noise from Cullen as he tried to form some kind of response. _If the ground opened up and swallowed him whole right now, he’d be **fine ** with that!_

 

“So, was it a good dream?” she asked airily, as she tried to hide her interest. _His moaning was really fucking hot._

“C-could you turn around, I need to get these pants off before they stain.” He mumbled, still blushing furiously. He was clearly agitated and embarrassed, although she wanted to tell him there was nothing to be embarrassed about, that it was actually kinda hot. But she knew he wouldn’t believe her right now.

“I’ll go see what’s for breakfast, I’ll bring you back something.”

 

He nodded quickly as she got up to leave. She smiled at him, what was meant to be soothing, disarming, was just making him flush even more.

_Cullen fucking Rutherford, you just rubbed one out on the Herald of Andraste! Without consent you dirty bastard! Oh maker._

_… judge me whole:_  
Find me well within Your grace.  
Touch me with fire that I be cleansed.  
Tell me I have sung to Your approval.

_For You are the fire at the heart of the world,  
And comfort is only Yours to give_.

 

He prayed silently as he stripped his trousers off, assessing if his cum had seeped through his smalls or had he been fast enough. Why he picked that verse he didn’t know… maybe because she was his fire, maybe because they gave each other comfort… maybe it’s because he wants to sing her approval…

He balled up the offending damp smalls and shoved them to the bottom of his pack, to ashamed to look at them. _On Mira! On the woman you-!!!_

 

“Hey Cassandra, what’re you doing?” Mira’s voice, muffled by tent flaps along with the shuffling of feet. Cullen hurried to redress.

“The Commander hasn’t appeared yet. I was concerned.” _She must think it’s the Lyrium. Shit._

“Oh, he’s fine. Just fixing his hair. You know how he gets.” Mira chirped happily, making Cassandra laugh in the process. _Well it’s a better excuse than what actually happened._

“Come on, have breakfast with me. I wanted to talk to you about the route we’re taking, we should only be-” their voices drifted off as Mira led Cassandra towards the fire and away from the tent.

Cullen breathed a sigh of relief before grabbing his comb, he’d better fix his hair otherwise the others will talk.

 

He straightened himself out, clothes in order, hair in order… as he turned to head out of the tent his stomach dropped as he knew he’d have to face her again. Maker he was embarrassed. He probably ruined everything by… by- _fuck._

Sighing, he continued to admonish himself as he began to pack away both his and Mira’s things. He’d clean up, dismantle the tent. Anything to delay seeing her… or hearing the scolding his was sure to receive.

 

There was a shuffling, the tent flaps pulled back as Mira poked her head in, grinning at him before entering.

“How are you doing?” she asked. Ducking her head down to try and catch his eyes.

“I ah. I’m alright, are you- alright?” he tried, he was still preparing himself. _Maker she must think I’m disgusting._

 

“More than alright. Cullen, I hope I’m not making you uncomfortable but this morning… it was _really_ hot.”

_No, that’s not right._

_Hot? Is she mad??_

He looked at her, properly, stared. She was smiling at him, calm and sure… she was telling the truth!

 

“Mira. I don’t know what to say. I was dreaming, I never meant to -uh- on you. I-um I’m sorry.” He stared out strong but the minute he thought about what he did, _what he dreamed about,_ he fumbled into the nervous dork of a man he was, rubbing the back of his head to avoid her look.

 

“Cullen, I didn’t mind. I may have even helped a bit once you started saying my name.” she smirked taking a step towards him.

“You helped?”

“Well, you weren’t rubbing against my ass the whole time.” _There it was, she’d done it now!_ The blush flared up his face like a fire spell, burning it to a bright red.

“I-I uh-” he began but stopped when she giggled at him.

 

Mira took a step towards him smoothly, before her confidence faltered and she paused suddenly unsure. Then she looked at him again, catching his eye with a smile as she quickly took the last two steps towards him, swiftly lent in, and placed a quick kiss on his cheek before turning with a giggle, and off she went again, back outside.

_Maker take him, she’s so fucking adorable._

 

_And he was so fucking. Done. For!_

 

**

 

Skyhold was beautiful, a fortress just as Solas spoke of, standing proud and hidden in the middle of the Frostbacks. A fortress that would rival the greatest both Orlais and Ferelden had to offer.

“Solas do you by-chance know how to levitate objects?” Mira asked as they approached the causeway.

“ _No_!” came both Cullen’s and Cassandra’s firm refusal.

 

“I do know some spells the would causing things to levitate. However, the spells work better on objects, not people, if that is what you’re thinking.” Solas answered smoothly.

“What if I stood on an object and then you made it levitate?” Mira theorised, much to Cullen’s frustration as both he and Cassandra’s reiterated their “ _No!”_

 

“Mira, your ribs are only just healed! Please don’t break anything else.” He pleaded, they were crossing the causeway into the main castle and even from the outside this place was magnificent, he could understand why she’d want to see it from above.

“Spoil sport.” She sighed.

 

 

Once inside the castle grounds they broke off into groups of two to search and assess the fortress, Sera and Bull explored the lower levels of the castle and grounds, Cole and Solas the upper. Both Varric and Mira decided to take the buildings leading up to the main hall while Cassandra and Cullen surveyed the battlements.

 

 

“Cullen, you and the Herald are becoming, close no?” Cassandra spoke as they walked up the stairs. However, Cassandra’s rather direct question, caused Cullen to stumble on a loose stone, making him fall into the wall inelegantly.

“I-uh, she’s a friend. A close friend Cass.” _Well he pulled that one right out of his arse._

“A close friend whom you just happen to share a bed with I see.” She teased, continuing on ahead.

 

He sighed, he didn’t appreciate her giggling… but he knew she would give him advice. Maker knows he needed it.

 

“I think I’m in love with her.” He said quietly, almost as if the wind would pick up his words and bring them straight down to Mira.

 

There was a squeak, followed by a sharp slapping sound. He turned to find his friend, hands clasped tightly over her mouth, shoulders tight with excited tension and quite frankly an expression on her face that _terrified_ him!

“Y-you! You! I KNEW IT!” she laughed, punching his shoulder in excitement. “When? How long?! Oh, Maker does she know? Was it from when you first met her? _Cul_ -len tell me!”

 

“I-I don’t know when exactly. She’s attractive and-“

“You are not wrong.” Cassandra interrupted giddily.

 

“ _Cassandra_!” he sighed rubbing his face. _This was not helping!_

“Sorry.”

“She is amazing, fiery and passionate, and strong! So, strong… And soft to, she does this thing when she’s sleeping where she snuggles against you like a mouse. No matter how far away she started during the night, by morning she’s tucked up against my chest and it’s… it's wonderful.” He sighed wistfully, recalling the smell of her hair under his nose.  _Arbour blessing and vanilla..._

 

“Cullen, I’m happy for you. You should tell her how you feel.”  Cass smiled softly, punching his arm lighter this time.

“Ah, that’s the problem. I don’t know how to tell her! Every time I’ve gone to broach the subject she… pulls away, she’ll make some joke or calls it a distraction…” he sighed rubbing his head anxiously.

“You saw how we share the same bed? It’s been like that since before we closed the breach. It’s not what you think! It’s just sleeping, it’s comfort, she has nightmares same as me and it helps. But when I made a joke about the Watch seeing us together, what they might assume about us… she didn’t sleep for three days! She drank stamina potions the entire time, I had to bring her back to bed and _not_ talk about it.”

 

“Ah. I see, she is nervous? Is it because you were a Templar? I know she, has trouble with them after what she’s been through.”                                                                                                                                                                                 

 

“I-I don’t know. Or maybe it’s because she was married, Cole was talking about that… or maybe it’s because of the role she’s been put in, you see it to, right? The people are looking to her to fix things. Maybe she’s feeling pressured?” he theorised as they ambled along.

 

The building they’d entered could serve as a good point for an office he thought absently.

 

“I do see the way they look at her, how we all look at her… I cannot speak for how she feels, but it is obvious that she likes you, that she feels safe around you. Maybe you need to work towards it, gently. Court her Cullen, bring her gifts, take her to dinner, woo her! If you need ideas I have a few books you could read!” she gushed suddenly fanning her face.

“Cass, if this is you trying to get me to read ‘Swords and Shields’ the answer is still no, the Dwarf already put me off… but do you think that’ll work? Take it slow, woo her?”

 

“Yes, I think that maybe she panics when she’s presented with something like this. She tries to change it into something familiar, something comfortable, I don’t think that she even realises that she’s doing it. But it is obvious she wants to try, otherwise I doubt you would get as close to her as you have.”

“Take it slow Cullen, play to her pace until she’s ready but you must promise me one thing.” Cassandra warned, she’s turned to him just as they reached the last tower.

 

“What is it?”

 

“Do not let her take advantage of you. I realise that you are a fully-grown man with a good head and good sense, but…. I worry for you Cullen and it would probably be a good idea to let her know about the Lyrium.”

 

He nodded at that, “I’ll tell her soon. Thank you, Cassandra, I needed someone to talk to.” He finished with a sigh, they’d surveyed the entirety of the ramparts, it was all remarkably well kept, solidly build and perfect for what they needed.

“We are friends Cullen, it’s what I’m here for. We should get back to the others, and Mira.” She giggled, pointing the way down some stairs.

He groaned at her needling, but he was glad for it, glad to have a friend.

 

**

Things moved quickly after that, the able bodied went to work immediately after reaching Skyhold. Clearing debris, stabilising the bridge, making sure nothing would collapse. Mira was being pulled in sixteen different directions, everyone wanted her opinion, her input, her help.

She’d been helping in the infirmary when Cassandra came and found her, she’d been helping brew more potions and stitch wounds while Cole soothed them. Her hands were stained with blood and elfroot, she tried to clean them off as Cassandra waited.

 

“They arrive daily from every settlement in the region. Skyhold is becoming a pilgrimage. If word has reached these people, it will have reached the Elder one. We have the walls and numbers to put up a fight here but this threat is far beyond the war we anticipated.

But we now know what allowed you to stand against Corypheus, what drew him to you.”

They’d walked up the main stairway to the upper levels, Mira listening to Cassandra talk. It was almost odd, she was being more serious than normal, if that was even possible.

“He came for this thing, but now it’s useless to him and he wants me dead. That about cover it?” she chuckled, trying to make her friend laugh.

“The anchor has power but it’s not why you’re still standing here.” Cass continued, gesturing for them to keep walking.

_So much for lightening the mood._

“Your decisions let us heal the sky, your determination brought us out of haven. You are the creatures rival because of what you did! And we know it, all of us.” She emphasised leading her up more stairs towards Leliana… who was holding a sword?

 

What in the void was going on?

 

“The Inquisition requires a leader. The one who has already been leading us.” She told her. Leliana had bowed her head in respect.

_RESPECT FOR HER??_

 

A crowed gathered below, everyone, everyone was looking to her, to Mira. A washed-out runaway with a history of bad decisions! Maker Josie was even in that crowd and… Cullen.

“You, Mira.” Cassandra finished her speech.

She was too busy watching how Cullen was reacting. Obvious pride and nervousness on his face. He trusted her with this, they trusted her with this??

“I-It’s unanimous? You all have that much confidence in me??” she stuttered, this was a surprise to say the least!

 

“All of these people have their lives because of you Mira, they will follow.” Cassandra smiled, trying to encourage her.

“That wasn’t the question.”

 

“I will not lie, you’re too clever for that, handing this power to anyone is troubling. But I believe you are- that this is how it’s meant to be. There would be no Inquisition without you. How you lead? That must be yours to decide.”

 

She nodded in acceptance. Slowly and with great respect Mira reached out to grasp the sword, it was big, ornamental but incredibly sharp.

 

“Corypheus will never let me live in peace. He made that clear, he intends to be a god, to rule over us all. Corypheus must be stopped. For all our sakes.” She swore, holding the sword.

“Where ever you lead us.” Cassandra nodded in agreement, approving of the Inquisitions new goal.

 

“Have our people been told?” she called out to the crowd.

“They have, and soon the world!” Josephine replied.

“Commander, will they follow?”

 

“Inquisition. Will you follow?” he shouted into the crowd, only to be met with a resounding cry of acceptance.

“Will you fight?” the crowd cheered again.

“Will we triumph?” a third cheer erupted.

 

Mira watched as he turned back towards her, pride shining on his beautiful face, he drew his sword to point it towards her, exalting her with one last proclamation.

“Your Leader, your Herald, YOUR INQUISITOR!”

The crowd roared like nothing she’d ever seen, the sound echoing out and around the battlements. She smiled directly at Cullen before thrusting her sword in the air, making the crowd cheer even louder, she could have sworn she heard even the army down in the valley cry out as well!

 

 

Things moved quick after that, everyone wanted to congratulate her now and her advisors wanted to figure out what their next step was.

Mira was swept up to the War room and tried to keep a level head as they planned their next moves. Questions were asked, theories about Corypheus and his motives were bounced around until eventually Varric interrupted them.

Apparently, the crowds outside had organised into an impromptu celebration and were demanding their Inquisitor attend.

 

Mira was escorted out to the Tavern by the dwarf, her advisors promising to follow along later. They’d stopped by quickly to her quarters to let her get changed into to something more suitable, and by the time they made their way back to the main hall, they managed to bump into Cullen making his own way back to his office.

 

He stopped and stared at her, catching Mira’s attention.

“Inquisitor, Mira, you’re looking- Dwarf, I didn’t see you there.” He began with a friendly smile, before catching sight of the dwarf who he suspected of using them as fodder for his stories.

“Cullen,” she replied matching his smile as she turned to Varric, “Could you give us a minute?”

“You two take all the time you need. I’ll be waiting by the door.”

 

They waited until Varric moved away, slipping back into the friendly atmosphere that usually surrounded the pair.

“You’re looking lovely this evening.” He smiled, whispering so only she could hear.

“Thank you. Are you coming to the Tavern? We could finish our dance if you’d like?” she giggled throwing him a suggestive look. He flushed before responding, leaning in close so he could whisper in her ear.

“I'll be down as soon as i've finished my reports. Because there is nothing I’d like more, than to dance with the most beautiful woman in Thedas.” He purred, resting his hand against the small of her back as he did.

 

She felt the warmth of his hand tingle all the way up her spine, all the way up until it stopped at the blush on her cheeks.

“Flatter.” She laughed, letting him pull away as they both grinned.

“Well, I’m trying to be. I don’t know if it’s actually working.”

She laughed at that as well, _Maker he’s on a roll today._

“Oh, it’s working.” she smiled, reaching to brush her thumb over the back of his hand. “I’ll see you at the Tavern later, _Cullen.”_ She purred his name just for him, incentive for him to come socialise.

 

 

Varric smirked as they got to chatting together on their way to the Tavern. It turns out he’d organised this little celebration to mark her rise in status… _Inquisitor, whatever next. Empress of Orlais?_

 

“Curly’s in a good mood, it seems like he’s been smiling for days now Inquisitor. Anything you want to tell us? Illicit love affairs abound in these times.” Varric teased after they entered the Tavern to a cheering crowd. They’d all parted respectfully to let their new Inquisitor get to her friends.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” She lied, keeping a straight face as they approached their friends. Bull had set up a large table, enough room for everyone to sit and drink until they were blind.

 

“Aw Quizzy, are you blushing?” Sera cackled as she set down a drink in front of her.

“No.”

“Ha! Aw Mira you are blushing? For the Commander huh? Who knew!” Dorian joined in, poking Bull in the ribs as he did.

“I Do Not Blush!!” she barked, before shoving her drink down her throat.

 

“Look at ‘er, she’s blushin like a beet!” Sera continued to laugh.

“Argh, Andraste save your Herald! Save me from these assholes and protect me in your magnificent bosoms!” Mira groaned, slumping over the table and into her arms. Her drink drained and forgotten.

“Mira! Do not speak of Andraste like that!” Cassandra gasped, but honestly, she was rather invested in this conversation. The Commander is a dear friend of hers and she knew, all too well about his feelings for their Inquisitor.

Mira laughed from her slouched position, she was relaxed here, with her friends.

 

“Ah come on Celebrate! Not every day you get made Inquisitor!” he laughed, slapping her on the back as he poured her another drink.

“Oh, only around every few thousand years apparently.” Dorian added, he looked looser, more relaxed, she wondered where how much he’d had to drink already.

 

They laughed and drank together and somewhere along the line Mira got the whole bar to sing a drunken rendition of ‘ _Andraste’s Mabari’_ to the point where some more patriotic Fereldens had happy tears in their eyes by the end of it.

It was a warm, welcoming environment. Everyone was enjoying the mostly drunken joy of being safe, secure, and now with a goal, a leader who will protect them.

 

Mira was at the bar, grabbing another barrel of wine for their table when it happened.

Leliana arrived silently, holding an opened letter. The seal was broken but the silver horses imprinted in the wax were still clear as day. Mira’s stomached dropped, _What do they want now!_

“Message for you Inquisitor. I’m sorry, but you need to read this.” She told her seriously. Leliana waited a moment before Mira nodded, taking the letter, and opening it at the bar.

 

_To my Sister, Lady Mira Trevelyan._

_It is with great pain that I write to you now. Things have come to light about our family that will shame me until my last. That I, your eldest brother was so easily manipulated by our father, that I believed everything he told us about you._

_It has come to light that Father has done things to this family, that he is the reason you ran away, that you had to be sedated when you were home. I am so sorry. I should have known, I should have done something to protect you Mira._

_Mira, I must inform you that our brother Jacob has killed Father after it came to light what he did to you… and poor Fels. It wasn’t Darkspwan that killed our sister, it was him, and I would shudder to think what would have happened to you if you hadn’t been chosen by Andraste. I regret to inform you that Mother died shortly after father, she wrote a letter apologising to you, trying to explain why before she met with the maker on her own terms._

_There is nothing this family could ever do to make this right sister, the horrors that have been committed to you and others because of our father are beyond recompense._

_As such I hope you take this offering, I hereby swear that House Trevelyan of Ostwick and all its remaining assets, pledge it full and unwavering support to the Inquisition. I give you everything we have, our fortunes, our lands, even my life. Although I ask that you find it in your heart to spare my wife and child, they are innocent in this sorry affair and I would keep them safe if I could._

_As I write this letter to you, Jacob has gathered a group of soldiers to track down the Templars who hurt you. I hope to bring you news of Justice soon sister._

_I leave our fates in your hands._

_Yours,_

_Lord Timothy Adans Trevelyan._

She stared at the letter, reading it over three whole times to make sure she understood.

Her Father was dead.

Her brothers knew, they killed him because they knew he was a monster.

… Mother was dead and Fels death wasn’t Darkspawn…

 

_ Fuck me... _

 

The letter crumpled in her hand. She didn’t know how to react. Happy? Ecstatic that the _monster_ who caused her hurt was dead?... upset? It was her fault again that this had happened… Maker it’s always her fault.

“Inquisitor? Are you alright? What would you like us to do?” Leliana asked softly, her training as a bard had given her the gist to read people. But the range of emotions flashing across Mira’s face were too much to track.

Mira paused, taking a breath before replying, “Confer with Josephine, figure out how our new assets can be of use to the Inquisition… leave my brothers a small stipend if possible, enough to for them to be comfortable.”

“Of course, Inquisitor. Please try to enjoy your night, I am sorry for the news.” Leliana took her leave, allowing the Inquisitor a few moments to gather herself before she turned back to her friends, with two new barrels of wine.

**

 

The night progressed into more drinking, and more drinking until Mira was standing on the table trying to climb onto the Bulls horns while drunkenly signing yet another rendition of Andraste’s Mabari.

“Alright Firecracker, come on down.” Bull laughed, catching her easily as she leapt at him from the table.

Varric looked around, she and Curly were close, he might be able to help her? Quietly he sent one of the less drunk soldiers off to find the Commander and bring him here… had to bribe him 50 silvers as well! Red, needs to keep an eye on that one.

 

Cullen came walking through the Tavern doors soon after, a worried expression fixed to his face as he scanned the bar for their Inquisitor. The Solider said she was drunk, that Varric had sent him to help her. When he caught sight of her she was pressed up against the Iron Bulls chest as he helped her drink what looked like water.

 

_What in the bloody void._

Anger and irritation flashed through him. She’d just been made Inquisitor, the leader of them all and _This_ is what she does? Get drunk? Jump on the half-dressed Quinari like it’s nothing and expect her reputation to – _No stop it. That’s not what’s going on and you know it._

Bull caught sight of him before Mira did as he acknowledged him and waved him to come from behind where she couldn’t see. He approached her slowly, trying not to startle her as he came into her line of sight.

“Oh! Cullen, you’re here! Hi! Hello!” she chattered quickly, words tumbling out of her mouth. There was a smile on her face, twisted and manic. _Maker what happened?_

“Did you come to dance with me?” she swayed, her smile shifting as she looked him up and down lustily.

 

“Inquisitor-“ he was cut off by her sharp look, _ah titles._ “Mira,” he began again, “I think it’s time you went to bed.” He told her, reaching out to hold her hand. He ran his thumb over the underside of her wrist in a way he knew calmed her.

Her expression faltered, sad eyes flicking down to their point of connection before she caught it and smiled again.

“Will you be in bed to?” she smirked, planting her foot on the floor as she fell towards Cullen. He caught her in surprise, propping her up against his chest, sliding his arm around her shoulders to steady her.

“Come on Mira.” He sighed guiding her out of the Tavern slowly. Guiding her was like trying to guide a herd of cats. Drunken cats to be precise.

“Oh, I’ll come alright, come on you if I could. With all your muscles and pretty lips.” She slurred leaning up towards him.

 

He faltered, she was falling into him again and he was trying so hard to remain respectful, keep his hands in safe spaces on her back and shoulders and not slide them down to her arse. He guided her into the keep and through the empty hall towards the entrance to her quarters.

They’d barely gotten through the first door before Mira started to squirm again.

 

“You know Cullen, you could _distract_ me, if you wanted?” she purred lustily in his ear. She was squirming all over him, drunker than a pirate at port.

 

“Is that what you want? Just a distraction?” he answered, it was late, he was tired… and if he was being honest he was a little angry with her. This was not behaviour fitting of the new Inquisitor, even if he knew something was wrong.

“Mm-hmm, you are a lovely distraction. And if you wanted you could come to bed with me… and not sleep if you know what I mean?” her smirk told him she’s thought she already won. That he would come with her at the hint of an offer… like a dog on a leash.

 

“No. Go to bed Inquisitor.” He rejected firmly, almost cross at her offer.

 

She faulted, the easy roll that had captained her movements stalled. Leaving her still and confused… and flustered.

“You don’t want to come to-” she let the question fall into quiet as she stared at him. Stilling her features to hide her emotions.

 

“Mira, I am not some _distraction_ to be used at your beck and call like some damn leashed pup!” he snapped at her, catching the exact moment she flinched from him in fear.

 

“I-I’m sorry. I thought-… I’ll stop making advances.” she started panicked before steeling herself back to calm. It was almost like she’d shrugged off all effect of the alcohol in her system. As poised and collected as the nobility she ran away from.

She turned away from him quickly, steadying herself against the wall as she made her way up to her quarters.

_Shit. No that’s not what he meant!_

 

“Mira, wait.” He called after her, following her when she stopped for him. She was looking at him warily, the small sway way returned as she stood, waiting for him to continue.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have snapped at you, that was rude of me.” He began, slowly reaching for her hands to hold.

 

“I’m not some toy to be used and thrown away whenever you feel like it. I’m not just some distraction… I care about you Mira, a lot, and if you’d have asked me to come to bed with you, I would have said yes in a heartbeat! But you’re drunk, you’re tired and you’re upset about something you’re not telling me. I will not take advantage of that… if we were to become _intimate_ with each other-” he paused, his throat closing on the thought.

 

_Don’t fuck this up Rutherford! Remember what Cass said._

“If we were, I want it to be because I make you happy.” He sighed, lowering his forehead against hers with his eyes closed, “I want to bring you flowers and gifts and take you to dinner.” He heard her breath catch and so he opened his eyes to gaze into hers.

“If we were intimate together Mira, I would want to kiss you, whisper the things I adore about you in your ear, hear your beautiful voice sing as you call out my name. I would bring you pleasure Mira. I want to please you.” He spoke deeply, using the tone he knows makers her shiver before pausing to look at her. Her eyes had become so dark, while this beautiful blush had risen on her cheeks.

“But I will not be used again.” He growled, so close to her lips, he could taste each panting breath she took.

 

He took a step back, creating the space she needed to breathe. She looked, dishevelled, chest rising and falling as fast as she could suck the air in, face almost as red as her hair.

He nodded quickly, almost as if he was assessing his work done before making the last few step up to the door of her tower and opening it for her.

 

She followed, words still not forming right in her mouth, she kept opening it and closing it. Lost in his words… and so impossibly aroused!

 

 

“Good night Mira. I hope you sleep well.” He smirked as she passed.

“I-I, yes. Thank you, Cullen, for uh- for…” she fumbled, eyes kept glancing to him. It was almost like she was shy… If Mira could be shy that is.

He reached out for her, tilting her head up by the chin to look at him. He gave her small warm smile, like the ones she was so used to giving him.

“Get some rest Mira. You can come and find me tomorrow.”

 

She smiled back at that, her senses returned as she realised what he meant. The door closed behind her and Cullen eventually headed back down towards the main hall.

 

 

 

“You know, Aveline was right, you can be eloquent! Almost couldn’t have said it better myself!” came Varric’s voice, pulling him well and truly out of his head.

“Var- What in the void are you doing here at this time of night!” he barked, hissing to keep quiet. He didn’t need the night guards coming by and asking what was going on!

 

“Eh, I wanted to make sure you two got to bed alright. I got here just in time to hear you steam the pants off our dear Inquisitor!” Varric snickered, he was at his table, something Cullen needed to pass if he was going to get back to his quarters tonight.

“The Inquisitor and I maintain a strictly professional-“

“Yeah, yeah Curly, keep your relationship quiet if you want. It’ll get out eventually, especially with the way you two look at each other. I just wanted to see if you knew what that letter was about?”

Cullen had to rein in the questions he wanted to bark at the dwarf. What  _Letter,_ _How do you know about us, who else knows, how does she look at me??_

“I only came down to take her to bed once one of the scouts told me she was aiming to 'Ride the Bull'. And what letter?” he settled on diplomatically.

Varric sighed pulling out a crumpled parchment from his coat.

“Here she dropped it in the Tavern, it’s a letter from her family… I watched her open it, and then I watched her drink herself into a stupor in under half an hour. Our Inquisitor is an interesting character. She’s not one to talk about her feelings, period, but she wears her heart on her sleeve for all to see. Be good to her Curly. That girls had too much heartache, she deserves someone who’ll make her happy.”

 

He took the parchment from his hand, he’d read it later, once he returned to his quarters. He watched the dwarf with a wary eye, he seemed genuine about this… and he’d probably already given the dwarf enough for him to write a series of books!

 

“That’s what I aim to do Varric. She’s a dear friend and i-“

“Want to be more than just friends, right?”

Cullen glowered down at him for that but Varric just chuckled.

“Well, let me know if you need any help _wooing_ our lady Inquisitor. She’s a tough nut to crack after all.” He laughed taking his que to head to his room.

 

Cullen had barely gotten through the door when Varric called out again,

“Oh and by the way, You know that whole scene is going in the next book Curly!”

_Damn that Dwarf!_

**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ooh boy we're getting close now, almost at the cold hard smut!   
> Also, Cassandra is the best supportive babe ever.


	14. (Part 1) It started with Dinner...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cullen attempts to woo our lady Inquisitor.

 

 _Chapter 14 – part one – it started with dinner..._

Cullen’s night had been, _interesting,_ to say the least. After escorting his drunk Inquisitor back to her quarters, he was given the explanation to her outburst in the form of a letter… a personal letter which he should not have read without her consent. But he did… and he understood. This was obviously difficult for her and he resolved to be there if she needed.

He trained his troops, wrote reports, and spent his morning being the Commander the Inquisition required… that was until Dorian came and foolishly challenged his chess superiority. But he happily accepted and was keeping rather amused at Dorians banter. The man was certainly more ostentatious than he was accustomed to but he was of a good sort and clearly as clever as he thought, as this challenging match soon proved.

 

“Gloat all you like; I have this one.” Cullen smirked setting the trap as he moved his piece.

“Are you sassing me Commander? I didn’t know you had it in you.” Dorian returned with his teasing and Cullen was about to show him just how much he could sass him when a flash of red caught his eye.

“Why do I even – Inquisitor! I mean Mira.” Cullen moved to stand, trying to greet her respect she deserved, hoping against hope that she didn’t hate him for what he did last night.

 

“Leaving, are you? Does this mean I win?” Dorian smirked, that bastard could probably see his school boy crush a mile off, he had certainly teased him about it before and he was now trying to use it to his advantage. Mira laughed at Dorian, waving him off with a smile.

He slowly sat back down, he was just about to win and Mira didn’t seem like she was in a hurry. Although she did look lovely today, she wasn’t wearing her normal Skyhold clothes but had opted for a soft brown pants and a long blue tunic, which cut deep down her cleavage. To keep warm she’d wrapped one of the furs they’d brought to Skyhold around her shoulders, now altered into a cloak.

 

“Josephine, have you tending to the nobles again?” Dorian asked as he gestured to her clothes. Mira seemed surprised but smiled all the same.

“No _Madame de Fer_ summoned me for tea, she told me to dress nice and this is all I had. Wasn’t impressed. I’ve spent the last two hours being poked and prodded by her tailor, I don’t know whether that woman likes me or despises me and my clothes.” Mira sighed running her hand through her loose hair as she pulled it over her shoulder to fiddle with it.

 

“Nonsense, you’re beautiful.” Cullen replied, blushing slightly when he realised he said that out loud and quickly pretended to ponder his next move, not noticing the responding blush on her own cheeks.

 

“Cullen, you need to come to terms with my inevitable victory. You’ll feel much better.” Dorian teased breaking the silence with his move… right into his trap.

“Really? Cause I just won and I feel fine.” Cullen chuckled, feeling rightly smug at beating Dorian and seeing the look on his face. Confused then slightly amused.

“Don’t get smug, there’ll be no living with you.” He came back with, his eye’s flicking towards the Inquisitor with his words, an obvious invitation for Cullen to do something as he stood to leave.  He smirked rather suggestively as he walked behind Mira, out of her eye line.

 

“I should get back to my duties.” Cullen began but as soon as the words left his mouth he caught the exasperated look on Dorians face as he gestured angrily to Mira and then to the board behind her back.

 

“But if you would care for a game?” he continued and both he and Dorian waited for what the Inquisitor would say next. She cocked her hip out slightly with a smirk of her own before replying with.

“Prepare the board, _Commander_.” She practically purred his name almost breaking him off from his line of thought. Thankfully Dorian had left the moment Mira accepted.

 

“As a child, I would play this game with my sister. She would get a stuck-up grin whenever she won, which was all the time.” He laughed at the memory. “My brother and I practiced for weeks, and the look on her face the day I finally won. But between serving the Templars and the Inquisition I haven’t seen them in years. I wonder if she still plays.” He spoke as they made their moves trying to keep himself distracted from how low her dress was cut and how lovely she looked that cloak.

“You mentioned siblings before, how many do you have?” Mira asked, her bottom lip was pulled softly under her teeth as she concentrated on her next move.

“Two sisters and a Brother. You?” Cullen replied, eye’s zeroing in on her lips.

“Two brothers and … I had a sister. Where is your family now?” she continued, focusing the subject on him as she moved her knight into a rather strategic position. _How did I miss that?_ He thought as he watched her sit back up and rearrange her shirt. _He knew exactly how he missed that._

 

“They moved to South Reach after the Blight. I do not write to them as often as I should, ah my turn.” He pondered, trying to look for a strategy out of the trap she was planning.

“You’d better prepare to relieve those defeats Commander.” Mira joked as she gestured for him to move, doing it in such a way that revealed more of that delectable cleavage. _If she keeps that up, I really will lose!_

 

“Oh really? And what about you Mira, have any hobbies I don’t know about?” Cullen asked, maybe if he kept her talking he could regain the ground he lost staring at her.

 

“Well, you already know about the potions and salves I make. I guess I’m also interested in making liquors too, actually I’ve got a nice cider that’s just finished… maybe we could try it together?” Mira smiled looking up at Cullen rather than the game, Cullen caught on to what she was implying in her smile.

“I would like that.” Cullen admitted, throwing his own smile back to her.

 

“How about you come to my office this evening and we’ll have dinner?” He offered, heart in his throat.

_This is what he told her last night, woo her Cullen. Woo her!_

 

“I would love to, say 7? We can sit round your desk! It’ll be fun.” She laughed, throwing in her joke to distract from her blush.

“I’m sure I can find some chairs Mira.” He laughed back, letting her have her distraction.

 

 

They played the game for a while longer, both of them dancing against the other’s moves in an attempt to avoid their traps, losing pieces in the process. It was a close game but Cullen was sure he could see a wining move.

“This is the longest we’ve gone without discussing the Inquisition or related matters since we got to Skyhold, to be honest I appreciate the distraction.”  He spoke evaluating his options before he glanced up at her.

“Me to, I think it would be nice to spend more time together.” Mira blushed slightly, tucking a strand of her red hair behind her ear as she bit her lip again.

“I think I would like that.” He smiled, hopefully catching the meaning behind her words.

“Me to.” She sighed happily obviously please at his response.

 

“You said that.” He purred, a warm feeling settling in the pit of his stomach as he realised he caught her meaning correctly. She blushed and put her focus back on the game.

“We should finish our game, my turn, right?” he smiled enjoying that warm feeling as he suddenly did something he didn’t expect to do when he started this game as he moved his King into a position for her to win. Mira saw the move and the hidden smile on his face and scanned the board for another second, without seeing any possible way that this move could go wrong. She moved to win.

 

“I believe this game is yours. We will have to try again some time.” Cullen smiled, secretly just a little proud of himself for delivering that line without fumbling or blushing.

“That we will _Cullen_. I look forward to seeing you play from a different position.” Mira purred making him flush before she smiled, “See you for dinner?” she asked moving to stand, as she did she leaned forward slightly and the colour on his face brightened as he desperately tried to tear his eyes away.

 _She was doing it on purpose, she’s enjoying making me blush_.

 

“I uh, yes. Dinner. I’ll see you for dinner.” He fumbled, rubbing the back of his head as he realised just how under furnished his quarters were.

“You bring the dinner, I’ll bring the booze.” She smiled as she moved to leave, her hand brushing against his shoulder gently and he was washed with a wave of happy calm as she made her way back across the gardens.

 

Cullen smiled to himself, Dinner with her, with _Mira_. Maker’s breath he was a lucky man.

 

**

                                                                                                                                                                                

Cullen spent most of his free time for the remainder of the day clearing out his quarters and then searching for something for the two of them to sit on, when Rylen suggested that he saw a rather nice couch in a tower not far from Cullen’s office. So, he and some of the soldiers decided to help the Commander retrieve it, all the while teasing him about who he was cleaning if office for, theorizing in the end that the dear Ambassador had finally had enough of his rustic Ferelden ways.

They had also managed to find a nice table to go with the couch, both needed a minor brush off but they were sturdy, didn’t look too bad, and didn’t smell funny either. Unlike some of the other furniture leftover in Skyhold.

As the men started to leave, Rylen paused in the doorway sending his men on ahead as he wanted to have a quick word to the Commander about supplies.

 

“You know supplies aren’t my area Rylen; shouldn’t you be talking to the Quartermaster?” Cullen asked as he started throwing wood into the fire for later, he had noticed Mira got cold easily and he wanted her to feel comfortable.

“Ah yes, but that was just to get rid of the riff raff.” Rylen smirked, folding his arms as he lent on the doorway.

“So why did you want to talk to me?” Cullen continued as he started to get suspicious as to his friends’ behaviour.

“So, You and the Lady Inquisitor huh?” Rylen shot, his smirk turning into a full fledge grin when he saw the Commander stumble in surprise, his small mistake only confirming the rumour.

 

“What! What in the world gave you that impression?!” Cullen’s face shot into a brilliant red of embarrassment.

“Ah come on Cullen, you’ve been crushing on her for months! And now you’re clearing out your office? Bringing in a couch and extra chairs? Making this all presentable? You’ve got a date and if not with our lovely Inquisitor, then who else?” Rylen teased.

“Hmm, speaking of our lovely Inquisitor, you and she were seeing each other once if I’m not mistaken?” he broached cautiously, he wanted to know if there were any hard feelings that might interact with their work life.

 

Rylen looked surprised at that question but quickly twigged as to what his friend was getting at, “It was a casual thing Cullen, nothing more than a few late nights relief with each other. It ended after she came back from the twisted future at Redcliff, apparently, I turned into a Lyrium behemoth and she killed me… I have no claim on her, nor do I wish one. She is my Inquisitor and friend that is all. You’re my friends, I want to see you both happy.”

Cullen sighed with relief, losing one of his rare friends was something he didn’t want to do.

 

“So, got any advice? Think I’ve got a chance here?” he asked, he was getting excited at the prospect. Mira, unattached, coming to him for _dinner._

 

 “Cullen as your friend I’m going to give you a piece of advice that has saved my ass more times that I could count, when in doubt _Bring Flowers_.” Rylen chuckled, watching his friend fluster and nod at his suggestion. “Talk to the lovely Ambassador, I’m sure she’ll be able to get you sorted out with some flowers.”

 

“You’re right, I should go – I need to get her some- “Cullen started as he grabbed his coat from his desk and started rushing towards Josephine’s office.

“You’re welcome!” Rylen called out after the now fleeing Commander.

“Thank you!” Cullen called back as he was halfway down the ramp towards the keep.

 

 

Cullen pushed through the throngs of visiting dignitaries and soldiers as he rushed into the Ambassadors office which thankfully only had one occupant. The Lady Ambassador who was currently concentrating on writing what looked like a letter at her desk.

 

“Josephine, I need a favour.” Cullen started as he approached her desk, he was trying to keep a neutral face as so not to give away his intention to quickly and cause unwanted attention.

“From you Commander, this must be serious.” Josie frowned and put down her quill to give the slightly imposing man her full attention, which to her surprise he flushed and started to awkwardly shuffle under her attention.

 

“It’s a favour of a more personal nature Josie, unrelated to Inquisition matters.” Cullen sighed, maker’s breath he was going to rub a hole straight through his skull if he kept rubbing the back of his neck.

“Oh, of course. What can I help with?” Josie asked, looking slightly surprised that the Commander would come to her on a personal matter but she was glad all the same.

“Flowers? I need to find some flowers for a-uh friend.” Cullen stumbled over his words slightly at the end, a mistake Josephine did not miss.

“As I’m sure you’re aware Commander, flowers have a language of their own. What’s the occasion, are these flowers for a sick friend or a happy occasion?” Josie prodded using her skills as a diplomate to get the more important details from him.

 

“Dinner.” Cullen replied gruffly seeing no need to elaborate further.

 

“Ah with someone special I assume? No need to fret dear Commander, as it happens the Merchant who sells me my flowers arrived in Skyhold this morning, she has a lovely selection. I was just about to head down there if you’d like to accompany me.” Josephine offered as she moved to stand gesturing to the door way. Cullen nodded and allowed Josie to lead the way.

 

They made small talk as they made their way down to where the merchants had gathered and Cullen quickly caught on as to the fact that Josie was trying to get more information out of him, mainly who he was meeting for dinner.

 

“Lady Montilyet, such a pleasure to see you again and to your friend I do not believe we’ve had the pleasure.” Greeted the Merchant as she curtsied to the pair.

“Lucy, this is Commander Cullen he wanted to inspect the goods being delivered today and I was looking for some ways to brighten up our hold, so I insisted he accompany me.” Josephine smiled as she busied herself with looking at the flowers on display. Cullen silently thanked her for her little subterfuge.

“Ah of course milady, did you have anything in mind?” Lucy asked as she moved to assist the Ambassador, Cullen himself was looking at some of the different flowers.

 

“What about these?” he asked as he gestured to a long red flower, it reminded him of the cloak she wore earlier.

“Is someone dying?” Lucy asked with an innocent expression.

“Uh no, not today.” Cullen sighed defeated as he moved onto looking at a different plant.

 

“Ah you have Arbor Blessing, I’ll take a bouquet of Andraste’s Grace wrapped in Arbor Blessing and I’ll send a messenger down with the rest of my order.” Josephine smiled as she moved to let the merchant prepare her order.

“Did you want anything Commander, something to brighten your office perhaps?” Lucy asked as she wrapped the bouquet.

 

“Ah just these thank you.” Cullen smiled as he collected a handful of cinnamon quills and vanilla pods, catching the slightly surprised expression on Josie’s face.

“For my clothes, it tends to get a bit damp in my loft.” Cullen explained as he handed over the coin to the woman.

 

The sun was starting to hang low in the sky by the time Cullen had thanked Josephine for her assistance and returned to his quarters, stopping by the kitchens first to explain his situation to the sweet cook who’d taken a liking to him. He had one of her delicious roasts coming for them, paired with a desert of fresh apple pie and sweetened cream. She said she would have the maid deliver the meal at 7’ sharp.

Cullen managed to make it back to his room to have a quick wash with the bowl of water before, changing into something more appropriate for dinner. He was tempted to wear his armour but he thought better of it and opted for one of his cotton shirts and trousers instead, but there was a slight chill without the fire, so he allowed himself to wear his coat. _The one that_ Mira _liked to stroke._

He checked his appearance in the looking glass, noting the tired bags under his eyes. When was the last time he got a decent night’s sleep? He sighed to himself as he ran his hair through with a comb.

 

There was some time before she arrived so Cullen resolved to read any missives he might have missed and order the guards away for the evening, with strict standing orders for no messengers or interruptions for the rest of the evening.

The sun was setting as Cullen sat at his desk, work finished and cleared away, he quietly arranged the flowers Josephine had provided him with, making sure they were perfect. That woman was far cleverer than she let on at times, and she seemed clever all the time! Cullen had no doubt in his mind that Josie knew exactly who he was meeting from the moment he stepped foot in her office this afternoon.

The Arbor Blessing was a nice touch, the same scent as her perfume and the other flowers were pretty to, Ferelden wild flowers mixed with ones the same colour as her eyes. He just hoped that Mira liked them.

Cullen was quickly drawn out of his musings by a series of sharp knocks at the door. He practically leapt up to answer, the sun had set and the walls of Skyhold were being bathed in a pleasant fading light but nothing, nothing could take his breath away from the sight of the woman who greeted him at his door.

**

 

Cullen stared at her, his mouth agape as he practically gawked at the woman in his door way. She had her hair up, red locks loose around her face to soften the braids that made the rest of her hair flow down her back. She practically glowed like a vision of Andraste in the setting sunlight.

_Mira Trevelyan_.

 

“You clean up nicely Commander.” Mira smiled, she was holding two green bottles. _Ah the cider she promised._

“As do you. You look as stunning as always Mira.” He replied, gesturing for her to come inside. As she did she was pleasantly surprised with the new seating arrangement in his office… and the delicious smells coming from the covered trays on his new table.

 

“Well, this is lovely.” She called from over by his new seating area. Cullen locked the door behind her, before moving behind his desk to collect the flowers he had hidden there. Her back was still turned to him as she lifted the lids on their dinner.

“This looks delicious! Maker the kitchen staff have really outdone themselves.” She continued to chat casually, there was a slight rush in her voice, maybe she was just as nervous as he was.

 

He quickly crossed the room to her, flowers in hand as she set up the small table for dinner. Sensing Cullen’s new-found closeness Mira turned up to look at him and seemed surprised to see the flowers in his hand.

“A wise man once told me, that when meeting a beautiful lady, one should bring flowers.” Cullen smiled, the light from the fireplace hiding his blush as he held out the flowers to her. Mira stared at him for a second before breaking into a beautiful smile and accepting the bouquet, bringing them to her noise to inhale.

 

“Cullen they’re beautiful thank you. Wait. You think I’m beautiful?” she asked looking up at him curiously, the flowers resting just under her chin, as she tried to fight back a grin.

“Yes, yes you are.” as Cullen spoke his blush started turning his face a more noticeable shade of red but the smile that Mira returned at his words made it all the more worth it.

 

“That’s… Thank you Cullen. Here I brought you something to!” She smiled holding the flowers close to her as she reached under her cloak to what looked like a hidden pocket and pulled out a small green bottle. “Cassandra mentioned you sometimes had headaches, so I managed to distil a tincture that should help with some of the pain.” Mira smiled handing him in the small vial, Cullen returned her smile tenfold feeling touched that she had thought to think of him at all.

“And well, if you don’t like that I brought the Cider.” Mira laughed as she gestured to her twin bottles on the table, much to Cullen’s surprise and responding laughter. _Of course, he liked his gift, she gave it him._

 

“I like it, thank you. So, dinner?” Cullen asked as he placed the small vial on his desk behind him as Mira pulled off the covering from the plates, as she did he was instantly hit with the smell of food hit him.

“Is that – Is that roast Chicken? H-how did you?” Mira asked, slightly surprised that he knew about her favourite dish, that being said it was one of the only nice dishes she could make, other than camp stew.

 

“How did I what?” he replied with a smirk tugging at his lip as he started loading the plates with the accompanying vegetables. Potatoes, carrots, peas, broccoli. All looking delicious. _He’d have to thank the chef._

 

“How did you know that was my favourite?” she smiled, watching him grin in delight as he served her dinner, much like that night in Haven.

 

“I don’t know, a little bird told me.” he grinned as she took the opportunity to bump him gently with her hip.

“Oh, and would this bird happen to be a Nightingale?” Mira chuckled, as he plated up the sliced chicken, sneakily swiping a piece of skin from the plate when he thought she wasn’t looking. Which earned him another bump as Mira stole the second piece he was aiming to eat, right out of his fingers.

“More like a rather helpful cook.” He laughed returning her smile, his eye’s crinkling slightly as she poured some Cider for the two of them.

 

The pair laughed easily as the movements came naturally to them, working in tandem with one another to prepare the meal and sit down on the couch to eat. The meal was cooked to perfection, so much so that Cullen made a mental note to send the cook a reward or something but most of his thoughts were now focused on the beautiful woman sitting curled up on the couch opposite him.

Her cloak had been discarded behind the couch as she slouched into a more comfortable position for chatting while she nursed her third mug of cider, smiling happily at him. He grinned as he told her a story about his days in Templar training.

 

“And he just wouldn’t stop! The Revered Mother was starting to get suspicious but he kept at it and every morning he would move another thing in her office, just one and only a little bit so she didn’t realise at first but it just kept going. One morning she walks in there and every single object had been moved three inches to the left and the entire office was bathed in glitterdust! I was standing outside changing the oil in the lanterns along with another recruit and oh the look on her face, she stormed right down to the barracks and demanded that the person responsible show himself, all the while shaking glitter everywhere she moved!” Cullen laughed, remembering fondly how long it took to get rid of all the glitter dust from her office, a job in which all the recruits had a hand in completing.

 

“Oh Maker, that is- oh. Isn’t Glitterdust flammable?” she laughed, talking through her giggles.

“Yes, it is! Every time the mother would leave her office, all the torches would spark as they caught the bits of dust in the air. Maker knows how she didn’t catch fire!”

 

Mira threw her head back as a trill of laughter spilled from her throat, which made Cullen laugh as well. _Maker how was she so perfect? He hasn’t laughed this hard in years!_

 

She managed to stifle her laughter as she shook her hand in front of her face clearly remembering another story.

“Did you – did you know there’s a song about me!” she giggled, clearly feeling some of the more pleasant side effects from her drink.

 

“I’m sure there’s many songs about you now you’re Inquisitor.” he teased, leaning forward to share the last few drops from the bottle between their two cups.

 

“No, in Rivain! Yes, I once manged too single handily and rather accidentally walk into a bar fight consisting of the leaders from two of the biggest Mercenary companies in Llomerryn. The two Captains were bumping chests and exchanging insults and as stupid as it sounds. As I turned from the bar, ready to leave with my last drink in hand… I walked into them, really straight into the two of them. My drink goes flying back, spilling the entire mug all over me! But, I had been drinking slightly beforehand so my judgement might not have been at its best. So, I shouted at them, really gave them a piece of my mind and the bar goes silent. The two men are struggling to look at the mess the drink had made and what I was later told was the murderous expression on my face.” Mira paused to try and imitate the expression before she fell back into giggles.

“One of the men behind us shouted out something along the lines of _Shut that woman up!_ And so, I turned and threw my empty cup at him, caught him square in the face! Knocked him off his chair to! The two Captains were now looking at each other in with wary expressions on their faces before the taller one just starts to look at his feet and mumbles out _We’re sorry miss, we didn’t mean to make your drink spill,_ while the other one starts taking off his coat and orders his men to get me another drink. It turns out the two had been arguing over the same woman to which I gently but firmly put them into their place because it was clear the woman didn’t like either of them, I even got them to start working with each other on occasion. We’re all good friends now.”

 

“Hardened Mercenary’s! And you just shouted them into submission. Maker, what was the name of the song?” Cullen laughed, eye’s now prickling with tears at how animated she had been as she told the story.

“The Mighty Lioness. It had lines like _Oh Lioness, she was the mightiest, with a terrifying roar, like you never heard before._ ” Mira sang, it seemed like a hearty pub song but the way Cullen was laughing with her story made her drunken rendition all the more worth it.

“I’m gonna have to ask our resident bard to find that one, after that story I want to hear the whole thing.” He smiled lifting his mug to his lips only to realise it was empty. He sighed softly putting the empty mug on the table.

 

“Mmm, so I take it you liked the Cider?” she smiled, her own drink long empty and sitting on the floor.

“Very much so, it was lovely thank you.” He stretched out into the corner of the couch shifting slightly to get comfortable. Mira watched him with intrigue, eye’s drifting over his splayed-out form. She couldn’t help but bite her lip when his shirt road up slightly to revel his toned stomach. Cullen, not noticing the Inquisitors suggestive staring, extended his arm with a lazy smile to invite her to come snuggle against him, a gesture in which she happily complied.

 

He smiled, the drink only slightly fogging his mind but he managed to focus on her. Her warm weight against his side, the arm tucked around her just resting on her waist, the smell of her hair as she leant against his shoulder caused him to idly capture a lock of her long red hair and loop it around his fingers and play. She sighed happily, letting him fiddle with her hair. She rested a teasing hand against his chest as he leaned back in relaxation, watching him with a crooked smile.

“Hey?” she started, turning her head up to look at him.

He hummed back, still playing with her hair.

 

“I’m sorry for how I acted last night. I received some news… didn’t know how to handle it so I got way drunker than I expected. I’m sorry you had to deal with me like that.” She spoke quietly, fingers tracing random and swirling patterns over his chest.

He let go of her hair to squeeze her shoulder reassuringly.

“No, it’s okay, I’m sorry I was so short with you. You just caught me off guard, and I hope you aren’t mad but Varric gave me the letter. I’m sorry about your sister.”

 

She paused in surprise for a moment, “Thank you… but now that he’s gone. That will hopefully be over. Anyway, I have a question?” she shifted, sitting up to look at him.

He smiled kindly, also moving into a better position as she swung her legs over his lap almost as an afterthought.

“A question? What about?”

 

“Chess.”

“Oh?”

 

“Yes, chess. You know Cullen; you’re rather handsome. Mmm and clever. Yes, handsome and clever.” She smirked, fingers slowly stroking his chest. She felt his breathing hitch at her words, his heart beat faster. He watched her with interest, clearly waiting for her to do something... and slightly suspicious about what that was.

“Alright. Thank you?” he replied cautiously. She was moving again, raising herself up to face him, knees moving either side of his lap as she straddled over him.

“You’re welcome.” She smiled, slowly lowering her weight onto him, she had his complete and utter attention. He watched her, feeling the heat rise to his cheeks, the hand, that had been idly stroking his chest had shifted to a single course, running up the centre of his chest, heading for his chin.

“Handsome and strong and _far too clever to lose at Chess._ ” She smirked, capturing his jaw in the palm of her hand.

 

“Ah well, I can explain.” Cullen stammered, she was close, so close, her eyes drifted to his lips as her tongue peaked out to wet her own. _Sweet Andraste’s flaming tits._

“Of course, and I want to hear all about it later but for now I would very much like to kiss you.” Mira paused giving Cullen time to consider. The fingers on his jaw were gentle, soft even knowing all the harsh things she’s done. _Maker he wanted her_.

 

“Are you sure this is a good idea? That this is what you want?” He asked trying to hold himself still but he could feel her against him, underneath his traitorous fingers and _oh how he wanted._

 

“You make me happy Cullen.” She smiled, fingers still twitching on his jaw, “I’m not drunk, I’m here at dinner with you and you brought me flowers… I don’t know where this will go Cullen or what will happen to us… but I willing to try.”

Both hands were cupping his jaw, just waiting from him to respond.

“I would like that. Maker’s breath Mira you are the most stunning woman I’ve met and I, _you_ , Mira you’re more wonderful than I deserve.” He sighed happily, the smile spreading out on his face to stay. He spoke low, as if he was admitting a treasured secret. His fingers stroked at her waist the fabric of her shirt felt soft under his fingertips.

 

She surged forwards suddenly as she kissed him, soft lips startling his own into action as he moaned into her mouth. She tasted like the Cider and something more, something that was so undeniably her that it set his blood to boil. His hand slid into her hair, sliding under the braid so he could tangle his fingers into her locks and use his other hand to pull her into his lap, deepening the angle of the kiss. Noses bumping, Teeth knocking and tongues battling for dominance. Quite easily the sloppiest kiss he’s ever done, much like how they kissed in the tent, desperate and uninhibited… but by the Maker as his witness this was _Perfect._

 

“Hah, that was. Oh maker, that was-” Cullen gasped once she pulled away, he followed her lips for a few seconds only to realise he needed to breathe.

“I believe that was a kiss, although I can’t be sure it’s all a blur.” She giggled, throwing the commander a flirtatious look, inviting him into kiss her this time.

 

He chuckled at her comment smiling this time as he leaned into her. He moved slower this time, intent on memorising everything about her. The way her eye’s fluttered shut just before he kissed her and the way her tongue would try and tease his own into submission, even the way she would bite his lip gently whenever they pulled apart to breathe or change position, as if she was afraid he wouldn’t come back.

 

“ _Mira_.” Cullen moaned as he tightened his grip in the back of her shirt, holding her against him. He was still holding back, slightly overwhelmed by the sheer amount of want he felt coursing through his bones.

“Mira are you sure you want to? _With me?”_ he asked again, breathless, and slightly shaking. She paused and flashed him that blinding smile that he’d fallen in love with, before she opened her mouth to reply. Her lips slightly swollen and reddened from the force of their kisses.

 

“Commander Cullen! Your presence is required down at the gate!” came the shouted words, but not from her mouth but from the other side of his door. A door that had strict orders not to be disturbed!

 

“ _No._ ” Mira sighed hanging her head forwards slightly in a way that Cullen didn’t know whether she was talking about the voice at the door or answering his previous question but she must have been able to tell his confusion by the look on his face or the way his arms suddenly shifted to give her space.

“No! No to him at the door, not you. Never no to you. Defiantly yes to you.” Mira struggled caught between wanting him and needing to attend to duty.

 

“Good! Ah that’s good, cause I want you to.” He sighed pulling her forwards for a gentle kiss. She rested her forehead against his for a moment, unwilling to break the moment, only to have it forcefully broken by the messenger banging on the door.

She sighed in disappointment, she didn’t want to get up, she wanted to stay right here!

 

“To work?” he chuckled, nudging her nose with his to make her smile. She nodded quickly before they broke apart to right themselves, he turned to answer the door but ended up tugged back towards Mira as she stood on the chair to fix his hair with a laugh.

“Coming, coming.” He called out absently as she leaned in to kiss his neck, giving him a goofy smile as she let him go.

 

“Ah! Sir, I know you left orders not to be disturbed, and I’m sorry sir, but there is a woman at the gate and she’s demanding she speak to either you or Master Tethras, and the dwarf won’t waken! Please sir, she’s threatening to burn down the gates! She’s already shot lightning at us!” the guard spoke quickly obviously fearful for disobeying the commander’s previous orders.

“She’s a mage? And she’ll only speak to me or the Dwarf?.... _Shit._ Guard, Hallsy was it? Head back to the gate, let her know I’m on my way. Don’t let her leave and try to dissuade her from destroying anything else.” Cullen ordered waiting for the guard to start running back down to the gates before he closed the door and took a breath, resting his head against it as he tried to fight off the swimming feeling his brain was doing.

 

“Who’s at the gate?” Mira asked as she gathered up her hair into the braid, it was a common thing for her to do if she thought she would be fighting and somehow, she had gotten her hands on two of his throwing daggers and was now strapping them to the specially designed tags on her coat.

“I think It’s the Champion of Kirkwall, but why she’s here now I have no idea…. We never really got on.” Cullen sighed as he quickly headed behind his desk to his armour stand and collected his sword and shield. If he knew the Champion, she would either try to take him down with words or fireballs depending on her mood and after the Chantry…. After Meredith, he didn’t blame her.

 

 “Marian Hawke? Well then. Shall we see what she wants?” Mira shot Cullen a lopsided grin before she leaned up to tuck one of his stray curls back into line, pressing a kiss to his cheek as she did. He smiled softly back at her before they both started to head for the Gate.

 

_Marian Hawke… Well..._

_Cassandra’s going to lose her shit when she finds out._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Interrupted just before they get to the good stuff!  
> Don't worry though! Because i'm a filthy liar and once a week updates don't apply to the good stuff!


	15. (Part 2) and it lead to this. (CullenXMira NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After a brief interruption from an unexpected visitor, Cullen makes good on his promises and Mira, oh she sings.

 

_Chapter 15 (Part 2)-  and it lead to this._

_CullenXMira NSFW_

 

“Listen to me little man. If you tell me to calm down one more time I will turn this castle to rubble, do you hear me!? Produce the Dwarf or the Commander or I will start setting people on fire!” the woman yelled, fire whipping around her as she stood there yelling. The draw bridge had been pulled up for the night and the gates closed.

“We cannot rouse the Dwarf miss and the Commander’s on his way. Now please, for the love of the Maker. Stop throwing fire balls at me!” Rylen yelled back to the woman, dodging yet another fireball that was aimed at his head.

 

“LOWER THE BRIDGE!” Cullen yelled as he approached the gatehouse.

“And open the Far Gates!” Mira followed, she was poised for battle. Knives ready under her fingertips as they both marched towards the gate, noticing the fire flashing from atop the wall.

 

“Ah bout time.” The woman muttered as she slowly started to control her magic into something more approachable lest she char the draw bridge.

 

“State your name and your business here and why in the Void you’re throwing fire at my men!” Cullen barked as both he and Mira made their way across the bridge.

 

“Knight-Captain, I would say it’s a pleasure but I would be lying.” The woman laughed, fire licking at her heels as she approached the pair.

“So, it is you Hawke.” Cullen sighed, signalling his men to call off the arrows they had trained on her.

 

“Yep. Who’s your friend? Did you finally learn how to talk to women?” Hawke smiled, fingers still twitching although she didn’t seem to be trying to cast anything.

“Oh? He talks to me _quite_ well.” Mira chuckled, ignoring the slightly embarrassed look from Cullen as she extended her hand to the Champion.

“Inquisitor Mira Trevelyan. I for one am happy to meet you, Varric tells the most wonderful stories. Now you must know because I can’t figure it out, his crossbow Bianca. Just how intimate is he with that thing?” 

“Marian Hawke and to be honest I couldn’t figure it out either! Isabella has a running bet going on whether or not he thinks it’s a real person.” Hawke laughed accepting the other woman’s hand and greeting, which left Cullen looking comically lost between the two.

 

“Ah Isabella, let me guess. She thinks it’s a real person and she claims that it’s from her years of experience?” Mira asked as the two of them made their way towards the keep. Cullen frowned still trying to keep up with how quickly the two women moved in conversation.

“Hah, yes! How do you know Isabella? We’re you a friend or a _friend_?” Hawke asked suggestively, watching the way Mira glanced back at Cullen.

“Oh, the stories I could tell about that woman. But she got me out of a horrible bind and for that I consider her a friend. May I ask why you’ve come to the Inquisition?” Mira asked curiously. Cullen perked up at the conversation, turning to look at Hawke waiting for her response.

 

“Ah I came to see about this whole Corypheus business and well, because Varric asked.”

 

“Well, that’s good. Do you mind terribly if we continue this in the morning when I’m slightly more coherent?” Mira asked pulling a tired smile. Cullen caught the look, _oh I see what she’s trying to do._

“Burning the midnight oil, are we?” Hawke smirked as she looked over a Cullen’s quick scowl. “By all means Inquisitor, until tomorrow.” She saluted as one of the guards led Hawke away to the guest quarters.

 

 

“Sir, was that the Champion of Kirkwall?” Rylen questioned coming up behind the Commander.

“Yeah, Rylen? Make sure Varric isn’t within sight when Cassandra finds out.” Cullen sighed rubbing his head, the alcohol was fading now being replaced by a dull headache. Rylen snickered slightly and started ordering the guards around the gatehouse back to their duties, leaving both Mira and Cullen standing alone in the courtyard.

 

 

“Well this is certainly not how I pictured tonight night turning out.” Mira smiled, hands now fiddling with her hair. She looked up at him through her eyelashes, drawing him closer with a crook of her finger.

“No? What did you imagine?” Cullen smirked, coming closer to pull his arm around her waist, leaning down slightly in a move to kiss her.

“It involved way less clothing and much more moaning on your part. Oh, the things I want to do to you… you know my quarters aren’t far, right? If we’re quick we can escape before Josie or Leliana drag us to a Council meeting.” Mira purred, pressing against the Commanders frim body as she spoke quietly into his ear. Her breath teasing him, causing this dark pit of want to settle in his stomach.

 

“Oh, only if we’re quick huh. So, what if I kissed you here?” Cullen smirked leaning into her, enjoying the way her breath ghosted over his own lips and her eye’s darkened in want.

“Then I don’t think we’ll be able to stop kissing you before those guards come back, and I wouldn’t want to stop. So, will you come to bed with me Cullen?” Mira asked, giving him time to consider. She wanted him to choose for himself, she didn’t want to force him to do anything, _not like she was forced to do things._ This wasn’t another distraction… this, this was something they _both_ wanted.

 

She got her answer not through words but through his actions as he suddenly lifted her up, her legs wrapping around his hips as he carried her up the stairs towards the main hall. Cullen rejoiced in the surprised gasp she gave as he lifted her using all his strength and speed to spirit them away, the only thing he might have changed were the shield now knocking against his shoulders as he raced to the keep.

“ _Cullen_.” She moaned, leaning in to kiss his neck, enjoying the scent of him and soap as it lead her to nibble on his ear. Cullen nearly stumbled at the contact, having to pause for a second as they passed into the Main Hall, the guards were on rotation, there was nobody here guarding the Inquisitor’s quarters. The perfect moment to slip in side, _to slip inside her._ The whispered thought whipped through his mind, leaving his mouth dry and his palms hot.

 

As they closed in on the door that lead to Mira’s quarters Cullen smiled as Mira whispered for him to put her down so she could unlock the door. The way her fingertips brushed through his hair as he set her down made him flush in yet another delightful way, he watched her arse wiggle enticingly as she shoved the door open, leading him forwards in her wake. The smirk on her lips told him she was think of something as he locked both doors behind them as she headed up the stairs into her room.

 

He stalked his way up those stairs, approaching her like a predator closing in on the sweetest prey but she did not cower, did not flinch but met his approach with a fiery, his _goddess of fire_. She smiled, sultry and teasing as she slowly shrugged off her coat, letting both it and her daggers fall to the floor behind her.  

 

“Ah I think that would be my job Mira.” He growled, setting down his sword and shield quickly, placing them by the stairwell before resuming his approach. His hands came to rest around her waist, drawing her into a kiss as the two of them plucked at the buttons on her low-cut shirt, occasionally batting the others hands away to work. When the stubborn thing loosened and dropped to join her coat, Mira’s hands moved to the far easier conquest of tugging off Cullen’s shirt.

 

“Oh. Wow.” Mira whispered as she took in the sight of him, the ridged muscles built from a life of being a Templar, the scars from old forgotten wounds, the hard planes of his chest dusted by the blonde chest hair. She tried to count the scars, there was scars that littered up his arms, cuts and nicks from various blades, scared over a lifetime of training. Then there was the more serious wounds. A long scar that travelled over his right shoulder, caused by someone bringing their sword down through his armour, still red and raised meaning it was still healing naturally… Kirkwall most likely. There was also an interesting burn that travelled over his lower left rib, obviously old and healed with magic, as it was only discernible by the a small slightly raised patch of silvery skin. She sighed at the sight of him, muscled and scared, a Warrior’s body… _Her Warrior’s body._

 

“Keep staring at me like that my lady and I’ll start to blush.” Cullen smirked, flexing his muscles slightly, making her mouth dry, as he reached for her again. His arms circling her, letting her greedy hands roam over his arms and chest, those curious fingers even pinching his nipple, drawing out the most delightful surprised gasp.

 

“Maker’s breath Cullen, kiss me.” She moaned dragging his head down to her, crashing their lips together in a burning kiss that left them both panting.

“ _Mira_ , I want – oh fuck I want you.” Cullen growled back in-between breaths. The shock of Cullen actually slipping into a growl and swearing, it sent shivers down Mira’s spine.

 

“Bed, Bed! Get on the bed Cullen!” Mira laughed brightly as she pushed him towards her large and very expensive bed… _Much better than a camp cot._

 

She smirked as he stumbled back onto the soft mattress, sinking in slightly as he sat. He chuckled at her antics but stayed as ordered… and watched as she peeled out of the last of her clothing. She kicked off her boots first, bending down slightly to tug at them. Her breasts were still hidden, tightly bound by her navy-blue breast band, but he could see how large they were, how much give and softness lay hidden away by that damned band.

She brought herself back to full height, the low roll of her shoulders as her red hair draped down around them, the quiet swagger that she owned so well, teasing him with its allure. Her eyes locked with his, that look alone sent a hot flash of heat to his loins that made his trousers tighter by the second.

The look shifted into a teasing grin she drew his gaze down her body to the hands resting atop her leggings. Slowly she began to peel them down her legs until teasingly, she caught the hem of her smalls with her thumb as she went, pulling them down slowly, so he could see the top of her sex - see that she was shaven all the way down-  before she let her thumb slip free, letting the dark silk snap back in place as she kicked her legs free from her leggings.

 

He groaned loudly at her tease. _Maker take his tortured soul. He needs her more than anything in this world. She’s perfect, gorgeous, glorious, oh how I love you! My Goddess of fire, My Mira._

 

“Andraste preserve me.” Culled whispered, pulling himself back as his eyes drank in her image. He had never seen her fully out of her armour or her clothes before, she was more beautiful than he could ever imagine. Pale skin freckled from when it had seen time in the sun, and scars from her time spent running. He **needed** to learn each and every one of her scars with his mouth and hands. She giggled, free and happily as she turned back to kick her clothes out of the way… as he did he saw _it._

He had to fist his hands in the bedding to stay put, to follow her instructions. His eyes tracing the image. A Tattoo! The black outline of a Lioness, clearly in a Riviani style, neck bared as it looked both soft and fearsome on her hip with the simple design. He must have made some noise or she was expecting his reaction because she laughed slightly, looking at him over her shoulder.

 

“Ah, I got that when I was drunk one night. Too much singing.” Mira chuckled as she gave her hips a little wiggle for him before she turned and swaggered towards the bed.

 

She crawled into his lap, her legs straddling over his, letting their sex’s brush together as they both pressed up against each other. Hands in each other’s hair as they met for a heady kiss, he could get drunk on kissing her. One hand stayed in her hair, while the other travelled down her back, he splayed his hand out over the small of her back, brushing the tattoo with his thumb and enjoying the way she’d shiver at his touch. He could feel her rocking over his straining breaches, he could _feel_ how hot she was and how good she felt over him.

His hand raised higher up her back, fingers teasing the latch of her breast band waiting for some sign from her to continue. She rocked down on him _hard_ causing him to gasp out against her mouth at the sensation, he pulled his head back from her kiss to gather his wits as she continued to rock _. Maker’s breath if she kept that up he was going to spill in his pants._

“Cullen, take it off.” She growled, she slowed her rocking for a moment to press a line of love bits and kisses against his neck.

 

Cullen wasted no time in removing the band and marvelled at how lovely her breasts were, how they spilled from the tight band that held them in when she needed to fight. Slowly he ran his thumb against the underside of each breast, marvelling in the softness of her skin as he gathered each breast into his hands, feeling the weight, the give, oh maker just the squish of them as they spilled out against his fingers.

_It was better than anything he could have dreamed._

 

He couldn’t hold back anymore as he quickly lowered his head to take one of those delightfully pale pink nipples into his mouth, moaning in euphoria as it began to harden against his tongue.

Mira’s breath quickened gasping slightly as he sucked and worried his teeth gently over the bud. Quickly she dragged his hand from her waist, over to her neglected breast, where she guided his thumb to her nipple in teasing flicks, squeezing his hand around her breast in a way that had her moaning his name. After a few more moments of worshipping her right breast with his mouth he switched sides, intent on showing the same attention to the other.

When he raised his hand to now thoroughly suckled bud, he found his movements halted by her hand, as she again captured it and redirected him. This time down, over the swell of her hip and towards the band of her now soaking smalls.

 

She turned his hand over so she could use his fingers to tease herself, running them over the outside of her smalls, pressing them up against the wet silk. He moaned in wonderment when she leaned up to pull the fragile silk away, letting him help as he pulled her last item of clothing away from her. Her hand was quick to return back over his, guiding him back towards her centre, when he felt her, how wet and warm she was, how heady her scent was… he knew he had to taste her.

 

 

He pulled back from her breast, both nipples now hard red buds, as he turned his gaze to look at her. Her eyes were half lidded, watching him with a look that told him she wanted this as much as he did, her lips red and plumped from their passionate kisses, and her hair was scattered over her shoulders in red waves that matched the heated expression on her face.

 

 

He watched her face as he slipped his fingers slowly inside her, feeling the warmth shudder up his arm. Her eyes closed and her face relaxed as she breathed out a soft moan of contentment as he pumped two fingers inside her. He smiled as she raised her hips, riding on his fingers as she purred into his ear to add another one. She rode him, like the horse masters her family were renowned for, rolling her hips in time with his thrusts as he slouched underneath her, her posture sure and strong… _and most importantly keeping her breasts close to his mouth._

 

“Open your eyes.” He ordered softly, moving his free hand away from her breast and down her body to her hip, holding her gently to slow her movements. Her eyes opened to look at him, blue eyes coming into focus, full of want, full of need, **_For him._**

“Watch.” He smirked as he slowly pulled his fingers from her and raised them to his mouth. The taste of her was something he could not hope to describe, not even all the poets in all the lands could even hope to convey how she tasted to him, how simply perfect she was.

 

He watched her eyes darken as he licked his fingers clean, listened to soft gasp shift into a feral moan as he his fingers were tugged out of his mouth! His vision filled with a beautiful red head as he was suddenly forced backwards while she retaliated. She kissed him everywhere, frenzied, and wild! Starting with his jaw, his neck, moving over his chest, teeth and tongue claiming him as her own for the world to see! It was only when she did manage to find a sensitive area just over his collar bone did he laugh, guiding her back up to his lips as they both giggled at their actions. He had fallen back into the bed, with Mira settling on top of him like she belonged there, like she was made to reside on top of him.

 

 

The feeling that washed over him, the happiness he felt almost surprised him. The swell of emotion that tightened his chest, not the fear he felt when he thought of Haven, nor the rush of confusion and desire when he tries to woo her… This warmth, this happiness… she felt right. She felt like home.

_I love you._

He wished he could tell her. He wished he could tell her and not fear she run away. No, don’t say it. _Can’t say it!_ Not worthy, don’t deserve her, not worthy of her love. This is a gift you cannot squander Cullen, she let you in, she’s let you be here, with her! Don’t waste it with stupidity. Not now. _I can’t lose her now._

 

 

“Mira, you are amazing. You taste amazing.” Cullen moaned, settling his minor panic with compliments as she kissed him, her giggling body still resting over his own.

“Oh?” she chuckled moving her hair over to one side so she could see him. “Then why don’t you taste some more **_Commander_**.” She purred, her nails running gently over his scalp as she moved to kiss him again. Her laughter rang out as he flipped them both over, her hair splaying out around her head like a lion’s main. She smiled up at him and he took her all in, fingers running over small scars, mouth following her body down as he tasted her skin all the way down from her neck to the inside of her thigh.

 

“Mira. Keep your eyes on me.” He commanded again, idly running his hands up and down her thighs. She brought her head up to watch, quickly pulling one of her pillows behind her to make the angle easier.

“You gonna keep staring all night Commander or are you actually going to do something?” Mira chastised after a few moments where he just continued to watch her, hands still running back and forth softly.

 

“Patience.” He teased, lips curling into a smirk. Mira looked at him and she swore she could have punched that smug look of that handsomely scared mouth, then kissed it. Oh, she wanted to kiss it so bad.

“Cullen.” Mira growled, moving her hand to his hair in an attempt to pull him forward. Cullen quickly cut her off, capturing both hands and pinning them to her thighs under his own hands. He smiled softly, feeling that he’d let her stew for long enough. He leaned in close, close enough for her to feel his breath against her sensitive clit, she’d been rocking against him for long enough to make it twitch with each breath.

 

“ _Cullen please._ ” She moaned, a tinge of desperation echoing in her voice.

 

Her hands had stopped fighting him and now dug into her own thighs, her nails leaving deep indentations in the pale flesh and her eyes. Her eyes never left his, she watched every move he made with eager anticipation.

He smiled, giving into her as he ran his tongue over her sex, gathering her _exquisite_ juices to spread them to her clit where he made a move to circle it with his tongue before moving down and repeating the whole process again the whole time his eyes never left hers. Mira watched him work, both in awe and in rapture from his mouth, her moans catching in her throat with each flick of his tongue.

_Maker how is he so good at this!_

Cullen worked slowly at first, flicking his tongue and lips out to each part of her sex, measuring and assessing her reactions to determine what she liked best and put it to use. After a few nudges from her knee on his shoulder Cullen moved from the spot he was testing and back to her clit, capturing it gently between his teeth.

The loud cry that Mira gave at the sensation startled Cullen momentarily into freezing but when he saw how her back arched and heard the litany of _Please_ that followed, he smiled inwardly and decided to gently abuse the captured flesh in his mouth with gentle flicks of his tongue.

 

“ _Fuck Cullen!_ ” Mira cried out again, hips bucking against him so fiercely that he had to use most of his strength to hold her down, instantly removing his teeth so not to hurt her. He removed one of his hands from keeping Mira’s trapped, so she moved her freed limb to his head as he moved his to slide two fingers into her.

“Yes Cullen. Yes, Yes, _Yes_!” she had closed her eyes at this point, so close to the edge he could taste it on her as he started to lap at her clit, using his tongue to change from long broad strokes to quick circles. He noted how it made her arch again, legs straining by his ears and how her walls clenched around his fingers.

 

With a gentle crook of his fingers and a few more salacious sucks to her clit, she came. Shaking his world down with a magnificent gasping cry and the heat of her walls as her whole body clenched and shook with the force of her climax.

Cullen looked up at her in awe, her chest heaving eyes barely open, fluttering as she tried to watch him. He would never forget this sight, even if he lost all his other memories to Lyrium poisoning, even if he forgot his own name. He would remember this sight.

Slowly and with great care Cullen began to extract himself from her thighs, moving to sit back on his heels as he let her catch her breath.

 

“Cullen. That was… That was amazing.” Mira panted still trying to catch her breath. She leaned up on her elbow and showed him the most magnificent smile, a smile that filled her entire being. A smile that she shared with him.

 

“No, you are amazing. _Thank you._ ” Cullen grinned, his tone dropped to the one that makes her shiver, as he flicked his out along his scar to collect the slick that had gathered there.

 

Mira whined at the sight as she flopped back down into the bed.

“You are far too hot to be doing things like that. You’re going to make me gush.” She giggled nudging Cullen with her foot as he sat star struck just watching her, smiling like the cat who got the cream.

“Ah but you’re so beautiful when you do.” Cullen smirked as he crawled over her. He pressed hundreds of kisses up along her body all the way up until he reached her mouth, he cradled her face in both hands, watching in delight as she smiled brightly before as he kissed her. He tried to show her what she meant to him, the things she made him feel, that _This_ , whatever this was, was new and tentative for him. A deep warm feeling in his gut that made his head spin and his chest leap but oh he wanted her, he wanted her and never wanted to let her go.

Mira moaned heartily into the kiss, her arms coming around his shoulders to hold him close as their mouths melded together. Cullen simply melted against her.

Her legs grew restless in their spread position and so with a wicked nip to his lips Mira raised her thighs up and used her ankles to encircle him, bringing that sinfully hard lump in his breaches down to rub against her still wanting sex. Cullen was shocked by her move, losing himself for a few moments to simply rut against her, his hand fisted in her hair as he grunted wordless curses at her.

 

“hah, You minx. You are ah- perfect- ah _Mira.”_ Cullen gasped through clenched teeth as he slowed his rutting to catch his breath. His cock was bordering on painfully hard trapped against his breaches.

“Cullen, I need you. Please! I need you to fuck me.” Mira groaned loudly, her smaller body now rocking back against him desperately.

 

“Yes. Maker, yes Mira.” He moaned in agreement raising himself up out of her grasp so he could rip the ties to his breaches apart. With the fragile string now ripped to shreds Cullen wasted no time in pulling off his boots and pants having gone as he normally does on quiet days like today, without smalls. Mira’s throaty moan when his cock slipped out of his confines surprised Cullen somewhat. He glanced to the expression on her face, surprised, wanting and ever so beautifully aroused.

 

“Is everything to your liking?” Cullen asked smugly. Cullen was a modest man on most days, he knew he was larger than most men… but the look Mira was giving him right now made him feel like a fucking god.

“Cullen if I had known you were hiding that, I think I might have jumped you the moment we first met. Now come here handsome man.” Mira smiled drawing him down onto his side so she could kiss him deeply.

 

“Mira. H-how do you want to…” Cullen started, his hand resting gently on her waist as she stroked his chest.

“I think I’ll have you first on your back.” She spoke almost as if she was deciding on what wine to have with her dinner that evening.

 

“A-are you sure?” Cullen asked, well more like stuttered but he was just trying to make sure she was comfortable with her idea. _Maker’s breath but this was how he wanted her, this is how he **always**  dreamed of her. In his lap, bouncing on his cock with his mouth around her tits._

“Shuffle up the bed.” She prompted again with a smile, gesturing for him to make himself comfortable on her pillows.

 

Once settled with a pillow under his head Mira grinned and moved to straddle his thighs, just slightly lower than his cock. She took him in her hand softly at first just letting her finger tips run around the sheer thickness of his cock. Cullen moaned as her hand tightened around him, he rocked his head back as he stroked him.

 

“Ah, ah Cullen. Eye’s on me.” She taunted, thumb teasing the head of his cock smearing his precum around it. Cullen looked at her as she smirked between his legs, _When did she move?_ He couldn’t even hope to take his eyes from her now. She moved slowly down, her mouth pouting in a sinful manner as she descended towards his cock.

“Mira, fuck Mira lo- _oh-oof_. Y-you don’t have to.” Cullen groaned, his hand reaching for her face.

 

“Cullen, you make it sound as if don’t want to see _these lips_ over your cock?” Mira chuckled hand still stroking his cock, angling it towards her mouth.

“I uh- I wanted to please you, love, you don’t have to do anything for me.” He gasped, the endearment slipping though while his thumb stroked over her cheek.

“But I want a taste.” Mira whispered, her breath ghosting over the underside of his cock, causing Cullen to release a breathy moan.

 

“ _Mira_ oh maker.” He moaned as she took the head of his cock into her mouth, her wicked little tongue running over his cock as she took it deeper and deeper into her hot, wet mouth. He could lose himself to that mouth, whatever she commanded of him, whatever she did to him with it. Oh maker, if she kept swirling his cock with her tongue like that he was going to spill himself in her mouth.

“Mira, Mira please. If you keep doing that this is going to be over _far too soon_.” Cullen growled, gently pulling her head up until she relinquished his cock with a sinful pop. She laughed lowly, mostly at his enthusiasm and then again into his mouth as he pulled them both into a sitting position, the two of them flushed together.

 

He took his cock in hand as he teased the parted folds above him. His head catching on her sensitive clit as he coated himself with her slick. _Maker she was wet, he had made her this wet._ His mind purred at him as she slowly and without pressure from Cullen, lowered herself onto his cock taking him deep until his balls were flushed against her ass. The feeling was amazing, just like everything else about her. She was warm, wet and tight, her taut muscles rocking slightly against him, testing him as she enjoyed the stretch his cock gave her.

His heart was thrumming in his chest,  _she was here, they were here, together, doing this!_  He could feel her, feel her wrapped around his cock, feel her own heart racing under her skin. 

 

“You feel good Cullen. So, good.” She moaned, raising herself up as she started steady pace. He circled his arms around her, thrusting up in rhythm to her bouncing, her chest, her nipples scraping against the hard planes of his chest as they moved.

 

Cullen moaned in agreement, his head leaning down to her chest and with the help of his hand took one of her nipples into his mouth much to Mira’s pleased gasping moan as she rode him harder. The steady slap, slap, slap of skin on skin, her heady scent, her voice echoing around the room with plea’s like _Cullen_ , yes more Cullen, Fuck Cull like that.

She could feel his stubble on her breasts as he nuzzled them, his mouth teasing and pulling at her nipples as his cock, oh maker his magnificent cock. It filled her perfectly, the Maker never made a more wonderful cock. Thick and long, just on the right side of big. One that was perfect for slaking that dark tempting desires she held deep down, a deep clawing lust to fuck or be fucked until the pleasure was all she could think about. It tickled like fire on her insides at times and then in others made her want to dig her claws into someone and breathe them in with mindless lust.

And she wanted this, she wanted to dig her claws into Cullen and never let him go... _and that should scare her._

 

“Cullen harder, I can’t- I can’t keep-” Mira wailed her hand fisting in his hair as she tried to brace herself with her arm across his shoulder to use it leverage and throw her weight down on him. Faster, Harder, _more_ she wanted **more** of him.

Cullen broke her pleas with a sloppy kiss, all teeth, and snarls as he threw them both over, rolling until he was on top his cock slipping out in the process. The kiss slowed slightly, both of them breathing the other in deeply. With that kiss, Cullen managed to reposition himself and slide back into her tight heat. His thrusts went deep, deep enough to force them to part with how her body shook with each powerful thrust. Her legs were spread wide around his hips, enjoying the deep pleasure she was getting with the new angle but she knew she could get more.

 

“ _Cullen_ my legs, lift them- lift them higher, over your arms.” Mira panted through the force of his thrusts, she watched him through hooded eyes marvelling at the way his styled hair shook out of position, his curls poking out of the mess she had made of his hair. He nodded quickly shaking loose even more curls to Mira’s delight, hooking each leg over his arms. Cullen looked down to see Mira smiling at him, curious he slowed his thrusts down to deep rolls of his hips, making sure he was getting as deep as was pleasurable for her, a fact on which he gauged on her face.

 

“What are you smiling at?” he asked as he lent back, shifting into a half sitting position, fingers clutching at her flesh as he fucked her. He moved her again, moving her thighs to wrap around his waist and angling her hips with him keeping the slow rolling pace.

“Your hair. It’s starting to curl! _It’s glorious!!”_ she moaned, curling her fingers around his forearms.

 

“ _Glorious??_ Just how is it _glorious?_ ” he laughed, hiking her hips more onto his lap so he could pound her with his thrusts.

Mira whined loudly at the new angle, fingers clawing at the sheets when she realised she couldn’t quite reach him.

 

“ _Cullen Ah- **please!**_ ” Mira screamed her own fingers coming down to frantically circle her clit. Her walls fluttered threateningly around him, startling him away from his previous questions. He held himself up on his forearms as he leant over Mira’s body, angling himself to mind the strain of her hips as he fucked her faster. His cock pounded into her with this slick slapping sound that seemed to echo around the room and mingle with their breaths. Even the bed shook as it knocked against the wall under the power of their movements.

Cullen buried his face into the side of her neck, inhaling her scent as he pressed kisses to her skin, along with growls of pleasure. He felt her thighs tighten, the muscles going taut, she tightened around him so startlingly fast it shocked him, the pressure, the pleasure as she clamped down around his cock was almost too much too bare as she brought him hurtling towards the finish. _He had to hold on, she had to come first._

 

“ **Cull _en-AH!_** I’m gonna, oh fuck please I’m going t-” Mira cried out, her fingers now rubbing her clit at a blinding speed as she arched into his thrust letting out this beautiful scream as she came. The tight pulsing warmth of her as her wet essence slid down his still thrusting cock to drip off his balls, all of it, all of her, it drove him to madness! He had never seen someone so beautiful, so wonderful and to know he helped her do that!

He helped fuck her through it, keeping a steady pace for her to ride the heights of her orgasm for as long as she was able. His fingers even took over on her clit when she was too mindless to keep going and she cried her pleas at him, he wanted to make her as mindless as she made him. But his pleasure, his need for release was steady catching up to him he couldn’t hold back much longer.

 

 

“Mira, I need to, Mira I’m going to come! Where?” he gasped his warning into her ear, as he continued his stuttering thrusts. _So close, Maker so close._

“There, I want you to come there.” Mira moaned back, a deep shudder of lust running through her as she pulled him deep into her with her thighs. Holding his cock in as she gave a few last pulses of her hot walls around him.

 

“In? Are you sure?” he asked breathlessly, he was doing everything in his power to hold back, to make sure but he couldn’t keep this up.

 

“Yes. I want you to come in me Cullen, I want you to fill me up with your seed Cullen I want it to drip back down my thighs. Maker Cullen please.” She panted in his ear, her debauched and tempting words sending hot pulses to his cock.

_Fuck, fuck, oh fuck I love you._

The force of his orgasm was blinding, hot white pulses being spilt deep into such a beautiful woman had him seeing stars behind his eyelid as he groaned into her neck, practically crushing her to his chest as he came.

He gasped raggedly against her neck trying to gather back his senses. First to come back was his sense of smell, sweat, musk, sex and arbour blessing… her. Then his touch, the deep twitching pleasure of his cock still buried deep within her folds, tight heat and wet centre, her fingers carding gently through his hair. Sound next as the combine huffs of their breathing echoed through the otherwise quiet chamber…

 

“You know I don’t think anyone’s made me scream that loudly in bed before?” Mira chuckled quietly into his ear.

He leaned back to look at her, content, happy even and even more beautiful with her hair messily spread out around her head. Cullen chuckled back, obviously pleased by the praise as he took her lips in his gently, there was no sharp lustful bite to this kiss, it was slow and sweet.

 

“It was okay? Are you okay? Didn’t hurt you?” he asked, drawing back up to watch her response.

“I’m fine, great even! Cullen, _this_ , what you did was amazing.” She smiled, stroking his jaw with her thumb before moving her hands down his back. _It felt really good._

“What you can do with your…" her eyes flicked downwards for a second, " _Well_ , it’s a wonder women don’t line up at your door for it.” She joked softly as she came down to squeeze his buttocks in her hands. Sending another sensitive spike of pleasure through him to his cock, still buried within her.

 

“Well, it’s been awhile, I wasn’t sure.” He sighed happily when they broke apart, he went to stand, soft cock slipping out of her folds with a sensitive twitch as he searched for a cloth to clean them both.

“What’s _awhile,_ if I might ask?”

“Ah, about four years? maybe five?” he admitted in slight embarrassment. He found a cloth next to a bowl of water, quickly he soaked the cloth and wrung it out.

“That’s unexpected. A man like you, the women in Kirkwall must be blind and simple not to notice you! But I wish you told me before though, now I feel a bit selfish.” She sighed, stretching out on the bed carefully, keeping her hips tilted upwards as not to ruin the bed.

                                                                                                                                                                                

“Why?” he asked softly, coming back over to clean his mess from Mira’s folds. He was confused, why would she feel selfish, didn’t she know how blessed he was that she would chose to spend any time with him.

“If I had known, I would have paid more attention to you, a more equal share.” She sighed curling her legs underneath herself as she sat up, pulling him in for a kiss.

“Mira if you’d paid any more attention to me, this whole thing would have been a lot shorter.” He chuckled into her kiss as he reached down to clean his seed from her.

 

 

“Haha -Ah!” Mira gasped when the cloth came into contact with her folds. “It’s cold.” She mumbled to Cullen’s surprised face, she blushed slightly under the care he was showing her, making sure to clean as much as was comfortable. Before seeing to himself.

“Sorry. Do you, um, need me to get you anything? Potion, Witherstalk?” he offered nervously, he was unsure what the protocol here was. He came inside her, _Maker just the thought of that was making his cock twitch,_ but they were still at war, precautions needed to be taken.

“A sweet Ferelden man in my bed would be nice? If you want to stay that is.” She smiled, flopping back against the pillows of her soft bed.

 

“Oh-of course I want- but I meant- that is _well_ …” he fumbled as he was drawn down beside her, the bed was a lot softer than the flimsy cots they shared before. Warmer to... and she was _naked_.

“I know what you meant. But it’s okay, the tattoo I have,” she paused to guide his hand along the raised mark, “Its laced with Witherstalk and enchanted, it’s an old Riviani technique with women use there. Keeps me healthy and safe from _complications_.” She smiled, sliding up against his chest. The feel of her naked body against his, is all he ever wants.   _I love you, I want you, Maker I want to be with you until the day I die._

 

He smiled softly and tilted her face up to his, _oh this woman, this wonderful woman._ She was happy, it showed in her eyes, the smile on her face was honest and warm. He cradled her face like the precious thing she was as he kissed her. Lips slowly sliding against hers, the small hitch in her breath as he tried to tell her, _show her,_ how he felt. How much he loves her. Her fingers slid against the base of his neck, carding through his hair as he tried to show her.

_I love you, you wonderful woman. I love you and I’ll keep you safe and happy and-_ she moaned as his tongue swept into her mouth- _and I will always try to please you._

 

“Cullen, if this is you asking for another round. You’re probably going to have to wait until morning.” Mira giggled, pressing a chaste kiss to his nose and then cheek as he flushed. _Was she deflecting? Did she not know?_

He chuckled softly, pushing away the silly notions, of love and a future, to focus on her now, still dancing away from commitment. Dancing around him like a flickering fire.

 

“Oh, and I fully expect morning sex from you _Commander_.” She purred pressing one last kiss to his lips before she rolled over.

“But of course, _Inquisitor._ Your wish is my command.” He swore, pressing more kisses against her head as they settled.

 

Soft pillows beneath his head, a mattress that was both soft and firm to give him comfort. And the most beautiful woman in Thedas, naked in his arms, pressed up against his chest as they were both wrapped up in blankets that smelled like her perfume.

He smiled as she pulled his arm over her waist, her fingers intertwining with his to dim the light from the scar on her hand as she sighed in comfort. He just enjoyed the feel of her next to him, the intense rush of calm spread through him as he listened to her breathing even out and the ever so gentle puffs of snores. _Like a mouse._

 

He had her next to him, naked, happy, and _safe._ And if he had his way he would never let her go.

 

**

 

 

 

Also if anyone was wonder what Mira's tattoo looks like. but you know, smaller and on her back.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There we go, the start of something wonderful I hope. 
> 
> Also, cause you're getting this early and it's a double chapter upload, the next chapter might be slightly delayed. (I'm not happy with how it opens. i just need to re-write it.)


	16. The Morning After.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Morning after, slight NSFW and the return to actual plot!

 

 Chapter 16 Morning after.

 

 

Mira woke up gradually, happily even as she lazily stretched out against Cullen’s firm, muscled body, which was still spooned against her. It was warm, sedate, and perfect. She knew he was awake, she could feel it in his breaths... in the hard cock pressed up against her backside.

“Mmm morning Cullen.” She yawned rolling her hips along his cock in greeting. He groaned softly, a whisper of a thing as he pulled her back against him even tighter, wrapping both arms around her.

“Morning, you’re looking lovely today.” He rumbled against her neck, pressing a trail of lazy kisses down her shoulder.                                                                                                                                                                                

 

She giggled, delighting in the way his early morning scruff scraped against her skin teasingly.

“How do you know? Have you even opened your eyes yet?”

“No, but you’re still beautiful all the same.” He murmured, not stopping his lazy caresses.

 

She laughed softly at that, before rolling over, “You are far too sweet, Ferelden.” She nudged him over, straddling him while the blankets fell away. A chill took her as she leaned down over him, trying to burrow into the warmth of his chest.

 

“Are you cold?” he asked, pulling the blankets back around her. She just laughed, _how sweet is this man?_

“Oh, very cold, I think I should just go further under the covers.” She giggled, pulling the blanket over her head as she worked her way down his chest with kisses and teasing nips.

 

“Much further under. _Oh?”_

Cullen was stunned, there was a beautiful, charming woman, worshiping him. Kissing him, tasting his skin as her laughter lit up his morning.

“ _If I didn’t know any better, I think you’re happy to see me, Cullen.”_ She teased, just next to his cock.

 

Maker this was almost torture, he could feel her breath heat up his skin, her nails tease along his thighs, before her tongue swept up the length of his cock.

“ _Fuck._ Mira I- _oh maker._ ”

 

He moaned again as she sucked the head of his cock into her mouth, making her laughter rumbled along his cock.

                                                                                        

“Mira. That- so good.” She listened to him moan, as he tugged down on the blankets to look at her.  She ginned at him from around his cock, hair sticking up in ways he didn’t even know were possible. _She’s so… oh_.

Her actions interrupted his thought, as she pulled his shaft completely into her mouth.

_Maker I have to have her._

 

“Mira. - _ah- Mira._ Let me- _oh-_ let me- _just come here.”_ He growled, tugging on her shoulder. She complied willingly, still giggling around the head of his cock as he manhandled her into place. He brought her hips up onto his chest while her mouth stayed around his cock.

“Just let me- let me. Mmm.” He moaned, holding his arms around her thighs, both hands holding her ass as he pulled her wet core onto his mouth.

 

“ _ah- fuck Cullen.”_ Mira gasped, pressing her hips down towards his mouth as he palmed her ass.

“Mmmhm.”

His tongue thrust into her, desperate and wild, almost as if he wished to devour her. The angle was awkward, he hadn’t done it like this before, he’d heard about it though, ‘ _at length’,_ from his bunkmates in Kirkwall. It felt like everything was backwards and he didn’t have enough brain power to make that fact stick, mainly because he was distracted by her glorious mouth on his cock. 

 

A glorious mouth on his cock, that was currently humming.

_Fuck._

He couldn’t help the sudden thrust of his hips as she worked. As he did though he felt her whole-body tense as she choked on his cock. He hummed his apology against her while forcing his hips to remain firmly planted to the bed.

 

He doubled his efforts, his lips seeking out her clit as his tongue continued thrusting inside her.

“Mm, yes Cullen. Like that.” She moaned, pulling her head off his cock to stroke him with her hand. It was tight and fast, and _oh Andraste’s flaming sword_ her mouth was sucking at his balls.

 

He moaned into her, slurping at her as his saliva and her juices mixed and dripped against his tongue. He listened as her moans grew louder, higher in pitch as she stroked his cock almost forgetfully, too wrapped up in the sensations he was giving her.

She was close, he could tell in the way her thighs shook, her hips rolled against his tongue and the way her actions against his cock turned desperate. He wanted to make her come first but she was trying to do the same thing to him. Mouth sucking along the base of his cock, hand twisting on every stroke, clever fingers massaging his balls.

 

Mira broke first, thighs shaking around his face as she cried out. She ground against him as he sucked her clit, letting her juices drip against his chin. She slumped against him panting hard, hands still trying to get him off as her still panting mouth sucked hard against the head of his cock.

He came with a startled groan against her thigh, he was surrounded by the scent of her, the warmth of her and the feel of her mouth on his cock. He pulsed into her waiting mouth, her clever fingers still stroking his cock, cupping his ball. _He felt like he was drunk, so high on her, that he never wanted to stop._

 

She stroked him for as long as she could, only stopping when he whined against her thigh, digging his teeth lightly into the tempting flesh. The sensitivity was too much, everything was too much. He just wanted to hold her, regain his senses even with her slumped against him like she was with her ass in her face. _It was a nice ass._

Slowly and with great effort Mira pulled herself up from her sprawled out position on him, crawling and turning to slump face to face in his arms. Heavy with pleasure and exhaustion as he curled his arms around her.

 

“I-I haven’t done that before.” He sighed stroking her hair, he was still basking in it, the pleasant twitching in his cock, the taste of her on his tongue. _Again, he wants to do that again._

She turned to look at him suddenly, confusion and then joy spread out on her face as she beamed at him.

“Well, I’m glad I could help you with that.” She grinned, as she sprawled out against him, lips kissing every patch of skin she could find.

 

 _You are so wonderful._ He thought in-between their laughter.

 

The pair of them went on well after breakfast was served with a few of their companions noting the pair’s absence and sharing glances. Mostly it was a severely hungover Varric teasing Cassandra about what fun writing their romance would be and making Cassandra blush so brightly that the whole team knew something was up.

 

Cullen finally had to pull himself away saying he had to go see to the recruits but didn’t resist when she pulled him back in for another long kiss before finally letting him get up. He retrieved his clothes which had been thrown around the room the night before, and as he was pulling on his trousers, he quickly noticed the torn ties.

 

 

“Ah, I guess I was a little bit eager last night.” He chuckled gesturing to the ruined ties. Mira, looked up from her spot on the bed, following his movement and then laughed as well. She hopped up, naked body moving in a way that made Cullen want to take her again, and quickly strode across the room to her wardrobe as she searched for something to help him.

“Here, this should hold it together.” She smiled handing over a length of thin rope before turning back around to fish out her clothes for the day. “I’m gonna go talk to Hawke today, see what she’s here for. I’ll let you know if it’s anything important.” Mira continued as she pulled her clothes on.

 

Cullen smiled watching her dress, the lioness tattoo on her back stretching along with her movements as she fastened her breast band and pulled on her shirt. He went back to pulling on his shirt and fixing himself into a slightly presentable state before coming up behind Mira as she was fixing her hair in the mirror, braiding it over her shoulder. His smile was infectious as he slid his arms around her waist and pressed a kiss into her exposed neck.

 

“Cullen if you keep that up, people are going to start wondering where we are.” Mira giggled tying off her hair with a string as she leaned into his chest.

“I’m sure Rylen’s got the troops going through their morning rotations.” Cullen murmured against her neck, hands trailing lower over her belly as he _helped_ her fasten the buckles of her waist coat.

“My, my, how times have changed. Isn’t it usually your line on how we need to be responsible? Work comes first?” she teased, nudging him with her hip as she stepped out his grasp and pulled on her coat.

 

“Urgh. You’re right, sorry. It’s just you are so intoxicating and I am a very weak man.” He sighed with a love-struck smile as he used the mirror to fix his hair with his hands.

“Oh no, I rather like this side of you… and I have marks that prove otherwise to your _weakness_.” Mira teased tying her scarf around her neck, hiding a few of those marks from their earlier kissing.

“Oh I – I uh guess I got carried away. I didn’t mean to hurt you Mira.” Cullen faltered, hand coming to rub the back of his head nervously.

“I’m not complaining Cullen, I rather enjoyed getting them.” She grinned, handing him his sword and shield before leaning in for a quick kiss, one that Cullen couldn’t help but smile into.

 

“Now hurry up and go, before Cassandra comes barging in here!” she laughed again, shoving him towards the stairs.

“Alright I’m going! I’ll see you later?” he asked with a nervous yet hopeful smile at the top of the stairs.

“Of course. Go!” she smiled quickly moving in to leave him with a soft kiss and prodding him down the stairs.

 

She watched as he left with a boyish grin, closing the door behind him as he went. Where he would go… and exit straight into the main hall… right in the middle of breakfast.

 

“Shit no. Cullen wait!” she called in a loud whisper, rushing through the door after him.

Cullen paused, he’d barely gotten three paces down the stair when he turned back to her. His eyes flashing with intrigue… and _hope?_

“Mira?” he asked slowly, keeping his voice low to follow her example. He was waiting for something, she could see it in his eyes… but she didn’t think it was what she had in mind.

 

“You can’t leave through that door. It’s breakfast, everyone will see you leaving my quarters!” she told him in a dramatic whisper, her pretty blue eyes wide at the thought.

Cullen paused, the look in his own eyes faded at her concerns.

“Would that be so terrible? What could they do?” he asked, confused by her concern, but he wanted to understand.

 

“They could talk? They could ask questions, lots of questions, questions I’m not ready to answer yet. Word could get to our enemies and they could… it’s just best to keep this quiet, just for us…” she spoke quietly, fear obvious in her voice.

“Alright just for us, plus I don’t think the troops could handle such information without ribbing me.” He grinned, trying to make a joke like she does to relieve the tension. She grinned back at him, pleased by his efforts and his understanding.

“So, how do I get out then?” he asked, pulling her into him again. _Maybe he could just hold her like this all the time?_ _She always felt so good in his arms._

 

“This way,” she gestured for him to follow back up the stairs, “I found this the other day,” he watched as Mira felt around on the wall, just before the door leading to her quarters. There was a click as a latch was released and a hidden door swung open into the wall. “It leads straight down to the war room. You can leave though there and maybe say you were in the War Room planning? That’s believable, right?”

She led him through the small passage way, squeezing behind him when they approached the adjoining hidden door.

“Are you saying I work too much?” he joked, he knew he worked the jobs of 10 men.

 

“Well, I wasn’t gonna come out and say it.” She laughed, poking her head through to make sure the coast was clear. Curiosity got the better of him, as he leaned in behind her to check the surroundings as well. _It was a small corridor, he had to ‘check out’ his surroundings._

She pressed up against him, teasing him once again. She chuckled softly when he pulled her back, the hidden door closing as he pushed her into the wall. Mira gasped, eyes wide with mirth as he held her, his hands hold her hips as it was his turn to tease her, keeping his lips just a hairs-breath from her own.

“We’ll have to do this again.” She purred, arching herself against him.

“The sex? Or this up against the wall?” he returned, his lips brushing against hers as he dropped his voice to that low tenor she so liked.

“Mmm, both.”

 

He chuckled at that, leaning down to kiss her, a slow, soft, smouldering kiss that ached with wanting. A parting kiss, something that ached to be remembered in the long nights to come, as he gave her one last smile before he slipped through the hidden door.

 

Mira slumped against the wall for a moment, _Maker that man was good!_ The things he could do with his tongue, oh she would never ever get enough of that. Or his muscles or that cock. After finally having it, she was _convinced_ it was the most perfect cock the Maker ever made.

**

 

 

She sighed happily giving it another few seconds before she made her way into the main Hall. The last scraps of breakfast were still sitting on the tables as the people slowly made their way to their posts for the day, with none of them the wiser to her late-night activities. She moved through the hall quickly, managing to snag an apple and a honey roll before attempting avoid Leliana’s rather pointed look as she went off to find Varric. She hurried as she saw Leliana get up from her seat, obviously intending to talk to the Inquisitor, she almost even made it to the front door when the Orlesian woman’s voice rang out.

 

“Inquisitor, a word?” Leliana pointed to the hall way that led to the gardens. Mira sighed, nodding to the woman’s request as she followed her into the hall way.

To say she was a little afraid of Leliana was an understatement, this woman had a reputation even more feared than her own and she was scary religious, like her family.

 

“A little bird told me that you and the Commander are shall we say _involved_?” Leliana posed her question with all the trappings of a viper poised to strike.

“Your _little bird,_ is mistaken.” Mira returned calmly, unafraid and not backing down.

“Come now Inquisitor. I’m not saying I don’t approve, the Commander is a rather handsome man no? But I fear he is more fragile than you realise and I worry for him and for you my lady.” Leliana sighed, leaning against the wall as she spoke.

“It’s not my intention to hurt him Leliana. He is a friend.” Mira spoke softly, still denying their involvement as she moved to lean against the wall as they stood in the narrow hall.

 

 

“But I fear you might. He knows of your past but do you know of his? Do you know of his time in Kinloch hold? Of Kirkwall? He is a man whose endured some of the worst humanity has to offer and it changed him, he is better here. He smiles more but he is still guarded and I think some of those events haunt him even now.”

“Oh?” Mira paused, everyone knew what happened in Kirkwall. A mad Knight-Commander and a string of atrocities a mile wide… She knew Cullen had been the Knight-Captain there but she hadn’t really considered what that meant. And Kinloch, Finn had told her about what happened there, about the tower overrun with abominations and blood mages… and that only one Templar survived.

“You travelled with the Hero of Ferelden when you freed Kinloch, didn’t you? Am I right in assuming that Cullen was the-“

 

“Only Templar to survive? Yes, he was the only one to survive within the tower itself. I was with Audrey when we found him, he was captured in a cage I have never again seen the likes of, tortured by desire demons and abominations… forced to watch his friends die. Audrey knew him from her time in the tower, they were friends of a sort. She said that night _changed_ him, he was scared, angry at the mages who conspired with demons. He wanted us to use the right of annulment on the tower. To kill every last mage to make the tower safe again.”

 

Mira paused, _Why was she telling her these things!_ She knew Cullen had a wariness of magic but this didn’t sound like the man she knew now. Leliana caught on to what Mira was thinking,

“You have to understand, those were the ravings of a broken man Inquisitor. Audrey made the tower safe again without killing the mages and Cullen was sent away in hopes he would heal… however he was sent to Kirkwall, a place where Meredith’s views were more extreme than his own.” Leliana paused as a runner went by.

 

“Why are you telling me this? Are you trying to make me stop seeing him?” she asked with a hint of anger in her voice. She knew they had their differences, she knew that their views on mages were fundamentally different… that he was deep down a former Templar.

“No, but as your advisor you need to be aware. That despite all of what he’s endured, he embodied one quality the most, _to protect_ , at first, he sought to protect people from the use of dangerous magics… his fear caused him to be zealous about this but over time as Meredith’s fear over took the Kirkwall circle he began to protect the mages as well. He threw himself into the orders tenants, he began to question his orders, always he remained steadfast as he tried to protect both the people of Kirkwall from overzealous mages and the mages themselves from the zealotry of his brothers and sisters. And when Hawke drove things to a breaking point, he chose to stand with her, to _protect_ the mages.” Leliana spoke calmly, but there was a tone in her voice that implored understanding.

 

That’s when it clicked.

“You know I’m meeting with Hawke, I take it that she isn’t on good terms with our Commander?”

 

“Yes. And with the two of you greeting her last night, I feared she might bring this up to spite him. Cullen is a good man and this is the happiest any of us have ever seen him, I didn’t want Marian to colour your view of him, it has been said that the two have a long-standing rivalry which stems over her brother joining the Templars. The Champion is notoriously unpredictable, I can’t be sure what she will do and so I needed to inform you.” She sighed shifting slightly as an invisible weight lifted from the spymaster’s shoulders.

 

_She was looking out for her… for them._

“Thank you Leliana, I would have appreciated hearing this from Cullen himself but… given the circumstances I understand. It’s probably best I knew now, instead of later.”

“Any information can be dangerous, if used right. Both you and Cullen deserve better than what you’ve had and I hope that with each other you’ll find it.” Leliana bowed with a small smile.

 

One that Mira returned with a smart quip, “My dear Nightingale, I have no idea what you could possibly mean. The Commander and I are merely friends.” She smirked.

Leliana’s grin grew, “Of course, Inquisitor.” She chuckled as she took her leave.

 

 

Leliana was an odd bird one look and you didn’t know if she was going to kill you or praise you but deep down she was kind and she still cared even if she perceived that to be a weakness, it was a welcome one to Mira.

Mira quickly scoffed down her honey roll which had made her fingers sticky as she talked to Leliana before jogging across the courtyard to the stairs next to the Tavern. She made good time, only waving to the people in Skyhold as she passed not stopping to chat as she they had become accustomed to. She could see the dwarf in the distance standing in one of the inner lookouts with a bottle of wine and a tired expression.

 

 

“They told me they couldn’t wake you last night, did you finally decided to drink that rotten ale again?” Mira joked as she walked towards her shorter friend, he had been there since the beginning of this whole mess, helped her out with more things than she liked to admit, even helped her pen a letter back to her brother.

“I made a bet with Tiny after Krem gave me some shitty Intel. That big bastard drank both me and Sparkler under the table, so much for a cold making him a lightweight. He beat us, sniffles and all! Even said he felt better after all those drinks!” Varric grumbled with a half-smile as he leant forwards on the battlement.

 

“That’s what you get for betting against a Quinari! He’s a tricky bugger, damn strong to.” Mira chuckled offering the dwarf her apple.

“Nah you need it; someone tells me you spent your night with Curly.” Varric smirked, turning to look at his friend.

 

“Who told you that? You were passed out drunk until recently.” Mira frowned trying to hide her embarrassment she was getting from the smirking dwarf.

“I told him, you two seemed to be having fun and I didn’t think the Knight-Captain knew even how to smile, let alone have fun!” Hawke teased as she came down the stairs behind them. There was some hint of bite to her words, _just as Leliana predicted,_ but mostly she was welcoming.

 

“Ah, Inquisitor this is Hawke, Hawke this is Inquisitor Mira Trevelyan.” Varric made the introduction.

“Yes, we met last night while you were comatose, you lush.” Hawke chuckled, throwing Varric an amused expression.

“Hawke, haven’t seen you in months and here you are saying these hurtful things to me! Your oldest friend!” Varric gasped throwing the two women his best hurt expression as he clutched his hand to his heart.

“Oh, shush you, you know I love you.” Hawke laughed before moving to lean on the battlements.

 

 

“Soo, as happy as I am to have you here Hawke. Why are you here?” Mira smiled at the pair as she also leaned on the battlements, only she started to crunch on her apple. She’d had a big night after all!

“I asked Hawke to come because she might be able to help out with Corypheus. We did kinda accidently free him after all.” Varric shrugged and Hawke sighed.

 

“Wait what?” Mira coughed through her mouthful.

 

“Well, you know how Corypheus is somehow able to control the blight, you saw that in the messed up bad future yeah? Well it turns out he’s able to control the mind of blighted creatures to, He was being held in an abandoned Warden Prison way out in the Free Marches. Turns out the Wardens had him imprisoned for centuries using blood magic to bind him, my father was the last person to renew the seals holding him casting it in a way that would only break them by using someone of his blood. So naturally they came after me and my brother, we investigate, accidently set off a magical ward that trapped us in the prison with the only way out being to release the wards and kill the prisoner. Which we did! We killed him, no shadow of a doubt! Corypheus was dead on the floor, complete burning mess.” Hawke explained, trying to satisfy the shocked Inquisitor.

 

“I swear he was dead but then I got a letter from Varric a few weeks ago saying that the magister we killed had just destroyed Haven. I came as fast as I could.”

“Right so, Corypheus was held in a Warden Prison. You say you killed him but here he is attacking my Inquisition and Varric is certain they’re the same thing. Are you sure that this isn’t a mistake?” Mira checked with the two of them.

“I swear he was dead on the ground, there was no mistake but if Varric is certain. I trust him.”

 

“Well shit.” Mira sighed again, pressing her eyes with the palms of her hands to try and dispel the growing headache… _fuck me, Coryphy-shit. Can you just stay dead, please?_

 

“It’s not all bad news Inquisitor, I have a friend in the Wardens. He wrote to me not long after all this mess started, he said the Wardens have been acting strangely and that he’s now being hunted. We agreed to meet in an abandoned cave near Crestwood. I think you’ll want to hear what he has to say.” Hawke informed with a gentle hand to Mira’s arm.  There was a sympathy there that stemmed from understanding. _I suppose starting rebellions against tyrannical leaders was similar to this..._ “I’m going to ride ahead to make sure he’s alright, would you mind if I took Varric with me. We’ve got a bit of catching up to do.”

“Yeah that’s no problem, as long as you bring him back in one piece. The Inquisition would be lost without our story teller.” Mira sighed breaking a tired smile as she let the pair head off to get supplied for the trip.

                                                                                                                                                            

 

Mira frowned looking out over Skyhold. _What big bag of cats did you step in this time Mira?_ She thought as she absentmindedly watched the people go about their daily routines as she finished her breakfast. She could see Cassandra practicing like normal, so Varric was safe at least for the moment.

 

She took another bite of her apple before the anchor flared suddenly, surprising her as the electric shock spasmed her hand causing her to drop the last of her breakfast down the side of the battlement.

“ _Fuck_!” she swore, vigorously shaking her hand. She glared at the Anchor, _stupid mark_ , why did it flare up now? What did it want? _Probably to close some rifts… you’ve been sitting on your arse for too long Mira._

Absently, as she clutched her hand, Mira heard hurried footsteps behind her but she just dismissed it, she thought it was just one of the guards patrolling Skyhold.

 

“Hey! C’mere I know a bit of healing magic.” Hawke spoke quickly as she caught Mira’s hand in her own and enveloped them in a warm blue light, before she could even say a word.

“Hah, thanks… What’re you still doing here? I thought you went to get ready.” Mira gasped, breathing through the odd sensation as Hawkes magic soothed and cooled the inflamed mark.

 

“I wanted to talk to you, alone. I had some questions and I thought you might have some to.” Hawke smiled trying to sooth the other woman as she pulled the barrel with the empty bottle of wine sitting on it over for Mira to sit on.

"I uh yes, do you want to start, or shall I?” Mira asked lightly, as Hawke tried to sooth the rebelling mark.

“You start.” Hawke smirked, returning the Inquisitors hand as her cooling blue magic faded.

 

“So, where did you go after the Kirkwall exploded?”

“We got word that the Chantry was going to send another Exalted March to fight the Mage uprising and with me, so I fled in the attempt to force them divide their efforts. I took Anders with me, to keep him safe… and no he is nowhere near here.” Hawke explained, ending her speech with just the hint of a threat.

 

Mira held up her good hand non-threateningly, “He’ll find no enemy in me. I don’t exactly agree with his methods but something had to break. The Chantry as it functions, the abuse and vilification of mages, it needs to end.”

 

Hawke paused for a moment, a look of mild surprise crossed her face.

“That’s a surprising view, coming from the Herald of Andraste? Isn’t this Inquisition meant to be all Chantry and Religion?”

“Ehh, I had issues with the Chantry long before I got this stupid thing. And no, the Inquisition isn’t all ‘Chantry and Religion’ It’s about helping people who need it and stopping a mad magister from destroying the world we live in… but if I might ask? Are you two alright?”

 

“I uh, Yeah, we are, thanks. Anders is… calmer now that we’re just living a quiet life on our own, not doing anyone no harm. You have to understand the less people who know about us, the safer we are.” Hawke sighed, there was a rare seriousness to her expression… one Mira knew all too well.

“Of course; I know what it’s like to be hunted. But if you ever need help, I know a few people outside of the Inquisition who would be willing. I owe Isabella a debt and if you’re a friend of hers then you only need ask.”

 

“Thanks… So, if we’re talking boys, you and the Knight Captain huh? How does that work with all the Mages here? Varric said he’d changed but just how much?” Hawke asked with a raised brow, she was holding something back it was clear.

“He was bit uneasy at first but he’s getting along with them, he even suggested that the mages come join the recruits more often to help ease the tensions that had formed between them and our Templars. I understand that there are old prejudices but he’s trying to get them to work together and help foster more understanding and friendship between the two parties and I admire that.” Mira nodded firmly, feeling a sense of pride wash over her for her Commander.

 

“So pretty far from the whole, ‘Mages aren’t people’ days then?” she questioned with a raised eyebrow.

Mira chuckled at that, “It’s not like we don’t argue about it, in fact I think I punched him in the face when we decided to go to the Mages for help closing the breach rather than the Templars. But even still after that, he’s trying to make this better, to protect both the mages and everyone else.”

“You punched him to? I remember when I punched him, I think I left him with a scar…He’s got a very punch-able face.” Hawke laughed, “So you say he’s changed. My brother said he wasn’t actually as cold as he seemed but he said it was rare for the man to joke or mess about with the other Templars in his off-duty hours. But there were some whispers of him getting drunk one night with a bunch of older Templars apparently he’s quite charming when he wants to be.” She finished with a wink.

 

“Mmm, he’s very charming when he wants to be. Well when you get passed the blushing and stuttering. Very charming.” Mira laughed with Hawke, throwing her head back as the conversation took a delightful turn.

 

“Ha! I remember the first time I met him, he was investigating some missing recruits but he couldn’t get the workers at the brothel to talk to him. Well more like he couldn’t talk to them, he even blushed just mentioning the word brothel! It was so adorable in a scary Templar kinda way.” Hawke continued, their laughter was now causing the guards on rotation to stare at them.

“Oh, when we get back I have to get you a drink.” Mira giggled moving to stand now that her hand was under control.

“I’ll get Varric to set up a game of cards. Now I better go find my Dwarf before he goes and gets himself into trouble.” Hawke smiled, bowing slightly before heading off again seemingly more satisfied than before.

 

**

Crestwood… wasn’t somewhere she’d been before. Maybe she should ask Scout Harding about it, or maybe Cullen? He’s Ferelden, he might know! With that, Mira decided to go drop in on her Commander, this was work related. He had information and she needed to tell him about her next trip, completely Inquisition work related! But if there happened to be kissing… Well she was only receiving her Commanders complements, right?

She walked along the battlements, occasionally prodding at the mark on her hand. It was flaring up more viciously in recent days, maybe because she hadn’t closed a rift in a while? Or maybe because she wasn’t eating regularly? She should ask Solas later, he was clever. She walked through the two towers leading to Cullen’s office listening half-heartedly to the conversations she passed.

 

“…I just looked down and my Dagger was gone!”

“Did you see that Cat near the kitchens?”

“Who left plums on the windowsill?”

She smiled softly to herself, Cole’s doing most likely. That kid had a knack for causing odd kinds of trouble but it always seemed to pan out for the best so she let him continue. And she was curious about the Cat, Mira was rather fond of cats although she had to admit she was more of a dog person. Big slobbering Mabari’s that came bounding up to her, oh she doted on them alright.

 

“… Tell Cassandra that I’m fine, she doesn’t need to keep checking up on me every few hours. It’s a headache I’ll survive.” Mira could hear Cullen’s voice drift through the half open door.

 

She knocked, feeling polite enough not to just barge in when she was greeted with a short. “Enter.” She smiled softly to herself.

“Ah Mi- Inquisitor it’s good to see you.” Cullen smiled, fumbling slightly when he realised the messenger was still in the room.

“You’re dismissed, close the door on your way out.” He ordered to the messenger with a gentle smile which caused the young Dwarven lady to quickly jump to his request.

 

“So, Hawke was right, you can be charming.” Mira chuckled as she came to sit on his desk next to him.

“Urgh, you talked to Hawke about me?” Cullen groaned, leaning his head into his hands.

“Yep, she was surprised to see you smiling. I told her you were spectacular Commander, with a magnificent cock, and a mouth that would make chantry girls weep if they knew what it could do.” Mira smiled, watching the blush steadily rise on her Commander face.

 

“Mira! You didn’t!” Cullen gasped before wincing slightly in pain from an obvious headache. Mira took pity drawing his head forward to rub at his temples with her fingers

 

“No, I didn’t, I told her about what you’re doing to improve relations between the Mages and recruits and Templars. I told her of how you are making the effort to help the mages settle in here and help combat the tensions between the Templars and Mages. She was impressed.” She soothed, rubbing gentle circles with her fingers, enjoying the way he sighed from her ministrations.

“I’m glad to hear you hold me in such high esteem.” Cullen sighed, a small smiling pulling at his lips as he leaned into her hands. Distantly, he heard a pop and then all he could smell was elfroot and spindleweed and feel a cool tingling sensation on his temples. He froze wondering what she was doing but was soothed again by her laugh.

 

“Don’t worry, it’s the tincture I gave you. It’ll help the headache. Relax.” Mira spoke quietly, her fingers doing wonders on Cullen’s head. He mumbled his thanks and began to relax again. The pair stayed like that for a while before Mira thought she’d make a joke.

 

“So, which of these demonic papers do I need to talk to for giving you a headache?” she chuckled noting the many on his desk and the couple that she might have been sitting on. Cullen chuckled gently at the joke before sighing again, maker he was doing a lot of sighing today! He leaned back out of her fingers and gently took them in his hand.

 

“Mira. There is something I must tell you.” Cullen sighed heavily, running his fingers over her hands as he spoke.

“You make it sound so ominous,” Mira joked before she thought about what he said, “… Did you not like last night?” she asked thinking the worst, maybe she pushed him too far, maybe they should have just stayed friends. Was it her drinking? It was probably her drinking.

 

“What? No! Last night, last night was amazing I don’t regret a second of it.” Cullen assured holding her hands just a little bit tighter as if he was afraid she’d disappear. Mira relaxed a little, taking a quick breath to steady herself and let go of her nagging thoughts.

“Oh, that’s good, great even. I rather enjoyed myself to, we should maybe do that again sometime. But enough of my talk, you were telling me something before I interrupted.” Mira smiled, pressing a soft kiss to his hand to make him smile.

 

“Did you know that Templar abilities are heightened due to the Lyrium they take? After you take your vigil you’re given your first draught of Lyrium and the power it contains but the Chantry also uses it to control us. Keep us leashed to the order and the Chantries bidding. After what happened in Kirkwall I just couldn’t. I am no longer taking Lyrium Mira; I refuse to be some Chantry dog on a leash.” Cullen revealed looking slightly nervous yet oddly relieved that he told her.

“Dog on a leash? You said that the other night to.” She mentioned idly, her hands fiddling with each other, he was about to reply but she beat him to it.

“Thank you for telling me Cullen and I’ll help however I can but you must promise me one thing.” Mira asked, taking his jaw into her hand so she knew she had his complete attention.

 

“Anything.” He nodded seriously, his own hand coming up to cup hers.

 

“If you’re ever in pain and it becomes too much you’ll either go find a healer or come see me. I don’t want you suffering when someone could help, understand?” Mira asked for clarification because she’d seen Lyrium withdrawal before on the streets in Rivain. Old addicts begging for ‘Dwarf Dust’ in the alleys late at night.

“I’ll try. I’ve asked Cassandra to watch me and evaluate my condition, as a seeker she can evaluate the dangers and take over if I become unable to fulfil my duties to the Inquisition.” Cullen nodded ending on a serious note. Something that he was ever so good at.

“Alright, as long you know we’re here to help and we care. Now Hawke had a lead for me in Crestwood, she wants me to meet her Warden contact so I’ll be traveling as soon as this afternoons meeting is finished. So, with my limited time left in Skyhold, do you want to get some lunch with me _Commander_?” Mira asked, a clear offer hidden in her teasing tone.

“My lady I would be honoured.” Cullen smiled as he stood from his chair, leading Mira to the door.

 

**

 

The pair walked together through the keep easily keeping the conversation light and professional as so not to attract unwelcome comments or ideas from the public. There were after all many visiting dignitaries wandering around within their walls. As they came to the stairs to the kitchen the conversation opened up a bit as there were less eyes and ears around this side of the castle to hear them.

 

“So, I hear you were actually quiet the charmer back in Kirkwall.” Mira smiled looking to tease her friend.

“What? Where on earth did you hear that?” Cullen scoffed and continued walking.

 

“Hawke was telling me all about the stories her brother used to tell of you.” Mira giggled, waving her hands a bit to emphasise her point.

“Well Carver over exaggerates, I was probably about as far from charming as you could get!” Cullen chuckled slightly in a self-deprecating manner.

“Oh, I’m sure you managed to charm some ladies, where else did you learn that wonderful thing you do with your mouth.” Mira smirked, coming in close to whisper the last part just for his ears. Cullen flushed, instantly turning as red as his cloak and Mira loved every second of it!

 

“Well maybe one or two young ladies, a very long time ago, but well… none were as lovely as you.” Cullen muttered back, his eyes darkening with desire at just how lovely he thought her to be.

 

“Well Commander,” she smiled drawing out his name. “You keep talking like that and you’re going to make me swoon.” Mira laughed, clutching her chest dramatically as she draped the other hand over her forehead.

“Then apparently, I’m not as bad at talking to beautiful women as I thought.” Cullen laughed along with Mira, enjoying the way she could joke so easily and bring smiles to people’s faces.

“I don’t know, she also told me about your investigation at the brothel.” She smiled again clearly teasing him.

 

“To be fair, I think they were just as afraid of me as I was of them. Well, they at least they feared my uniform, maybe not so much by the boy under it.” He shrugged opening the kitchen door for his lady as she laughed at him.

The pair tried to keep out of the way as the Head Cook greeted them with a polite smile, before turning to shout orders at the other cooks

 

“Ah! Inquisitor, Commander I wasn’t expecting your presence. Is everything alright? Your meals to your liking?” The head cook asked looking worried.

“Everything is fine Amrita. The food as usual is excellent, we were just hoping to quickly grab an early lunch before I head out later. Have you by any chance made any of those tiny cake I love?” Mira smiled, greeting the older Riviani cook with a quick and friendly kiss to the cheek, to which the elderly lady flushed with joy.

“I have indeed your worship and I’ve also sent word to a baker in Val Royeaux who’s agreed to exchange recipes, you should have some new cakes to try by the time you get back.” Amrita smiled warmly, which caused the other chefs in the kitchen to relax slightly. The girl who delivered their meal last night was quietly gathering two plates of the best of the lunch menu for the intruding pair.

 

“Amrita you really do spoil me, this Inquisition would surely starve without you and your chefs. You really are the lifeblood of Skyhold and I hope you know how much we appreciate you.” Mira gave another devastatingly beautiful smiles to the workers in the room, a smile that would have made Cullen’s heart stop dead in his tracks had it been aimed at him. The mood in the kitchen seemed to swell as the Inquisitor praised them as they all paused to smile proudly to the Inquisitor before continuing to bustle around the busy kitchen.

 “My lady Inquisitor, Commander. I took the liberty of preparing an early lunch for you.” The same woman who made their meal last night smiled, present the two with plates filled with delicious looking food. _And a few tiny cakes._

“Thank you, Gabriella? Wasn’t it? And also thank you for dinner last night, it was amazing.” Cullen smiled taking the offered plate.

“The best roast I’ve eaten.” Mira agreed as both Gabriella and Amrita blushed at the compliment.

 

The pair left the happy Kitchen staff taking their plates through the keep up into Mira’s quarters, quietly dodging Josephine and only sparing a polite nod to the guards by Mira’s door.

“How did you do that back there?” Cullen asked as he pulled a small table closer to the couches.

“Do what?” Mira asked back, halfway through taking a bite from one of those tiny cakes.

“Inspire all those people?” Cullen continued like it was the most obvious thing in the world but Mira scoffed at him none the less.

 

“Cullen I’m not inspiring to anyone.” Mira snorted inelegantly, “I was just talking to the chefs and speaking my mind! Although I think that’s something Josie wants me to do less of in front of her important visitors.” She finished with a chuckle, slipping off her boots so she could curl up in the corner of the couch as she ate.

“Well I think you’re an inspiration and I frankly admire how you speak your mind.” Cullen admitted before taking a bite of his sandwich. It was true though, he admired Mira a great deal

 

Cullen didn’t notice the effect his words had on Mira but when he spoke, she had stopped halfway through raising a piece of beef to her mouth to gawk at him, mouth hanging open and everything.  She smiled to herself before quietly finishing her meal, he thought this highly of her? The woman who the first thing she had done when she was no longer a prisoner was get blind drunk, _Again!_

“Cullen? We have some time before the meeting and I am going to be gone for a few weeks. Sooo, fancy making use of my bed again?” Mira asked with a sly smile. Cullen looked up from his own empty plate, blushing slightly at her suggestion. _Maker how much did this man blush_ , she was going to have to do some experiments there, there might be some coin to be made with Varric on this!

 

“Yes! I mean if you uh want to?” Cullen stumbled over his words, hand rubbing the back of his neck again. Mira smiled, putting the plates on the table as she crept closer.

“Yes, I want to. I want to do it on the bed, this couch, my desk, on the balco-mrfft-!” Mira listed casually teasing the man before he pounced! Lips crashing against hers as he pulled her into his lap.

Laughter pouring out of the two as Cullen used his strength to lift Mira’s smaller body into his arms and take her to bed, both of them losing their clothes in the process before they tumbled into a well-deserved afternoon break.

**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So that ended up like 3000 words more than the original draft but I added a whole sexy bit at the start for you guys.  
> We should go back to our regularly scheduled uploads but I am back at uni with a shit-tonne of workload, be gentle with me!


	17. Grey Rain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Our return to plot, with the addition of a freindly face.

 

Chapter 17 – Grey Rain.

 

“Hey! It is literally raining undead and rifts, I am soaked through and she’s standing there with the most frustrating smile plastered to her face!” Dorian griped as the team tromped through yet another group of undead, now with the added benefit that was the smell of burning flesh! Mira was ahead of the group chattering to yet another bloody backwater southerner.

 

“Oh, come off it Dorian, your only angry cause you’re wet. Boss is happy, leave her be.” Bull sighed looking to sooth the irritated Vint.

“Look at her Bull, she is unnaturally happy. Either she’s gotten into the blood lotus again or she’s finally perfect her wine making, either way that means she’s not sharing and that is reason enough to be angry.” Dorian continued as the pair of them watched the Inquisitor wander off to speak to yet another villager trying to figure out a way to close the rift in the lake.

Bull and Dorian were so deep in their argument that neither of them had noticed the quiet Grey Warden who walked up behind them.

 

“Look at her face. Do you see how happy she is? We’re in the middle of a pissing shitstorm and she is happy, that is not normal, even for her! She hates the rain!”

“Maybe she’s excited to meet another Warden? She was excited to meet you right?” Bull continued refusing to try and (forgive the pun) _Rain on the Inquisitors parade._

 

“I think she was hungover when she found me, plus I shouted at her.” Blackwall griped, Nudging Bull when he noticed the Inquisitor chatting with one of the village children, she was handing him a small piece of chocolate after she consulted the mother.

“Look at her, she’s even handing out chocolate to children! What’s next dreary love songs and flowers in our hair?” Dorian was getting dangerously close here to raising his voice, so much so that Bull gave him a look to quieten down before the Inquisitor noticed.

 

“Well maybe she’s banging someone? That’ll put anyone in a good mood!” Bull sighed giving into the other two’s suspicious talk. Startling them both in to silence as the Inquisitor came back to them.

 

“What you guys talking about?” Mira asked as she took a piece of chocolate for herself before her block around, Dorian practically leapt at the opportunity.

“Just the weather boss, we gonna go find that warden now?” Bull asked refusing the chocolate with a wave of his hand. Blackwall surprisingly went in for a piece.

“Yep. The little one said there are a bunch of caves just passed the village, said he used to play there before the trouble started and the bandits moved in. Nice polite kid.” Mira smiled keeping her lips closed as she finished off her treat.

“Got a soft spot for the little ones huh?” Blackwall asked to make conversation as they went to collect the horses they left at the town gates.

 

“Oh, Maker no, the kid gave me directions and besides it is a bit gloomy around here he deserved a treat. There was this one kid in the village where we settled, he used to scream the place down! To be fair he was still a babe at the time and his mother hated us, I swear she used to coax that child into screaming every time we walked by just to annoy us. Finn even offered to take a look at the boy to see if there was anything wrong with it!” Mira laughed as she jumped into the saddle of her horse.

“You know, that’s the first time I’ve heard you say his name.” Dorian pointed out, letting his horse follow on to the Inquisitors as they left the village.

 

“Surely I’ve mentioned his name before; it was so silly! Florian Phineas Horatio Aldebrant, Esquire. Can’t forget the Esquire,” Mira laughed, “His mother would be so cross. Not that I ever met her.”

 

“That is quite a mouthful no wonder he shortened it.” Blackwall agreed catching up to the conversation.

“The other mages kept calling him Flora. He was sweet and together we were safe for a time. Seems so long ago now, isn’t it amazing how the end of the world does that to things!” Mira smiled but Bull noticed, he always did, the small shake to her hand as she spoke. It hurt her to speak of him but not enough for her to stop, she needed this, friends to talk to and he understood.

 

The four of them road down the old market road the conversation fading as they started to charge through the rain, kicking a few bandits in the face as they attacked

“Hey boss, is that Hawke up ahead?” Bull asked, pointing to one of the hills up ahead. There was defiantly a mage using magic to climb her way up the hill. It looked useful and Bull really needed to ask Dalish to see if that could be helpful to the chargers.

“Oh yeah, hey look there’s Varric!” Mira pointed, spurring her horse to get to her friends faster. Bull watched her and felt a quiet pang of worry

**

 

“Inquisitor, glad you made it!” Hawke called out from the entrance to the cave with a very wet Varric.

“I hope you two didn’t have to much trouble getting here, but judging by Varric slightly wet expression I’d say you did.” Mira grinned and well her grin was infectious, so Varric seemed to cheer up even if only slightly.

 

“A Bear knocked me into a puddle, a very deep puddle. Practically a lake!” Varric explained wringing out his coat as Hawke used her magic to dry him, which according to the look on Dorian’s face he hadn’t thought to try that.

“Yeah, I know, I fought the bear while you were drowning! Anyway, the warden should be inside, we only just arrived.” Hawke sighed, clearly a little drained from fighting a bear single handily.

 

Mira nodded and gestured for the others to follow. Dorian lit a torch hanging on the wall and used it to guide the group deeper into the passageway. It was quiet but there was shuffling coming from up ahead along with a soft light from a fire. A nug ran across Mira’s feet startling her into almost obliterating the small creature, that’s when she noticed the signs. Blood, sword marks scratched into the walls, scuffed foot prints. There was a fight here and judging from the blind bandit logo someone was fighting bandits.

 

Mira moved first and entered the room hidden at the back of the tunnel. It appeared empty, signs of former occupants but not of any current ones, Mira kept a hand near her dagger just in case. There was a quiet scrape of a sword leaving its sheath and then the unpleasant sensation of a having a sword pointed at you. However, that unpleasant sensation lessened slightly when she saw her foes armour, a Grey Warden and a handsome one at that.

 

“Hey, hey. It’s just us, I brought the Inquisitor.” Hawke called out, jogging forward when she saw the scene. The warden faltered slight at her words, taking in the scene around him before noticing Blackwall.

“Wait… you have a Grey Warden with you?” the man asked, raising his sword again in preparation to defend himself.

 

“Warden Blackwall.”

“You’re Blackwall? Uh my mentor Duncan he spoke of you.” The man greeted all be it slightly surprised at another Wardens presence.

“Duncan… of course, good man.” Blackwall praised in his usual short manner.

 

 

“I’m Alistair, it’s an honour to meet all of you. Although I wish it were some place nicer.” He greeted pleasantly, sheathing his sword when he realised his intruders weren’t a threat.

 

“I’m sorry, you’re _The_ Alistair? Who fought the Archdemon with the Hero of Ferelden?” Mira questioned clearly surprised by her company and for that matter Hawkes Company, how exactly did she know him?!

“Maker, I need to change my name. Yes, that was me, War, Betrayal, Darkspawn all lots of fun, and made for excellent stories I’m sure.  But no one cares about that anymore, I answer to Warden Commander Clarel now. Just like everyone else.” Alistair sighed, there was a glimpse of humour underneath it all but at the moment all Mira saw was a very tired man.

 

“May I suggest Blondie? As a new name of course.” Mira chuckled trying to lighten the gloomy mood in an already gloomy cave. Alistair brightened slightly upon realising her joke.

“Blondie's already taken. What about Freckles?” Varric joined in much to Hawke's exasperated sigh.

“I’ll have to think about it.” Alistair chuckled softly before moving deeper into the cave, seemingly distracted.

 

“Good. So most of you Wardens disappear, then I run into a Darkspawn magister called Corypheus. Do you think that maybe one might have something to do with the other?” Mira questioned, her eye’s glinting slightly as she sized up her opponent and thought on the best way to get information out of him. Something she had learned from watching her advisers.

 

“When Hawke killed Corypheus the Wardens thought the matter resolved. But Archdemon don’t die from simple injury and I feared that Corypheus might possess the same power. So I started to investigate.” Alistair sighed before turning to look at the table behind him. His posture sagging slightly betraying his weariness.

“I found hints but no proof. And then, not long after, every Warden in Orlais began to hear the Calling.” Alistair confessed, the weight of his words made the revelation heavy and pointed. Like a sharp axe slowly sinking through your body as the mind worked to comprehend its magnitude.

 

“Makers breath man, I recall that being a bad thing. But I _Don’t_ recall you telling me about all this!” Hawke growled and Alistair sighed.

“It was a secret. A very dangerous one. I try to actually keep a few of my oaths to the Wardens. Just a few.”

 

“Remind me again, the Calling?” Mira questioned looking between both Alistair and Blackwall.

 

“Wardens are tied to the Darkspawn, we’re connected somehow and eventually that connection poisons you. You get bad dreams, and then you start to hear the music. It calls to you. Quiet at first… and then so loud you can’t bear it. At that point, you say farewell and go into the Deep Roads to die fighting, ‘In Death, Sacrifice.’ And all that.” Alistair answered, his voice distant, distracted. Mira suddenly realised he was probably hearing it, the Calling.

 

“So every Grey Warden in Orlais is hearing this. They think they’re dying?!” Hawke summarised with just a hint of anger.

“Yes, I think Corypheus caused this somehow. If all the Wardens die, who will stop the next Blight? That’s what has them so terrified.” Alistair continued. Mira was still watching quietly, taking in the conversation and also how his hands were shaking.

 

“And then they do something desperate! Which is, of course, what Corypheus wants.” Hawke sighed, running a hand through her short hair.

 

“So, the Wardens think they’re dying and have stopped thinking clearly, that’s not going to go well. This Calling, do you think it’s real or could Corypheus be mimicking it somehow?” Mira asked, this wasn’t pleasant news. If Corypheus had the warden… well her job just got a lot harder.

“I have no idea, before all this I’d barely heard of Corypheus. I didn’t even know he was supposed to be a magister until I started digging around! Right now, all that matters, is that the Wardens are acting like they’re going to die.” Alistair finished with almost a growl in his voice, imploring the Inquisitor to see the threat, to listen to him.

 

“Hang on you said that all the Wardens are hearing the Calling. Does that mean you?” Mira asked, still watching him twitch.

“Unfortunately, yes. When I’m talking or fighting, I can almost ignore it. But whenever things are quiet, I can hear it. It’s like a song you can’t get out of your head… Damned annoying frankly!” Alistair admitted. Mira was starting to warm to the man, he didn’t hold back. Honest and humorous, qualities she appreciated.

“So the Wardens are making some last, desperate attack on the Darkspawn?” Mira sighed, it was a hopeless endeavour that would end up with more harm done than prevented. But Alistair frowned at her words.

 

“I saw what a Blight did to Ferelden. If Wardens hadn’t stopped it there’d be no more Thedas!” Alistair exclaimed now pacing the room as he tried to keep himself in check.

 

“Warden-Commander Clarel proposed some drastic things. Blood magic and such, to prevent further Blights before we die… I protested, maybe too loudly, and Clarel sent guards, and … Well, here I am.” He sighed as if admitting his precarious position before pointing at a marked point on his map. “Wardens were gathering here, in the Western Approach. It’s an old Tevinter Ritual tower. I’m going to investigate. I could use some help.” Alistair finished and started walking towards the tunnel.

Mira glanced over towards Hawke and Varric who were both looking towards her for guidance. She wanted to head to the tower with Alistair, this Warden threat needed their attention. However, there was still the matter of the trouble in the lake.

 

“Alistair, hold a moment.” Mira called out, breaking into a light jog to follow after the Warden who turned around at the sound of his name. “It doesn’t make sense for you to head to the tower on your own, so we’ll go together. Thing is, there’s a rift in the middle of a lake that needs my attention. If you’re willing, you could help us out on this and then we can head to the Western Approach in a more defensible number in case of resistance from Wardens or Venatori.”

 

Alistair paused, thinking over the request. The prospect of a decent fight and company seemed a good idea to Alistair. And well he had to admit, the Inquisitor was rather easy on the eyes. Even ones as Jaded as his own.

“Alright Inquisitor you have yourself a deal.” Alistair accepted the offer with a small grin which seemed to be mirrored on the Inquisitors face.

“Please, call me Mira.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright kids, so this is a shorter chapter and i'm in a good mood. I'm just wrapping up the next chapter, giving it a nice little clean up and i'll post it up today for you guys.


	18. The Western Approach

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Our gang travels to the Western Approach, and along the way Mira and Alistair start to get to know each other.

Chapter 18 - Western Approach.

 

 

The bandits in the fort were a piece of cake, all the way and right until they got to their leader who in one swing of his gigantic hammer managed to knock out Dorian, Blackwall and Varric (Mainly because Blackwall’s shield came off in the attack and smacked Varric in the head.) Leaving Mira, Alistair, Hawke and Iron Bull to fight the giant of a man.

The fight wore the man down after a while but he was good, getting in a dangerously close hit to the Inquisitor who had to use her hook chain on one of Bull’s horns to pull herself out of harm’s way. But after the battle was over and the Inquisitions flag firmly planted the group only had the briefest of moments to relax before they went and tackled the rift in the lake.

 

It eventually took two days for the whole mess in Crestwood to be resolved and then with the added benefit of a cross Inquisitor upon the reveal of the Mayors treachery before they were on the road again. Mira’s previously happy mood being diminished slightly after all that shit. But hey at least it had stopped raining, now that they were away from Crestwood.

 

The group decided to make camp just off the main road, a small clearing in the treeline that seemed to be favoured as a rest spot. Bull went about preparing dinner having been able to barter some spices from some merchants on the road and Varric had managed to shoot down a fat Ram before it even had the idea to run. Dinner seemed to be turning into a quiet affair, no one seeming to be up for much conversation as the day’s ride had drained them that was until Mira pulled out a flask of wine.

 

“Inquisitor, did I mention that you are a wonderful and generous person?” Alistair smiled, thrusting his cup forwards in hope she would fill it.

“Alistair do you think that’s a smart idea?” Hawke warned throwing the warden a look.

 

“Nope, but then when do I have smart ideas?” Alistair laughed, thanking the inquisitor with a smile before he started to drink.

“Oh, now I recognise you! You were in Kirkwall, the Hanged man. Maker man you shaped up.” Varric chuckled finally recognising him after a whole week of being in close proximity.

 

“You were in Kirkwall? Were you an associate of Hawkes then?” Mira asked still trying to figure out how they knew each other. The stories of from the Blight say that he left or was Exiled from Ferelden… she didn’t really remember.

 

“Ah more like occasional passer-by. We would occasionally drink at the same pub; well I say drink. I would probably be at the point of sprouting nonsense whenever Hawke came through. If the Warden Commander hadn’t sent people to come find me, I’d probably still be in a pub.” Alistair laughed pouring himself another bowl of soup.

“I guess it’s true about what they say then? About a Warden’s appetite?” Mira chuckled passing back the flask so he could get another swig.

“Oh, you don’t know the half of it.” Alistair smiled slyly, giving Mira a flirtatious look. One that made her blush at the unexpected come on.

 

“Hawke knows all about that, Blondie still being good to you?” Varric asked shifting the conversation away from the flirting pair.

“More than you will ever know about. He is better now and well, so is the sex.” Hawke admitted shamelessly, she was proud of her Warden lover and how he had grown. She was also grateful that Justice had quietened down after the Chantry fuck up.

 

 

Mira continued to watch Alistair, her mind wandering to all the things she could do with a Warden’s stamina. It would be glorious, she’d heard things about a Warden’s stamina that made her toes curl… and well he was very easy on the eyes. Strong, broad shoulders, stubble that would leave the most delicious burn across her thighs…. Blond curly hair…... Shit.

Mira turned from her observations, suddenly feeling a roll of guilt flood through her system, guilt that had the spectacular vision of Cullen. What was she even doing with him? Did she even know what they were doing? Was it a permanent thing? Was it just a fling? Did he think it was just a fling? Oh, Andraste’s blood.

 

“I’m gonna go to bed, get an early start and all that. Night.” Mira murmured as he hurriedly stood and retreated to her tent. Leaving an empty bowl of stew and half a cup of wine next to the fire.

The rest of the group looked at each other slightly confused by the Inquisitors action Varric picked up the half empty cup from the ground and showed it to the rest of them.

 

“Anyone else think Tiger’s acting really strange?” He asked quietly getting an exaggerated nod from Dorian, a quiet grunt from Blackwall and a grumbled reminder to find a better nickname from Bull.

“Alright Freckles you’re sharing a tent with her, go see what’s going on.” Varric sighed sending the new Warden off with gesture. This new Grey Warden was currently slurping down the last of his stew before realising he was being asked something.

 

“Sorry what?”

 

“Boss has been acting weird lately and she seems to find you attractive. Go figure out what’s bothering her.” Bull sighed, repeating the instruction to the Warden. He was all fine letting the boss continue on whatever happy streak she was on but now she seemed upset and well, He wanted to help.

 

“Me attractive?! You must be mistaken.” Alistair laughed, keeping his voice low so that the Inquisitor wouldn’t hear the conversation.

“Just go, you’re sharing the same tent anyway and if you find out something important I’ll pay for the next round.” Hawke sighed pointing a sharp finger at the almost blushing Warden.

 

Alistair sighed, he felt like a child being sent to bed… more like being sent to the kennels. But he did as they requested and headed off to his tent with the flask of wine in hand, Bull gave him a gentle pat on the shoulder as he passed almost as if he was psyching him up for battle. It was only Mira, right? He made his way across the camp to their tent, a soft light still coming from within as shadows danced about on the canvas as she prepared her sleeping roll.

 

“Hey Mira, it’s me. Is it safe to come in?” he called out as he watched the perimeter of the camp. Old habits die hard. There was a mumbled ‘yes’ from within and the sound of armour being shucked off.

He entered as bid to find Mira in her undershirt and trousers, sitting on her bedroll as she plucked at the laces of her boots. He gave a warm smile in greeting before he went through the same motions, at least the Inquisition camps were a lot safer than the ones they used during the Blight, no threat of Shrieks here. Only Bandits and demons, at least they were slightly smarter than Darkspawn.

 

“So… I hear you spent time in Rivain. I spent some time working there after... Nice place, if a bit hot.” Alistair tried to make conversation, stumbling right onto a sore subject within seconds of opening his big mouth.

 

“I suppose it is for a Ferelden. Ever hear the song about the Lioness?” Mira smiled, feeling proud of her past achievements.

“Actually, I did! It’s a really popular one. _Hear the Lioness roar while her foes bow and cower._ Catchy.” He grinned, watching Mira relax slightly.

“Do you know the story behind it?” she asked, a curious glint in her eyes.

“I confess I don’t. When you’re selling yourself as a Mercenary it didn’t leave much time anything but fighting and well drinking.”

 

“I stopped a gang war between a couple of Mercenary companies in Llomerryn by shouting their leaders into submission.” Mira laughed as she watched the expression on Alistair’s face widen in surprise.

“The songs about you? You’re the Lioness? I thought you were a noble!” He gasped, turning his head from where he was laying out his own roll.

 

“Ha, I’m about as far from nobility as you could get. Just because I was born into it didn’t mean I wanted it.” She sighed plumping up her pillow.

“I get that, being a bastard and all.  People always telling you what to do, where to go and how to act. _Don’t make any claims for the throne Alistair, oh wait we need please sort out all of Ferelden Alistair!_ ” He shrugged making a grim face at the thought. It had been 10 years since he left Ferelden… left her and he still couldn’t help but think of her every so often.

“You’re the bastard prince! I remember someone saying there was a claim for Ferelden’s throne in the Landsmeet when I first got here. So, that was you.” Mira asked, and it was her turn to look surprised.

 

“Yeah. It started as a way to get rid of Loghain, the man who turned from Ostagar, but it went sideways. We won the Landsmeet with enough support… but when Audrey fought Loghain, she spared his life. Rodiran, a Grey warden from Orlais wanted to make him one of us… He wanted to make the man who butchered my brothers and sisters and thousands of others at Ostagar a Grey Warden and Audrey agreed.”

“But ah, I was young and foolish and well, really angry at her choice. I may have not handled the situation as well as I could have… in the end I got myself exiled and lost the love of my life.” Alistair sighed, he really was a stupid man and he deserved everything that had happened to him since his banishment.

 

“Alistair… We need a drink. Something better than this pish!” Mira decided rather suddenly as she quickly tore into her pack for a beautifully adorned flask. Shining silver, wrapped in brown leather that was stamped with the head or a roaring lion.

 

“Here, You first.” She offered throwing her pillow next to him as she came over to sit on his roll. She got comfortable next to him as he took the flask, listening to the slight hiss as he opened it and took a swig. It burned like mage fire going down his throat, making his eyes water and his chest clench as he coughed and spluttered once he finished.

“Wha- What the hell is that!” he shouted, throat still burning. His head rolling with the sudden shot to his system. He watched as Mira took her own swig, having a similar reaction although she handled it slightly better.

 

“Dunno, I won it in a card game, the guy said it was considered poisonous in 3 countries. Including Antiva!” she laughed through her coughing, handing it back to him for another swig. One he took after bracing himself first. He gasped only slightly this time after his pass, feeling the steady burn to his system as his mind swam pleasantly.

“You know we’re quite the pair, Bastard prince and runaway noble both turned to mercenaries to get by, both betrayed by people that were supposed to love them… watched people die because of them. Fuck.” She mumbled turning to lean into his chest as she slowly lost higher motor function. Maker this stuff was strong!

 

“Both got short life expectancies, although I think mine is shorter.” He slurred, noticing somewhat intriguingly that the Calling was quieter with the incessant buzzing in his head.

“Oh, I don’t know! I think my hand is trying to kill me.” She shot back, swinging her marked hand in front of his face. He frowned slightly, looking at the glowing green brand and her really pretty fingers.

 

“You know – it’s real pretty. Like the fade… but prettier.” Alistair mumbled catching her failing hand in his own to bring it closer to his face. He wondered, a small insistence voice in the back of his head, what it would be like to kiss it? Would it taste like the fade? Would it taste like her? What did she taste like?

Without another thought he pulled the hand closer to his mouth and pressed his lips to it. It was sloppy and uncoordinated but the mark tingled pleasantly against his lips kind of like electricity but softer, more pleasant and he wanted to know more. His tongue flicked out even before his mind could hope to process the action and the taste hit him. Leather, sweat and sea salt, like the taste of an ocean breeze.

 

Mira whimpered softly at the sensation, nobody had done that before. Nobody, not even herself had thought to treat the anchor with such tender and sensual attention. It felt good, _so good,_ like he was soothing a hurt she’d forgotten was hurting.

 

“Alistair… I – mmrff-” she mumbled as she slowly sank into his chest as they both sank down onto the bed roll. The alcohol taking over, making their limbs feel heavy as if they were full of sand against a receding shoreline.

 

Mira fell asleep first, a dead weight against Alistair’s side, shamelessly using his chest as a pillow as she snored softly. He remembered it had been years since he had slept with a woman like this, together in a tent both so tired and exhausted that they couldn’t hope to move apart. He sighed gently and he found that deep down, he missed this. The warmth of a woman’s touch, the feel of her taut but firm muscles under his hands. And the gentle lull of her breath as he quickly slipped into a drunken sleeps embrace.

 

**

After a rather awkward wake up when Varric barged in to find both the Warden and Inquisitor both tangled together and snoring loudly and sleeping so deeply that Dorian had to come along and use his magic to shock the pair awake.

When the pair finally got up and out of their tent, Mira was confused to find Varric acting a bit down while they had breakfast but he quickly bounced back after Hawke whispered something in his ear.

 

 

The ride to the Western Approach took even longer than the group expected when Alistair’s horse was set upon by wolves. Leaving it with a horrible gash into his hind quarter causing the group to be forced to part with it in the next village and with everyone hauling the gear the only with any room left was Mira and her Ferelden Forder. A horse in which both of them were now pressed up against taking turns at the reigns to spread the load.

 

The terrain was steadily getting more arid and hot, a fact which both Varric and Blackwall were noticing with distain. Dorian on the other hand was loving it! They were nearing the next Inquisition camp, just on the horizon, the group would be there by nightfall. Mira was quietly sleeping against Alistair’s chest as he kept the horse moving and she from falling as he caged her with his arms.

She was a beautiful woman, all fire, fury, and quick wit wrapped in taut freckled muscles and flowing red hair…. Perfect lips and eyes as blue as a clear night’s sky, complete with flecks of starlight… Oh Andraste’s granny pants, when did he become a fucking poet! He shouldn’t be doing this! She was the Inquisitor and he was just an exiled bastard who happened to be good enough with a sword for the Warden’s to track him down and ask him back.

 

But, when she was like this, resting next to him he couldn’t hope to tap down his growing desire for her. He felt like he was 20 years old all over again and well he knew how well that turned out, it had only been 2 weeks for the Makers sake! This was ridiculous!

 

The next few days seemed to fly by in the battling of Vargests, Phoenixes and there was even a surprise visit from a Dragon which The Iron Bull seemed to be ecstatic about!

When they finally arrived, both Mira and her team were relived to find their wonderful young Dwarf whom they introduced to Alistair as Scout Harding. She cheerfully explained the ins and outs of the region, she even told them of a Keep that had been taken over by Venatori, that was _kind_ _of_ on the way to the Ritual Tower.

So needless to say, the team tore through the Keep like it was a sunny afternoon stroll.

 

Well to be honest it was very sunny, It’s a fucking Desert!

 

 

It was late in the evening when Alistair saw _her_ again, helping Harding and a few other Inquisition soldiers clean up the Keep. He noticed as she handed the Dwarf a letter with a smile and then watched her fumble and blush as Lace jokingly asked if it was for someone special.

 

 

“It’s just an update for the Commander.” He heard Mira mumble from over by the fire, Bull had left him in charge of keeping the fire steady as he went to help move some of the heavier equipment.

 

Commander? Well he knew someone had to be leading the Inquisition forces but it didn’t occur to him until then that he didn’t know who, in-fact he didn’t know much of anything about the Inquisition other than Mira was the Inquisitor and that her organisation fought against Corypheus.

 

He sighed to himself, it was quiet and quiet was a bad thing. The Calling, it was louder now, too loud. His fingers twitching around the stick he was using to poke the fire, it was calling him, humming in the back of his mind a symphony that dripped in blood and tainted things, so much that he was suffocating in it. He stood suddenly, turning away from the camp to try, and find somewhere to breathe!

 

He ended up wandering around the battlements, finding a dark spot on top of one of the towers, the wind was whipping through his hair making the desert nights all the cooler giving the needed shock to his system. A distraction from the song.

He didn’t know how long he stood there, staring out at the endless night and moon lit sands as he tried to control himself. Here he stood Alistair, veteran of the fucking 5th blight, slayer of Darkspawn, Bastard Prince of Ferelden and here he was terrified. Terrified that he was going to die, he was going to die and he never saw her face again. Never let himself love anyone again and now she was… Mira.

 

Mira fucking Trevelyan, he swore to himself that he’d never have these feelings. He’d never put himself through that pain again…. but Mira she was amazing and well he was dying.

“Well here we are again Alistair.” He chuckled to himself. Still a silly boy who never knew when to quit. But hey, at least the Calling had quietened.

 

“What? You been here before?” Mira asked as she appeared out of what seemed like thin air!

 

“Andraste’s Blood! Where did you come from!” Alistair yelled, jumping in surprise.

“Whoa, whoa, it’s just me. You alright?” she asked as she climbed over the top of the ladder and came towards him.

 

“I… I’m - * _Sigh_ *”

 

“You just sort of wandered off, I saved you some dinner though. Sorry it’s a bit cold.” Mira shrugged as she handed him a small pot before moving to lean on the wall next to him.

“Thanks. I uh had to get some air for a bit. Sorry.” He mumbled taking the stew, it was still pleasantly warm and if he ate it fast enough it would stay warm.

“Alistair, you don’t have to be sorry for anything. It’s been a long day.” Mira smiled, pulling her hair under her scarf to shield it from the wind.

 

“The Calling… it was louder before.” He continued trying to explain while scoffing down his stew.

“Ah. You said it was quieter when you’re talking. So, do you want to talk?” her grin was actually infectious so he accepted.

 

They talked for what seemed like hours! Tales of her adventures across Rivain and Orlais and even Ferelden. He talked about his travels during the Blight and the sorry state he was in when he was exiled. She told him the story of her Family and how she felt lighter now that most of them were gone. He told her about the Hero of Ferelden about how much he had loved her and how she backed him into a corner and tossed him aside. And slowly, ever so slowly they managed to slide down the wall to sit, leaning against each other.

 

“She came and found me you know? Yeah, a few years ago, she said she was going to search for a cure. A way to end the calling for all of us all… she asked for my help but I was drunk and still bitter, so I told her. Why in the void would I help her when she saved a murder and threw me out of my country? It wasn’t until the next day that I realized I wasn’t hallucinating and by then it was too late, I said things to her that I couldn’t possibly take back.” Alistair sighed taking a swig of the small flask that Mira had once again pulled out.

“That sounds… _horrible_. For both of you. I’m sorry.” She offered sincerely as he passed back the flask.

“It happened a long time ago, but I just wish it wasn’t the last thing I said to her… Doesn’t matter now.”

 

“You know, we’re pretty similar, you and I?” she sighed, hissing when she took her drink.

“What’d you mean?” he asked, rubbing his head to distract himself. The burn from the alcohol was strong, strong enough to make a Grey Warden buzz with its heat.

 

“You know? We both know a lot about having a proper shit time!” she laughed, taking another sip for good measure.

Alistair watched her, slightly worried, her whole body looked like it was being weighed down as she curled down against the stone walls.

“Did you know I was married once?” she asked slowly, cautiously even, as if the following information would change his option of her. He shook his head as she passed back the flask.

 

“People wave that title around like it’s the ‘be all or end all’ of the world, my Father used marriage as a business transaction. I’ll give you my daughter and you give me a position of power and influence to exploit.” She mocked in a deep voice before running her fingers through her hair.

“I married because I found a nice man, a friend. I married because I was terrified of what my Father would do if he found me, I married so I could blend in and be safe. A nobody woman in a tiny village, just ‘somebody’s wife’ but I didn’t marry for love. Well, at least I didn’t think so at the time.” Mira admitted, reaching out to take another drink, stomping her foot into the stone as the liquid burned down her throat.

 

Alistair listened intently, the sound of her voice was soothing even though her words were sad.

“It didn’t even realise I liked the man until he _showed_ me how much he loved me. He taught me how to heal people, how to brew potions and well, _booze_.” She grinned, shaking the flask slightly to prove her point as she passed it back.

 

“He was a mage, a healer and a kind man… and now he’s dead because of me. Because my Father lost one of his _fucking positions_ and need to use me as a trophy to bargain with.” She started to snarl, anger starting to spark out down her shoulders.

“He sent his men after me in greater numbers than I was expecting. Those monsters razed my home to the ground. _Killed_ whoever got in their way… they shoved me in a sack after they- … after they _made me watch_ as they killed Finn… They took me to my Father, back in Ostwick where he fed my family a story that my husband was a Blood Mage, that Finn had forced me to run away and that I was to tell anyone who asked after me that it was a blood mage….” The anger was there in full now, captured in the sheen of tears she stubbornly held back.

“The first time I tried to tell someone what had happened, they looked at me with pity. Fucking pity! My fucking father had told everyone the story about blood magic to gain support from the Chantry, he took away any voice I had to speak out against him! People kept telling me that I was safe now, that the filthy blood mage was dead and I was home. Finn was a good man, a kind man … and he deserved so much better than me.” Her voice caught, angry and upset. Sadness trapped like a bird in her throat.

 

Alistair watched as she ranted, clearly fuelled by drink and emotion, he remembered those days when all he could do was drink and curse Audrey’s name. But this… her own Father… Maker preserve her. He heard the tears fall to the stone before he heard her shaky breath. This woman, to be so utterly broken by people close to you and now here she is leader of the Inquisition, the Herald of Andraste and fixer of everything. He did the only thing he could think to do.

 

He put his arms around her and pulled her close, burying her against his chest so that he could try with all his might to keep her safe. He wouldn’t let anything happen to her, she had already had so much death and despair in her life and she was expected to endure so much more.

 

“You deserve better Mira. You deserve people who love and care about you, you deserve to be happy with whoever you choose to love and by the Maker and his bloody bride I am going to make sure you have it.” Alistair promised pressing his lips to her head tenderly as she cried softly, her hands fisting themselves into his shirt. He waited until her sobbing lessened, his large hand rubbing her back softly as he held her close. She took a few deep breaths to steady herself before she looked up at him, eye’s red and slightly puffy but her whole body appeared lighter, as if the weight that had been weighing her down over the past few days had been lessened.

 

He used his thumb to wipe away the last traces of tears from her cheeks, “Thank you Alistair… I think I needed that more than I realized.” She spoke quietly, words relieved and tired.

 

“Mira Trevelyan, when this is all over I want to join your Inquisition. I want to help.” He asked, her face inches from his own. Oh, he wanted to kiss her, but he wanted her answer.

“The Inquisition would be lucky to have you Alistair.” She smiled, her whole face beaming, “Now it’s really late, do you want to come to bed with me?”

Alistair instantly blushed at her suggestion, she didn’t really just ask _That_ did she?

 

“Oh! I meant to sleep but uh that, well you are um very handsome Alistair but uh tonight let’s just- I’m sorry- am I being weird? Sorry- _shit I’m rambling_. It’s cold let’s just- let’s just go to sleep.” Mira blushed just as vividly as Alistair was before moving rather quickly to stand and offer him a hand.

 

“You’re cold, here? How the hell did you survive in Ferelden?” he smiled looking to make light from the awkward situation because if he was honest with himself he actually really liked the first idea. _Maybe a little too much…_

“I had fire runes. Fire runes on _everything!_ ”

 

**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two updates in one day, aren't you guys lucky.   
> Also Alistair is starting to catch feelings, Mira as per usual is oblivious!


	19. A Letter to Cullen (NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Here we have the letter Mira wrote to Cullen from the Western Approach.

Chapter 19 –Letter to Cullen.

 

Cullen was in his office, sorting out a roster for the newly acquired keeps both Crestwood and the Western approach. It was mind numbing work trying to balance those he trusted but could spare against the myriad of names he didn’t recognise. They have had so many new recruits in the past few months and so it was getting harder and harder to keep track of them! Maker it was so late, maybe he should just call it a night.

*Knock, Knock*

 

“Enter.” Cullen grunted, still trying to decide who out of his senior staff was capable of leading the keep at the Western approach.

“Letter from the Inquisitor sir, Scout Harding sends her regards.” The messenger handed the letter over quickly and with a quick bow.

“Anything else?” he asked distantly, a letter to him from Mira?

“No sir.”

 

“Did the inquisitor also send a report for Sister Nightingale and Ambassador Montilyet?” he asked placing the letter on the table next to his work.

“Yes sir, although their letters seemed a lot shorter sir.” The messenger added helpfully.

 

“Must have something to do with troop movements. Thank you, that will be all this evening. I’ll be turning in soon.” Cullen smiled, dismissing the Messenger politely with a weary smile. He waited until the messenger had closed the door behind her before getting up to lock it and the other two doors.

 

Mira had sent him a letter and he wanted to give it his full attention and not be distracted by yet another messenger. He was careful when he broke the green seal, a little joke she once told Josephine ‘Well I’ve got a sparkly green hand, why not show the world!” and so she commissioned the perfect shade of green wax and a beautiful hand stamp for Mira’s letters.

The letter had been folded carefully as he opened it slowly. First thing he saw was her beautiful flowing writing, elegant and quick much like the woman herself.

_Cullen_

_You’ll be pleased to hear that Hawkes Warden friend, is actually a very pleasant and agreeable man. He_ _’s helped us clear both the Keep at Crestwood and the Keep here in the Western Approach._

_It’s been hot and there’s been no end of exhausting tasks getting here (Ask Leliana about Crestwood’s mayor!) Glad to report no major injuries so far just the usual wear and tear, although whenever I start smiling or for that matter frowning too much the boys start acting suspicious. I think they’re just worried, it’s sweet really._

_I never thought I’d miss Skyhold this much. It’s been a month since I last saw her, I hope you’re taking good care of my slightly dilapidated baby and I fully expect a bath to be drawn upon my return. Although I suspect that’ll be once I’ve collected all the sand from the Western approach into my boots and clothing! Maker’s breath it really does get everywhere!_

 

Maker, it’s nice to read her jokes. A month apart and this was the first news from her and it was good.

_I’ve figured out another way to manage the Anchor as it hurts less after I close some rifts. On the road in Crestwood the pain was proving to be a challenge, waking me up in the night and such but after we closed the big rift in the lake it got a lot better. (Remind me to ask Dagna and Solas about that.) The pain is tolerable now and it’s flaring up less, talking to the Warden and Hawke have been very welcome distractions._

 

Cullen paused feeling worried and slightly relieved that she had managed to work something out, she normally didn’t mention it but he had noticed that she would flinch sometimes when they spoke or when he watched her on the battlements he sometimes caught the green flash when her hand flared. He sighed and continued to read.

_You’ll probably be pleased to know that I miss you to, I’ve even taken to petting Varric glorious blonde chest hair for its own curly resemblance to your head. (Which is adorable and hot and I have no idea why you dislike it!) I miss having dinner with you and watching you blush at all my bad jokes._ _And I really miss the sex._

_So much! It’s been a month, surrounded by men and I can’t even spend 10 minutes alone with my utterly useless hand because I’m surrounded by men who worry like bloody Chantry sisters!_

_I don’t exactly know what to call this thing we’ve got going on, or if you even want there to be a **thing** , it’s a conversation I think we’ll have to have when I get back. But I think you should know I am quite fond of you Cullen._

 

_Fond of your hands, the way they caress my thighs, the feel of those callouses as they run across my skin when you spread my legs._

 

 

Oh Maker’s breath. She wasn’t, she didn’t write that! She didn't- she couldn't have! Could she??

 

_The feeling of your mouth as you kiss that wonderful scar down my neck, your hands on the swell of my breasts, your mouth coming down to tease at my nipples._

 

Cullen could feel himself hardening just reading her words, his breeches growing tighter as he imagined her body. Naked on her bed with the afternoon sun bathing her body as he trailed kisses down her pale freckled shoulders.

The taste of her skin under his tongue. The way she would laugh and giggle whenever he found a sensitive spot, which he would thoroughly exploit…. It was getting rather hard to concentrate sitting here with his breaches so tight, he actually feared that they might damage something. So, he took a breath to steady himself and quickly sorted out his desk for tomorrow before taking that letter and retiring to his loft.

 

It was a difficult task balancing the letter, the lantern and trying to climb the ladder with a furiously hard cock but he managed none the less. He placed the lantern by his bed making sure he had plenty of light to read by before he started to take off his armour.

 

It was getting warmer in Skyhold, still much colder than he was used to but it wasn’t as unbearable as the thick of winter when they arrived. With his armour neatly packed away on the rack he debated whether or not to just sleep in clothes or take them off, he decided to test the waters as it were and go for taking everything off. If this letter continued in the way she had headed, he was certainly going to be more comfortable.

He hopped into bed, sliding under the worn blanket with practised ease. His bed wasn’t as lavish as Mira’s but the staff had made sure that he was comfortable enough, plump pillows, warm blanket and even spare furs that were stored in a chest at the end of his bed.

He lay on his back quickly gathering the letter back so he could continue reading.

 

_The heat of your tongue as you tease my breasts, Cullen it’s one of my favourite things. And then you go lower…_

 

His free hand started to drift lower to, just trailing softly over the expanse of his stomach.

_Lower and lower with your mouth, biting and kissing and use that wonderful tongue of yours as you slowly tease your way to my thighs, completely avoiding the area I want you in most! Because I think you like to tease, I think you like to work me up so much to the point where I can’t even think about anything but **you** and your mouth and your cock and every fucking thing I want to do to you! _

_(Hope you’re enjoying yourself Cullen because I am going to be thinking of things to do to you, getting more and more aroused and yet unable to get off!)_

 

Cullen couldn’t help but let out a little laugh as he read her added note, even in the middle of being an amazing sex goddess she still found a way to make it funny, to make him laugh. Maker he needed this woman back here. His hand had travelled firmly towards his cock as he took to stroking it at a slightly distracting pace, fist curling on every upstroke to wrap around his head and smear his precum down over his shaft, trying to chase the feeling of her wetness. Of Mira.

_And when you finally decided to give me what I want, the feeling I get almost makes me want to cum right there on the spot, on your tongue. There is nothing as good as your tongue Cullen!_

_(Well, maybe your cock, but that’ll have to wait for another letter, the boys are getting suspicious again. I told Varric I was recording the local plants!)_

_And the way your mouth works as you lap at my wet cunt Cullen and the little groans you make as you work. It makes me want to think that you enjoy it, you enjoy burying your face between my folds, and you enjoy the way you can so completely make me fall apart under your tongue._

 

Maker he wanted her so badly right now. If he was a weaker man he would have gone right to his horse and would be halfway across the bridge out of Skyhold by now! His hand on his cock moved faster, this woman, this amazing woman who had written such dirty things for him.

He wanted to keep her here in his bed and never let her go. He wanted to make love to her every hour of every day for the rest of his life, he wanted to consume her body and soul and be consumed as well.

 

The pleasure was teetering on too much, the intoxicating swell of lust for her, his overwhelming desire to have her again spurring him onto a release that was fast approaching.

_And when I finally cum Cullen, it’s because you made me, you and your prefect bloody mouth have made my world shatter into a mindless pleasure… made me cum into your mouth, sated and pleased. And then afterwards I want to kiss you, I want to taste the pleasure you caused on your tongue and then after that. While I’m still warm and wet from your mouth, I want you to take me, fuck me with your cock, make me cum all over again and make me yours._

 

It was with that final thought that Cullen came, his hand fisting harshly on his cock as his hips rose to meet it. His breathing ragged and strangled as the pleasure swelled and he came in thick white spurts over his stomach and chest, his mind turning blank as his body went lax. Pleasure washing over him in warm tingling waves as he stroked the last dregs of his orgasm from his cock, reading over the last few lines of his letter.

_Now, I hope you’ve got the idea Cullen of what I want when I get back and I hope you appreciate the fact of how frustrated I’ll be on my return._

_A tired and incredibly frustrated_

_Mira Trevelyan_

Cullen’s eye’s drifted close. The pleasure and exhaustion from his ever-long days had left him slowly slipping into sleeps tight hold as he allowed himself to be cocooned in it, welcoming sleeps embrace as he drifted. Telling himself that the rest of the letter could be read tomorrow.

 

**

_P.S_

_I managed to retrieve this letter from Harding before I went out and I’m sorry to put a damper on my previous notions._

_We’ve just finished our investigation at the Ritual Tower the Warden spoke of. Corypheus is controlling the Warden’s through fear tactics to summon demons and bind the mages to him. He’s building an army Cullen; I’m returning to Skyhold with full haste. I should be arriving at the end of the month if we get a clear path, pray that we do._

_Ask Josephine to see if she can source some sappers, I’ve been informed the Wardens are gathering at Adamant Fortress in the Western Approach. Cullen, I need you to prepare the troops for battle and be ready to march within 2 days of my return and have Leliana send her scouts to the Griffin’s Keep here, Hawke, Varric and Blackwall will stay behind to meet them and keep an eye on the situation._

_See you soon_

_Mira._

**

 

However, Cullen didn’t notice her parting words until the next morning when he finally woke up after falling into a blissfully unaware sleep. He tore through the keep, shouting orders left and right as he practically kicked Rylen out of bed and pulled him into a meeting with Leliana and Josephine to explain the situation.

 

“Cullen, months end is just over a week away. I can have the soldiers equipped and ready for battle within 3 days.” Rylen confirmed, between the two of them It was possible.

“I can arrange for Sappers and siege equipment to be delivered from a few of our supporters, would you like it to meet us on the road or here Commander?” Josephine asked as she furiously scrawled down notes to her board.

“Depends where they’re coming from, if they’re on the route to the western approach have them meet us on the road. If not, then here.”

 

“Commander I would like to see that letter if you don’t mind.” Leliana asked with her hand stretched forth. Cullen paused suddenly flushing as he remembered what else was contained in that letter.

“Ah yes, hold a moment,” he asked as he pulled out the letter and quickly tore off the important section for Leliana and handed it forwards to her and her suspicious face. “The rest of the letter was of a rather personal nature and very much doubt that it the Inquisitor would like it read here.” Cullen mumbled, pressing the important post script into the Spymasters hand.

 

“Oh, I don’t know Commander; it might be in code.” Leliana smirked teasingly and Rylen stifled a chuckle.

“It’s not in code, I assure you.” Cullen growled turning back towards the map.

“Relax Cullen she’s only teasing. At least I hope she’s only teasing.” Josephine smiled, shooting Leliana a glance who returned with an innocent look. Cullen just grumbled again.

 

“Adamant Fortress is a formidable target it will not be easy to take. I know a contact who can get us some plans of the construct, we can use them to better plan our assault.” Leliana added helpfully, plans of the fortress would defiantly be helpful.

 

“That would be appreciated, that also brings me to my next item. As you know the Inquisitor has taken Griffon’s Keep, I plan on sending a squadron of soldiers there to maintain it and also use it as a training grounds for our soldiers. Rylen, I’ve asked you here today not only because you’re my Lieutenant but because you’re only the man I trust to lead that Keep and not let it fall into ruin. Will you lead them?” Cullen asked the rather stunned man. Rylen was rarely stunned so this must come as a surprise, Cullen hoped it was a welcome one.

 

“I – Sir. It would be my honour.” Rylen bowed slightly as the other two at the table smiled at the scene, Rylen had become at home here within the Keep, often keeping the men in line but also not afraid to take part in their revelry. Reliable and clever, the perfect candidate.

“Good because you’ll be marching with us too Adamant and keeping a selection of soldiers with you when we depart. The Inquisition appreciates this, I appreciate this!” Cullen sighed with a tired but welcome smile before he moved to shake Rylen’s hand, which turned into a grab of each other’s armbrace and a quick shake.

 

“If there’s nothing else, I believe we’re going to be very busy for the next few days. Shall we?” Leliana finished, handing the letter back to Cullen and gesturing for everyone to leave.

 

“Cullen, will you hold a moment?” Leliana asked still leaning over the table. Cullen paused as he was heading for the door, he turned slightly confused as to what the stoic Spymaster wanted of him.

“Yes?”

 

“So, our Inquisitor sent you a rather interesting letter no?” She smiled, cracking the blank façade

“I uh, as I said earlier, it is rather private.” Cullen flushed, his hand twitching in an attempt to rub the back of his head.

“Ah Commander, take care of her and yourself.” Leliana smiled warmly, Cassandra had said she had a soft side.

 

“I will, thank you. I should really start getting the troops prepared. My lady.” He smiled, bowing slightly before leaving the room. He hurried down the hall only to find Rylen waiting for him just past the door that lead into the main hall.

 

 

“So, Commander, I take it your date went well if that display was anything to go by.” Rylen chuckled just loud enough for Cullen to hear him, he whirled on him, looking at his friend and lieutenant with a surprised and also slightly embarrassed look.

“I really should have torn that part of the letter off before I ordered this meeting. Maker’s breath, even Leliana questioned me about it!” Cullen groaned rubbing his forehead as the pair walked towards the armoury to find the Quartermaster.

 

“So, what did our lovely inquisitor write?”

“Oh, wouldn’t you like to know.” Cullen shot childishly, maker’s breath did he ever really grow up?

“You’re right I would, but I can also speculate. Now Mira’s not your average woman, she’s fiery. So, I’m gonna say by the way you’re blushing that she wrote something unspeakably dirty?” Rylen questioned, watching the Commanders face intently for any clues

 

“Ah well, she is a very special woman.” Cullen attempted to joke, giving into a little bit of boyish revelry with his friend. Rylen practically beamed at Cullen’s words, slapping his friend on the arm lightly before falling into laughter.

“Aye, that she is. Come on! Those troops won’t organise themselves!” Rylen sighed wistfully, before slapping the commander again, moving towards the yard quickly before the commander could retaliate.


	20. Bad News

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mira returns to Skyhold and Cullen. Only to have her day ruined by some seriously bad news.

Chapter 20 – Bad News.

 

“So that’s Skyhold? That’s a pretty impressive fortress you have here Inquisitor.” Alistair admired the structure ahead of him, proud and strong as if it was carved out of the mountainside to touch the sky.

 

“Yes, she is, isn’t she? Look! They fixed the western tower.” She smiled proudly leaning back onto Alistair’s chest as her horse climbed a steep slope.

“Aw yeah, Now I can nap after drinks with the boys!” Bull cheered spurring his horse a little faster. Mira had to admit, the sight of a giant Quinari on horseback was odd at first but she had slowly gotten used to it.

 

Mira just laughed, following Iron Bull’s lead as they came to the bridge into Skyhold. The gates we open when the guards realised who was riding, mostly by Bull’s loud laughter as the group road across the bridge and into the main keep, making a direct beeline towards the stables to get their horses seen to, they had pushed them to near breaking point the entirety of the past week to get to Skyhold faster. They managed to save 3 days off their estimated arrival.

 

“Inquisitor, glad to see your back. I see you’ve been working our horses. I’ll take care of them, go see to your business things have been quite busy around here.” Dennet greeted quickly before getting his stable hand to help him bring in the horses and another to take the equipment and send it to the respected rooms.

 

There was a flash of yellow ruffles that travelled closer at an alarming speed. “Inquisitor! You’re back.” Josephine called out as she rushed towards the tired party. Mira turned to greet her as Josie looked around at her tired companions and their newest addition.

“Josie, it’s good to see you. How’s my dilapidated baby been doing?” Mira greeted her ambassador with a weary smiled as she pulled the beautiful Antivan woman in for a quick hug.

“Inquisitor, how many times have I asked you to stop referring to Skyhold as your ‘dilapidated baby’? The nobles are starting to talk.” Josie sighed, reminding her friend once more about the balance of their reputation.

“You’ll have to remind me only a few more times, I swear. Anyway, may I introduce our new Warden friend? Alistair, this is Josephine Montilyet our noble Ambassador and diplomat, Josie this is Alistair, veteran of the 5th Blight.” Mira introduced warmly both parties bowing in respect to the other.

 

“The Alistair?” Josephine asked with intrigue.

“Maker’s breath, that’s it I’m changing my name! Yes, that was me, but for now I’m just Alistair.” He smiled, moving to shake the Ambassadors hand.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, we’ll have a room ready for you within the hour. If you would like, I can show you around in the mean time?” Josephine offered, retaining her pleasing and welcoming demeanour.

 

“Actually, I would really like some lunch if that was possible?” Alistair asked hopefully. Mira chuckled behind him, no one would ever question a Grey Wardens appetite as long as he was around.

“Certainly, I believe the tavern is about to serve lunch or I could have something brought up to the great hall if you would prefer?” Josie offered, Mira smiled warmly towards her diplomat.

“The Tavern sounds like an excellent idea Lady Montilyet.” Alistair smiled as he agreed and Josie started to lead the way, pausing slightly to wait for Mira to join them.

 

“Ah, you two go on ahead and get settled in. I am going to take the longest bath I can afford. Someone to send the Commander to my quarters, I need to give him a report on the situation and find out how our troop planning is going.” Mira smiled, waving both of them off with a half-hearted wave as the pair wandered off and were quickly joined by Dorian and Bull when they started to head for Tavern.

 

 

On her way to her quarters Mira managed to grab both a runner and a servant and ordered one to find summon the Commander and the other to draw her a bath as she headed up. Her room was exactly as she left if about a month ago, bed made, papers still scattered over her desk, brewing equipment all still neatly lined up in the space she’d set up. With any luck, some of the potions she had been brewing should be ready by now and also a rather nice Cider she had been making!

The staff in Skyhold were in Mira’s opinion some of the finest men and women she’s ever had the pleasure of meeting, professional and kind as the two Maids came up quickly to set up the Bath. They filled up the bath with water, brought up in large buckets and used fire runes to heat it in the bath, they even poured a small amount of floral oil into the tub and sprinkled the top with flower petals.

 

Mira was so pleased with their work that she thought it only right to tip them with a few bottles of her freshly brewed Cider with the strict instruction to drink it only when they were off duty. The Maids accepted only after some flustered curtsies and insistence that they didn’t need gifts before they went on their way. Mira quickly disrobed, a small amount of sand came of out the joins in-between her armour… she would have to get someone to help her clean it thoroughly.

 

She slowly slipped into the bath, the water was just on the right side of hot a soothing heat to diffuse the tension in her sore muscles. The copper bath was wide and deep, long enough for two people to sit comfortably. Mira sighed as she let herself slip under the water enjoying the feel of the water flow through her hair and relax the muscles in her neck, she moaned softly content to lay there and float for a while.

A little while later as Mira was still relaxing after she had cleaned herself to an acceptable standard she heard the dull thud of footsteps coming closer up the stairs. Groaning with irritation at having her bath disturbed, Mira rolled to poke her head over the top of the copper rim to see who was disturbing her. Her earlier irritation was wiped clean when she saw the slicked back blond hair and red fluff of his mantle.

 

Cullen.

 

“Hey you.” She sighed happily, delighting in the way he blushed when he realised where she was. She kept the rest of her body hidden for the moment, _no need to shock the poor man so soon._

“You’re back earlier than we expected.” He smiled taking off his coat as he sat down on the couch, the hot bath making the room pleasantly warmer than the rest of Skyhold.

 

“Oh, you know me, couldn’t stay away. You got my letter then?” she asked with a chuckle, folding her arms over the side of the tub, giving Cullen a decent view of her wet and naked back.

“Oh, I got your letter.” He growled lowly with a lopsided grin. “You are amazing; you know that?”

 

“I had an idea.” She smirked, “We’ve got some time Commander, why don’t you get rid of the armour and join me?” she purred moving to lean back in the tub, resting her arms over the sides. All he had to do was stand and he would see her breasts just teasing on the water’s edge.

“Or I have a better idea? That’s if you want to of course.” He asked looking at her with a sly smirk.

“Go on then Commander you have my full attention.” Mira accepted with a lustful glance to see Cullen slowly peeling off his armour, starting with his armbraces and moving on to his breastplate the metal clinking when it hit the floor.

 

“Well, you could come over here and let me look at you?” Cullen growled, there was a hint of an order hidden in that question and that excited her. Cullen being dominant, ooh that thought sent tingles down her spine.

Mira slowly stood from the bath, a smirk pulling at her lips and the warm water sliding down in rivulets along her curves. Gracefully and slowly she placed one foot after the other out of the bath, the water now dripping softly into the rugs as she stood there wet and naked all for his viewing pleasure.

 

“So, Commander, does this please you?” Mira asked lowly as she trailed her hand from the inside of her knee, collecting the water droplets across her body, before coming to rest on her hip, her eye’s not leaving the Commanders.

Cullen’s eyes darkened at the sight, her wonderful body on full display for him. No shame, no fear, just her and her strength, her lust and desire on show for him. He growled deeply, quickly ridding himself of the rest of his armour and shirt as he stalked towards her.

“Mira you are-“

****

**_*Bang, Bang, Bang*_ **

 

 

“Inquisitor. Inquisitor open the door it’s urgent!” Came Leliana’s commanding voice through the door at the base of the stairs.

 

Mira looked up at Cullen their faces mirroring a mixture of worry, disappointment, and slight irritation at being interrupted. Cullen sighed, leaning in to give her a gentle kiss before handing her the robe she had set out earlier. Mira slipped it on quickly as Cullen put himself back together, listening to the door as Mira opened it.

“Leliana what’s going on? What’s urgent?” Mira asked calmly, hand wringing out her long hair in an effort to get it to dry faster.

 

“I’ve just received word from my scouts on the road, your brother Lord Trevelyan was on his way to Skyhold to finalise the transfer of his estate with Josephine when they were set upon by bandits. The message claimed that they have taken hostages and are demanding an audience.  Inquisitor according to what our scouts observed these seemed to be the same men whom your father hired to capture you, they were sentenced to death by your brother but escaped.” Leliana informed handing over the missive she received so that Mira could read the bandits rather crude words herself.

 

Mira felt her word tilt sharply as she read the words.

_Inquisition._

_It’s has come to myself and my men’s attention that you are an organisation run by that blood mages whore Mira Trevelyan and due to that fact, we have business to discuss._

_So, let’s make things simple._

_We have Lord Timothy Trevelyan, we have his son, barely 4 years old, and his very pretty wife. _

_If you want to see them alive again, send that blood mages whore, Mira Trevelyan with 100 sovereigns to the broken bridge 10 miles south of Skyhold._

_Send no-one else or I will hand Trevelyan’s pretty wife to my boys and they can do what they like with her._

_Much like we did with the blood bitch._

_Signed_

_Knight-Captain Rigel of Ostwick._

 

 

Mira was frozen, her world slowly turned red.

_Blood_.

 

She wanted this man’s blood, he had tortured her, given her to his mercenaries as a play thing and now he had taken her brother. He was going to die; he was going to burn. She was going to tear strips off the man and burn them one at a time!

The note slowly began crumple in her hand before she came back to herself. Leliana was in front of her, calling her name and Cullen was behind her, his hand resting softly on her shoulder as he shook her back to the present.

 

“Leliana, go to the tavern. Get the Warden, get Bull and the Chargers and tell them to meet me by the gates, send a runner to the armoury tell them to get a sack and fill it with as much scrap as they can fit in it and bring it to the gates.” Mira ordered coming back into herself with a start, with a fire in her belly that would only be extinguished with bloodshed. She had a plan and Leliana seemed to understand as she nodded wordlessly as she darted off to complete her mission.

 

“Mira what’s going on?” Cullen asked, his voice full of worry. He had never seen her like this, not even when she went and faced down a god in Haven. She pushed passed him like a lion knocking over a nug, her movements hurried, jittery almost manic even as she ripped open her wardrobe to pull out a set of dark armour and a chest that clinked and rattled as she placed it on her desk.

“Mira. Love, talk to me.” Cullen asked again. His own armour was on; his sword was once again strapped to his side. He would follow her no matter where she led but this, right now, she was starting to scare him.

 

“They have my brother, they have his wife and son…. The monsters my father hired to capture me, force me back to Ostwick, to end up drugged and beaten into his plans... The former Knight-Captain Rigel of Ostwick and his band of scum.” She growled, short and vicious as she pulled on her armour, it was sleeker than her normal, the joints well maintained as it seemed to mould to her form, providing her with protection and mobility.

“He wants me to bring 100 sovereigns and come alone to meet him at the broken bridge, just off the river.” Mira continued so focused on her task as she opened the chest with great care and carefully pulled out flasks and vials, placing them on the desk and counting them out before stowing them in little pouches in her armour.

 

“You can’t go alone. This is clearly a trap to get to you, do you know their numbers?” Cullen questioned, instantly moving into military mode.

 

“Of course, it’s a bloody trap!” Mira shouted turning wildly to the surprised face of her Commander, in her flurry of movement she knocked one of the vials from the desk. It shattered on the floor leaving a hissing and bubbling mess as it burned a hole through the carpet and into the floor boards. She stopped seemingly as surprised at her actions as he was before she sighed softly and replaced the vial.

 

“I don’t know how many they are, I don’t know if my plan will even work and frankly I don’t care. They have my brother; they have his family. I will not abandon them to these monsters to be abused as I was!  Cullen, I can’t – I – Fuck…” she mumbled at the end, her breath coming rapidly as she realised she was quickly falling into a full-blown panic attack.

 

Cullen moved quickly, cradling her head in his hands as he pulled her close, careful not to damage any of those dangerous vials and flasks as he stroked her messy red hair with his fingers, smoothing out the half-dried frizz and brushing it back into her usual style over her shoulders. He kept her close, encouraging her to follow his own breathing and the sound of his voice. _Breathe_.

 

“We will get them back Mira, we will bring those monsters in to face your justice but I will not let you go in there alone. I will not risk you. Not now.” Cullen whispered into her hair, his grip on her arm tightening just ever so slightly. It distracted her, comforted her in his arms.

Mira mumbled softly into the fur on Cullen’s coat, her arms reciprocating and moving to hold him as well. “I won’t go alone… I’ve got a plan, well the beginning of a plan.”

 

“Just tell me what you need done. I’m coming with you.” He promised, kissing her hair as they held each other giving one last squeeze before they broke apart.

“I… Thank you Cullen, I’ll explain on the road. Come on, there’s a shield in the cupboard you’ll need it.” Mira pointed as she adjusted a pair of hidden bladed behind her back before strapping on her usual double-sided blades.

 

Once the pair was equipped they rushed down to the gates to meet the others. Mira having calmed down, the fire returning to her belly as she approached the group, Cullen close on her heels armed for war.

 

 

“Mira, what’s going on?” Alistair asked worriedly, He had been surprised to see Leliana again but the surprise turned to gnawing anxiety when she ordered both him and half the Tavern to prepare for battle.

“Right, there is a situation. Bandits have attacked and captured a group of travellers on the main road, the travellers consist of my brother, his wife and their four-year-old son. They have demanded me and 100 sovereigns. This is a hostage situation and I cannot afford to fail.” Mira addressed the group, head held high, back straight and eyes sharp. Intimidating and fierce.

 

The group nodded and mumbled in acceptance, all of them feeling the seriousness of the situation.

 

“Cullen and Alistair will accompany me when I meet them, they expect a lady of nobility and when do the nobility ever do something without servants. Not that I think you two are servants or anything it’s just the role I need you to play.” Mira assured when there was a look of confusion from some of the others in the crowd.

“Anything you need.” Cullen confirmed and Alistair nodded also, a brief flicker of recognition flashing across his face when the other man spoke.

 

“Bull, I need you and the chargers on stand by and out of sight. I don’t know their numbers but the meeting is at the broken bridge south of here, there are a few hills and scrub to hide in. Stitches, I need you to be prepared to act on any injury grab some of the mage healers if you need. Priority is to rescue the hostages then kill the bandits. They have attacked my family, threatened me now and I have had dealings with them before. They will not live past this day.”

 

“Understood.” Came the resounding cry from the group before they moved to saddle their horses and prepare for travel. Alistair and Cullen both moving to Mira’s side.

 

 

“You’re the Warden?” Cullen asked, frowning slightly as he tried to place the other man, still putting out his hand in a friendly gesture.

“Alistair and you’re Cullen, right? We met a long time ago, I doubt you’d remember me.” Alistair greeted shaking the other man’s hand as Cullen recognised who he was talking to.

 

Something dropped in his stomach, panic rising as the recognition dawned on him… Alistair, Alistair Therin… the Grey Warden who stole Audrey’s heart, who was there when she…

“You were there, in the tower with Audrey.” Cullen spoke slowly, trying to tamper down on the memories that flashed before his eyes.

_It’s over, in the past. Focus your mind here Cullen!_

 

Alistair grinned kindly none the less, not quite as oblivious as he seemed to Cullen’s panic but he knew from experience that he had it under control.

“Oh yeah, Audrey. Maker that was a long time ago. Good to see you’re feeling better! Are you the Com-”

 

“I’m sorry to interrupt but we really need to go, we can all catch up after we… after we rescue my brother.” Mira stumbled through her sentence as she hoisted herself up onto a fresh horse, her own still exhausted from the journey back to Skyhold.

“Of course.” The pair answered, mounting their own horses.

 

 

The group was just about to leave when Leliana flagged down Mira with some new information.

Her scout had just arrived back with fresh Intel, there were two locations good for an ambush and they seemed to be centralised in a clearing just off the broken bridge about 20 of them with the hostages in a tent with 2 guards. Her brother appeared to be injured, a broken leg, no blood. She thanked Leliana quickly before spurring her horse onward, shouting the information to the rest of them.

Mira rode like the world was ending, pushing her horse on a constant charge for 8 miles before they came to a fork in the road to which she slowed her horse, turning him to address the rest of the team.

 

“Right, Leliana’s scouts said that there was a good spot for ambushing up this path and another moving this way.” She addressed pulling out her map to show both Bull and Krem who would lead the two ambushes.

 

“Cullen, Alistair and myself will move into create a distraction and try and secure the hostages. It’ll be a bit of a stretch but I can probably convince them that you’re servants or concubines or something. I’ll keep them from asking too many questions, just look pretty and not too intimidating. We’re trying to keep their attention on us and not startle them into killing the hostages.”

 

“Concubines huh, I’m sure we can handle that.” Alistair smirked, nudging Cullen a little trying to lighten the mood. Cullen just sighed, rolling his eyes but it made Mira smile.

 

“Maybe later lover boy but for now let’s go rescue these damsels.”


	21. Bring up the Past.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mira goes to confront her demons.
> 
> Warnings for - Mentions of past Rape and Assault. Violence. Angst and Anger issues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again heads up guys, the next two chapters are not going to be pretty.
> 
> Warnings for - Mentions of past Rape and Assault. Violence. Angst and Anger issues.

Chapter 21 – Bring up the past.

 

Both teams were in position, there horses hidden and out of sight as they made the rest of the way on foot, Cullen carrying the sack of scrap metal, covered with a tight band of cloth and a layer of coins sprinkled on top so that if it were to be inspected they'd find the coins they were looking for, just not as much as they were looking for.

 

Before they departed from the group Mira made both Cullen and Alistair give up any identifying insignias, making them trade shirts with some of the other Chargers while their more valued possessions (Cullen’s coat and Alistair’s Warden Badges.) were hidden in a cloak and in the tree stump that their horses were tied to. Both of them were armed, carrying their swords along with one of Mira’s elegant daggers each so it appeared to any that glanced at her that she was unarmed.

 

The entered the camp in clear view to its occupants who seemed to be oblivious to the Chargers lying in wait. The men heckled and cheered as Mira walked through the camp, followed behind by Cullen and Alistair on either side.

_“Hey, remember me sweetheart? I remember you and your sweet ass.”_

_“No her mouth was better, only way to shut that whore up.”_

 

Both Alistair and Cullen cringed at the crude remarks as Mira walked ahead unflinching as they kept going.

_“Remember that time Rigel fucked her bloody, Maker that bitch howled. Getting paid to fuck up some pretty nobles’ cunt. Nothing sweeter.”_

Alistair flashed a worried look to Cullen both of them worried and disgusted by the scum around them.

 

“Hold it right there.” Barked the order of a single man, stood at the centre of the camp, clad head to toe in blackened and broken Templar armour, his helm off so you could see his disgusting face. Scared by Wyvern poison on one side, just as ugly on the other with his slicked back black hair and his hollow beady eyes. Knight-Captain Rigel.

 

“What part of come alone escaped that pretty little head of yours?” Rigel growled gesturing to the two standing behind Mira. Cullen’s hands shifted, holding the sack a little tighter when he realised who was talking.

 

“Surely you don’t expect a woman of nobility such as myself to carry such a heavy burden on my own, the other ones there because he looks pretty. It’s for aesthetical reasons.” Mira simpered glancing at her nails as she put on the act of an arrogant noble. To be honest, Cullen thought she did it quite well.

“I think someone hasn’t been beating enough sense into you. Would you like us to rectify that girl?” the Knight Captain growled stalking forwards to examine his ‘guests’.

 

“I think someone should, those two over there are awfully tame in bed. No bite marks or bruises nothing! Can you believe it?!” Mira scoffed, her posture seemed relaxed but Alistair could see the muscles jumping in her neck.

“What pathetic piles of piss are the Inquisition accepting? You need someone who’ll make you scream.” Rigel purred, coming so close that Mira could smell the foul stench of rotting teeth mixed with the sweetness of Lyrium.

 

“Hmm, I’ll tell you exactly what I need.” Mira smiled drawing him in closer, “Proof of life.” She sighed stepping past him in a bored tone. The Knight-Captain smiled, a sickening grin twisting his already twisted face as he followed her like a dog on a leash.

 

“Straight to business then, I like that. Bring out our guests!” he shouted and his men jumped to obey, a guard came out first before gesturing for his captives to move past him.

Out came a short, pale, blond woman, clearly a more sensible Orlesian as she was holding a small ginger haired boy close on her hip as she hushed his hiccupping cries. _The Wife, must be,_ Mira thought quickly. There was a loud grunt and a sharp pained cry before a tall auburn-haired man fell through the tent flaps, clearly in pain. _Timothy. Timothy Trevelyan._

 

“You broke his leg?” Mira frowned clearly unimpressed with the damage. Timothy looked up, shocked to see his sister. A woman he hadn’t seen since she was 14 years old, just before she ran. _Never like this_. She stood as regal as a Queen and looking as ruthless as a Pirate… his sister.

 

“Stupid git tried to fight when we captured his party, fell off his horse when we brought it down. Tell you what, I’ll give you a discount on account of the damage, _milady_ , 99 sovereigns not 100.” Rigel smirked making Mira turn back and face him.

 

“Ah you are generous. Let me look them over first. I want to know what I’m trading my money for.” Mira shot back quickly, eye’s turning back to her boys. A signal to prepare, they were only going to have seconds and the two of them needed to make a big enough commotion so she could get her hostages away from the guards.

“By all means.” Rigel smirked bending slightly in a mock bow as he backed up a few steps to look at her two ‘companions’.

 

“You, if you really are Timothy. When we were younger the cook used to tell stories of a famous warrior and her Mabari.” Mira questioned forcing the man, her brother to look at her. “What was the Mabari’s name?”

“Tadwinks the Terror.” Timothy replied slowly clearly confused as to what she was getting at.

 

“Good and do you remember what Tadwinks favourite game was?” Mira asked again, holding her finger up to make him pause and hold his answer. He thought about it and nodded once, now understanding what she was up to. He turned to his wife and threw her a look that screamed _‘Get ready’_ as Mira gave the signal behind her.

 

There was a crash of metal as her boys moved. Cullen throwing the sack full of scrap into the closest bandit before drawing his sword on them, Alistair following his lead and cutting down another. The distraction was set, the confusion and anger spread through the camp like wildfire. Mira moved fast, grabbing the small hidden blades at her waist and launching herself over her brother to stab his guards. One in the neck, the other with a clear shot into his eyeball, both of them falling to the ground with sick thuds.

 

Rigel roared at Mira’s treachery and charged on her as she tried to lift her brother up, both his wife and child running to find a place to hide. There was a resounding war cry that deafened the camp as both parties of Chargers came swarming into the camp cutting off retreat and providing some much needed back up as both Alistair and Cullen were quickly becoming overwhelmed.

 

Rigel moved with a swiftness and a fury that Mira could not have predicted. Smashing into her with his shoulder before she even managed to pull out another dagger, she grunted on impact feeling her last dagger slip from her grasp in the attack as she stumbled backwards, Rigel hot on her tail as he slashed at her with his sword.

 

“You fucking bitch, Samson said you’d try something like this!” Rigel roared as he swiftly turned and kicked her brother in the head, there was a sickening crunch as his boot crushed Timothy’s nose.

 

Mira roared at the assault, hands quickly grabbing a flask, hot like its contents as she smashed it to her chest. Fire burst out all around her body, curling around her chest and arms and she charged. Barrelling at the bastard with all the strength she had, shouting out a terrible battle cry as she caught him by the waist, pressing her burning body against his, the flames licking at his face and he scorched as they were both knocked backwards.

Mira managed to connect her burning fists to his face all of 3 times before she was knocked off him by another bandit’s foot that connected harshly with her shoulder. The flames wore off quickly, the battle was raging around them. Mira now facing down two large armed angry ex-Templars, unarmed and whilst her brother was groaning on the floor behind them.

 

“Guys I need some help here!” Mira cried out another flask in her hand, ready for them. Then they charged, both of those angry ex-Templars straight at Mira, only they never got there. With a pair of loud yells both Alistair and Cullen engaged Mira’s attackers before they reached her, stopping each of them in their tracks with their shields.

Mira gasped, both surprised and relieved that they got there in time and proceeded to relieve her daggers from them before trying to get her brother to safety and find his wife and son.

"GO! Get out of here! We've got this!" Cullen shouted, knocking one of the bandits back with his shield.

 

Mira nodded, falling back to grab her brother.

 

“Tim, TIMOTHY! Get up, right now!” Mira yelled pulling her brother up by the arm, taking his weight from his broken leg as she tried to get him out of the fray.

“Annette, we need to find Annette and Joran! I need to find them.” Timothy shouted back, his face streaming with blood from his broken nose, his eye swollen from the impact of the boot.

“We will I promise, but you need to move faster and listen to me. Understood?” Mira growled tossing her flask of fire at the ground near an incoming bandit, lighting him up like a dry pine.

 

“Understood.” He gasped back, trying to limp faster along with this woman who he couldn’t quite believe was his sister. Mira spotted a bandit coming up fast with a growled command of _Drop_ Mira let go of her brother to swiftly and viciously cut down her attacker with a speed and precision that was to be marvelled at. Out of the corner of her eye Mira saw Iron Bull and Krem escorting a blonde woman and her child through the battlefield.

 

“ANNETTE!” Timothy called out, relieved at the sight of his wife. Bull paused noticing who the bloody man was with and quickly sent his Chargers to clear the path so that Krem could retrieve Timothy while Mira took care of yet another attacker.

“Bull, get them out of here!” Mira yelled over the battle, moving away only when she knew her brother and his family were safe.

 

She had a mission here, she had a purpose. Knight Captain Rigel was going to die, by her hands. She was running, cutting her way through the slowly thinning fight, cutting down a particularly foul-mouthed bandit who had some rather unpleasant things to say about her. He was fast, managing to catch her with a neat cut on the inside of her elbow which stung like a bugger before she finally put him down.

She looked up, both Cullen and Alistair were fighting just ahead of her with only Rigel left as he was slowly backed into the centre of the camp.

 

“Oh, now isn’t this a sight. Shall we throw you in a sack and burn down your home now? Just so we can come full circle?” Mira mocked as she stalked closer, moving like smooth silk past her boys as they stayed on guard.

“I should have snapped your neck when you were choking on my cock.” Rigel spat. He was panting, exhausted and near broken but he wasn’t giving up.

 

“Give up Knight-Captain, put down your sword and we can settle this nicely. I mean I only get to kill you once.” Mira smiled, it was vicious and cold, so unlike the woman known to the inquisition.

 

“Like I’ll listen to you, you fucking bitch. But I know somethings, I know about you! About what you try to hide! The Riviani spells may keep you balanced but you are nothing! NOTHING! When I do this.” Rigel was raving, ranting now and it left Mira confused. She paused slightly, close enough for her to strike but far enough for her to escape if need be.

 

Rigel stared at her, his hand reaching out, and then Mira felt it, _a crushing burning weight coursing through her arm! The anchor flared letting lose a massive discharge as Rigel aimed his smite well._

Mira yelled in pain, lashing out her sword arm wildly in an attempt to get him to stop!                                                                                                                                                                                

 

“I know you blood bitch, that mark on your hand isn’t the only magic you try to hide! What if I aimed this smite to your head, would that spell swell up? Would it burst?” he sneered, just stepping back out of reach as the anchor neared the end of its charge. Mira turned to glare at him, purposely making herself look small, almost daring him to come at her, try to hurt again, he wouldn’t get another shot.

 

Rigel smirked, obviously taking the bait. He took a step, then another and then… he was in range.

 

 

Cullen watched on in complete terror! She was injured! Her enemy was closing in on her, faster than he could reach her, _he couldn’t-_

 

 

Mira leapt up, using all the power in her legs to topple him over, knocking his sword out of his grasp in the process. Quick as she could, Mira straddled his waist, using her momentum to drive both her daggers through his shoulders… pinning him to the ground.

 

 

“You think you can threaten me? You think you can come to my hold, to my Inquisition and take the only family I care about to get to ME?!” she spat into his face, Rigel cried out when she twisted each dagger, making sure to get right in the join so he was trapped.

“FUCKING BLOOD BITCH! - *Smack*” Mira had shut him up with a sharp punch to the face, which also and quite accidently knocked him out.

“Well…shit,” she muttered before standing up and searching the area.

 

“YOU! Strip him, tie him up and stuff him in a sack ready for transport back to Skyhold, when we return two guards outside his cell and his wounds healed.”  She ordered to one of Leliana’s scouts before turning to walk over towards Cullen and Alistair.

 

**

 

“Mira, are you alright?” Cullen asked. He watched her fight, watched her struggle against the smite, watch her hand flare and feel his heart clench when she cried out!

 

“Fine, has anyone seen Bull and my brother?” she replied tersely.

 

Cullen paused before answering, quickly checking her over for injuries, he noticed some blood on her arm but couldn’t tell if it was hers but what he did notice was that she was shaking.

“I saw Bull’s lieutenant take your brother and his family back to Skyhold in one of the bandit’s carts.” Alistair explained drawing Cullen’s attention, he was watching her in the same way he had been, eye’s lingering over her curves in a way a stranger like him shouldn’t.

 

 

“Good, good. Strip the camp, I want everything that can be salvaged or sold taken back to Skyhold, strip their dead and repurposed their equipment, burn the bodies with the rest!” she called out the men around her.

She was still shaking, her eye’s darting around, scanning the dead as she tried to sort the faces from those she recognised and those she didn’t.

 

Cullen reached out with his hand, just trying to reassure her, “Do you want to go back to Skyhold and we’ll sort out the rest here?” he asked softly, gently taking her shaking hand into his.

A move that wasn’t lost on Alistair who almost physically deflated at the sight.

 

“No, I want to help here. Rigel liked to keep souvenirs from his… well he was a fucking hoarder.” She paused, shaking her head in the middle of her sentence as if to will an intrusive thought away.

 

Mira started to move away, her hand sliding slowly from his own as he watched her raise herself tall and proud to address the steadily growing group of prisoners. She was pushing him away, they both knew it…

 

“You, where’s Rigel’s tent?” she ordered, gesturing to the mostly uninjured man currently bound and kneeling on the ground. The man looked up and sneered,

 

“I remember you blood bitch, I remember fucking that pretty cunt of yours, got you nice and wet to! You made such pretty noises when you choked on my cock.” The man grinned, Mira remembered him with a brief flicker of disgust.

 

“Oh you, how could I forget.” She smiled wildly, her slightly manic expression caused the man to mistake her mocking grin as an opportunity. He went to speak again, but the words wouldn’t come. As quick as a lightning strike, Mira unsheathed her blade, spun it once in her hand and buried it into the side of his head.

“Sorry what was that? I didn’t quite catch what you were going to say?” she mocked pulling her blade free and moving on in a scarily calm manner.

 

Both Alistair and Cullen watched on, neither of them had seen her reach for the knife. They only saw the limp body sag to the ground as Mira moved to the next man.

“You, where is Rigel’s tent?” she asked again, crouching down to eye level, this time with her knife dripping with blood.

 

“There! Down there!” the man answered quickly. Pointing in a panic to a large tent just away from them.

Mira nodded as she stood, turning away from the group of prisoners silently.

 

“Inquisitor? W-What shall we do with the prisoners?” one of the scouts asked nervously.

 

No one had ever seen the Inquisitor act like this before, devoid of all emotion bar rage and spite. The smile that she wore to hide from the world, to assure everyone around her was gone. If they didn’t know any better, Cullen would have said she’s possessed, a demon of Rage in the place of his lover.

Mira stopped, her whole body still before she slowly turned to face the scout. The poor boy looked about ready to piss himself from the look the Inquisitor gave him.

 

“What Prisoners? _My_ Inquisition does not take pity on Rapists.” She growled turning towards the bound men who were starting to beg for their lives.

She paused for a second when she looked back at the scout, seeming to register the terror, and fear she was causing the poor boy before she softened minutely.

 

“I will make this official.” She sighed softly, motioning for one of the scouts to grab some paper. Cullen continued to watch, she forced herself to calm on the outside… an act for her people… an act that didn’t fool him, she was burning. Anger and hatred just barely contained under her fingertips.

 

“I, Mira Trevelyan. Herald of Andraste and leader of the Inquisition, accuse these men of Rape, Murder, and Kidnapping. With overwhelming evidence, I Inquisitor Trevelyan sentence these men to death.” She paused making sure both her soldiers and her prisoners heard the judgement.

“Your orders stand. Salvage their equipment and burn the bodies. Whether their alive or not when they burn is up to you.” Mira finished as she continued glaring at their prisoners.

 

“Understood Inquisitor.” The scout bowed, now that they knew the crime, that they had their orders, they would follow.

 

 

Cullen watched as Mira turned back towards her goal, ignoring the calls for mercy coming from the men on their knees. He saw the look in her eyes when she passed him without a word. They were glazed with contempt, hatred for the men who hurt her and that hatred was quickly coming to a head, as the men shouted and pleaded for her.

With a quick word, Cullen ordered the men shot first before they burned, so as to quieten them quicker. A small mercy compared to what he wanted to do to them… what he could imagine Mira doing to them if she had the chance.

 

**

 

 

“Do you think she’s going to be alright?” Alistair asked suddenly once Mira was out of sight, they were stripping the camp together.

“I hope so, I’ve never seen her like this…. Did you get to know her well while you two were at the approach?” Cullen asked with a hint of curious jealousy in the question.

 

“A little bit, she is a remarkable and stunning woman. It’s good to see someone looking out for her.” He smirked suggestively, nudging Cullen’s shoulder.

“It’s hard not to, she is… well, _she’s Mira.”_ Cullen simply said, his face breaking in a small smile at the thought of her. But he was worried, really worried, it was painfully obvious she wasn’t herself. He wanted to help in any way he could and if that meant stripping the Camp he would do it without question, but it did feel as if she was pushing him away... again.

 

“That she is.” Alistair agreed wholeheartedly, even after the limited time he’d spent in her company he knew exactly what Cullen was talking about.

 

“So, after you lot have sorted things out with the Wardens, I was hoping I could stay on. Maybe help out with training some soldiers, with your permission of course.” He continued, hoping that Cullen would take him up on his offer.

“We’d welcome the help, I’d welcome the assistance with the troops and the Inquisitor will value your help as well.” Cullen replied as he inspected a supply crate. _Food and essentials, weapons and spare armour… there’s Lyrium around somewhere… better have some of the mages check it for corruption._

 

“Thanks for that. Whatever you need, whether it be training troops or missions, I’m your man.” Alistair smiled with a friendly but humorous mock salute.

 

Cullen chuckled at the other man, it brought him back… before the tower, they’d been recruits together for a few years, friendly but never close.

“Glad to see you haven’t changed.” He smirked.

 

“Glad to see you’ve found a good home… Curly-Cully.” Alistair finished with a tease, he was trying to lighten the mood.

 

Cullen froze, it had been so many years since someone called him that. For a short moment, he felt like a kid again, as gangly, and light-hearted… just for a moment.

 

“I take it back. You can go work in the stables.” Cullen retorted dryly, his scar tugging up his lip as he tried not to smile. Alistair laughed back before the pairs attention drew them elsewhere.

 

 

Someone screamed, a furious and bitter cry… a woman's voice strangled with rage. Followed by the sound of breaking wood. Alistair looked at Cullen in worry, they knew that voice.

Then came the thundering hooves of a charging horse, coming closer and closer. They saw her, Cullen’s Goddess of Fire, charging through the Camp on the back of her Ferelden Forder, red hair loose from its braid and streaming in the wind. But it was her face that worried both men, Cullen thought she’d been angry before… but now… now she was embodying his nickname for her.

And like the fire, she was going to burn, and incinerate anyone who got in her way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want to say, Thank you to everyone who's read this and left wonderful comments so far! You are all wonderful and you make me smile!


	22. And burn away their memory.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mira confronts Her monster.  
> A loses parts of herself in the process.
> 
> Warnings for - Mentions of past Rape and Assault. Violence. Angst and Anger issues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again heads up guys, the this chapter not going to be pretty. But it wraps up the mini revenge arc we've been on.  
> This chapters a bit of a 'give and take', to get to the 'give' we've had to 'take'.
> 
> Warnings for - Mentions of past Rape and Assault. Violence. Angst and Anger issues.

Chapter 22 - And burn away their memory.

 

 

**

Mira wandered through the camp, examining the dead Templars. Their faces brought back memories which she’d rather forget…

_That one broke her arm when he pinned her to the floor, that one raped her while saying another woman’s name, that one would always kick her when he walked by._

 

It took a while but eventually she found her way to Rigel’s tent after recognising the way that bastard crest hanging over the side of his tent. Mira paused for a moment, she didn’t want to be here but she had to do this. This man, this monster took everything that made her, _Her_ , he stole her very will to live. He kept her captive for weeks, chained to his bed every night and when she got back to Ostiwick her Father hired this man to continue ‘guarding’ her, knowing full well the things he would do to her at night.

 

Slowly and slowly her fists tightened, her jaw set into a frim line as her face contorted with a mixture of disgust and rage as she entered the tent. She had to take a few minutes to adjust to the lighting, sunsets here was always bright, the sun just at the wrong angle… that’s when she heard it. The scared whimper and the rattle of chains.

 

“Hello? Is there anyone there?” she asked, blinking a few times to adjust faster.

 

There was another noise, sounding like a choked off sob as Mira moved further into the tent and then Mira saw it. A girl no older than 17 years old, chained to the centre pole, exhausted, hurt and scared out of her wits!

 

“Hey, Hey. My name is Mira; I’m the Inquisitor. I’m not going to hurt you, we’re here to help.” Mira spoke quickly but clearly. She had been in the same position before, she had been this girl.

“T-the Master he’ll be back, he always comes back- Please, please you have to help me.” The woman begged, pulling on the chains desperately.

“You’re talking about Rigel? Knight captain Rigel?” Mira asked, using her finger to draw the line of his scar down her face and the girls terrified look said it all, “He won’t be coming back, he won’t be hurting anyone else, ever again. I’ll make sure he pays.” She promised the girl as she moved to grab her lock picking set from inside her jacket.

“What’s your name?” she asked as she fiddled with the lock.

 

“Alice. My name is Alice.” The girl replied quietly. “You’re really here to help?” she asked, almost a whisper.

 

“Yes. I really am. Now I’m going to take you to one of my scouts, they’ll take you back to Skyhold where a healer will examine you for wounds, you’ll be given as much food and drink as you want and then we’ll look about contacting someone if you want. Is that alright with you?” Mira asked as she unlocked the chains, letting Alice’s hands down gently.

“T-that’s yes! Thank you, thank you so much!” Alice gasped, the words almost getting stuck in her throat from the rush of relief she felt.

 

“One last thing, you were in here a lot. Is there a place Rigel would keep important things? Small things, like jewellery?” she asked as she helped Alice off the floor, sliding her arm around her waist to support her.

“In the chest over there, he kept a small lock box that might be what you’re looking for.”

 

With that Mira hurried to find one of her scouts, giving quick orders to take this woman to Skyhold and have her looked after, inform Leliana and have her make inquiries, gently. No reason to put this woman through more discomfort.

 

“My lady Inquisitor. Report, the prisoners are being burned as we speak. Sister Nightingale requested that a few be brought back to Skyhold for questioning, she will finish your orders after she’s extracted her information, she says their leader is still unconscious but he is being held separately from his fellows. Your horse is ready for you when you are milady.” Another scout informed before bowing quickly and moving to help with the young woman.

 

 

Mira thanked her absently before heading back into the tent. Rigel had stolen something from her, from among the myriad of trinkets she had collected over the years, something more valuable than all the prizes she’d earned or ‘borrowed’… her wedding ring.

She had to wait a moment for her eyes to readjust _again_ , that bastard really should light some candles. Mira started to search the chest where the woman said to and quickly found the small lock box she referred to.

 

 

Whipping out her lock picks she had that lock cracked in no time, _could have been a master thief if I wanted._ She quickly turned out the box onto Rigel’s desk and started to rummage. Signet rings, gold necklaces, some weird looking sex thing _ew_ … No ring.

No.

No.

It must be here, it had to be! Rigel, he stole it from her, tore it from her finger when they kidnapped her.

 

Mira started to search around then tent… then tear around the tent… she was frantic, then she was angry. With a feral yell she flipped the flimsy camp bed Rigel used, tearing a hole straight through the side of the tent.

It wasn’t here, her ring wasn’t here!

She had to know what happened to it. Maker she was going to kill this man; she was going to make him suffer. This man was a monster, a monster who deserved the wrath that was coming to him.

 

**

 

The ride back to Skyhold was quick. Mira pushed her horse to its limit the whole ride, charging, racing past her soldiers on the road. She continued charging through the gates of Skyhold, not stopping for the crowds, she continued pushing her horse through, barking at the passers-by to _make way!_

 

She didn’t stop pushing her poor steed until she was at the prison steps, dismounting and quickly ordering one of the passing guards to bring the spymaster and keep all others away until told otherwise.

Mira was on a mission, steeling herself by being harsh, by pushing everything and everyone away. She wasn’t just going to kill someone, nowadays she kills on a near daily basis. No, no, no… she was going to _torture_ someone, break them apart piece by piece. _She didn’t care if she broke herself in the process._

 

 

“Inquisitor. Your prisoners are being questioned already, there is really no need for you to be here.” Leliana spoke quickly as Mira powered through the prison.

“What have you gotten from them so far?” Mira questioned sharply, not slowing her pace for the other woman as she marched down the stairs into the depths of Skyhold.

 

“Nothing much yet, a few have admitted contact with the Red Templar’s leader, Samson. So far it appears they were working freelance, heading to one of the enemies’ encampments. Their leader has recently awoken, are you sure you want to do this, you don’t exactly appear to be in the best frame of mind right now.” Leliana spoke, quietly at the end, as if she was worried, as if she cared.

 

Mira’s gut rolled, Leliana. Worried for her? Maker how far gone was she right now?

Could she do this?

 

Yes.

 

Yes, she could, she could tear apart the man, the tormentor, the _monster_. She could do it as easily as breathing. What she couldn’t do was look at her friends, watch the fear, the worry, or _Pity_ in their eyes as they watched _her._

“Inquisitor?” Leliana asked, it was then Mira realised she had stopped. She was standing in front of the door to the main prison, Leliana behind her… enemy ahead.

 

“Thank you. That will be all.” Mira responded coldly, placing her hand on the handle to the prison.

“Inquisitor, I really don’t think you should do this.” Leliana protested.

 

“Leliana, I’d thank you to keep your comments to yourself. You have no idea what this man has done, the horrors he has committed not just to myself but to others as well, people I’ve cared about, people I’ve loved. I don’t enjoy this; I don’t want to do it but I have to. So, I’d thank you not to get in my way and not to let anyone else in here. I need to do this _alone_.” Mira spoke, she was quiet. Steeled and hardened.

 

Leliana was surprised, she had never seen this type of behaviour from their Inquisitor. Without another word she let her by, seeing to her requests without any further questions. Leliana understood, she knew what Mira had to do. This went beyond the Inquisition for her, beyond what role she had been forced into.

Mira headed further in, ignoring the yells of torment and the insults her few prisoners hurled at her through iron bars.

The soft thud of her boots hitting the ground heralded her arrival. Guards saluted as she passed, never wavering in their duty.

 

“I’ll need the following; a bowl, one fire flask, my tool kit from my quarters and a handful of rags. Oh, and a pitcher of wine and once they are delivered do not let anyone else in until I give the order. Thank you.”

 

The guards nodded silently and went about their orders, first unlocking the door and letting Mira enter quietly.

 

**

The room was dark, light only barely trickling in from the vent in the ceiling and a small lit brazier. Rigel was strung up, hanging up chains from the ceiling, limp, only barely conscious. His armour had been removed along with his shoes.

Her daggers had been removed from his shoulders, cleaned, and placed neatly on a wooden table in the corner. He had been bleeding freely from his wounds before someone did a half-arsed attempt at patching up. The stench of elfroot hung in the air, along with the metallic tinge of blood on the damp stone.

 

“So, you finally came for me, did you _girl_?” Rigel spoke, that dark chuckle that underpinned his words sent and uncomfortable wave of nausea through her.

Mira was silent, she was still waiting for her supplies. So, without a word she brushed off the dirt she had acquired on her ride home and at down in the only chair in the cell.

 

“Is that what you’re going to do _girl_? Sit on your laurels and wait for some big strong git to come and do your work for you? Isn’t that what you’ve always done _girl?_ What was that pups name again? You know the one we slaughtered, oh you were so sad when we killed him! Do you remember the way he struggled, fought against my blade to get to you?” The Knight-Captain cackled.

 

Mira sat their silently. She remembered… vividly. She remembered the way her Mage fought for her, she remembered the mighty snap of his staff breaking. The blood pooling on the floor. The tears in his eyes. His voice.

 

“OI! GIRL, YOU LISTENIN TO ME!?”

Mira snapped her head up to meet his gaze, Rigel just laughed at her. He knew he was getting to her.

 

“I said do you remember Rivain? That time we found you in that whore house. You and ‘what’s her’ face all naked and supple in bed, I enjoyed watching your arse bounce as you ran from us. Didn’t even have to kill anyone that time! Not like Orlais, you remember? We killed that group of peasants you were hiding with. The young, the elderly?”

Mira steeled her face again and went about idly picking the blood off her fingers whilst they waited for her tools.

 

Rigel just grunted, seemingly tired of his attempts to rile her up.

 

Eventually the guards came back with her items and quietly laid them out for the Inquisitor.

“My lady the Commander and Warden arrived back in the hold and were looking for you. They seemed concerned about your safety, I told them you were here but you were not to be disturbed. They still seem worried.” The guard whispered, wary of letting their prisoner overhear their conversation.

“Of course, they are. If they do come down here before I’ve finished, tell them I’m not to be disturbed and I’ll see them later. That will be all.” Mira whispered back with a firm nod before closing the door after them.

 

“So, girl, have all your tools? Your questions? Are you ready girl?”

“Oh, I’m ready, but first some questions if you’ll be so kind,” Mira began with her back to him, pouring a glass of wine for herself as she inspected her tools. _All in order_. “You hunted me for years. Why? What did my father offer you?”

“Offer me? Oh, he offered me lots of things. Gold, riches, all the whores a man could possibly want!” Rigel laughed shaking his head so that his shaggy dark hair fell forwards to hide his eyes for a moment.

“I hunted you because my superior asked. My Knight-Commander, you remember him? That old fat fucker you were meant to marry? He would have been good to you too, always had a soft spot for young girls and the power your family offered us would have ensured your safety with him. But then you went and ran away. You ruined our plans and so I had to chase. It was more a formality than anything.” Rigel spoke conversationally as if he didn’t have a care in the world, as if Mira wasn’t preparing the most painful way to undo him.

 

“A formality,” she bit back a laugh. “Is that what you call tormenting me for eight years?” she hissed, dragging a blade across the metal table to make a horrid hiss.

 

“Oh, always so dramatic girl. I didn’t torment you for eight years, I sent my men to do most of the leg work and only travelled if the lead was good enough. See I had a pretty wife back home who just loved my cock, couldn’t stay away for long.”

 

“You were married?”

“Oh yes, pretty young thing. Had fiery red hair like yours! She died while I was off chasing you, then the knight-commander died and you see that-   _That_ ’s when it became personal.” He growled, venom dripping from his lips.

“You see I wasn’t home to save them; I was off hunting **you** through the scum of Thedas! I could have saved my wife, saved my friend if I had stayed with them. But I wasn’t, so I swore I would find you and I would  have you. Your father agreed. Once you had served your purpose, you were going to be my pretty little slut and I was going to be Knight-Commander of Ostiwick.”

 

“Oh, is that so? I was going to be yours, was I? It seems you couldn’t wait to replace me after all this happened.” She spat referring to the girl she found in his tent. Alice.

“That girl was nothing more than another job, didn’t even touch her. See nothing could compare after I’d tasted your pretty cunt. Oh, me and my boys missed you terribly Mira, you used to be so much fun!” Rigel laughed loudly, the chains holding him shaking with the effort.

 

“You used to take it so well, slung over a barrel or tied up by the campfire, bare assed and tits slapping. By the void how you howled for it! Why don’t you _howl_ for it some more little girl?”

 

Mira’s already fragile composure snapped, the small blade she had been holding idly in her hand suddenly found its purpose again as she slashed a shallow cut across the knight captain’s ribs.

“Ah! You fucking bitch.” He spat in anger. The wound wasn’t that deep, it barely bled but it was long and that’s when the idea came to her.

 

“Now is that anyway to speak to the leader of the Inquisition? The Herald of Andraste?” Mira mocked, moving back to the table to pour herself another glass of wine.

“If you’re the Herald of Andraste then I’m the fucking elf that ran with her!”

 

Mira just laughed and _slowly_ drew a few more lines across Rigel’s chest with the knife before pouring the last of her wine across his chest, listening to him hiss and growl at the stinging pain.

 

“Oh, does that hurt, here let me get you something for that.” Mira mocked, as she snatched a glass of fire off the benchtop. In a series of fluid and quick movements Mira had, uncorked the bottle, coated her blade, and swiftly added to the slashes already printed across the chained man’s chest. Deepening them, listening to the skin crackle and pop as the flames did their work… the strange smell of cooked pork and blood rushed to her nose as Rigel screamed louder.

 

“ _YOU FUCKING BITCH!_ I should have fucked you harder, broken your legs and left you crippled-ARGGH!” Mira cut him off by throwing a splash from the flask at him, watching as it seared along his hip and thigh as he screamed again.

“Sorry you were saying? Something about sex, it’s always sex with you? Did mummy not love you enough is that it? Got to take it out on other women?” she taunted, she was starting to become frenzied.

The blood, his screams, his pain. It was all splashing fuel to her fire.

 

 

She had to take a breath, calm herself from getting too giddy before she asked her next question.

“You stole many things from me Rigel, but there’s one thing in particular I want back. My wedding ring, where is it?”

 

Rigel laughed, his head was hanging out in front of him, blood tricking down burnt and cracked flesh.                                                                                                                                                            

 

“Stupid fucking bitch, sold that worthless piece of trash to some wenches at a tavern for a blowjob and a pint of ale. Still not as good as your pretty mouth _Mira._ ”

He said her name…

 

She paused.

 

This whole time he hadn’t said her name… it made her sick to her stomach. She could handle being _girl, blood bitch_ or whatever horrid taunt he could call her. But her name? He had no right, **no right to speak her name!**

 

She darted forwards, jumping up into the air slightly with the momentum to smash her fist into the bridge of his nose.

 

 _“YOU DON’T GET TO CALL ME THAT!”_ she screamed darting back to grab her daggers and drop low into an attack stance, “YOU DON’T DESERVE TOO EVEN BREATHE! Every fucking breath you take in my presence is a gift, and I  WILL take them all away-“

 

“Mira Trevelyan,” He started with a laugh, “You are nothing more than a broken whore. Your Family knew it, your Inquisition knows it, even your fucking Dog Lord knew it, why else would a mage marry someone like you. It was cause he knew he couldn’t get anything better than you, you fucking WHOR-“

 

                                                                                                                                         

The voice was cut; Mira had struck him. Provoked by his vicious words, by what he did. She stuck her dagger deep into his chest.

 

 

They both were stunned. Time seemed to slow for a few ticking moments as they both stared at the blade before it suddenly started again with a hacking cough. Rigel was coughing up blood now, the blade had torn through one of his lungs. _He was dying._

 

“no, no, no, no. It’s too quick, too quick. You were meant to suffer; you were meant to pay! You can’t go dying like this! It’s too quick!!” Mira repeated frantically as she tried to stem the bleeding from his chest with her hands. Torn between saving him to hurt him again or just letting him die now.

 

The blood was spilling down her elbows now, dripping off her armour and splashing in a steady drip onto the floor, she was frantic, **_manic_**! Her hands tugging and pawing at the knight-captain’s chest before eventually she started hitting him in anger.

 

“You weren’t meant to die yet! You can’t die yet!” she yelled at him, Rigel only laughed and continued to cough up more blood.

 

The wound continued to spill out blood, she must have nicked an artery or a vein or something! He was dying! He was dying and she hadn’t even started!

 

“At least I’ll die getting to see your pretty face my little whore,” he was growing pale, slurring with his words. “My pretty whore. You’ll always be mine Mira, always.”

Then he smiled, he actually fucking smiled! She slapped him, clawed at his face trying to wipe that smirk, that grin off his face. The light slowly slipped from his eyes, his body fell limp against the chains.

 

Dead.

 

Dead...

                                                                                                                              

Mira’s world turned white, static screaming in her ears.  She lost all concept of time and place, only rage and bitterness remained. She was screaming, the dagger in her hand was punching into his chest over and over and over again.

The blood was everywhere, by this point she was making mince of what used to be a man. He killed so many! Hunted her for so long! And he had the audacity to call her _HIS?!_

 

There were arms around her waist, pulling her backwards. The daggers were still implanted in his chest, she had to let go as the force pulled her away. Her voice was hoarse, something was dripping from her face. She didn’t know if it was blood or tears.

Someone was talking to her, holding her as she struggled.

 

_Killer_

_Rapist_

_Monster_

_… and dead._

 

The person holding her was yelling something, one strong arm around her waist as they sat, cradled. Strong, armoured, soft ruff… male. Cullen, he wasn’t supposed to see her like this. No, he wasn’t supposed to see how broken she was. Maker Rigel was right, Finn only loved her because no one else would take him.

 

 

Maker end me now.

_Broken. Little. Whore._

 

 

 

“Mira, Mira talk to me. What do you need? _Please_.” Cullen was whispering, keeping his voice low as not to startle her.

She felt someone pull her hands out from where they were curled up against her chest, she was shaking, her hands covered in blood.

Alistair, that’s who was holding her hands. Using a soft warm cloth to wash away the blood and revel her broken knuckles. _Did she punch Rigel?_ She had broken two finger nails which were also bleeding. _How far gone was she?_

 

“I – I – I _killed him_.” She whispered shakily. “I couldn’t stop. I couldn’t-” She choked out frantically, she started to struggle again. They were not meant to be here. Not meant to know about this.

“Mira, breathe. Just breathe.” Alistair told her firmly, pulling her hands slightly so he had her attention.

 

“I need to- I need to” _to what? She needed to do something, she didn’t know what._

“You need to calm down Mira. You need to breathe, come on just take a few deep breaths.” Cullen whispered in her ear, his voice breaking through her panic to calm her slightly.

 

Slowly she started to take a deep breath.

“Good. Now out.” Alistair instructed calmly, he was rubbing his thumbs in circles on the insides of her wrists. She exhaled slowly and started to take another breath under their guidance.

Both men waited patiently with her whilst she calmed enough to stop shaking.

 

“Are you injured?” Cullen asked slowly, she was covered in blood, it was hard to tell if some of it was hers.

“I don’t know. I don’t think so.” She replied quietly. She was dying for a drink, something to sooth and numb her sore throat. Cullen looked over to Alistair quickly and nodded.

“We’re going to get you back to your quarters now Mira, is that alright?” Cullen told her, shifting slightly to get a better purchase.

Mira nodded numbly before complying, being helped up to her feet and shuffled through what seemed like the endless walk to her tower.

 

**

 

Mira was numb. Both Alistair and Cullen were flittering about, asking her gentle questions, talking to servants. Eventually someone pressed a glass of water into her hand which she drank quickly before slowly moving to her desk to pull out a bottle of something strong the Bull had given her when they met and poured that into the glass.

She only managed to take one sip from the cup before she coughed, _it was bloody strong_ , and Cullen came and took it off her. Replacing the cup with one of water.

 

“You don’t have to be here you know.” Mira snapped irritably, that remark was meant for Cullen. To scold him from averting her attempts to get drunk but when she looked up only Alistair was in the room. _How long had she been sitting here?_

 

“We know. But we care so we’re staying.” Alistair replied airily as he sat on the couch, busying himself with cleaning his sword. It got some use earlier.

Mira sighed and sank back on the edge of the bed. Cullen had gone downstairs to bring up some hot water for a bath when he noticed Mira picking at the blood on her arms after she peeled off her armour. She was currently sitting in an old pair of leggings and baggy shirt, neither of which she cared about ruining.

 

“Sorry.” She mumbled quietly.

“Nothing to be sorry for Mira. Want to talk?” Alistair asked without pressure. His tone was as light as it was before, he wouldn’t judge.

 

“I don’t know where to begin.”

“Why did you kill him? Why did it upset you so?” he asked.

“He wasn’t meant to die so soon.” Mira muttered.

 

Cullen came back into the room quietly with the buckets of water for the bath.

“What do you mean?” Alistair continued

 

Mira stalled for a moment, taking another sip from her glass before heading over to Cullen who was filling the bath. His armour was off, coat set off over the railing.

 

 

“I- He- Rigel, he was a monster. I wanted to make it last. Make him pay for all the people he murdered, for what he did to me. I had it all planned out and I – and I ruined it. He started talking about Finn, about me and I… the knife. I stabbed him in his chest, I wanted him to stop, I needed him to stop talking,” she had stalled again, freezing in the middle of the room. Halfway between Cullen and Alistair.

 

“He deserved to die! He deserved to suffer! He hunted me for years, never let me settle anywhere, never let me live a normal life! He killed so many to get me, he killed my Finn, my husband. He kidnapped me, raped me and then he said that after my Father had finished using me that he was going to keep me. That I **always** belonged to him!” she was getting angry again, that rage just pricking under her fingers before it fizzled out.

She was tired, she was hurt and she wanted this to be finally over.

 

“You don’t belong to anyone Mira. Least of all that monster. You did the right thing, there was no point in extending it. You would only have wound up hurting more… trust me on that.” Alistair responded with a heavy breath as he stood up from the couch.

He strode over to her with steady, determined steps and opened his arms wide. He pulled her close, giving her that tactile comfort she craved as she tucked herself under his chin.

 

“You are strong, beautiful, intelligent and by far the most amazing woman I’ve met. And you belong to you. Nobody else. You are in charge and no matter what I – We’ll be here for you as friends as support as whatever you need us to be.” He continued holding her tight. Trying to comfort her, he felt like he was dangling his heart in an archers’ sights as he glanced over at Cullen who was wearing an oddly surprised expression before nodding firmly at him.

 

 

“Thank you. Both of you.” Mira whispered as she slowly stepped out of after Alistair placed a fond kiss to her forehead.

“Happy to be useful, I’m gonna leave you with Cullen now and go see if I can help Leliana downstairs. You take it easy Mira; I’ll see you in the morning alright?”

Mira nodded softly as she felt Cullen take her hand softly and lead her towards the bath.

 

 

Mira started to shrug off her shirt and Cullen quickly averted his eyes, turning slightly to give her some privacy which Mira caught onto as soon as the shirt cleared her head. She stood there in her leggings, holding her old shirt against her breasts to preserve her modesty as she reached out for Cullen’s hand again.

He stiffened slightly before slowly peering over his shoulder cautiously. _Did she want her here? Was he welcome anymore?_

 

 

“Cullen, can you? – can we? -,” she started trying to word the sentence correctly, Cullen squeezed her hand to reassure her and she sighed again, “That. Can you stay? Can you-“she broke herself off again and glanced at the bath and Cullen figured out what she was trying to get out.

 

Wordlessly he started to undress and Mira nodded as she finally looked down at herself. Her arms were covered in dried blood, some of it splashed against her chest and collar. She glanced up at the mirror hanging above her wardrobe and saw the splashes of blood across her right cheek and how her hair had come undone, long red strands hanging loose, some still admirably trying to cling to the braid she tied it in before.

She was a mess, tear tracks through the dirt on her face. Cullen placed a hand on her lower back, a gentle pressure and guided her into the water.

 

 

Cullen was stepping in behind her having left his underwear on as he sat and drew her into his lap. The bath was only slightly cramped but it allowed Mira to curl up slightly in Cullen’s lap, her cheek resting on his shoulder as her legs bent slightly to draw her knees up into a ball.

Cullen was quiet, just idly cupping the warm water over her shoulder to keep her warm and running his fingers down her arms to clean away the blood and dirt. Eventually he idled away enough time and carefully propped her up to clean her face with gentle strokes of his thumbs.

Mira looked at him, he seemed set on his task. Carefully looking after, her, soft determination set across his brow. She had been limp in his grasp until now, she reached up with a now clean hand to slide along his jaw.

 

He looked surprised for a moment before he melted into the touch, leaning into her as he wiped the last of the dirt from her face.  Mira waited for his thumb to finish its final stroke before she leaned in to find his lips.

Soft, cautiously they met. Cullen was hesitant to engage her, to push her and Mira nervous, scared he didn’t want her anymore now he knew she was so damaged. Slowly Cullen pulled back from the timid kiss as Mira rested her forehead against his, her eyes were closed, her teeth tugging on her lower lip.

 

“We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to Mira. I’m here, I’m here for as long as you want me to be.” He assured stroking her back slowly.

Mira chuckled slightly, more of a sort of snort really.

“And to think, it was only this afternoon that I was wet and waiting for you.” She joked referring back to before they got the note that Rigel had taken her brother. _A joke, a distraction_ , he thought idly.

 

Cullen just smiled, she was joking again and now smiling again. He laughed softly, wrapping his arms around her to hug her close again, placing his chin on her shoulder so he could breathe her in.

“Maker take me, you are perfection.” He sighed blissfully, she may be hurting, she may be upset but if he could help, if he could make her smile. He would spend all of his time, his love, his affections on making her happy.

“Sweet-talker.” She smirked into his neck. Her fingers finding their way into his damp hair.

 

“ _No, just hopelessly in love with you.”_ He sighed fondly, still idly stroking her hair.

 

Mira froze for a moment and then started to peel herself away from him.

 

 _What did he do?_ He wondered, _he said…Oh._ _Oh no._ His heart sank as she pulled away from him. She doesn’t love him; he was only a _momentary_ diversion. He read way too much into this, sat fantasising about her when he was meant to be writing reports. Maker what had he done.

 

“You’re… in love with me?” she asked slowly. Cullen didn’t know what to do, it was a terrible time to tell her! He should have waited, brought flowers! Wine! Oh, Maker what a fool he was to think a wonderful woman like her would ever want anything to do with him!

“I-I-I…” He stuttered nervously, his eyes fixed to the rim of the bath.

 

“Why? Why would you say that, we’ve been together for one night! Is it because of-? How- What-”

 

“Mira, if I’ve offended you. I’m truly sorry. I should have waited; this was, horribly insensitive timing on my part. I’m sorry.” Cullen apologised, removing his hands to place them on his own thighs out of the way.

“Waited? You’re being serious, you’re in love with me?” she asked slowly, nervously even!

 

Cullen frowned in confusion before awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck.

“I… yes, yes I am. In love with you that is.”

“Oh!” she squeaked suddenly, her hands covering her mouth when she realized the noise she made. Cullen was surprised and now even more confused, was this welcome? Did she love him too? Did she hate him? Did she want him to leave? She was staring at him, eyes wide and body curled in to make her look small.

 

“Mira?” he asked gently, he needed some guidance here, he didn’t know what in the void to do.

“I-I-I- _Cullen._ ” She breathed quickly, she was panicking torn between what she wants and what he needs to understand.

“T-Take your time.” He assured in a shaky breath. _Maker his heart was hammering out of his chest. This was it. She would turn him down. Send him away. Too forward, too stupid._

 

She nodded slowly,

 

“Alright, well… I think I lo- _fuck me,_ this is difficult! Sex, sex with you is wonderful, it’s toe curling and magnificent because I’m not the Inquisitor there, It’s just you and me and you make me feel, Maker I  love how you make me feel… But the problem is, if I say the words, if I commit to this idea, then everything here becomes real!”

She was talking so fast, so frantically, her hand gesturing wildly between them, so much so that Cullen was having a hard time keeping up.

“I killed the last person I committed to! Do you understand that? It was my fault Cullen, they used him to get to me! What’s to stop that from happening again? I was nobody then, and now I’m Inquisitor?! I don’t want to hurt you, and I don’t want you to be hurt because of my actions as Inquisitor.”

 

“Mira, I’m Commander of your Forces, I’m a withdrawing Lyrium addict and I was complicit in the Kirkwall rebellion. You enemies are already my enemies and then I’ve got some more. I've always been in some form of danger, I'll survive.” He smiled encouragingly.

 

She watched him, carefully.

 

“You love me?” she asked slowly as she slowly started to accept the idea.                                                                                                                                                                               

“Yes, I do.” He replied hoping to provide the clarification she needed. _Bravery,_ he told himself, _you can do this._

“You love me.” She stated now, a smile creping across her lips, even as she tried to hide it behind her hands in surprise.

“I love you Mira. I never thought I’d be lucky enough to find someone like you, someone as wonderful, as kind and as strong as you. I’ll be whatever you-“

 

“I love you Cullen. I love you more than is rational and that scares me, but by all the gods of all the people, I love you.” Mira confessed, cutting him off even though her hands were still holding her face, in what Cullen now registered as surprise!

 

It was Cullen’s turn to be dumb-founded now. _She loves him too. She loves him!_

 

His body acted faster than his mind as it was still wrapped up in an endless cycle of _she loves me!_ He surged forwards, water sloshing over the sides of the bath as he enveloped her in his arms, pulling her close as he pressed soft fluttering kisses all across her face, listening in delight to her giggles when he tried to nuzzle under her hands still frozen over her cheeks. She laughed moving to slide her hands along his cheeks as she pulled him towards her lips.

 

They kissed with all the ferocity and passion of their first kiss, in the snow outside of haven, maker that felt like a lifetime ago. There was no anger here, only sweet sparkling joy as they frantically pawed at each other, eager to touch as much of the other as possible, almost to reassure each other that they were there, that this was happening.

 

Cullen laughed softly when their noses bumped against each other’s and her wet hair was sticking to his chest. Perfection.

“Mira? Mira?” Cullen laughed between kisses, she pulled back slightly with an almost panting breath to look at him.

 

She looked at him in confusion, her lips were red from the force of their kisses and there was an adorable blush highlighting her cute cheeks hiding the light dusting of freckles.

“What?” she asked finally after Cullen had gotten lost in staring at her.

“Love you,” he blurted out quickly like his brain shorted or something. “and we’re getting water everywhere.” He finished with a smile.

 

She laughed warmly at that, glancing over the sides of the bath were the water had splashed onto the floor boards. She moved to stand but quickly realised she hadn’t finished washing her hair. So, she chuckled making a small noise in realisation as she leant over the rim of the bath to retrieve the small bottle of soap.

“May I?” Cullen asked as she sat back into the water that was growing cooler by the second. Mira smiled, handing over the small bottle before dipping her hair into the water.

 

Cullen smiled at the fact he was helping, slowly massaging the sweet floral smelling soap into her hair _so this is why she smells like Arbour Blessing_. She waited patiently, relaxing into his arms before she slid herself back into the water and ran her hands through her hair.

“Beautiful.” Cullen praised when she came back up.

Mira just laughed, here was this man. This tall, handsome imposing man, who was acting like a smitten boy! Oh, she loved it.

 

“Your turn.” She teased, running wet hands through his hair and getting a humoured sigh in response. He hated the way his hair curled but she loved it.

“If you insist.” He sighed like it was a laborious task but complied, dipping his head under the water and shaking the wax loose before sitting up again. Mira slid herself back into his lap grinning, her hands coming up into his hair to spread the soap through it. His eyes slid shut as she softly massaged his head, finger nails running over his scalp. It was heavenly and then he felt it. Her lips sliding against his. She was soft, giggling against him, squeaking in delight when his hands pulled her closer. She kissed him one last time before pressing on his shoulder, guiding him back into the water.

He shook the suds from his hair quickly, eager to get back to those wonderful lips of hers.

 

She laughed in delight when he came back up quickly to kiss her but she placed her hand on his chest, “Cullen, the water’s getting cold, we should get out.”

He sighed but let her go reluctantly, enjoying the way the water slid down her back before he followed her. Stopping once he’d retrieved a spare towel to remove his soaked smalls and squeeze the excess water back into the bath.

This was nice, domestic even as he went and pulled on his trousers, opting to remain shirtless as he became absorbed with watching Mira standing there in a soft blue dressing gown, brushing her hair out by her mirror. _Much like the morning after their first date._

 

“I can see you watching me serah.” Mira teased, meeting his eyes in the mirror.

“I was thinking about how beautiful you are, how lovely this is and how lucky I am. Luckiest man in Thedas.” He grinned happily, giddily even. He couldn’t get over it, he would never get over it, a creature as perfect as her loves him.

 

“Oh, is that all. Maker once you stop blushing you are a surprisingly smooth man!” Mira smirked turning around to face him now she had finished drying and brushing her hair.

And of course, the moment she mentioned it was the moment his face flushed which caused Mira to giggle and him to flush even further.

 

“I-I’m not that smooth.” He grumbled, rubbing the back of his head, feeling his hair already start to curl.

“That’s alright, I rather like it when you blush, makes me want to kiss you and do… _other_ untoward things to you.” She smirked, her hands slowly sliding up his shoulders as she leant towards him. Tempting him with her pouty lips.

“Oh, is that so?” he smiled moving to grab her hands with his own. That’s when he noticed her injuries, her knuckles were raw and there were a few cuts in her skin, how she didn’t feel them when she was in the bath was beyond him.

 

“Maybe we should take care of you first? There’ll be time for those untoward things later.”

Mira looked down to where Cullen was referring to, finally noticing her cuts and bruises. She had been so angry and so distraught earlier that she didn’t feel them and then she’d flipped and become so overwhelmingly happy because of him.

“Maybe that’s for the best.”

 

They both worked together calmly to apply some ointment and dress her wounds before Mira started to guide Cullen into bed.

“It’s late, it’s cold. Don’t go back to your tower, stay here with me.” She told him following him into bed with a kiss.

“That sounds like a very wise choice.” Cullen agreed with a light nod of his head and a soft smile as her kisses pressed softly against his face. He never wanted to leave this moment, never wanted to leave her warmth.

The pair eventually burrowed their way under the covers, he managed to make himself comfortable against her pillows as Mira curled into his chest, her head on his shoulder. Mira had the thick blanket pulled up over her shoulders as she nuzzled in and Cullen couldn’t keep the smile from his face even if he tried. She still like a mouse, all curled up and safe, he almost expected her to start purring!

 

 “You are mhmm, I love you Mira.” he moaned softly, rolling so he could press his face into her neck so he could inhale her scent. Which also sent Mira in a fit of laughter as his scruff managed to tickle her at the same time but Cullen couldn’t get enough of that sound. Eventually and only after a sharp poke to his ribs did Cullen let go of her new found ticklish spot and allowed her to rearrange the pillows so that they could both lie closer together.

 

Cullen smiled as she tucked herself against his chest, the curve of her arse slotting against his hips, against his cock and if he were a weaker man he would have found himself growing hard at this simple touch. However, he was Cullen Rutherford, Commander of the Inquisitions armies and he would give anything to see the woman in his arms happy and sated and if she needed rest right now, then by the Maker’s sake he would help give that to her.

“Stop thinking. Whatever it is we can sort it out in the morning.” Mira mumbled as she tugged his arm over her waist, effectively cocooning herself in his warmth.

 

Cullen couldn’t help but chuckle at her words, “Well I was thinking about those awfully untoward things you mentioned earlier.” He grinned and kissed the top of her head, making himself comfortable behind her.

“Oh, well we’re defiantly doing that in the morning!” Mira chuckled back, her hand curling into his own, he just laughed again and kissed her.

 

It took them no time at all to return to their sleeping positions, weeks of being apart didn’t change the comfort they found in each other as the mountain of blonde muscle curled himself around his shorter, softer woman. The woman that he loves… the woman that loves him back.

 

Quietly the pair drifted off to sleep, safe and warm in the knowledge that they were loved, _by each other._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did say give and take guys!
> 
> And now hopefully, i will give you more nice things with these two.
> 
>  
> 
> P.S my Uni workload is terrifying, I've got 5, 50% assignments all due in the same week! So there might be a delay with the next chapter, hopefully not! But yeah, Uni, So much Uni.


	23. Interruptions and Reunions.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some fluff, some heartwarming and a little bit of closure.

Chapter 23 – Interruptions and Reunions.

                                                                                                                  

Morning came far too quickly for the two lovers and with the rather distinctive noise of hushed whispers.

_“You wake her up!”_

_“No, you! What if the Commander gets angry? What if **She** gets angry?!”_

_“You’ve got to wake her up, Lady Montilyet said it was important!”_

 

There was a gentle tap on Mira’s hip from Cullen, a test to see whether she was awake or not. Mira responded back with a quick double tap to his chest to signal back, she felt his grin against her neck as somehow in the night they had managed to move positions again. There was a quick tap from Cullen and then a short stroke of his finger, gesturing to where the two messengers stood whispering to each other.

Mira sighed, steadily realising that her intruders weren’t going to leave until they had told her whatever they had come to say. So, with a _massive_ amount of effort, Mira raised her free arm and waved the messenger over with an irritated grunt. _So much effort._

 

“Ah! Lady Inquisitor, Lady Montilyet asked me to deliver this letter to you and to also inform you that Lord Trevelyan and his Wife and Son will be meeting you for Lunch at noon, they are however in the Gardens and the Chantry at the moment if Milady wished to speak to them. There is also a War Council meeting scheduled for this evening Milady.” The young messenger rattled off, ticking off the items on his parchment as he spoke them and placing the letter from Josie on her side-table.

Mira nodded again with a little agreeing groan before that Messenger scuttled off, leaving only one intruder in the room.

 

“What are you doing here?” Mira growled. She was steadily getting rather irritated about her interrupted sleep.

“Uh, Commander. Knight Captain Rylen has given an update on the troop preparations and has also prepared a list of soldiers he wishes to take with him to the Western Approach.” She squeaked hastily scurrying to put the papers on his side table. _Hmm, his side table? Suppose it was now, if he wanted it._

 

“Thank you. Was there anything else?” he asked, seeming to be a lot more coherent than Mira was.

“No Sir, Breakfast is on the table for the both of you.” The woman curtsied finally.

“Good, make sure you lock the door on your way out and instruct the guards not to let anyone else in this morning. Dismissed.” Cullen spoke with an authority that left nothing to question and the girl scurried off to see to her other tasks.

 

With a mumbled praise, Mira attempted to once again capture Cullen’s arm and pull it back around her in a futile attempt to go back to sleep.

“Ah-ah Inquisitor. No going back to sleep now.” Cullen chuckled at the cute ball of sleep that had snuggled under his arm.

“No. Sleeping is good. Go back to sleep.” She purred, settling back down only to be nudged again by Cullen.

 

“But if you go back to sleep, then it would be slightly improper if I did this.” He chuckled again and started to lean in and kiss her neck.

“Mmm you’re a bad, purely evil man Cullen.” Mira groaned as he continued his teasing.

“Mhmm and you are too cute when you’re sleepy.” He smiled, trailing kisses towards her mouth only to be batted away by her lazy hand.

 

“I’m not cute, I’m the Inquisitor, I am fire and death, the bane of the fade, I am not cute!” she mocked half-heartedly, that sly smirk slowly sliding into place across her lips.

 

“Oh of course, my apologies’ my dear Inquisitor. You are indeed the bane of the fade, all of Thedas bows before you and I am but a humble servant and you definitely, _definitely_ don’t have the most adorable bed head right now.” He laughed as he quickly attacked her neck with his lips, causing her to squeak out a laugh as he exploited one of her known ticklish spots.

 

“Okay! I’m awake, please, Cullen! Maker, you have to have a ticklish spot to!” she laughed and squealed as she set to work. Fingers ghosting over his ribs, back, anywhere she thought she might get a reaction. But Cullen was once a Templar and if Templar’s were good at one thing it would be _resisting urges_. She came close to making him crack a few times, particularly when she dug her fingers into the crease of his groin, causing him to jerk forwards in surprise.

 

“So, are you awake now my lovely Inquisitor?” Cullen asked as he propped himself up on his elbow, giving her some space. His hair a glorious array of curls.

“I suppose, if I must.” She sighed feigning a lack of interest but Cullen could see those sharp blue eyes watching him with barely restrained lust.

 

“May I kiss you Mira?” he asked watching her with intrigue. She smiled at him, a sweet curve of her lips that was amused by his question.

“Yes. You may.” She chuckled sliding forwards to seek out his lips.

 

 

“ _Warm, safe, beautiful, loved, he loves her so much, warmth bleeding into him, more beautiful and addictive than the Lyrium, a song sung in the tone of her voice, a balm to keep the nightmares at bay so he can keep her safe in his arms.”_ Coles distant voice suddenly spoke out. So close, it shocked both Mira and Cullen into jolting upright in an attempt to find its source.

 

“ _She is happier now with him, the word Templar stings much less. She loves him, admires him, she won’t make the same mistakes again, protect him, run her fingers through blond curls to sooth the hurt, make things to make him better because she cares, sometimes so much that it frightens her but she wants him. - “_

 

“Cole where are you and how did you get in here!” Mira called out, glancing around the room.

“But the words were so loud, you needed to get them out but you didn’t know how.” He replied, this time from above them. Mira whirled her head around to spot him sitting on that stupid owl statue that sat above her bed.

 

“Cole come down here now.” Cullen frowned, putting on his commanding voice.

“But I was trying to help, you wanted them to know.” The boy spoke back, the confusion evident in his voice as he dropped down onto the floor, following Mira’s hand to perch on the end of their bed.

 

“I know you wanted to help but what did I say about reading peoples thoughts in private.”

“But Doiran says all thoughts are private, if I don’t listen I can’t help!”

 

“Alright how about, you still help but I would appreciate it as a friend that you didn’t listen to people’s thoughts in my quarters, and next time you come in here, let us know so you don’t get an eye full okay?” Mira smiled, moving to hold the boys hand softly.

 

“Okay… But I helped?” he asked looking unsure.

 

“Yes of course you did. Now off you go please.” She smiled reassuringly, letting the young man disappear into thin air.

“Well… That was… something, does he do that often then?” Cullen asked flopping back down into bed now that Cole had gone.

“He does but he’s trying to help and he’s learning, so I don’t mind all that much.” Mira sighed leaning over to place her head on his shoulder, a smile once again tugging at her lips when he curled his arm around her body protectively.

 

 

They lay there lazily for a few moments just enjoying each other’s company, Cullen’s fingers slipped under her loose shirt so he could slowly trace the lines of her tattoo before exploring her lower back and hip. Mira on the other hand was idly running her hand over his chest hair, following it down his chest and stomach.

“You know I believe you were going to do something before we were so rudely interrupted?” Mira prompted leaning up on her elbow to look at him. Cullen smirked remembering his question and more importantly her answer as he started to lean up to her.

 

 

***Bang!***

 

“Inquisitor, you’d better be up by now, you’re late for our sparing session!” Cassandra’s booming voice filled the large room as her heavy footsteps announced her imminent arrival up the stairs.

 

Mira moved quickly, pulling the blankets up over both her and Cullen’s head, shushing him with a finger to his lips that prompted him to remain still. Cassandra reached the top of the stairs and paused, clearly examining the room before stomping over to the bed.

 

“Mira you’ve tried this trick already, it only worked once!” Cassandra exclaimed as she swiftly grabbed the blankets and pulled them back, revealing to her surprise not only the Inquisitor but also their Commander.

“By the Maker! Commander! Cullen, what are-“

 

“Seeker Pentagast… lovely morning, isn’t it? Bit chilly though, could we have the blanket back?” Cullen asked calmly, nonchalantly even, completely in control. Cassandra quickly let the blankets slip from her grasp, practically gaping at the pair cuddled in bed.

 

“How long has this been going on!?” Cassandra demanded with a scowl aimed towards Cullen, “You are together and you didn’t tell me?!” she continued with a well-aimed punch at Cullen’s arm, to which he groaned playfully.

“Since the night Hawke arrived.” Mira supplied helpfully, only to have Cullen’s look of mock betrayal aimed at her.

“A whole month and you didn’t tell me!” she gasped, punching his other arm for good measure.

 

“Ow! Would you stop! I didn’t tell anyone, we were trying to keep this quiet… But I love her.” he finished with a love-struck smile to Mira.

“And I love you.” She smiled back, blushing slightly when Cassandra gasped in awe, covering her own mouth in surprise.

 

“I am glad. I suppose I’ll leave you two in peace, but we are talking about this later Cullen. I can’t believe you didn’t tell me!” Cassandra laughed taking her leave with quick bow.

 

 “See you tomorrow Seeker.” Mira chirped pulling the blankets back up as Cassandra made her hasty escape.

 

 

Cullen watched as Mira sighed in relief when the door finally closed, now free of interruptions he moved quickly. Rolling her so she was underneath him and quickly leaned down to kiss her.

 

Mira was startled at first, confused as to what he was doing but the moment his lips touched her she melted, her hands moving around his shoulders to hold on tight, to keep him kissing her.

Mira’s legs shifted as Cullen settled between them as they tried to get as close as possible. Cullen rocked against her slowly, his hand coming down as he shifted onto his elbows, tracing the curve of her waist up to the swell of her breast, enjoying her soft flesh underneath him.

Their breath grew heated as Mira started to rock back against him, her kisses growing rougher, finishing with a soft touch of teeth to his lower lip every time they broke for air. Her hands tracing down the firm, defined muscles of his back, down hand dipping down to squeeze the muscles of his ass, chuckling softly in delight as Cullen gasped into her mouth.

 

“Mira you-“

 

 

 

 

*Bang bang bang.*

 

“Commander Cullen, Ambassador Monetilea has called for an urgent meeting with Duke Forrester as he is threatening to withdraw all support unless he meets you personally.” Shouted the messenger through the door after realising it was locked.

 

Cullen just let out a long and pitiful groan as he buried his face against her neck before it let out into a strained laugh.

                                                                                                                              

“Can’t we just have five minutes to ourselves.” He groaned, holding her close as he wound his arms around her body, like a child with their favourite teddy bear.

“No rest for the wicked it seems.” She sighed holding him back as she ran her fingers through his hair soothingly.

 

“Well I could just tell this duke to ‘ _piss off’?_ ” Cullen offered jokingly, causing Mira to let out a surprise peel of laughter.

“Commander, are you really that desperate for sex that you’d tell a possible ally of the Inquisition to _piss off?_ ” she giggled happily.

“Yes. No- well I uh. Hey, stop laughing at me!” he lent back to talk to her and managed to get so flustered in his response that somehow the great Commander of the Inquisition turned into a five-year-old.

 

“Steadfast leader of my armies and you’d break alliances just to get into my pants.” She continued humorously, teasing him, and watching as that beautiful blush covers his cheeks.

 

 

“ _Mira,”_ came his exasperated whine.

“I promised I would never harm this Inquisition. But I can’t help it if your lacy under things are just far too tempting for me to think clearly,” he dropped his voice into a growl, the way he knew turned her on…

“When all I want to do is _rut_ into what lays beneath them.” He smirked towards the end, rocking his half hard cock against her teasingly. Even with that blush colouring his cheeks, he was being so delightfully seductive!

 

 

“But Commander, _I’m not wearing any lacy under things_ ” she purred into his ear, finishing with a seductive tug from her teeth which caught Cullen by surprise when he moaned raggedly. Cock twitching against her with interest.

_“Commander, the Ambassador said this was urgent!”_ shouted the messenger again.

“Tell her, I’m on my way!” he shouted back angrily.

“Right away sir!”

 

“To work then?” Mira sighed pushing upwards against his chest, smiling again at how muscular her lover is.

“Certainly, seems that way. Believe me when I say that I’d rather spend all day in bed with you my love.” Cullen sighed, leaning in for one last long kiss.

“Mmm you tease me; I might just have to keep you here if you keep talking like that. Dukes be hanged.” Mira smirked, watching as her lover went about dressing. That strong muscular chest, bending and flexing as he went about finding his clothes. _Mmm so hot._

 

As she watched she started to grin, almost lecherously. She was his and he was hers, her lover, her partner, _hers_. That beautifully stunning man. How did she end up here? Powerful, mildly wealthy, loved? No idea.

 

“I can see you staring at me Mira, shall I pose for you later?” he laughed as he ran his fingers through his hair to tame it.

“Oh yes please.” She laughed finally deciding to get out of bed.

 

Mira went about getting ready for the day. Grabbing her favourite shirt, the slightly softer one with the red scarf. Cullen came over to kiss her cheek once she’d pulled the shirt on, still as giddy as a young recruit.

 

 

“I’m going to go check on Timothy.” She told him, the smile on her face slipping slightly as she weighted the gravity of the situation.

 

“You gonna be alright? I can be there as soon as I’ve dealt with Forrester.” Cullen offered seriously as he held her hand, an attempt to comfort her. She still had the bandaged wrapped around them, they should be alright to come off soon.

“I should be fine; I mean it’s only my brother. My brother who I haven’t seen in 10 years, my brother who wants to give our house’s wealth to the Inquisition. I’ll be fine!” Mira laughed albeit slightly manically. Cullen sighed worriedly, holding her a bit tighter and pulling her in for a kiss.

 

“I’m cancelling my meeting; Rylen can take over.” Cullen decided.

“No no, you have to go sort out this idiot Duke. That’s more important right now. I’m just being silly.”

 

“You’re important Mira and you’re not being silly.” Cullen chided with a frown.

“Cullen, we agreed that _this_ ,” she gestured between the two of them, “Wouldn’t get in the way of the Inquisition. Go see to the Duke and I’ll meet with my brother. I’ll be fine.” She sighed leaning up for a kiss.

 

Cullen accepted, kissing Mira in attempt to reassure her one final time before attempt to pull himself away, he failed rather miserably as Mira pulled him back for a deeper, more joyful kiss to part on a happier note.

“Alright, Alright. Just know, I’ll be there if you need me. I’ll see you at the meeting tonight.” He smiled, sneaking in one last kiss before he finally let her go.

 

 

**

 

Mira headed down to the gardens with a slight nervousness in her step. She was going to see her brother. Well see him and hopefully not fight for their lives but sit have lunch. Just a normal family lunch! She could do this, this was fine! Her stomach wasn’t in knots; her palms weren’t sweating. She was absolutely, completely, and utterly fine!

She came into the hallway leading to the Garden, Josie had sent word that they had been in the Chantry earlier. So, Timothy had found the Maker? Mira wondered if that was his wife’s influence, what did she, what did Annette think of her? Would she like her?

She finally came into the Gardens, taking deep calming breaths as she walked only to be blinded by a knee-high flash of blue velvet.

 

“Joran! Stop running about like a Mabari! Go apologise to that young lady you just barrelled into then come sit down!” the boy’s mother called out without taking her eyes from conversation she was having with the herbalist.

The little boy in question came careening back towards Mira and stopped in front of Mira, an apology ready on his lips before he broke out into a giggle and cried out.

 

“Mama! She’s got hair like Pa’s!” the boy looked up at Mira with wide eyes before making grabby hands in a demand to be picked up.

“Well, you are right about that!” Mira chuckled softly picking up the demanding child and taking him over to his mother. Annette looked up confused as to who was carrying her son over to her and then it must have clicked because the smile the woman gave was so welcoming it made Mira forget about all the silly things she had been worrying about on her way down here.

 

“Hello! You must be Mira. Aren’t you the spitting image of your brother! Timothy’s just in the Chantry. Thank you for coming when you did.” Annette told her in all seriousness. She kept a thick Orlesian accent, still she was dressed sensibly for the weather and wore no mask to hide her face. So obviously not as _odd_ as some other Orlesian’s she’d met.

“Those men… won’t be bothering anyone ever again. I’m just sorry you two got caught up in the middle of it. Are you alright?” Mira asked handing over the young man to his mother who bounced him slightly on his hip.

 

“It was quite an ordeal but we all seem to be on the mend, Joran is particularly enamoured with the man who brought us here and the Quinari. Why don’t you show the Inquisitor what the nice man gave you Joran?” Annette prompted her son who timidly revealed a small Nug toy with wings sewn on the back. _Krem’s work._

“Oh, that’s nice, does it have a name yet?” Mira asked, pulling on a friendly smile for the boy who’d suddenly become shy in the presence of his mother.

 

“Super Puff.” The boy mumbled quietly before hiding his face in his mother’s shoulder while she mouthed, _shy_ to the Inquisitor.

 

Mira smiled to the pair before gesturing that she was going to the Chantry. Mira walked slowly trying to calm her nerves. At least his wife and child were nice, hopefully this meeting would go just a smoothly.

 

“ _Blessed are they who stand before. The corrupt and the wicked and do not falter. Blessed are the peacekeepers, the champions of the just.”_ Rang out the quiet words as Mira came closer. She entered quietly and found her brother sitting on one of the pews facing away from her, his hands clasped in prayer.

 

“Blessed are the righteous, the lights in the shadow. In their blood, the Maker's will is written.” Mira’s spoke finishing the prayer as best she could. It had been years since she’d spoken the chant but she felt the effort was worth it this time.

 

“Mira?” Tim asked, turning his head around to see who it was. His face was still bruised, a broken nose and a deep gash across its bridge. He looked older, more haggard. The bright red hair was diluted with strands of grey along with the stubble on his jaw.

“Surprise?” she offered uncertainly.

 

Tim stood gingerly, balancing his splinted leg while leaning on the pews as he hobbled quickly towards her. He was still taller than her the years hadn’t changed that. He planted his good leg firmly on the ground in front of her and used that to prop himself up as he swept her into a tight hug.

Mira was stunned. Of all the things, she expected to happen today, this would have been around the bottom.  Cautiously she put her arms around her brothers back in return and that’s when she felt him shake.

 

“I’m so sorry. So, sorry Mira.” He told her raggedly, “I didn’t know what he’d done, I believed him when he said you’d been kidnapped. If I had known, I would have- would have. Oh, Maker forgive me Mira, I failed you.”

Timothy was practically sobbing his apologies at her and Mira… she didn’t know what to do. He pulled back suddenly, clinging to her shoulders for support.

 

“Are you safe here? Are you well? Happy? Are you… Maker you’re all grown up.” He told her, his eyes scanning over her face. Considering the last time, she remembered seeing him she was about 14, it was safe to say she grew up.

 

“I’m okay Tim, as healthy as I can be in my position and well… healing.” Mira smiled, it was a quiet smile, sad and melancholy as she answered his questions.

“I swear to you; I didn’t know what that _wretch_ had done. Maker, when Jacob told me… I am so sorry for everything. Jacob went to deal with those brutes! I should have known when he didn’t send word. I’ve already spoken with your Spymistress, she’s sent someone to find him… Jacob said he knew about Father. About what he was doing to you girls, he said that he was trying to protect Fells when she, when died. She was trying to leave her husband and he killed her for trying to leave him, they were in Ferelden at the time, just after the Blight so he blamed it on Darkspawn…”

“I am so sorry Sister. I am the world’s greatest fool… I should have known. I should have protected you.” Timothy confessed, his voice catching with emotion.

 

“Tim, if I had gone to either of you for help it would have just endangered you and put me at an even greater risk of being discovered by father. I ran because I would not marry for that man’s political gain and because I wanted a life for myself. Nobility never suited me and you know that… I just wish that cost of my decisions didn’t sting so much, Father’s men killed a great many people in getting to me.” She sighed trying to explain herself.

“But Fells…” she sighed, _That could have been her if she stayed._

 

“I know. I am so sorry, whatever you wish from us, from this family you will have it.” Tim promised holding her hands tightly.

Mira smiled softly, relieved that he was still the same brother she remembered. Protective to a fault and kind, most of all kind.

 

“I’m glad to see you Mira. Really, I missed my little sister.” He smiled warmly before turning slightly to grab his crutches.

“Now I believe there are a few introductions to be made.”

 

Mira let him lead her to his beautiful wife Annette and their 5-year-old boy Joran, who had his mother’s eyes and his father’s youthful temperament. Lunch was a quiet affair the four of them looking at the positive side of life rather than dwelling on the bad. Annette had asked about Mira’s travels and listened enthralled by her tales as a mercenary, she was particularly enthralled about her time in Rivain and Orlais.

 

The Lunch went on into the early evening, the three of them chattering and entertaining her nephew who was only too thrilled to call her Auntie Ra _(He couldn't quite say Mira.)_  and listen to her talk about her big and exotic steeds she had found once Timothy told her how his son loved their horses back home.

The group continued until the sun had gone from the sky and Joran had started to drift off to sleep in his mother’s lap.

 

“It was wonderful to see you and I hope I can find some time to see you again before we leave, however I have a battle to prepare for and so little time to do so.” Mira smiled curtsying to take her leave. Tim smiled at her, so happy to see his little sister thriving here. He ignored her curtsy in favour of a broad bear hug before inviting his wife and son into the embrace, thoroughly surrounding the poor short Inquisitor with love as the little boy smacked kisses to her forehead upon his father’s request.

 

“We love you Auntie Ra and no matter what comes, you have our support.” Tim smiled fondly before he and his family took their leave and followed one of the guards back to their quarters for the evening.

Mira smiled happily to herself, family. Family who accepted her, who supported her, who loved her. That’s what she had now family, not just the one she had made for herself here in Skyhold but her own blood… That meant a lot to a woman who once deemed herself broken and wrong for not complying with her _family’s_ wishes.

**


	24. A night of fun. (NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mira goes to the Tavern and get's sloshed! Then proceeds to hunt down her workaholic lover to show him a good time.

 

Chapter 24- A Night of Fun.

 

The evening went along at a right sluggish pace. The War council overwhelmed her with information, troop movements, siege weapons, political alliances they had called on, scout reports and tactics.

But afterwards she was left alone. Cullen had been called down to the camps for a last-minute preparation meeting with his lieutenants and there was apparently nothing else that she was required to do. So, she did what she would always do when she found herself alone, devoid of responsibilities and in the possession of a lot of coin.

 

She went to the Tavern.

 

The Herald’s Rest was busy for your average Friday night soldiers, new recruits and the faithful, all packed in like sardines around any available resting space with a mug in their hand and their spirits raised high. Bull was in his usual spot reciting one of his favourite hunting stories for a group of scouts fresh in from the wilds. She swept through the bar with cheers and praise following her from its patrons as she approached Cabot.

 

“Inquisitor. What can I get you tonight? Mead or Ale?” he asked in his usual disinterested tone.

“INQUISITOR! Hey! Cabot don’t worry I’ve got our girl covered!” Came Iron Bull’s booming voice, surprising Mira slightly before she was hauled off towards his corner with the Chargers.

“Oh, hey Quizzy! Plant a butt.” Sera laughed from her spot next to Krem, even Alistair had found a spot in this nook.

“How’s it going?” she asked feeling lightened by the mood of the Tavern.

“All things considered, pretty damn good! Hey, when we’re finished with all that Warden stuff, can we keep him?” Bull asked gesturing towards Alistair who was listening to Stitches tell one of his more interesting tales.

 

“Aww The Iron Bull wants to keep me. Like a pet! Like a Mabari!” Alistair grinned, joking in that slightly drunk way.

 

“He’s more than welcome to stay, our very own pair of Wardens. We can have the _Bear_ and the _Fair_!” Mira joked, laughing loudly at her own joke. Bull choked on his drink before joining her with a roar of laughter.

“Well with jokes like that, of course I’ll stay. Can’t very well abandon all my new friends!” Alistair cheered, raising his tankard as the Chargers cheered back.

“So, Boss, drink? Want to put some chest on your chest?” Bull offered already pouring a mug of whatever vile they were drinking tonight, the whole crew looking particularly sloshed already.

 

Mira just laughed as she accepted the drink, “But Bull, with tits like these I’m not sure I need any more chest!” She downed the drink in one arching her back to push out her chest for the chorus of whoops and whistles from the tavern. All good natured of course, however there was one who’s eyes lingered just a little bit longer.

 

 

The night carried on later than Mira expected it to, with Bull keeping her suitably topped up with liquor as the conversation between her and Sera took a turn for the more adventurous.

 

 

“Just think ‘bout it Quizzy, _Bees_ buzzing bounding beautiful bees!  In a- _ina_ training dummy, we can watch Commander Jackboot and his recruits run scared. It’ll be frigging hilarious!” Sera cackled drunkenly, tipping back dangerously on her chair as Mira started waving her hands in front of her.

 

“No, no. We can’t do that to Cullen, he’s- _he’s_ too handsome, too sexy, Makers balls he's fucking hot.” Mira moaned _loudly_.

“Holy Shit! Mira’s got the hots for Commander Noodle hair!” Sera shouted drunkenly.

“He does not have noodle hair! It’s curly and sexy. Manly. _Mmhmm_.” Mira defended her lover.

 

“Yeah, yeah, just cause you’re banging the Commander now Boss.”

“Whoa-hey-hey, what happened to tatt face?” Sera asked, tracing the line of Rylen’s tattoo up her nose and almost poking herself in the eye.

 

“He and I had a mutually beneficial arrangement going and but it gets _kinda weird_ when you murder him in a alternative reality, but beside the point, I can fuck who I want to fuck, I’m the Inquisitor! And I want to fuck Cullen.” Mira finished seriously, a determined look crossed her face before she knocked back the last of her drink and stood up suddenly.

“Just where do you think you’re going?” Bull chuckled from his seat, he was enjoying watching the Inquisitor let loose.

 

“To fuck Cullen.” Replied Mira simply as she started to stagger towards the door to the sound of the Sera’s cat calls and the Chargers notes of encouragement.

 

“Damn, somebody make sure she gets there at least. Can’t have our only Inquisitor fall off the battlements or something!” Bull laughed, watching out the corner of his good eye as Alistair drained the last of his drink before standing to follow her.

“I got it. Thanks for the drinks.” The Warden smiled as he left.

 

**

 

Mira staggered out of the tavern and took the immediate right towards the stairs for the battlements.

“Mira. Hey wait. Hold on a sec!” someone called out behind her. She spun on her foot to face whoever was calling her, the drinks Bull had plied her with made her feel light and airy but also sloshing and liquidy. Like the booze.

 

Alistair came striding over quickly to catch up to her, he was slightly less drunk than her.

 

“You sure you want to go to Cullen? Or would you like to head to bed and maybe sleep this off?” Alistair offered sensibly, catching her by the hand to make sure he had her attention.

“Cullen, definitely Cullen please.” Mira smiled, tugging him towards the stairs with a happy grin.

 

“Well, to capture the affection of someone as amazing as you Mira. I’ll admit I’m a little jealous, he’s a lucky man.” Alistair sighed with a tired smile as he helped her navigate the stairway in the dark.

“You’re a lucky man too Alistair and handsome, I’ll find you someone nice. Don’t you worry.” Mira smiled warmly, the drink and her evening in the tavern had put that smile on her face and nothing was going to take it off her.

“That would be nice, but let’s focus on you huh? Feeling okay?” he asked as they came through the first tower.

“Bubbly and happy.” Was her reply, which made the Warden smile in response.

 

Alistair continued to guide her towards Cullen’s tower, his heart and head doing dramatic leaps. Maker this woman was amazing, so lovely even in the middle of all this darkness.

Heh, he used to think the same thing about Audrey…. Maybe that meant this was destined to end up the same way? But really what’s the worst she could do? Exile him? Done that.

She could kill him and _weellll… that would be bad._

 

 

“Alistair, you’re frowning. Frowny face.” Mira giggled, bumping into his shoulder enthusiastically trying to cheer him.

“Huh? I think this booze is making me feel melancholy. Don’t worry about it though, almost at the Commander’s office right?”

“That’s right, just over there. Don’t be sad though. I’ll find a way to make you happy, just you wait!” she smiled, tripping into him. Alistair caught her effortlessly, her cheeks were flushed from the booze, her eyes had a faraway look in them, but oh, she looked so lovely. She lent up on her tiptoes, being that much shorter than him and placed a soft kiss to his cheek.

 

Oh...

Oh damn.

 

She smiled at him as she headed into Cullen’s office with a wave, she said something but he missed it. She kissed him…

Oh, _I’m a bad... bad man_.

**

 

 

Mira entered Cullen’s office half expecting the man to already be in bed, all nice and asleep, and she’d have to wake him up with kisses, kisses that would trail down that muscular chest of his, straight down onto his cock. _Mmm_. But her well laid plans were interrupted when she found her Commander still in his armour, still hard at work, hunched over his desk.

“Mira? I wasn’t expecting you to still be up at this hour, did you need me for anything?” he asked with a gentle smile, he was always happy to see her and now even more so that they were finally together.

 

“Oh love, I need you alright. I seem to have this urge I need your help with. It’s quite difficult to explain, maybe I should show you?” she smirked coming forwards to perch on his desk, being mindful of the papers scattered across it.

“Show me what? Are you feeling alright, you look a little flushed love?” he asked, completely missing the seduction Mira was laying out for him. He held her face gently in his hands, inspecting her for fever or illness, she was flushed.

 

“I had a bit to drink at the Tavern but that’s beside the point. I have this urge, _this need_. It’s been on my mind all day.” She spoke lowly, adding a seductive element to her voice. He kept eye contact with her, still missing the point. One of her hands started to slowly pull apart the buttons to her shirt, starting at the top and working her way down her breasts. With the other hand, she carefully loosened her trousers.

 

“Mira love are you-” Cullen started to ask, now catching up with her efforts but quickly stumbled as she took his hand in hers. Leading him between her legs before taking the first two fingers from that guiding hand and slowly suckling them into her mouth. She wound her tongue around his battle-scared flesh, feeling the callouses built from his years of swordplay and getting them nice and wet. All the while she kept her eyes locked with his, batting her long lashes at him as she removed his fingers and quickly guided that hand down the front of her pants.

“Do you see how wet these urges make me, I need you Cullen. I need you to fuck me Cullen, take me, make me yours.” She moaned as his fingers slid against her. Suddenly Cullen found that sexual expertise that had Mira moaning for him.

 

“Makers breath Mira, you're insatiable! Look at you, so beautiful, so sexy and mine. You are mine and I am yours and I will make you cum, I will make you cry out with pleasure as many times as you ask and maybe a few times more. By the maker woman, I love you.” He growled, his fingers sliding against her slick, finding the little nub that made her squirm as he growled his promises against her lips. His free hand had slid into her open shirt to grope at her breast, pulling that troublesome band down out of the way to better pleasure the flesh underneath.

 

“Oh fuck - fuck Cull-nngh,” she moaned softly.

“You’re the one that asked.” He grinned against her neck as his fingers rolled against her clit.

“Yes, oh maker take me Cullen.” She growled as he bit down softly into her collar. She was in pieces, the booze and his wonderful, marvellous skills were sending her into a spinning spiral of a fast-approaching climax.

 

Cullen moaned into her skin, trying to take in as much as possible. Her scent, her taste, her sounds, her soul. He wanted it all. She moaned louder the closer she got, her inhibitions (Not that she had many to begin with) were lowered due to the alcohol.

She was writhing, rolling her hips up into his hand to try and get more, more feeling, more pleasure, more of everything. Her arms were around his shoulders buried in his fur mantle, fingers curling into his hair as she clung to him.

Cullen groaned headily, he wanted to give it to her but this position only allowed him so much leverage. With a feral growl, he withdrew his hand from her trousers, grabbed the hem of her shirt and ripped it off her, freeing her magnificent breasts.

 

“Yes,” was the only word he would moan. He spun her around so she faced the desk, pressing her forwards onto it as he haphazardly swept some of his requisition papers out of the way all the time moaning and gasping, “Yes, Yes, Yes.”

 

He pressed her down against the wood with his body, the metal of his breastplate made her keen from its contracting coldness, as he ground his very hard cock up against her arse and proceeded to kiss his way down her back. His hands found their way around the band to her trousers, pulling them down much like he’d pulled the shirt from her body. Now kneeling behind her, greeted by the sight of her magnificent arse, not as plump as some of the girls that roamed the streets of Kirkwall but she was still soft, defined with muscled built from walking and small dimples of cellulite from a life well lived.

 

“Cullen, Cully please!” she moaned trying to lean backwards to fist her hand into his hair.

“Just admiring the view love.” He chuckled sinking his teeth high into her thigh, so his nose brushed against the seam of her, her scent filling his nose.

“Well the view wants to be fucked  _Rutherford_.” She shot back at him, eager for him to stop teasing.

 

Cullen just smirked, pressing a kiss to her right butt cheek as he stood to slide his still clothed cock against her again.

“Sorry, you were saying? I was a bit distracted by the view. You wanted something?” he teased bringing his hand underneath her to slowly slide a finger against her sensitive lips.

 

 “Maker save me from the teasing bloody Templar. Cullen, _Fuck. Me._ ” She growled, rolling back against him as she glared at him from over her shoulder.

 

Cullen chuckled as he undid his trousers, his armour stayed on as he simply pulled his cock from his trousers and stroked it against the wetness of her cunt.

“This what you wanted Mira? You want my cock inside you? You want me to fuck you?” he hummed, still stroking her with his cock.

“Yes, oh please, please for the love of Andraste please Cullen.” She practically sobbed in return.

 

He smiled leaning down to kiss her shoulder, _careful to keep his armour from her skin_ , as he slid inside her.

 

 She moaned loudly at the weighted stretch his cock gave her, that pleasurable fullness that only he could provide. Nobody was quite like Cullen, not as wide or as firm, as long or as thick, they didn’t have that glorious slight curve that hit all the right places. In short, they weren’t perfection.

He waited for her to relax, to tell him to move as he idly pressed kisses along her shoulders, taking great care not to brush her with the metal of his armour but she was so caught up with the nuances of his cock that she failed to respond.

 

“Mira? You alright love?” he asked softly, hands rubbing up and down her flanks. He didn’t want to hurt her, he needed her assurance before he started.

“ _yes”_ she replied dreamily reaching back for a kiss.

 

“Want me to fuck you?” Cullen growled low, turning her head, and holding himself above her so she could feel his breath against her lips. _Teasing, Taunting._

“Please Cullen.” She moaned softly still reaching for that kiss.

 

He smiled and obliged, kissing her softly as he pressed his cock in deeper as he rolled his hips. Mira moaned deeply, a gasping tone had taken over her voice as she called to him, as alluring as a siren. He started slow, they hadn’t done this before and he wanted to get the positioning right before he really gave her what she wanted.

 

He leaned down in-between one of his measured thrusts to press a kiss behind her ear only to get a gasping cry in response.

“Did I hurt you?” he asked quickly, leaning back to get a better look at her. She was blushing??

“Your breastplate… it’s cold.” She responded quietly, turning her head away so he wouldn’t see her blush but he could still see it on the tips of her ears.

 

Cullen smirked, slowly leaning down, “Sorry you said something was cold?” he teased as he pressed the metal plate against her bare skin once again if only to hear her cry out in surprise.

 

“CULLEN!” she shouted, whipping her head back to throw him a flustered look before that melted into a sweet pout.

“I’m sorry, you just sounded so... I’ll take it off.” He amended watching that pout melt into a grin as he quickly shrugged off his cloak and reached for the buckles holding the metal plate up.

 

Once the plate was removed and haphazardly thrown back to his chair, he started to roll his hips into her again. He leaned over her, this time with no metal to shock his poor lover as he lay kisses along her shoulders.

Gradually he began to pick up the pace, holding onto her hips for leverage so he didn’t keep hitting her against the edge of the desk. Her hands were wrapped around the opposite edge, holding her back from being literally fucked over the edge.

 

“Cullen! There.” She gasped rolling her hips back onto his length in a counter action. By the Void that was hot!

Cullen picked up the pace again, practically slamming into her with all his strength on each thrust.

 

“Mira. Oh fuck Mira.” He moaned, leaning over her back so he could _really_ let her feel it.

 

His mouth latched onto her neck trying to muffle his moans against her skin. She tasted divine as he sunk his teeth into tender flesh, his hips still snapping into her. Her moans grew higher, she was writhing on the end of his cock like a goddess. **_Maker_** she’s divine.

 

He snapped his hips into her again, this time with a renewed passion that overcame his grip holding her in place, sending her hot body skittering over his desk! Her hands shot out of place, scrambling to catch herself as her hips rucked up half way across the desk, causing her head and chest to be dangling off the other side!

 

“Getting a bit excited love?” she laughed, her body still hanging over the desk as Cullen tried to apologise, pull her back from the edge, and still hump into her, all at the same time. “I don’t want to explain this one to the Healers!” she giggled.

 

“I- Fuck- Sorry. Mmmaker, you’re so- Gah!” he moaned, he was close, his cock twitching inside her as he desperately tried to hold back. He tried to right her, to find her face and kiss his apologies into her lips but all he could find was this laughing mass of red hair, dangling loosely over his desk.

Oh maker, he could feel her laughing, feel her joy in how she clenched around his cock. It felt so damn good, maker he was so close.

 

“My roaring lion,” she laughed loudly, pulling herself upright and giving herself enough leverage to rock back along his cock, “fucking me with his - _ahh-_ cock, are you going to come my fearsome lion? My commander? My - _mmm_ \- My Cullen.” Her voice dipped into something seductive, dark, and delightful, full of humour but at the same time full of lust.

 

Cullen moaned loudly, rubbing his forehead against her shoulder to try and distract himself from how close he was, how her words made him feel.

He pulled her back, letting her feet stabilize on the floor at his side of the desk. Her hand snaked back into his hair, pulling, and tugging at his locks as she moulded her body against his chest. They were both hot and sweaty, his shirt caught between the both of them, soaked in their sweat.

“Fuck me Cullen,” she moaned rocking back against him, her free hand coming down to rub at her clit. “I want you to claim me, mark me, paint me with your come Cullen.” She growled, teeth bared as she fought for her orgasm. She snapped her hips back into him, meeting his rhythm in a way that made her lovely arse bounce against his hips.

 

He was hot, burning all over for her, sweat sickened between their bodies, his clothes sticking to him in uncomfortable ways. He kissed along her neck, stopping to nibble at her skin, tasting it with swipes of his tongue in place he knew her to be ticklish.

Her bright bubbling laughter carved through the lustful air surrounding them causing him to smile against her neck. He listened in delight as her laughter gave way to long breathy moans as her rhythm faltered, her fingers drew tighter in his hair as she arched against his chest, her core tightening along his cock as she started to shake.

 

Watching her orgasm was like watching a goddess dance just for him, the feel of her against his skin, the sound of her pleasure, of her crying out for him so loudly that he was certain everyone in Skyhold could hear her! He couldn’t hold back any more, he growled lowly, his own sounds growing louder and louder as he wrapped his arms around her waist. One hand settling over one of her perfect breasts, holding her taught against his still clothed chest as she rode out the last of her orgasm in pleasurable pulses around his cock.

He snapped his hips into her with determination, getting lost in the way her hips bounced against him with the last deep thrusts before he let himself go. Roaring into the night...

_If anyone was still oblivious to their relationship… well all of Skyhold would know now._

 

He could feel himself coming, spending hot pulses into her as she moaned against him, rocking with him to extend the pleasure. He buried his face against her neck, her scent filling his nose, her whole being covered his senses, marking him, claiming him as her own as he claimed her in turn.

And then his strings were cut, all the tension in his body that drove him to their orgasm fled as they both collapsed back into the desk.

Sweaty and sated.

 

 

**

Cullen was panting, sprawled over her back and she was laughing. Giddily, hysterically and Cullen couldn’t help but join her. He rolled over to stop pressing his chest into her back, Maker the desk was cold and did the ink spill? Shit… hmm only a little bit, he could clean that up later.

 

“I think you broke me Cully. Mmm definitely good sex.” She laughed rolling over to face him. She leant up to kiss him, just a peck really but it made him grin broadly.

He smiled at her, his hand coming over to cup her face as he watched her smile back at him.

 

“Maybe we should go to bed?”

“Ooh, I’ve never been to your room.” She grinned as she started to sit up.

“I assure you it’s nothing special, and my bed’s not nearly as comfortable as yours.”  He chuckled as he stood, reaching out a hand to help her.

“But I’m sure it smells like you, come ser knight. Whisk me away to your manly bed chambers.” Mira laughed as she let Cullen wrap her up in his arms. “Cold, you’re cold.” She complained shivering against him. Cullen pulled back and quickly wrapped her up in his fur mantle, tying the red cotton around her waist. Mmmmmm even with it on her, the fur barely covered the curve of her beautiful breasts.

 

He laughed as she buried face into the fur and inhaled.

“Well, if you like the smell of sweaty man, I can oblige.” Cullen joked as he guided her towards the stairs. Even wearing his cloak, she was still practically naked as he put her hands on the wooded slats and watched her beautiful body move upwards for his viewing pleasure. The cloak was always more to warm the front, only coming down to the middle of her back.

 

He watched with rapt attention as he mapped out every scar, every fading bruise, the odd burns, her beautiful tattoo. As she moved he traced his fingers over each and every one. Claw marks by her ribs were a new addition from a recent encounter with a bear. A faded scar on the opposite side, a failed assassination attempt in Rivain. Bruises that were fading from the Western Approach. He smirked, kissing her hips as they passed his mouth before following her up, listening to the delighted giggles she gave as he stalked her up the ladder.

Mira grinned as she crossed the top of the ladder and stood there waiting for Cullen.

 

“This is your room! There’s a tree in here Cullen! An actual tree!!” she gasped throwing a hand on her hip as he crossed the threshold into his loft.

“It’s… um… I don’t really have a good answer for that.” He muttered rubbing his hand along the back of his neck.

 

She stood there inspecting his room and he suddenly felt like he was back in training and she was a revered mother inspecting his bunk. But no wait, oh maker forgive him. He should not be comparing the beautiful and seductive half naked woman to an old biddy of a mother figure. Ew.

 

“Well if you had to have nature invade your room, at least it’s a pretty tree.” she smirked, leaning back over her shoulder to look at him.

 

In an instant, all thoughts of chantry’s and revered mothers were wiped from his head. The only thing left was her. This perfect woman, this perfect being. Funny and seductive. Clever and sharp.

 

“You’re prettier.” He told her, that love-struck smile pulling at his lips.

“Oh-ho is that so handsome?” she laughed waiting for him to get closer to her so she could lean back into him.

“Mmmhmm, prettier and sexier and **oh sweet maker** woman you’re _freezing_!” he squeaked once he got his hands on her! Her fingers were like ice, maker he could only imagine what her feet were like!

 

He spun her around, practically sweeping her up into his arms as he marched her over to the bed.

“Cullen, Cull-en, I’m still warm from the ale, Cullen!” Mira squealed with joy as Cullen fussed over her, wrapping his cloak around her firmly before he put her under the furs on his bed.

“No, my lovely woman will not be cold on my watch. As your Commander, I must insist that I warm you up.” He told her with that lovely grin plastered to his face as he stripped down to his under shirt and trousers before following his lover to bed. She had the furs pulled up to chin, her eyes sparking with barely restrained mirth.

 

“You know; I have heard that skin to skin contact is the best way to warm someone up.” She told him with a sly smirk, just seconds before he actually got into bed. He paused, taking in her words slowly before he smirked back, pulling off the last of his clothes and dropping them unceremoniously before he followed her under the furs as a cold breeze swept through the room.

 

She laughed as he furrowed in beside her, capturing her with his arms and pulling her in close. The moment she met his chest she leant up to find his mouth, kissing him softly and with a happiness that was still new and bubbly to both of them.

He smiled down at her when she pulled away, worming his warm fingers under his cloak. “You know; you did say skin to skin love.” He chuckled, pulling back the cotton to feel all her lovely curves. Both giggled as she practically shed his cloak to wrap her naked arms and legs around him.

 

“I love you.” She sighed happily once they were pressed flushed together.

“I love you to.” He replied, pressing a kiss into her hair.

They were quiet for a while the laughter had died down but the smiles had not.

 

 

“Cullen? Tell me a story.” She giggled, burrowing against him _._ He thought she was over the effects of the Alcohol. _Obviously not._

“Hmm? And what kind of story would you like my love?” he hummed, slowly stroking his thumb back and forth across her skin.

 

“Oh, a sexy one!” she chirped making him laugh.

“You wish to hear about my past exploits?” he broached in confusion.

 

“Yes! You said it’d been awhile before, but sure you’ve got some stories.” She purred, looking up at him as she rested her head on his chest.

“Not as many as you think I bet.” He hummed before thinking to himself, “What would you like to hear?”

 

“What about your first kiss?” she prompted.

 

“My first kiss was with a girl in from my village, she had the longest brown hair I’d ever seen and she always used to braid in these bright yellow wildflowers,” he paused, running his fingers through Mira’s hair as he spoke, “She asked me to dance at the Harvest Festival-“

“I thought you didn’t dance?” Mira piped up with a cheeky grin.

 

“Only very badly, but 10-year-old me thought I did okay.” He chuckled, pressing a lazy kiss to his lover’s hair, making her laugh all the same. “We hid behind the apple cart after the dance and she kissed me. Maker, I didn’t know what to do, I just stood there before my sister Mia came barging over and tore me away by the ear! She scolded me for running off a few minutes before she promised not to tell Mother.”

Mira giggled brightly at the tale, “I think I need to meet your sister. She sounds like a bit of a bad ass.”

 

He hummed in agreement. His thoughts lingering on the home that was no longer there…

 

“Tell me another one. A sexy one!” she asked again.

_Maybe he should get her another drink? Maybe she’ll go to sleep then??_

 

A memory crossed his mind, something he knew Mira would enjoy.

 

“Do you want to know what Templar recruits get up to at night?” he growled suggestively. He watched her turn to face him, leaning up on one arm. _That caught her attention._

She hummed at him to continue.

 

“We used to sleep in the barracks, all of the recruits’ pack into one big hall. All sweaty, smelly, and lustful. Sometimes some of the boys found their way into someone else’s bed.”

She was biting her lip at this mind, her mind racing with so many perverse thoughts.

 

“One night I found such a boy in my bed… We’d been friends since training and I think he always had a bit of a crush on me… _Andraste_ that sounds likes I’m bragging.” He coughed, running his fingers through his hair nervously.

 

“No. What happened?” she asked quickly, clearly invested in his story.

“We kissed at first, more enthusiasm that finesse, then our hands started to explore, trying to get between our grinding hips-” Mira’s whimpering moan interrupted him.

“We ended up with our hands down each other’s pants, stroking the other off until we finished.”

 

“You were with a man?” she asks almost breathlessly. “What happened after?”

“I was once… He died at Kinloch… I’d prefer not to speak of that. Such memories have no place colouring this.” He hummed, pulling her back into his arms.

 

“Alright. But if you were- do you like men?” she asked curiously, stroking his chest soothingly as she spoke.

 

“I prefer women but I do like some men, they have to impress me… What about you?”

“Do I like women? I like women, not as much as I like men though. Before this,” she paused pointing between the two of them, “Sex was just sex, I enjoyed pretty much everything, Human, Elf, Dwarf. Never got around to trying Quinari though, think the Iron Bull will give me a ride?” she smirked, sliding her leg over his suggestively.

 

“No.”

“No? But Bull likes redheads."                                                                                                                                                                     

“No, you cannot ride the Bull, I’m pretty sure Dorian would electrocute you.” Cullen warned with a smug smirk.

“Dorian? Really?”

“I’ll let him tell you about it.” He hummed and she agreed.

 

 

The both settled for a moment, the endless topic of questions seemingly depleted… that was until…

 

 

“Cullen? I have a question for you.” Mira asked suddenly shifting up again to look at him.

“So many question my love.” He responded with a laugh and a soft smile, as he found her cold fingers in his hand.

 

She took one of her hands to trace her thumb over his lips, trailing up along the scar.

 

“How did you get it? The scar I mean, not your handsome face, I imagine your mother was responsible for that one.” She smirked leaning down to brush her lips against his. He smiled into it, warmed by her easy humour and her taste. They kissed softly for a few moments, Cullen let her tangle her fingers into his hair and tease out a few curls.

“It’s not an interesting story Mira.” He sighed softly, breaking from the kiss to give her his answer.

“Is a sexy one?” she asked teasingly as Cullen readjusted her in his arms.

 

“Well if you count getting beaten up by idiots as sexy, sure.” He shrugged, well as best as he could while keeping his arms around his woman.

“Mm, you don’t have tell me, was just curious is all.” Yawned as she snuggled down into his side.

“It was after the Battle of Kirkwall. People were still angry at the Templars… after what Meredith did I don’t blame them. I got jumped, on the way back to the barracks one night. They saw I was trying to organise the last of the Kirkwall Templars and a group of mages and mage sympathizers tried to kill me. The scar on my face isn’t the only one they left me with that night.” He sighed slowly taking the hand he still held and traced it over a long thin scar over his chest and then another by his hip.

“I managed to fight them off for a while, but Hawke arrived and helped me out. She actually healed most of the scars herself before she punched me in the face, for being an idiot who walked the streets alone. That’s how I got the scar.” He chuckled, trying to employ some of her classic humour to diffuse the sudden tension.

 

She smiled back at him, picking up on his joke and kissed him in reward still tracing her fingers over his scars. When they finally broke apart from the kiss, she grinned madly taking his hand in hers.

“See this one?” she asked, taking his finger to trace over an assortment of smaller scars and nicks. “Fell off the rigging of the Siren’s Call. And this one? Tripped over a drunk dwarf into a table of empty wine glasses. And-and this one? Bears! Like a really big one.” She smiled, letting him trace all of her sillier scars she’d collected over the years to make him laugh.

“See we’ve both got scars Cullen, they all have stories. Sometimes they’re tough, other times they’re stupid or funny but they’re just another part of us aand I had a point here.” She pouted suddenly surprising Cullen. It must have shown on his face because she continued, “No really! It was really profound but well, they’re a part of you right and well you might not have noticed, I am pretty subtle about it, but I’m pretty keen on all of you Cullen, scars included.” She chuckled, practically beaming at him.

 

“I’m pretty keen on you too Mira.” He smiled, ever so fondly. Maker he loved this woman. He held her cheek in his hand softly, so softly, like she was a fragile thing to be savoured and revered.

“I love you Mira Trevelyan.” He whispered to her.

“I love you too Cullen Rutherford.” she replied, voice muffled against his chest as they snuggled down together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We got some Alistair pining (Soon my peeps, soon!) and some hot damn smut for you lot along with some adorable pillow talk.  
> In other news, I've just finished 8 massive uni assignments in 1 week. Go me!!


	25. Breakfast

 

 _ Chapter 25 -  Breakfast _ _. _

 

 

 

Breakfast.

 

Mira was talking to him, just causally. Telling him a story about Rivain he thought. He wanted to listen but it was just so hard. The song, the music was so loud. His ears screeching with the noise. That hauntingly sad song. He went to take another bite out of his breakfast, a bit of grilled tomato when his stomach turned.

He looked at his plate and didn’t see food anymore, he saw bodies, blood, pieces of innards sewn across the table. Darkspawn gnawing at the long ropes of intestines and oh maker the smell. It invaded his nose, his mouth, his palate.

 

He shot up suddenly, feeling dizzy and nauseous. He needed to get out of there, _NOW_.

“Alistair? Are you alr-“ Mira started to ask.

“Gonna be sick.” Was all he could mumble out before he bolted for the nearest side passage.

 

The running wasn’t helping his stomach but it was all he could do to reach the open window in time. He reached that blast of fresh air only moments before his throat filled with bile.

As he emptied his guts out the window he felt a small soothing hand rubbing his back.

 

“Hey, there you go.” The soft voice soothed as he finished up. Gasping for air.

Alistair’s legs went out from under him as he slumped back into the building, no longer hanging over the side of a very steep drop.

Mira was there, looking very concerned and so was Cullen who was trying to put a flask of water into his hands. He accepted the flask clumsily but gratefully took a few sips to try and wash away that disgusting taste lingering in his mouth and throat.

 

“Are you going to be alright? Do you want me to send for a healer?” Cullen asked as Mira quickly felt his forehead with the back of her hand, checking for fever.

“No, I’ll be alright now. It was just the Calling. It was… so loud.” He told them, he was overcome with exhaustion.

 

Both Mira and Cullen shared a concerned look.

 

“Come on, my quarters are just around the corner. I’ve got some tea that will settle your stomach.” Mira told him, rather firmly he thought. There was no questioning her this time. Not that he was in any position not to. Cullen came over to help him up off the ground, securing the lid back on the flask before Mira guided them both back towards her quarters.

 Mira got them both into her quarters quietly and gestured for the pair of them to sit at her couch while she brewed some tea.

 

“Does the Calling,” Mira began but paused, trying to think of the right words. “Does it make you see things? Give you visions?” she asked cautiously. She’d seen something in his eyes before he bolted.

 

_Fear. Pure unadulterated fear._

                                                                                                                                                                                

“It’s more like memories… but they’re different. They’re not quite how you remember them and they’re so much more intense. What I saw… well let’s just say it wasn’t daisy’s and sunshine.” He joked trying to shift attention away from himself. Alistair glanced over to Cullen to try and make him understand and even before he turned to look, he had Cullen’s hand patting his shoulder reassuringly.

“Are all the Grey Wardens seeing that?” Mira asked, handing over a large mug of tea. The cup itself look like it was handmade, not like the others in the main hall. (Maybe she picked it up on her travels?)

 

“I’m not sure, a couple complained bitterly about nightmares before I left but we were all having nightmares. Maybe this is new?” he offered unsurely, the song had quietened now but it was still getting harder and harder to think clearly.

“It just seems a bit strange. You see we’ve got our own Grey Warden, Blackwall, you’ve met him. He’s not having nightmares as far as I could tell and he still seemed in fine when we left him in the Approach.” Mira frowned clearly deep in thought.

 

“He did seem a bit off I agree and when I asked him about Duncan he didn’t really seem to recognise who I was talking about. Granted he died over ten years ago but you don’t just forget the former Warden Commander of Ferelden, especially a man like Duncan.” Alistair added, finding himself also frowning by the end of it.

 

Something wasn’t right but then again, all the Warden’s weren’t acting quite right so maybe… Gah he didn’t know! He’s practically losing his mind here!

 

“I’ll have Leliana look in to it.” Cullen decided, “No harm in being careful and you,” he added turning to Alistair, “Drink your tea and get some rest, we’re marching out day after tomorrow and I really don’t need you collapsing before we even get to the fight.”

“Hey, Ow! That hurt. Could you maybe stab me in the front next time? Besides, I’m older that you _Curly Cully_ if anything you have to do what I say.” Alistair teased, hopefully brining up a nick name he hadn’t heard since the abbey.

 

“Curly Cully?” Mira asked turning to Alistair with a bright smile.

 

“That’s not- Besides the point, I am Commander of this Inquisition I out rank you here.” Cullen retorted quickly trying to intimidate Alistair after that well struck tease. Even if the effect was rather marred by his blushing.

“I am a Grey Warden; we operate outside of standard military conventions. Nice try.” Alistair smirked leaning back against the couch like he’d won.

 

“Well if we’re going to get technical _recruit_ I still hold the title of Knight Commander, so, sorry what was your title again?” Cullen asked, his lips pulling up into that devious smirk of his. He played dirty and he knew it, Mira knew it and oh boy was it turning her on but more importantly the sight of them bickering like little boys had her so thoroughly amused it was hard to keep a straight face.

 

 “Oh-ho that’s low.” Alistair hissed, clutching his chest like it was a mortal wound.

 

“Now the way I see it, is there’s only one way to settle this who out ranks who, cock measuring contest.” Mira started while both Cullen and Alistair choked at the mention of _cock measuring_ but Mira just powered on through.

 

“A contest of arms in our little training ring. Whoever wins gets bragging rights and a prize of their choice, grantable by the loser.” Mira smirked finishing her idea to an excited Warden and a practically scowling Commander.

 

“I’m in. no way I’m turning down this ‘cock measuring contest’, What do you say Curly Cully?” Alistair laughed happy to have the distraction and something to do.

“I- Mira you really can’t-” Cullen started to complain but the look he got from his lover told him she was completely serious.

“Well we could make this an actual cock measuring contest if you really wanted? I have a sneaking suspicious you’d win too.” Mira smirked, flickering her eyes down suggestively much to Alistair’s shocked and rambunctious laughter. Cullen practically choked on his own tongue in response to her sexual flirting.

 

“ _Mira!”_ he growled pinching the bridge of his nose.

 

“I’ll leave you two to get ready, see you in the ring _Curly Cully_.”  Alistair laughed softly as he got up to leave.

“Come back for some tea anytime Alistair.” Mira smiled, waving him off without breaking eye contact with her lover.

 

The pair waited for Alistair to leave, waiting for the door to signal his departure before Cullen made his move. He stepped forwards suddenly, wrapping his arm around her waist as he pulled her into him.

 

“You are a minx. _Cock measuring contest?_ Could you make it sound more suggestive?” Cullen complained, holding his arms around her waist.

“Mmm I could try? He’s rather handsome don’t you think?” she smiled, leaning up to place a soft brush of a kiss against his stubbled jaw.

 

“Really Mira? Really?” Cullen asked with a hint of exasperation.

 

“Yes really. I was thinking that _maybe_ when all this trouble with the Wardens is over, we could invite him to bed? It could be a lot of fun.” She suggested with an easy, yet seductive smile.

All of Cullen’s brain came to a blinding, screeching halt. She said what now!? In an instant, the hands on her wait clamped down to hold her at arm’s length, as if she was a dangerous material or a screaming child.

 

“ _WHAT!_ ” he barked loudly. Mira was stunned, her face losing all trace of her jovial charm as it slipped into surprise and confusion.

 

“What _what?_ I thought you and he were flirting?” she asked with a slight frown.

“ _Flirting?! I what??_ ” he continued, his voice definitely a few octaves higher than normal.

 

“You and Alistair? All that who’s in charge stuff??” she prompted, testing the waters almost and when she didn’t get a response other than Cullen’s stunned silence she slowly began to realise.

“Ooh, so I think I may have read the situation wrong. I’m sorry, I just thought…  I mean I grew up among pirates, so my social norms are… _well_... a bit skewed.” She said, this time rubbing the back of her neck awkwardly.

 

“So, you thought we were flirting and so you what? Offered a threesome?” Cullen asked for clarification, the blush highlighting his cheeks was not going to calm down any time soon.

 

“Well! He’s attractive, you’re very attractive and I’m really good at being in the middle!” she spoke, her voice taking on that slight panic that she’d sometimes get when she was _really_ caught off guard.

 

“No, sorry. I overstepped. I’m sorry Cullen. Forgive me.”  She hung her head, her whole frame slinking over in an apologetic stance.

“Nothing to forgive love. You just caught me off guard… what if I said that I might like your idea?” he asked curiously.

 

“The threesome idea? With Alistair and us?”

“Yes. That one.” He clarified, _oh that blush was just getting hotter and hotter the more they spoke._

                                                                                                                                                                     

“Then I’d say we wouldn’t do anything without everyone’s express consent and there’d be rules set up to protect us and each other… but if you wanted to and he wanted to then I’d be really excited to do that.” Mira smiled. The panic was lessening in contrast with how Cullen was smiling back her.

“I think I want to, but let me get to know him a bit more before I decide if he’s someone I want to get into bed with.” Cullen nodded finally and Mira beamed at him. She couldn’t believe her maker damn luck, here was the man, this wonderful handsome man who was just… so damn good for her.

 

“I love you. So damn much.” She told him, quickly coming forward to mash their lips together in a hungry kiss. He melted against her as her arms came up around his shoulders and she propped herself up on tiptoes to get a better vantage to kiss him.

“mmfph, I’m *kiss* glad.” He managed to get out between breaths before pulling back slightly. “Love you too.” He smiled at her.

“Mmm, so see in you in the ring right Commander?” she smirked turning away from him as she went to oversee some paperwork left on her desk.

 

“You’ll be the death of me, you know that?” he sighed grudgingly as he took his leave, not without the cheerful _Love you too_ from his Inquisitor lightening his step.

**

 

The sun was high in the sky, heat rising in their mountain keep. The crowds were gathering around the ring, Sera, Varric and Mira were rallying them up into placing bets and there stood Alistair on the opposite side of the ring, _polishing_ his sword.

_Ah maker’s breath Mira what have you done to me?_

 

“Attention ladies and gentlemen! Members of the Inquisition, I welcome you to today’s match!” Mira yelled suddenly, capturing everyone’s attention as she balanced precariously on the wooden railing, standing so everyone could see her.

 

“We have on my right the Former Knight-Commander, Lion of Ferelden, Commander of my forces, Cullen Stanton Rutherford!” The crowd cheered for their Commander, rallied by their Inquisitor.

“And on my left, we have a veteran of the fifth Blight, fearsome slayer of Darkspawn, Grey Warden of Legend! Warden Alistair Therin!” the crowd roared again, this time with an admirable input from the chargers who had already claimed the Warden as their own.

 

“This battle is a battle of rights! Of pride and dignity! But most of all, of fun! So, grab a tankard, plant your butts, and place some bets! Bragging rights to the winner and good luck to both fighters!” she finished, bowing slightly before doing a showy jump off the railing and disappearing into the crowd.

 

 

They were fighting with blunted steel and shields but still the heat was sweltering!

 

“Oi Commander! Why don’t we up the ante as they say?” shouted Alistair as he pulled off his armour and shirt, leaving him standing only in his boots and trousers. Much to the wild cheering of the crowd! Particularly from the female crowd.

Then he heard Mira’s voice, singled out from the crowd behind him chanting “ _Cull-en, Cull-en, Cull-en.”_

 

He sighed resigning to his fate and shrugged off his armour, allowing one of the recruits to take it away to hang up. Again, this was met with more wild cheering and what looked like one Orlesian ponce fainting with a gasp.

Cullen turned back to find Mira in the crowd, they had a few minutes before the match began he thought it’d be the perfect time to tease her a bit, just a little bit of pay back for getting him into this situation in the first place. He found her quickly and beckoned her over.

 

“Like what you see Inquisitor?” he purred into her ear as she leant over the railing.

“Mmm I do indeed. Oh is Alistair doing flexes? My isn’t he… ooh he’s handsome. Mmmm I think the winner should get a kiss, I’d kiss those abs. Every single one.” She smirked giving as good as she got, redirecting both of their attentions to the Warden on the other side of the ring.

“I suppose I’ll just have to beat him then, let’s see how those pretty muscles compare to skill and training?” he growled, quickly capturing her in a deep kiss which according to the gasps from the crowd more Orlesians fainted from.

 

The pair parted on a wistful sigh from Mira and a sly grin from Cullen. She watched both men as they stretched in anticipation for the match. Maker she was ogling harder than she’d ever ogled before.

She could still taste Cullen on her lips, this _love_ thing they had, it was still so new to her. Being with Cullen felt like a cat snoozing in a sunbeam, warm, comfortable and most of all safe. Being with Cullen was safe, she trusted him, she knew right down in her bones that he would never, ever, hurt her… and she loved him for it, she wanted to curl around the comfort and warmth that was all him and stay there for as long as she could.

But then she looked at Alistair, with those tanned muscles and interesting scars… some that even looked like he’d been in the jaws of some great beast! He was beautiful and strong, she watched him put himself in danger to protect her over and over again though their trek in the Approach. He was her friend, a protector just like Cullen but she saw parts of him that resonate so clearly with her, that she couldn’t help but be draw to him.

The drinking, the self-deprecating attitude hidden behind thinly veiled jokes, the loss …  the heartache.

Every time she looked at him she wanted to help, she wanted to give him the warmth and comfort she felt with Cullen.

 

It also had nothing to do with the way both men were looked, all muscled and strong, made her _ wetter than the entirety of the Amaranthine Ocean._

 

 

“You ready Alistair?” Cullen shouted out, mainly for the crowd, but it drew her attention back as well.

“Only if you’re ready to have your ass handed to you.” Alistair replied with a laugh, bashing his sword against his shield in a customary intimidation tactic.

 

“Oh you… _cocky little shit._ ” Cullen mumbled readying his sword and shield as he stepped forwards into the ring.

“Alright, Varric, Sera? We good?” Mira called out into the crowd, with a holler and a whoop in reply Mira resumed her position atop the railing.

“Ladies and Gentlemen, the bets are at a close. Who will win this battle of wills, our brave Commander or our dear Warden ally? Let the fight being!”

 

Alistair barely had time to grin at the lovely Inquisitor before Cullen was on him, shield colliding with his sword on pure reflex as Cullen pursued him across the ring, as Alistair managed to block blow after punishing blow.

Finally, he managed to get a good footing, planting his back foot in the ground Alistair caught Cullen mid swing and slamming all his weight into a shield bash. Cullen was caught by surprise, none of his recruits had been able to defend against one of his Assaults for weeks! He quickly hid a small smirk before allowing the break in routine as both men created space between each other.

 

“That was a good warm up Cull, didn’t expect that. I figured you for one of those guys who goes long and slow.” Alistair commented after catching his breath. Before he could even respond he could hear Mira’s voice behind him tell someone _“That’s only in bed._ ”

 

Her voice almost distracted him, maker, _the things she does to him_. Even her lingering scent in her chambers was enough to distract him these days, especially when she was out on missions.

 

“I can go long and slow If you want Alistair I only thought to see what you’re made of first.” Cullen smirked back, completing the cocky motion with a slight shrug.

Alistair laughed in response before lunging at Cullen, hoping to catch him off guard. But Cullen was waiting for it, he knocked Alistair’s powerful blow just inches away from his side and used the remaining momentum to shield bash Alistair’s open flank knocking the warden off balance.

 

“I’m normally much better at this.” Alistair grinned in enjoyment as Cullen gave him the chance to right himself. He managed to steal a glance at his lover, Mira was watching them with a blush slowly rising on her cheeks, he wanted to draw this out for her.

 

She watched as they moved and stretched. Strong muscles rippling with exertion Cullen’s slightly golden skin glistening with sweat while Alistair’s cheeks were taking on a wonderful red tinge as he fought back against her commander. They were both holding their ground, both dancing around each other, testing the waters with different tactics, dazzling the crowd with flurries of powerful attacks and clever defensive manoeuvres.

Mira wondered if Cullen had settled on playing the long game like Alistair had suggested beforehand but then things started to flare up. Both men where trading blows back and forth, swords flashing in the warm afternoon sun, sweat dripping off their backs. Maker it made Mira’s knees weak just watching them.

It was over before Mira could even register what happened. They both stood there, swords at each other’s throats, both of them panting harshly.

 

“Care to call it a draw Commander?” Alistair panted roughly, his shoulder was beginning to sag, the blade in his hand stayed firm though.

“Tired Alistair? Where’s that famous Warden stamina we hear so much about?” Cullen taunted back but Mira could see he was just as exhausted. The both waited for a few seconds for one of them to either attack or admit to a draw. Mira was thankful when they both lowered their swords at the same time.

 

“Can’t have you falling over from exhaustion, we’ve a real battle to fight in a few days.” Cullen grunted with just a hint of a tease to their dear warden.

“Same goes to you, we need our Commander in tip-top condition.” Alistair smiled back as he came forwards to shake his opponents hand. Cullen smiled back grateful for Alistair’s compassion, he wasn’t sure if he could have lasted much longer, Alistair is quite the formidable opponent. The both looked over to Mira for her cue.

“And that concludes this battle, a Draw between two great warriors. Now dear friends, drink and make merry for soon we head to real battles, to Adamant to stop one of Coryphaeus’s mad plans but tonight, Rejoice!” Mira shouted, addressing the crowd much to their cheers in satisfaction before they started to disperse.

 

Both boys waited as Mira hopped into the ring to greet them.

“So, did you boys have fun causing the marquis and about half of our female patrons to faint?” she asked smugly as she came closer. Alistair was immediately drawn to the roll of her hips, _maker save him._  Cullen just grinned as she approached, pleased to see his lover enjoying their performance.

 

“Why? Are you feeling faint?” Alistair chuckled, still caught up in the sight of her, blood pumping in his veins from the battle.

 

“Are you calling me fat enough to be half our female patrons?” Mira gasped, pulling a very convincing shocked look, she placed her hand over her chest to continue the effect.

Fear flushed through Alistair, chilling him to the bone as he stuttered to answer.  

 

“No! no, of course not! You’re beautiful, of course! S-stunning!” he croaked, voice squeaking in embarrassment. Cullen caught Mira’s eye to make sure she was joking, smirking quietly as he decided to join in.

“Beautiful? Stunning, is it? Is that what you think of my lady?” Cullen questioned sternly, pulling Mira to his side to defend her honour.

 

“NO, I-!!” Hands hurriedly shaking in front of him.

 

“ _Oh, so I’m not stunning?”_ Mira butt in with a huff, batting Cullen’s chest, continuing the joke.

 

“ **Of course, you are!** You’re gorgeous and- and- _YOU’RE- YOU’RE JOKING!”_ He cried out when Mira couldn’t hold her laughter anymore, _“_ Maferath’s balls. You two are mean.” He sulked shoving Cullen’s shoulder, knocking them both idiots off balance as they laughed at their joke.

“Aww, sorry Alistair. But you have to admit, you’re easy to tease.” She smiled, stepping out of Cullen’s grasp to press a kiss to his cheek.

 

Alistair stopped, froze at the warm press of her lips, the heat of her radiating out from her body as stood on tip toes to kiss him. He glanced warily at Cullen but was surprised to see him smiling, calm but still happy… _what’s going on?_

As quick as she moved to kiss him, she left, her warmth left him. _Wanting_.

 

“I-I- ah- _well_.” He fumbled blushing hard as he stared at his shoes. Cullen chuckled quietly, _Maker is this what he was like at the start?_

 

“Inquisitor!” a scout shouted as he ran over, all three of them turned to look... Oh maker, It’s _Fucking Jim._

Mira caught sight of the scout and ducked, “I was never here.” She hissed, blending in with the crowd barely 5 feet away as she fled from her responsibilities. Cullen just laughed _, there she goes, at it again._

 

“Ah-ha Sers, have you by chance seen the Lady Inquisitor, i could have sworn I just saw her!” Jim panted, he’d run over as soon as fast as he could.

“Oh shame, you just missed her. What’s your rush soldier?” Alistair asked casually, Jim looked to his Commander clearly hesitant to tell information to an outsider.

“Go on, I trust him.” Cullen assured, almost missing the side eyed look he got from Alistair as he spoke. Intrigue and curiosity.

 

“The Lady Ambassador wants to make certain adjustments to her armour, she wants the Inquisitor to represent the Inquisition in all aspects. Especially in the upcoming battle Ser.”

 

“*Sigh*, I’ll go talk to Harret. I’ll see if he can’t make her a cloak or something with the Inquisition insignia on it. If Josie’s got further questions, tell her I’ll be in the Undercroft.” Cullen sighed, dismissing the scout… only to have Jim stay, waiting for something.

“I think that’s your cue.” Alistair whispered conspiratorially to Jim. Jim, _bless him,_ had the good sense to look sheepish before heading back inside the keep to deliver the Commander’s message.

 

There was a shuffle, a bump against Alistair’s shoulder before a cloaked figure wormed their way between the two men.

“Really, A cloak? Why do I need a cloak? It’ll get in the way when I fight.” The woman grumped, pulling down the hood on the wooden cloak to reveal herself. _Damn she was a good rouge._ She changed her stance completely taking Alistair by surprise when Mira took down the hood, Cullen remained un-phased, _he’d seen her tactics first hand… when she knocked him on his ass._

 

“Where you there the whole time?” Alistair asked clearly surprised at her skills at deception.

“Ah no, did a lap around the ring, borrowed a cloak, came back when I saw Jim leave. Maker that boy has no tact.” Mira laughed, bundling up the cloak as she hung it over the training ring.

“All to avoid the terrors of paperwork, or a fitting. I wish I could get away with running from messengers, Maker knows I want to.” Cullen grumbled, running his hand through his hair absently.

Mira laughed, “As your lover, please do! You need a day off. But as Inquisitor I’m pretty sure every messenger in Skyhold would lose their minds if you started running from them.”

 

Alistair perked at that, he knew they were together but that was the first time he’d hear her call Cullen her lover… it was… he just sighed internally, a wistful longing that he knew would never happen.

“I’m inclined to believe you.” Cullen rumbled before pulling her closer. “Now I seem to recall you saying the winner would get a kiss.” He smirked, his scar tugging lip.

 

“But it was a draw?” She questioned, _what was he getting at?_

“I know.” Cullen smirked, _if this was what she wanted_ … maybe he could facilitate. _Maybe?_

 

“Oh, so does that mean you both get a kiss?” Mira was smiling now, she could see what Cullen was angling at even if Alistair was looking all the more confused beside them,

“I should think so.” He smiled, giving Mira a little nudge towards the other man.

 

Mira stumbled the few steps towards Alistair, her smile bright on her face as Alistair himself glanced back and forth between the two lovers. He looked at Cullen to find his calm assurance, it was odd. What man in their right mind would share this beautiful creature? But the moment he looked at Mira’s smiling face, everything else just melted away.

She leaned into him, balancing on her tip toes as she placed her hand on his cheek, pulling him down to press a soft kiss to his lips. Alistair’s breath caught, she was kissing him, actually, literally kissing him! His eyes fluttered closed in disbelief, he wanted to savour this, the moment, her lips against his… the gentle scent that came from her perfume and the softness of her hand.

 

And then, she was gone. The moment over as she slipped away from him, turning with a smile to her lover. Alistair watched her move, heart racing in his chest. Watched the smile on her face as she pulled Cullen in with both hands, while he placed both hands around her waist. Cullen grinned broadly even as they kissed, his fingers playing with the ends of her hair.

 

He understood now, ‘ _What kind of man would share this beautiful creature?’_ The kind who wants to see her smile. Who wants to make her happy... The kind of man Cullen was.

 

Cullen was watching Alistair now, examining him with interest as a whole range of emotions played across his face.

 

“Now love, I should go see to that cloak Josie wants you to wear, Alistair would you come with me, you might be able to help sort out some practicality for this.” The Commander offered warmly, but there was a hint of something else in that, _curiosity? Intrigue?_

Mira perked up at that offer and turned to Cullen with a smile. _Was he trying to get to know Alistair?_

 _Because of what she said earlier?_  He was going to make that effort for her?

 

Alistair nodded and gestured for Cullen to lead, he was still new to the keep and finding his way around, while Mira hung back, watching with a warm feeling as they talked amicably between themselves.

 

If Cullen decided that, maybe, he liked Alistair… then _maybe_ they could… maybe all three of them had a shot of pulling off something Mira could only dream about.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Laying the ground work for my OT3, because my brain will not let me get them all in bed without it making sense!  
> Also, we're getting DANGEROUSLY close to where i'm at with my writing so i'm going to try and slow down on my uploads from now.  
> But on another note I celebrated my birthday today! Another year older and another year of going to my favourite restaurant and stuffing my face with all my favourite food!


	26. Adamant

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Demons and Wardens and Falling, Oh my.

Chapter 26 - Adamant.

 

As the troops advanced on the fortress Mira only grew more and more nervous. There were more Warden Mages than they were expecting and that meant more demons. She was currently standing on the precipice of battle leaning over a table with Cullen and Alistair who both were discussing the plan of attack, Cullen pointing out choke points while Alistair tried to insist that there would be Wardens who would object and could even possibly help us against the demons.

Mira was standing there, making one last check of her equipment, she had been experimenting with a few breakable flasks that the Tempests used, trying to tweak their potency. Potions, flasks, daggers sharpened, armour clean and oiled. Still she was nervous, this was a battle on a larger scale than she’d ever had been a part of before and she was responsible for more lives than she was comfortable with. A figure head for an Army, her army.

She watched them from the top of their outlook, hidden in a silver cloak imprinted with the Inquisition insignia… a gift from Cullen, which Alistair helped him design.

 

Cullen stood at her side, silent and calming, occasionally seeking her out to sooth her with reassuring touches.

 

“Cullen, we’ve got this. We have to have this… What if we don’t come back…” Mira started in an attempt to sooth herself, brace herself for battle but she was worried. Worried that this would be too big, that she would fall short here.

“Mira, no matter what happens… you will survive, you will come back to me and I’ll come back to you.” Cullen promised, discarding his surroundings to bring her in close, pressing her into his chest as he promised her.

 

Alistair watched them for a moment, she knew the Calling was louder here, he’d told as much the other night around the camp fire but he put a brave face on for her all the same.

 

“Ah it’ll be alright Inquisitor; those demons and Wardens don’t stand a chance against us. We’re just too awesome.” Alistair joked trying to take the edge off their impending fight.

She was right though, this was bigger than anything else the Inquisition had faced so far… and bigger than anything else she’d faced.

Mira turned into Cullen’s shoulder, taking in one last deep breath before the battle. One last comfort with her lover… Alistair sighed softly, he would fight. Fight for the inquisitor… fight for her.

 

Nightfall came too quickly and with it, the battle. Inquisition soldiers and Wardens were fighting, falling all around… pointless waste of life. Cullen led the charge with his soldiers and Mira could only hope that he would be okay. Her team fought with determination, Dorian and Varric covering their backs while Blackwall, Alistair and she led the charge.

The fight raged, demons, abominations, and Wardens all trying to fight them, to kill them and so she had to kill them first, slaughter them in droves. She could hear Alistair plead with his brothers and sisters to stop this madness to join them or run, just stop fighting, stop following this malicious lie! Some even listened to him… many didn’t. She tried to spare as many as she could, preforming non-lethal tactics where applicable, attacks that could heal, that would stop them but save them.

It finally came to ahead when they reached the centre of the fort. Clarel was addressing the Wardens, inspiring them, preparing them for the fight and all the while Erimond whispered in her ear. Mira watched as she slit a poor girl’s throat, a girl she had spoken to in Crestwood… another causality to blood magic.

 

“Stop them, we must complete the ritual!” Erimond commanded viciously.

“Clarel, if you complete this ritual you’re doing exactly what Erimond wants!”

“What fighting the blight? Keeping the world safe? Who wouldn’t want that?!” Erimond shot back quickly. Mira looked at him in disgust, how could they be so blinded by that bastard! “And yes, the ritual requires blood sacrifice. Hate me for that if you must, but do not hate the Wardens for doing their duty.”

“We make the sacrifices no one else will. Our warriors die proudly for a world that will never thank them.” Clarel spoke with sincerity, Mira looked at her… she honestly believed she was doing the right thing. Mira was about to shout back when Alistair beat her to it.

 

“And then you’re Tevinter Magister BINDS THOSE MAGES TO CORYPHEUS!” he roared, angry at their stupidity. Clarel’s head snapped to look at Alistair, his conviction, his honesty rolling off the man in waves. She paused surprised and confused.

 

“Corypheus? But he’s dead…” shaken, confused, Mira watched as Clarel started to question herself.

“These people will say anything to shake your confidence, Clarel.” Erimond pounced whispering more lies in her ear, but it had started, she had started to doubt him. Mira watched hopeful that Alistair’s words had shaken something loose, had gotten through somehow.

“Bring it through.” Clarel spoke as if she had found that righteous stick up her arse again.

 

The Warden Mages acted, their warriors prepared themselves and Mira growled striding forwards to meet them head on.

“For Fucks sake Clarel! You’re being used! Just stop and let us explain!” she yelled, anger overtaking her for a moment.

“All you’ll be listening to is lies Clarel.” Erimond spat.

 

 

“Please, I have seen more than my share of blood magic! It is NEVER worth the cost!” Hawke pleaded, the same rage ran through her veins as well.

“If this were a fight against future Blights I would be at your side! Could you consider listening to me?” Alistair shouted.

 

“Be ready for the ritual, Clarel. This demon is truly worthy of your strength.” Erimond praised, but Mira glanced up and she could still see her doubts, she still hoped they could stop this!

 

“Wardens, Thedas owes you a debt it can never repay. You have saved us time and time again you have stopped the blight each and every time it’s risen. I would not be here if I wasn’t certain you are being misused! Your Mages are being bound to Corypheus though this ritual, Erimond is working with Corypheus! Please! See reason, I have spared all that I could! Only taken lives when I have absolutely had to! Clarel, stop this! Let us talk!” Mira called out with sincerity, tempering her anger somewhat.

She wouldn’t let this come to pass, she had to make them see sense!

 

“Clarel, we have come so far. You’re the only one who can do this.” Erimond pleaded, he feared what the Inquisitors words might stir.

“Perhaps we could test the truth of these charges, to avoid more bloodshed.” Clarel questioned, more like ordered. The Warden Commander had made up her mind.

Erimond’s face twisted in distain, “Or perhaps I should bring in a more reliable ally! My master thought you might come here, Inquisitor! He sent me this to welcome you!” he yelled hitting his staff on the ground.

 

And that’s when it went tits up, Erimond turned on Clarel and the Wardens as he summoned the Archdemon. Mira felt her stomach drop, the fear lancing up her body sparking the adrenaline and the need to survive. That roar, that terrifying screeching roar the dragon gave would haunt her nightmares.

With one order, “Help the Inquisitor!” Clarel put the full might of the Wardens to aid the of the Inquisition.

 

Clarel fought bravely, drawing the Archdemon’s attention and leading the beast away from the others, Mira followed leading her group into the fray, demons attacking from all sides, as the Archdemon circled overhead raining tainted fire down on them.

Clarel had Erimond corned, nowhere to go but to a very long drop off the bridge, Erimond sending spells at Clarel and Clarel instantly dispelling them, all the while forcing him closer and closer to the edge.

 

“You! You destroyed the Grey Wardens!” she snarled calling forth her magic to knock Erimond flying onto his back.

“You did that to yourself, you stupid bitch.” Erimond laughed weakly, “All I did was dangle a little power before your eyes, and you couldn’t _wait_ to get your hands bloody!”

 

Clarel didn’t take too kindly to his remarks as she sent a flash of lighting into his body, knocking him back towards the keep.

“You could have severed a new God.” Erimond whimpered now curling into himself.

“I will _Never_ serve the Blight!”

 

It was then Mira and her party finally came into view, she watched in horror as suddenly Clarel was captured by the jaws of that massive Archdemon! She watched as Clarel was carried up into the air, tossed around and spat out again, bleeding, mangled and probably dead from it.

 

Shit

Shit

OH SHIT!

The Archdemon had her in its sights, she glanced at her party and saw the same terrified expression over their face. The beast started backing them toward the ledge, toying with its prey.

 

“In War, Victory…”

It came closer still and Mira was wracking her mind on how to escape. Live, they had to live! She’d promised him, she promised Cullen.

“In Peace, Vigilance…”

The Archdemon, coiled like a tiger waiting to pounce on its prey. Mira glanced down at Clarel’s body, she had rolled over, magic crackling all around her.

The beat sprang and Clarel unleashed a deadly bolt of lightning which hit the Archdemon directly across its belly, surprising the best and causing it to falter, crashing with its momentum. Barely missing the Inquisitor and her team to come careening over the edge of the bridge and into the chasm below.

 

But then the worst happened. The dragons thrashing as it fell was caused the bridge to start collapsing, right under their feet.

 

Mira turned to flee like the rest of her party but in the shaking of the quickly collapsing stone, Alistair tripped!

_No, no not him!_

 

Her heart stopped, everything acted through instinct as she bolted to him, just as he was about to go over she pulled him up, with a strength she didn’t know she possessed. Then they ran, Ran for their very lives.

 

But it wasn’t enough! The bridge was falling, they were falling! Mira yelled, trying to do something! Anything to save them!

Then she felt it, hot searing pain joined with power and a green flash! The anchor, it was doing _something_. She tried, poured all she had into her mark and prayed to every god she could think of to save them.

 

Cullen’s words were echoing in her head ‘ _You will come back.’_

_I. Will. Come. Back._

**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A shorter chapter this week, but that's because the flow of the next chapter demanded it to be longer.


	27. The Fade

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Our hero's travel though the fade, where monsters made of memories try to kill them.

Chapter 27 - THE FADE 

The first thing Mira noticed was her hair, it had come loose in the fall and was now hanging around her face as she dangled upside down from the ground? How was the ground above her? She should touch it, it wasn’t right, it needed to be checked!

The moment her finger hit the stone she dropped with an unceremonious thud to the floor, crumpling into an uncomfortable ball. She stood quickly, this place stank of rot and fear.

 

“Ah, Well. This is unexpected.” Alistair spoke as if in shock… and he was standing sideways… horizontal to the ground, at least Mira thought it was the ground.

“Are you alright?” she asked as he hopped down to her level.

"I'm okay... thank you for saving me. I think." he soothed, well, _tried to_ as she checked him over worriedly.

 

"I've been better!" Varric called out sarcastically from where he'd landed in a pool on green gunk.

 

“We, we were falling? If this is the afterlife, the Chantry owes me an apology. This looks nothing like the Maker’s bosom.” Hawke mumbled sarcastically, she was standing on a much higher rock, examining their surroundings.

 

“No, the Inquisitor did something with the mark. Opened another Rift. I think… we’re in the fade.” Alistair theorised, “I’ve seen my father I the fade. I’ve seen a demon pretending to be my sister in the Fade… but I’ve never seen this.”. To say he was wary was an understatement... all his previous trips to the fade had been utter disasters.

 

“The first time I entered the Fade, it looked like a lovely castle filled with gold and silks. I met a marvellous Desire Demon, as I recall. We chatted and ate grapes before he attempted to possess me. Perhaps the difference is that we are here physically, this is no one’s dream.” Dorian explained.

 

“The stories say you walked out of the Fade at Haven. Was it like this?” Hawke asked.

“I- ummm maybe? I have no memory of what happened last time.” Mira shrugged while Alistair took up a defensive position next to her as a precaution.

“Well, whatever happened at Haven, we can’t assume we’re safe now.” Hawke sighed, “That huge demon was right on the other side of that rift Erimond was using, and there could be others.”

 

“In the real world, the Rift with the demons in it was nearby. In the main hall, can we get out the same way?” Alistair asked, hoping to provide a solution as he glanced over to Mira with a twinge of worry.

“Well, it sure beats waiting around for demons to find us?” Mira chuckled but Alistair watched as she gripped her blade tightly in her hand, keeping one out as a precaution.

 

Mira pointed up to the swirling green hole and gestured for the group to start moving towards it.

 

“This place is dangerous. I will gladly fight demons, but I have no desire to see where they come from.” Blackwall growled clearly more than a little unsettled.

“My visits to the Fade are normally more pleasant. I don’t usually wake up feeling the need to bathe.” Dorian remarked thoughtfully, “Usually, sometimes… well, never mind that.”

“So is this really what it’s like when you dream? How do you people ever sleep? Remember last time we ended up in the Fade, Hawke?” Varric asked with a twinge of humour.

 

“Oh how could I forget? My closest friends showed such loyalty in the face of a demon’s temptations.” Hawke smirked and continued walking.

“Yes well, we got better.” Varric chuckled, their commentary keeping the group calm.

 

 

They tried to move quickly through this cesspool of death, spirits of fear lingering, attacking when they got to close, water everywhere… maybe it came in through that rift in Crestwood? Maker even the thought of that hurt Mira’s head!

Alistair was staying close to her side, quiet but reassuring and she was grateful for it. They came to a set of stairs leading in the direction they wanted although, the _Thing_ that awaited them was someone nobody expected to see.

 

“What? That can’t be…” Alistair whispered in shocked surprise.

“I greet you Warden. And you, Champion.” The _Thing_ spoke.

“Divine Justinia?” Mira asked, it looked like her, sounded like her, well she didn’t know if she smelled like her… or what the Divine smelled like for that matter… probably old. The woman paused awaiting the Inquisitors response.

 

“Back at Haven, I saw… I thought I saw… How can you be here?” Mira questioned. She didn’t remember, she didn’t know what the hell was going on. The Divine had been there when the anchor exploded, could she have been pulled through as well? Could she have survived?’

“Mira, she isn’t. Things in the fade have a tendency to show up looking like people you know. Demons, mostly.” Alistair warned taking a step closer to Mira, protecting her from that _thing_.

 

“You think my survival impossible, yet here you stand alive in the Fade yourselves. In truth, proving my existence either way would require time we do not have.” The spirit spoke, calm, soft just like the divine should sound. Even if Mira had only seen her the once when she was younger. Her father had made her attend one of her sermons when they visited Val Royeaux, Mira had never been more bored in her life but at least the cathedral was pretty.

 

“Really? How hard is it to answer one question? I’m human and you are…” Hawke poked trying to elicit a response from the woman.

“I am here to help you.” The Divine spoke, yep Mira was just going to call her the Divine now.

 

“You do not remember what happened at the Temple of Sacred Ashes, Inquisitor.

“The real Divine would have no way of knowing that I’d been made Inquisitor.” Mira interjected. So, not the divine, just a spirit.

“I have learned that through watching the spirits here, the memories you have lost were taken by the demon that serves Corypheus. It is the nightmare you forget upon waking. It feeds off memories of fear and darkness. Growing fat upon the terror. The false Calling that terrified the Wardens into making such grave mistakes? Its work.”

 

“I’d like to have a few words with this Nightmare about that.” Alistair growled angrily. He’d been having trouble himself through the past few weeks. Waking up in the night with terrible nightmares, humming under his breath a tune the people around him had no hope of following, drifting out of conversations… distracted and terrified. And now to finally find the source of his troubles of all the Wardens troubles, Mira would gladly help him end it.

“You will get your chance, brave Warden. This place of darkness is its lair.”

 

“So that big demon Erimond was trying to bring through?” Mira asked.

“Yes.” The divine answered.

“It’s nearby?”

“Yes.”

“Well, Shit.” Mira sighed glancing at her group to see if they were ready for a fight, this was going to be a tough one.

 

“When you entered the Fade at Haven, the demon took a part of you. Before you do anything else, you must recover it. These are your memories, Inquisitor.” The Divine spoke and wraiths suddenly sprang up from nothing.

 

As quick as they appeared they started to attack and Mira and her team retaliated cutting through the wraiths with ease. Once each of them were down they left behind a swirling ball of energy that whispered and hissed when Mira came close, so familiar, so uniquely her that she had to touch it.

Words. Images, flashing before her eyes, splitting her head with a sharp resonating pain. The conclave. The Divine… captured by Corypheus. No. Wardens enslaved to Corypheus! They were killing her, using her life force to charge the anchor. Then she was there, interrupting, probably drunk, yes… she was, she had escaped her guards for the night but she couldn’t escape the conclave. So, she used her time to the best of her ability, getting blind drunk.

 

 

“Run while you can! Warn them!” the divine called out, Mira wasn’t quite drunk enough that she didn’t understand the situation. Corypheus oozed a terrifying sensation, it got under your skin, crawled into the deepest recesses of your mind and screamed at you to be cautious, that this was dangerous!

The orb, Corypheus was using the Divine to power the orb and then she… she knocked it, slapped it across the room and to her and- Fuck the pain! The anchor had seared her, burned the alcohol right out of her very bloodstream and then she… she opened the fade.

“So that mark on your hand… it wasn’t sent by Andraste. It came from that orb Corypheus was using.” Alistair soothed, he knew Mira never believed she was chosen that she was some Herald of Andraste.

“Corypheus intended to rip open the veil, use the Anchor to enter the Fade and throw open the doors to the Black City. Not for the Old Gods but for himself. When you disrupted his plan. The orb bestowed the Anchor upon you instead.” The Divine explained.

 

 

“Oh good, at least that means that the Maker has better taste than me. Now how does this help us get out of here or defeat this demon army or even destroy Corypheus! All this tells me is that I was in the wrong place at the wrong time, Yet again!” Mira growled, the memories returning had hurt like the worst hangover she’d ever had.

“I don’t have all the answers Mira but you cannot escape the lair of the nightmare until you regain all that it took from you. You have recovered some of yourself, but now it knows you are here. You must make haste! I will prepare the way ahead.”  As the divine finished she vanished leaving her and her companions to wonder her existence and fear what was to come… This whole place reeked of fear.

 

 

“What’s wrong Hawke?” Alistair asked as they started walking again.

“I wondered if you might be concerned about the Grey Wardens holding the Divine in that vision. Their actions led to her death.” Hawke sighed, mulling over what they saw. So they saw it to, Mira had to wonder if they could feel what she felt.

“I assumed Corypheus took their minds. You’ve seen it happen yourself.” Alistair explained, “Come on. You can add it to the things to yell at the wardens about when we get out of here.” He finished softly, that same hopeful kindness and warmth that underpinned his very existence spreading out to comfort a friend.

“Oh, I intend to.” Hawke grinned, noticing Alistair’s attempt.

 

Mira would not lose him to this nightmare. She would not lose anyone here!  They pressed on, now wary that the nightmare knew they were here. The group was chattering, psyching each other up and providing distraction from the practically overwhelming fear that permeated the air.

 

 

The water had soaked through her boots, making her slower, the stench and fear literally dragging her down but as quickly as the thought crossed her mind, that she wasn’t going to survive this. Alistair was there with a gentle hand to her elbow, reassurance, hope…love. At least that what he hoped he conveyed, he wasn’t going to let her suffer alone, not when he could help.

 

 

“Ah, we have a visitor. Some silly little girl comes to steal the fear I so kindly lifted from her shoulders. You should have thanked me and left your fear where it lay, forgotten. You think that pain will make you stronger? What fool filled your mind with such drivel? The only one who grows stronger from your fears is me. But you are a guest here in my home, so by all means let me return what you have forgotten!”  The voice spoke, cold, calculating and cruel. Like it was looking into the darkest recesses of your heart and plucking its strings a skilfully as a harp.

 

 

 

Demons. Everywhere! Mira lunged, using the fear to quicken her movements, strike deeper, harder until all her enemies lay dead at her feet.

These were just demons, nothing she hadn’t encountered before.

 

“I expected worse?” Blackwall growled, pulling his sword from the fallen carcass of a shade demon.

“I suspect these are just minor servants of the nightmare.” Dorian theorised, Thank the maker for her 2nd favourite mage, she would have surely been dead without him.

“Pity.” Blackwall grinned cheekily and again they pressed on.

The party pressed on, brushing past the fears of dreamers on their way. They had to keep moving, they had to get out.

 

They came down a flight of stairs and Mira stopped, everything around her stopped. The man in front of her, the man she knew… tall, obnoxiously ginger hair and with that love-struck grin slapped to his face. Her mage, her safe haven.

_Finn_.

 

He was there! He was right in front of her! He safe, healthy and smiling as brightly as the day they married.

 

“Mira my dear. It’s been so long.” He smiled, arms open inviting her in. She wanted to go, even for a second. He was alive, right there in front of her then that meant that she hadn’t gotten him killed, she wasn’t responsible for his death!

 

“Mira please. Come here love, let me look at my beautiful wife.” He asked softly drawing her forwards and she came willingly. “Please, this place is so horrible, let’s go home. We could make Ferelden stew and I’ll tell you a story, the one about the Warden, you love that story!” he sighed, still as picky as ever… and kind, oh so kind.

She walked slowly, she couldn’t quite believe it but she wanted to… desperately. He was so close… just close enough she could just reach out for him.

 

“Maker’s breath what is that _Thing!_ ” Blackwall shouted before charging forwards, coming closer and closer with a rage that she saw only in battle. His sword swung high in the air and Mira tracked the arch. She was overcome with terror, every fibre of her being trying to _will_ herself forwards to take the blow but she was frozen, watching in horror as it came crashing down into Finns body. Her Finn!

 

“No **. NO!** What are you doing! WHA- AH! FUCK!” Mira shouted in shock and confusion as the _Thing_ she thought was Finn crumpled and hissed into nothing before she was quickly blindsided by another Finn.

 

“You let them kill me Mira. You lead those Templars to our house. It was your fault! IT IS ALL YOUR FAULT!” Finn was screaming at her. His ginger hair, hair that she used to run her fingers through was falling out in clumps, his skin was burnt, charred, rippling underneath with oozing pus.

She wanted to be sick. She wanted to run or cry but he kept coming for her, flesh melting off his fingers to transform into bony claws. She hesitated, just for a split second, just long enough for one of those claws to catch her in a deep slash through her brow and against her cheek.

 

The claw split the skin deep, blood rushing into her eye, blinding her. He cut her. Finn cut her! He would never… _never._

 

Mira reacted, _violently_. She managed to knock him off quickly, crying out with a terrifying Battle Cry as she smashed a glass of fire and went barrelling into the fray. Now that the illusion had been broken she could see them. Fears, all of them malicious and malformed giant spiders that crawled around her friends. She acted quickly cutting them down and burning the remains.

 

 

The party paused, they’d noticed Mira was injured but mostly they had been shaken. Nobody had expected to see the terrors they saw.

She stopped, hopping up to sit on a rock while she tried to stop the bleeding with the scarf she wore around her neck.

 

Alistair was by her side in a heartbeat, taking the scarf from her fingers before fishing out a healing poultice from his pocket.

“Hey, look down, let me fix you up.” He spoke softly, he was no doubt shaken by his own fears but the moment he saw her hurt he pushed all that aside. He had a job to do and he had to help her, she was the only one who could get them out of here, his feelings for her were secondary at this point. He knew that but he couldn’t help it at this point. She was terrified and it pulled at him, deeply.

 

“Here we go, just a little bit more.” He soothed dabbing at her wound as he applied the poultice.

 

She was quiet, compliant putty in his hands as he let the poultice do its work and stem the bleeding. She was going to have one striking scar.

“Give to me straight doc. Am I still pretty?” she asked squinting through one eye with a completely serious expression on her face.

“Most beautiful woman I know, and even sexier now.” He replied honestly with that sweet smile. It made her laugh and that’s all that mattered. She was smiling as her hand found his cheek.

“Thank you.” Her eyes flickered down to his lips, the fingers on his cheek stroked gently, her finger tips the only skin touching his.

 

He could feel his cheeks heat up as his eyes flickered down to her lips, he couldn’t resist it, resist her anymore. He quickly slid his hand across her cheek to cradle her head as he lent in and kissed her.

It was soft, tender even but it had a heat behind it. Alistair melted into it and moaned in surprise when Mira leaned into him as well. He felt the beautiful stuttering moan under his lips before she opened hers and pulled him closer.

His heart was racing, all notion of the terrors around them burned out of his conscious with a white-hot flash of pure excitement. He was kissing her! And she was kissing back! He knew how she tasted now, taste of her lips, her skin. Now he was just working on memorising the feel of them.

 

“Hate to interrupt buut you know. Monsters? Demons? Imminent Death?” Hawke smirked, tapping on Alistair’s shoulder with what could possibly be described as a shit eating grin.

Both Mira and Alistair jumped in surprise, breaking apart before coming back to their surroundings. The Fade was no place to be kissing the Inquisitor.

 

“Right. You’re right. Alistair are we good?” Mira asked, brushing off her armour as she stood up and retrieved her blades.

“Yeah, I mean was it, um, I- are you uh- “ he stumbled over his words, blushing like a chantry mouse.

 

“I meant my face Alistair.”

 

“Lovely face…. very kissable lips.” He mumbled near the end.

“Alistair! _Later_. We’re good to go. Everyone else good to move out?” Mira asked, returning to her role as leader. With a, round of acknowledging grunts and a teasing elbow from Dorian the group pressed on.

 

 

 

“Perhaps I should be afraid, facing the most powerful members of the Inquisition.” The creature laughed above their heads once another wave of demons had been cut down. Mira gave a quick look around and signalled to keep moving.

 

“Like Blackwall. Ah, there’s nothing like a Grey Warden, and you are nothing like a _Grey Warden_.” The creature continued, it was singling them out now, preying on their fears, they had to stay strong.

“I’ll show you a Wardens strength, beast.” He growled back and Mira was proud of him. If they could withstand this, they will win, they will survive.

 

But the creature wouldn’t stop, it kept going, kept listing their fears for everyone to hear.

“Greetings, Dorian… It is Dorian, isn’t it? For a moment, I mistook you for your father.” It hissed.

“Well that’s rather uncalled for!” Dorian mocked with irritation.

 

The group moved on but the creature kept going.

“Once again, Hawke is in danger because of you, Varric. You found the Red Lyrium. You brought Hawke here…”

“Just keep talking, Smiley.”

 

The creature replied with a laugh that made the whole groups skin crawl.

“How bout we don’t make the creepy nightmare monster laugh huh?” Alistair pondered with a lopsided smile.

“Oh? Did the King’s Bastard think he could prove himself? It is far too late for that.” The beast growled, “Your whole life, you’ve left everything to more capable hands. The Archdemon, the Throne of Ferelden. Who will you hide behind now?”

“Is that all it’s got? I’ve heard worse than that from Morrigan.” Alistair sneered, there was anger in his voice again… and the demon noticed that.

“Ah but what about Audrey? Have you heard from her since you told her you wished she’d died with the Archdemon? People do very silly things when they think they’re dying Alistair… Very silly things.” It laughed, horrid and vicious as it snuck that wicked thought into his head.

 

He froze for a moment. The creature was right… he hadn’t heard anything from her in years… no one had… what if. _What if?_

Mira was there in an instant, her daggers covered in slime and demoney bits, much like the rest of her but she was there if he needed her, a gesture in which he deeply appreciated… although it really did seem as though nothing was outside of this demon’s purview.

 

 

“Oh, and what of you Mira, how is your husband? Is he well? Oh that’s right, he’s dead because of you. Everyone you love is dead, Alistair’s already hearing his Calling, he is dying. And what makes you think Cullen’s going to survive. He could be dead already and it will be your fault Inquisitor. You kill everything you love.”

Mira went to reply with a few scathing curses her mouth opening with a deep breath but the creature beat her to it.

 

“Don’t worry your pretty head, we both know there’s only one thing that your mouth is good for. The Knight-Captain saw to that.” Mira paused, rage filling her every pore.

 

 

Alistair stayed close, much like she had done for him not movements before. Mira was angry now, that anger was overriding the fear making her fight harder, faster and more viciously than she had ever had cause to before.

The Divine or the spirit continued to help them, managing to force the creature to revel its weakness with a clever twist of the tongue. If they banished the Nightmare, Corypheus loses his demon army and the Warden Mages are freed.

“Careful now the beast is just up ahead.” The divine warned as they continued to run.

The creature they found ahead of them was huge. Like the size of fucking Skyhold huge! Internally Mira started to panic, how the hell where they going to get by that thing!?

 

 

“If you would please tell Leliana, I’m Sorry. I failed her to.” The Divine or her spirit asked as she sacrificed herself, hurtling herself and her energy into the giant monster, stunning it in a blinding flash of light, banishing it if only for a moment so that they had a chance, a chance to escape.

                                                                                                                                                                                

The group now had one target, one monster to defeat, one Fear demon. Mira went after it with all the rage she could muster smashing her last ice flask to slow the beast down and end this fight quickly, she tore and shattered its long arachnid limbs with her daggers with blinding speed. Strength and butchering slashes, were provided by Alistair and Blackwall, as Dorian and Varric kept the majority of little beasties from them, providing ranged support as well as minor healing from Hawke. It didn’t take long to defeat the Fear demon, the group worked efficiently, sustaining only minor injuries in the battle and Mira was immensely satisfied with its bloody carcass hitting the ground mere minutes after the ice had worn off.

 

The rift, it was clear! With a quick signal, the majority of her party made a sprint for the rift, however Alistair, Hawke and herself were further back, they had wanted to make sure the thing was really dead and provide cover from the number of smaller terrors that still assaulted the group. With the last one downed by one of Hawkes crackling chain lightning spells, the trio saw their chance to escape. Mira moved first, tired, and exhausted body pushing itself towards the point of collapse, she was running on pure adrenaline and fear at this point.

Hawke slowed and Alistair quickly following her eye line to the terror that loomed above them and quickly skidded to a stop. Mira was still running, frantically gesturing for them to follow, aiming for the rift… until she got cut short by a giant claw slamming mere inches in front of her, barely missing slicing her in half. Surprised, she berated herself for no realising sooner and quickly jumped back to the other two companions.

Mira looked up in horror and disgust, because it really was one disgusting creature. Like a crab that had the blight…. And had possibly mated with a squid? But yeah gross.

 

 

“How do we get by!?” Alistair called over the noise of the creature, he was searching for it, his solution, with his sword at the ready and standing close to Mira. Always close, just in case.

“Go. I’ll cover you!” Hawke shouted back, staff at the ready, her expression not one to be argued with!

 

“No. You were right, the Wardens caused this mess. A Warden must-“Alistair started but he was cut off by both Hawke and the heart-wrenching look on Mira’s face. Maker he never wanted her to have to make that face again, but it was the right thing to do. They would be safe, _ **she would be safe,**_ if he did this.

 

“A Warden must help them rebuild! That’s your job! Corypheus is mine.” Hawke growled.

The monster was closing in, almost playing with them like food. The choice was hers, the responsibility …. Consequences… No.

 

“No. NO! I am not losing anyone else to the fucking Fade!” Mira yelled angrily startling both of them, “Marian, I’ll provide the two of you cover. Alistair, you get through that rift-” Alistair cut in with a quick and sharp rejection of that idea, there was no way in the Void he was going to leave her here, but Mira just powered through.

 

 

“ **Shut up!** ” she snapped at Alistair before whipping her head back round to Hawke, “Once he’s through Marian you have to provide cover for me and we will get out! Got it, now **_MOVE_**!”

 

 

The beast was fast approaching and Mira wasn’t going to give them the opportunity to argue. Alistair stalled a second, a look of terror passed over his face as Mira turned and hurtled towards the beast smashing glass after glass of fire until she burned so hot she was hard to look at.

 

“Alistair move your ass, the faster you’re through, the faster I can help the Inquisitor!” Hawke yelled at him, Alistair nodded, the fear no less diminished though. She had to survive, she was the key to this whole thing and yet here he was running away.

He was sprinting, Hawke close at his side. He could hear the hiss of Mira’s fire behind him, the angered screeches of the creature she was cutting into.

 

** “Now Inquisitor!” **

 

Hawke started firing off a volley of flame and lightning spells, forcing the magic to curve high over the creature and hit it on the opposite side as so to draw its attention, giving Mira very, very brief window to run. The Nightmare was quick, far too intelligent for a simple demon, it caught onto the ruse within moments.

Mira was running, as fast as she could, Hawke flinging spell after spell above her to which she added every grenade she was carrying setting them off behind her as she ran in the hopes that it would slow the nightmare.

 

 

“Marian, Marian move! Now!” Mira shouted, the nightmare was moving too fast, it was too close. Marian started to cast a spell, a big one, one last attempt to slow the nightmare and buy them a chance to escape, she cast, lightning and fire raining down all around them. The nightmare hissed and thrashed in anger and pain, it started to lash out with its claws and limbs. The ground shook underfoot making it that much harder to run.

 

With a terrible screech, the nightmare lashed out with one of its long, ugly claws, catching Mira on her shoulder. The attack sliced through her armour like butter and crushed the metal into her skin. Mira shouted in pain but kept moving they had to keep moving, stumbling the last few steps to the rift. Hawke caught her and flung them both through the rift firing spells as they fell, with demon still screeching on the other side.

 

**

 

On the other side of the rift Alistair was met with a horde of demons and spirits, both the Wardens and Inquisition were fighting to the best of their ability but they were overwhelmed, exhausted so Alistair joined the fight, cutting down demons and terrors on all sides. He was waiting, hoping, praying for both of their safe return.

Behind him the rift crackled as if announcing another demons approach. Alistair readied his sword and shield and hoped against hope that it would be them this time, that the pair of them Hawke and Mira would come tumbling out of that rift unharmed and victorious.

 

He got his wish, even if it were only partly true. The pair of them, both Mira and Hawke came crashing through the rift with a the furry and fire of a rage demon, Hawke was still firing spells back into the rift and Mira was still smouldering and smoking from her fire flasks. They crashed into the ground with a heavy thump and sprawled limbs, Hawkes hands still channelling magic through her staff as Mira quickly righted herself to close the rift.

 

The wound on her face was bleeding again and it looked like she’d really hurt her shoulder as she held up her hand to close the rift.

 

Her mark crackled with power, the rift started to close and there was blood dripping from her hand. With one last angry yell, Mira closed the rift! Freeing both the Warden mages from the Nightmare and banishing the demons. There was a mighty cheer of relief as everyone realised the fight was over, the sound was overwhelming and relieving. They had survived, they had all survived!

 

And now he could feel exactly how many ribs he’d broken and which of his muscles had been seriously overstrained, but Mira was there, she had saved them.

 

“So no demon army for Corypheus, it appears. The Divine – or her Spirit – was right.” Alistair smiled, limping over, he could feel every one of his muscles seizing up. Mira was gasping, catching her breath while Hawke had taken to lying flat on the ground with a bottle of Lyrium as Mira started wiping the blood from her eye.

“You know that’s not how they see it, though. They just saw their inquisitor work another miracle.” Alistair grinned cheekily, it made Mira chuckle though. He was just so happy to see her safe. Maker if she'd died in that place... he wouldn't... _he wouldn't be able to live with himself._

 

“Ha, they came out of this alive. As far as I’m concerned they can tell whatever stories they like.” Mira grinned, the blood running down her arm seemed to have tapered off and it she didn’t seem overly bothered by it, probably trying to seem more Inquisitor-y.

“I suppose, “The Inquisitor and her Handsome Warden friend escaped by the skin of their teeth wouldn’t be as good for morale.” He smiled moving closer and gesturing to her arm, she followed the gesture and nodded in consent and allowed him to dig around in his tunic for a healing poultice. They seemed to have developed a pattern.

 

“Inquisitor, the Archdemon flew off as soon as you disappeared. The Venatori Magister is unconscious but alive, Cullen though you might wish to deal with him yourself.” A runner informed and both Mira let out a little sigh of relief with the news that Cullen was alright, a reaction that Alistair didn’t miss, “As for the Wardens, those who weren’t corrupted helped us fight the demons.”

There was a Warden in full armour standing next to the runner, he saluted respectfully before speaking, “We stand ready to make up for Clarel’s … tragic mistake.”

 

“Inquisitor, are any of your party in need of immediate medical attention?” the runner asked quickly.

Mira looked around for a second, “Make the rounds, and make sure Hawke gets some more Lyrium potions if it wasn’t for her and her magic… I wouldn’t be standing here, alive.” She smiled, again trying to reinforce that magic was a good thing. The runner nodded and quickly a group of healers descended.

 

“Alistair, you’re the senior surviving Grey Warden. What do we do now?” the armoured Warden informed and Alistair looked up to Mira, they both knew what had to be done…. But if Mira tweaked the rules slightly, who was really going to stop her now?

“You stay and do whatever you can to help. Alistair believes that the Wardens are worth saving… and I trust him, as such Alistair will advise the Inquisition as Commander of the Grey from Skyhold. You’re still vulnerable to Corypheus and possibly his Venatori, but there are plenty of demons that need killing.” Mira ordered firmly.

“While they’re doing that, I’ll inform the Wardens at Weisshaupt, they’ll want to know what happened.” Hawke added from a now sitting position as she leant on Varric for support.

“Thank you, your worship. We will not fail you.” The armoured Warden bowed before leaving.

 

Mira wobbled slightly, now suddenly realising how much she hurt, was that her armour sticking into her back? When did that break? When the nightmare hit her most likely.

 

“Alistair, would you accompany me back to my tent, we have plans we need to discuss.” Mira asked just loud enough for anyone around them to hear. Alistair agreed quickly, the pair began to head off, that was until Alistair noticed how the Inquisitor was limping and quickly ducked down to sling her arm over his shoulder and take some of her weight. He would have just swept her into his arms but he thought he might actually collapse if he attempted that now.

 

 

The pair of them limped into the tent that had been set up for her just outside the walls of Adamant and both of them quickly collapsed into each other. They had a few moments, the healer was on their way, they could breathe.

 

“You’re alive, oh thank the fucking maker you’re alive.” Alistair whispered into her hair. She smelled of fire and death but she was here, still breathing in his arms. She clung to him just as tightly as he was clinging to her.

“I’m sorry I shouted at you there, I’m so sorry Alistair. I was so scared I’d lose someone, I just had to make sure you were going to be safe.” Mira whimpered against his jaw, he could feel her unsteady breathing.

 

He pulled her back to look at her, the cut on her face was smeared with dried blood and she was tucking her shoulder closer, trying to hide from the pain.

 

“Hey, it’s alright. I know, I was just as afraid but let’s look after you first.” He told her, guiding her to sit on the edge of her cot. Together they worked out the broken amour from Mira’s shoulder, just too free her up a bit so she wasn’t in so much pain. To get to it he had to help her out of her coat and metal work and help her peel the bloody fabric off her arm. She sat there in her sturdy breast band, holding her ruined shirt over her chest before he moved to clean her face.

He grabbed a cloth and clean water before he started to dab away the blood from around the wound. They sat opposite each other, much like they had done in the Fade. Alistair’s hands attentive and gentle as he cleaned the wound, they were quiet, both so exhausted that they just wanted to collapse into the dirt.

 

That’s when Alistair noticed it… or rather noticed what was now missing.

 

“I just realised, I can’t hear it anymore.” He breathed quietly, almost shocked at the little revelation. “The calling. I can’t hear it anymore.” He was smiling, practically beaming!

“The Calling’s gone? You’re not dying!” she smiled back happily, she cupped his cheek to stroke her thumb across his jaw reassuringly.

“You did it. You saved me.” He said softly, he was already leaning into her lips again. Maker she was irresistible. He wanted to thank her, worship her… love her. But she pulled back, hesitated just enough for Alistair to remember who she was… and who she was with. His face crumbled as he pulled back.

 

“Alistair no, wait. It’s not that I don’t want to because I really, really do, it’s just that we have to do this right. I am not about to hurt Cullen by letting this go somewhere without thinking it through.” She told him, pulling on her serious face. She had to many opportunities to use that face tonight, he didn’t want to add to her burdens.

“Mira I don’t want to make things harder for you. I just…” he sighed, he was at a loss for words. He knew he cared for her… a lot, he would go as far to say he loved her but he didn’t want to lay this all at her feet and make her job harder for her. She had Cullen, he should just lay off.

 

“I know and I want you to. I already spoke to Cullen before… before you two fought in the training circle. I suggested that we all get together, _in bed_ ,” she emphasised those last words, “and maybe we could see how things went from there. I’m fully on board and that was before I- we- had these- _fade kissing thing._ ”

“Wait, you talked to Cullen about me? What did he um say?” he asked suddenly feeling ten times more nervous.

“He said he wanted to think about it some more and I respect that. I won’t move unless it’s everyone choice, yours too. We’re a package deal me and Cullen, so may-be, if you like, _win him over?”_ she suggested with a small smile, one which Alistair returned. He nodded slowly, understanding what she had in mind and to be honest, he liked it.

 

All he had to do was win over Cullen? … Ah… that might be easier said than done.  Especially since he didn’t have the best track record when it came to loved ones…

 

 

“Inquisitor? Inquisitor Are you in there?” Came Cullen’s voice through the tent flaps. “I brought a healer, Dorian mentioned you needed one- Mira?” he stopped short just inside the tent, frozen there for a moment when he saw her face.

“What happened!? Are you alright? Medic get in here!” Cullen barked behind him before he came down to sit at Mira’s side, cupping her face gently to inspect her newest scar.

“I’m fine Cullen, bit banged up sure. But at least we all came out alive that’s what counts.” She soothed her worried Commander, nuzzling her good cheek into his hand before the healer came in.

 

Alistair was still sat on the floor while the healer worked on Mira. He listened to Mira explain what happened in the fade to Cullen, helpfully adding in details when Mira would occasionally wince in pain or a memory.

“It seems I have a lot to thank you for Alistair.” Cullen remarked softly, the healer was just about finished with Mira and it was obvious to all that she was just about on the edge of sleep.

 

“Aw there’s no need. Mira is…very dear, I wasn’t about to let anything hurt her… and when they did, I only wanted to help.” Alistair smiled, that offhand kind of smile that deflected what he was truly thinking.

“Still, _Thank you_ , thank you for helping bring everyone back. When I heard that you’d fallen into a rift… I feared the worst.” Cullen admitted quietly, just for Alistair’s ears. Alistair paused just for a moment while Cullen griped onto his arm in a traditional Ferelden handshake, reserved for moments of importance or great thanks.

“You know I would give my life for her in a heartbeat but she had a plan, a mad plan to get us all out and it worked. I’m just grateful to be here.” Alistair admitted but the look in Cullen’s eyes softened slightly… maybe Mira’s plan of winning him over wasn’t so mad after all?

 

“Commander? Milady Inquisitor’s falling asleep, there’s nothing more I can do tonight. Her shoulder has been cleaned, salved and bandaged and I’ve done what I can for the cut on her face, the wound was deep but thanks to the warden’s quick thinking with the poultice it’s not infected. I’ve managed to seal it with magic but it will scar, I might be able to lessen the intensity with regular check-ups and healing on the way back to Skyhold if milady wishes.” The healer informed, the young woman was exhausted.

“Thank you. Make sure you get some hot food and rest alright? Don’t overwork yourself, you’ve done good work.” He told her seriously before she saluted and dismissed herself.

 

“I should be heading off. Take care, see you tomorrow Cullen, Mira.” Alistair nodded to each of them, with Mira barely keeping her eyes open from the cot before he left, following behind the medic to grab one of her salves.

 

Cullen came to her, inspecting every inch of her form ever so gently, hands that mere hours ago were fighting for their lives, now soothing her with such a reverence that she barely registered what he was doing until she looked at him.

“I worried you? When we fell in the rift?” Mira asked tiredly, now that everyone was gone she could get undressed properly and try to clean off some of the gunk before collapsing into bed.

“Worried would be an understatement… I thought I lost you. I- I am so relieved you’re here, that you’re safe.” He sighed, rubbing the ache in the back of his neck before helping her out of her armour. The only thing that was left were her trousers and boots, but her shoulder had seized up so he helped her before grabbing the jug of water to help wash away the worst of the gunk.

 

“It was… a very close call. The demon, the nightmare it knew things. It knew exactly what would hurt us the most… If Alistair hadn’t been there to keep me going, I’m not sure I would have gotten everyone out.”

 

Cullen paused, he had just wiped the dirt away from the back of her neck, “But you did get out, You came back and you saved everyone, Mira, we won.” He soothed, pressing a kiss into her now clean nape.

“I almost didn’t, the nightmare… it showed me Finn and I froze… I thought it was him, that somehow I’d found him in the fade and I wanted to believe that Cullen, so much.” She almost whispered that, as if she was afraid to talk about it.

 

“What happened?” he asked cautiously, neither Alistair or her mentioned this before while the healer patched her up.

“He wanted me to come home, he put his arms out like he used to do whenever I came back from work and then Blackwall cut him down. We weren’t seeing the same thing, they were demons… and then I got blindsided by another Finn. It was horrible. He was burnt, like he’d just stepped off the pyre the Templars burned him with. He said it was all my fault and I just stood there, well until this.” She pointed to her face.

“Mira.” He whispered, pulling her closer to try and comfort her. She allowed it for a moment before she continued.

 

“I just wanted everything to stop after that but Alistair was there, he helped stop it from bleeding… and then we kissed.” She admitted suddenly.

 

“I’m sorry, what?” Cullen reeled slightly.

 

“We’d both been shaken, it was very emotional and right what I needed to keep going. But that’s all that happened, we kissed in the fade when tensions were high, I swear it will go no further if you object. I love you Cullen, you come first in this relationship I will not pursue anything without your consent first but I will be honest, I am very fond of Alistair and I would like to explore what’s going on here.” Mira spoke honestly, he knew she was too tired to do otherwise as she laid out all her cards.

 

Cullen softened, her hair was everywhere, singed at the ends, dirt and guck was splattered over her body. She’d literally just gone through the void and here she was trying to reassure him while also asking him permission for the both of them to invite another person in for them to love, a person who had shown time and time again his willingness to protect her, to care for her… a person who Cullen considered to be a close friend.

 

“You have it, my consent I mean. Alistair has… he’s impressed me and it’s obvious how he cares about you and I want to explore what this could be.” He smiled, bringing her in gently so he could press kisses into the side of her head.

Mira sighed in relief before melting into him, hand coming to rest around his hips as she was too tired to raise them up to his shoulders.

 

 

“Come love, let’s get you into bed.” He muttered, guiding his love towards the cot, she was practically asleep on her feet as she stumbled in his grasp.

“You come to.” She mumbled back, face already pressed against the pillow as Cullen quickly removed the bulkier parts of his armour, leaving his shirt and trousers on in case he needed to quickly redress for an emergency.

 

He got into bed behind her, rearranging themselves to that they were face-to-face and Mira’s bad shoulder was up out of the way. Cullen even made sure to pull the blanket around her, night’s in the approach got as cold as they do at Skyhold... and Mira always ran cold.

“I love you.” He told her quietly as he pressed a soft kiss to her lips. Her lips moved back to form the words but all that came out was a tired breath and sounds in the rhythm of ‘ _I love you too’,_ as she swiftly fell into a deep sleep.

 

**


	28. Mira's Nightmare.

Chapter 28- Mira's Nightmare.

 

 

It was dark, the green mire swirling all around her… just like it did in the fade. She felt trapped, like there were something holding her here, blocking her every move leaving her sluggish and weak. An easy meal, ripe for the picking.

 

_Did the silly little girl really think she’d escaped?_

She whipped around trying to find the source of the voice, only to be met with more floating rock. She ran, trying to get away through a narrow passage before the mire shifted again.

 

 

_Mira, Mira, Mira. Did you think you could run from me? Did you think I wouldn’t find you in the fade?_

She twisted, the rocks scraping her skin as she tried to flee.

 

Suddenly her surroundings… _Melted._ The rocks dripped and fell into a swirling green pool that seemed to ripple beneath her feet. A long black vine reached out to caress her ankle, wrapping itself around her firmly as more slithered out from the deep.

The creature, wet and slimy from the pool tried to capture her but she fought, tearing off the appendages as they tried to ensnare her. The creature seemingly amused by her struggle, taunted her, kept her distracted by trying to pull her into the pool while a mass of black ooze took from behind her.

 

A hand caught her by the throat, pulling her back against this humanoid form, it’s skin black and flaking magical specs that turned green like the fade around them. She struggled, trying desperately to get away.

_Stupid girl, your lover is dead, my minions killed Cullen while you were off gallivanting in the Fade. What you have is but a demon, sent to kill you when your guard’s down, sent to kill you while you sleep…_ The creature… the Demon, whispered in her ear as it held her close as it slid its free hand and vines up her body.

_Shall I wear his skin next? Shall I touch you oh so tenderly, wait until you want me so much… that you’d let me into that pretty head without hesitation._

It spoke, nuzzling into her neck as it choked her, groping along her body as it tried to drown her in black.

She couldn’t breathe, everything was turning black.

She has to get out, she has to stop this.

 

_She has to fight._

                                                                                                    

** 

                                                                                                                                                                                 

 

Mira awoke with a start, frightened, and confused. The deep sleep still had a hold on her and all she could hear was the nightmares voice ringing in her ears.

“Mira? Wha-” Cullen mumbled sleepily. Mira jumped, terrified by his sudden input.

_He is a demon sent to kill you, you stupid girl. Fight or He’ll kill you!_

 

Mira panicked, gasping for the breath her nightmare denied her. She believed the voice in her head, that she was in danger, that Cullen was going to kill her, she had to act fast if she was going to survive.

Her hands went around his neck, he was unguarded believing he was safe with her before she started to squeeze and try to escape his grasp at the same time, keeping him at arm’s length. _Reason wasn’t the thing commanding her actions now._

Cullen’s eyes went wide in shock when he realised what she was doing, his hand clamped around her wrists in an attempt to stop her from choking him.

 

“Mira? Mira it’s me! What are you doing!” he gasped, she was strong when she needed to be, and she was quickly crushing his neck.

“It’s not! You’re going to kill me!” she panted harshly, shaking him as she did so. Cullen realised she was in full panic mode… Nightmares from the fade.

He tried to speak again, tried to find a way out of her hold. He shifted to flip her over, but she felt it, felt his muscle move between her thighs and rammed her knee into his already bruised ribs.

She was hissing at him on the edge of hysteria. “You killed him Demon, you wear his skin, but you will _not have me!”_

 

 

“Mira it’s me. I swear it’s me. I will never hurt you.” He told her earnestly whilst struggling for breath, slowly and with a great deal of faith he removed his hands from around her wrists and held them up in surrender.

 

“ _Please, love.”_

 

Mira frowned at his surrender, confused at his actions. She squeezed tighter for a moment, to test his resolve but when Cullen remained pliant she started to panic… her fear only grew.

With a start, she released her grasp from around her lover’s neck and tore herself out of bed, trying to get as far away from him as possible. Cullen was gasping, coughing as the pressure came off from his neck and his airways opened again. Mira was sitting there, sprawled out, half-dressed on the opposite side of the tent as she stared at him, slowly coming to realise what she’d done.

She looked at her hands, hands that were quickly growing red as the blood quickly returned to her fingers.

 

_Oh no. oh maker no, what did I do?_

 

“ _Mi_ -“ Cullen wheezed before coughing violently.

Cullen was still coughing when he started to move, to make sure she was alright. Mira flinched as he came closer before frantically grabbing a cloak and backing up towards the opening of the tent.

She was terrified, _What did she just do!_ She needed to get away, she needed to get far away from him, so she couldn’t hurt him again, But she just kept starting at the bruises on his neck.

 

_ You kill everything you love. _

 

“I-I’m sorry.” She whispered before she fled. Cullen’s rough and strangled shouts trailing behind her as she ran.

 

**

 

Mira ran, trying to get far enough away from everyone so she could break. To not be the strong, powerful Inquisitor but to just be the awful mess that was her.

The sand under her feet was still warm from the day, getting caught between her toes as she ran for the edge of camp. The tears were beginning to build in her eyes. _I hurt him, I tried to kill him_. _Maker how do I always manage to fuck everything up!_ She pulled the cloak around her tighter, hiding her face beneath its hood as the tears threatened to fall.

She was running blind, through the tears, the darkness and the hood she didn’t see the figure step out of the tent until it was too late. She collided with them sending the both of them sprawling into the sand.

 

“Ah! What the-?? Mira?” the figure groaned as they picked themselves out of the tangle of limbs.

_Alistair_.

Of course, it had to be him.

 

Mira pulled away sharply and scrambled to her feet looking to flee again. She managed it too, getting up quicker than the stunned man who was still on the ground by the time she ran off again.

_Booze, she needed booze and somewhere to calm the fuck down_.

She made a quick detour, managing to slip into a stealth to pilfer a bottle of wine left out by the mess before slipping out of camp, heading for a rocky outcrop just over the nearest dune.

 

**

 

Alistair was just getting up out of the sand when a panicked Cullen rushed towards him. _Maker’s breath he just came out to get some air, it’s bloody stuffy in his tent._

 

“Have you seen the Inquisitor?” Cullen rasped, his hand was around his throat, rubbing at it.

“Yes, not five minutes ago, what’s going on?” Alistair demanded, she seemed freaked out and now Cullen was freaked out, it was all just freaking him out!

“She had a nightmare, she thought I was a demon trying to kill her. She’s confused and now she’s run off, I have to make sure she’s alright!” Cullen told him in a panicked breath, waving his arms around frantically. Letting Alistair see the finger shaped bruises around his neck.

 

“Ah, ‘ _you kill everything you love._ ’ The nightmare taunted her with that in the fade it told her that you were already dead, it was trying to make her snap. It didn’t work then but I guess it stuck with her.” Alistair explained as he started to lead Cullen in the direction he saw Mira run off into.

“We have to hurry.” Cullen urged as they started to hunt for his love.

**

                                                                                                                                                                                

Mira sniffled slightly, the tears were long gone… along with half a bottle of wine, white wine- _gross-_ but it was better than nothing. The wound on her face stung from the drying tears.

She hurt Cullen, she tried to kill him because of a stupid bad dream… a fucking nightmare.

_You kill everything you love._ The nightmare was right about that. She’d gotten Finn killed, she just tried to kill Cullen how in the void could she even consider thinking about Alistair! _Maker_ , She’d only hurt him too.

 

Mira groaned before bringing the bottle back to her lips and taking a few long gulps.

The wind was howling through the Approach, but this little outcrop was sheltered, just like the camp but this was her own private little pity party and she didn’t need some poor recruit losing faith in their Inquisition just because the woman who lead it was an utter mess.

 

 

Her head hurt. She was tried, sore and so - ** _so_** _-_ angry at herself. How could she do that! How could she even think of hurting Cullen…

Maker she couldn’t even think of a way to make this right. This wasn’t one of those things which could be fixed with sex or saucy flirting, things she was good at. She hurt him, she betrayed his trust, she wouldn’t be surprised if he wanted to end things between them. She wasn’t safe… he deserved better.

 

 **

                                                                                                                                                                                

 

“You’ve checked the camp?” Alistair asked, he’d tried to follow the footprints she’d left, but this is a war camp, it’s impossible.

“One watch guard said she saw a hooded figure leave camp heading towards the dune over there. We should check it out. Mira only grabbed her cloak before she ran from the tent.” Cullen was already walking in that direction not waiting for Alistair to catch up.

 

They walked through the dunes until Alistair recognised her tracks, bare feet in sand were pretty easy to notice, even as the sands were swallowing them. The tracks led to the top of a rocky outcrop, with the tracks leading to the side protected from the wind.

Cullen signalled Alistair to come around from the other side in case she tried to escape. He poked his head around the rock and quickly spotted her. Knees pulled up to her chest, arms folded with her head lying on top. There was a bottle sitting half drunken in the sand next to her.

Slowly and quietly he made his way towards her. He saw her twitch at the sound of the sand moving beneath his boots before she even looked up. She froze at the sight of him and he froze unwilling to startle her.

 

“Mira… are you alright?” Cullen asked cautiously, taking a small step forward, when she didn’t flinch at the sound of his voice.

 

She frowned at him, unfazed by his movements but rather by his words. “How can you ask me if I’m alright. I should be asking you that! You should have gone to the infirmary! You should have left me-“

 

“Mira-“

 

“No. I hurt you Cullen, really hurt you. And I am so sorry.” She told him seriously. She couldn’t meet his eyes, she didn’t want to see the disappointment that was surely waiting for her, so she settled for staring at the ground instead.

“Mira, you were having a nightmare, it’s alright I know what that’s like.” Cullen tried to sooth, coming closer until he was crouching just in front of her.

 

“That’s no excuse Cullen, I-“

“Acted on instinct to protect yourself. It’s alright, I understand, I really do.” Cullen cut her off firmly. She looked up at him then, saw the worry in his eyes and realized that all this self-pity was making things worse.

She sighed softly “I’m sorry.” Still all the more in a sorry state.

 

Cullen sighed sitting down next to her, he knew she didn’t believe him and he knew he had to do something.

 

“Did you ever hear about what happened to me at Kinloch Circle?” he began, wondering if she knew the story.

She looked up at him, confused, “Only a little.”

 

“You’ve probably heard that I was the only Templar to survive inside the tower… that’s the story they like to tell.” He sighed, shifting to get comfortable against the rock.

 

“I was hunted through that tower by blood mages and abominations until I was finally caught outside the Harrowing Chamber, I’d thought to kill Uldred myself, to put a stop to the monstrous things he was doing… but demons got to me first.” He sneered at the stupid boy he had been… a stupid boy in an impossible situation.

“The demon trapped me in a magical cage, kept me there for weeks… forcing me to watch, to participate in its little games. The mages joined in, they tried to tempt me with power and sex, tried to make me consent to the demon, it wanted to possess me, to use my body as its toy. When it couldn’t break me in its usual method, it used my memories… stole images of my family, my friends… of people I loved… and it used them to do _Horrible things.”_ he shuddered, even now… after all this time, it was difficult…thinking about it, speaking about it.

“I know _exactly_ how convincing a demon can be, and what you’ll be willing to do because of it.” Cullen finished, watching Mira listen to him intently, even though she still wasn’t quite looking at him.

 

She sniffed, a watery thing, before she started to shake. It took a second for Cullen to realise that she was crying, so quietly, maker she was trying to hard not to. 

Cautiously he moved his hand to hers, unsure if she’d want any contact after all this.

Slowly, when she didn’t flinch from his touch, he pulled her closer to let her hide against his shoulder as he silent crying turned to quiet sobs.

 

“ _I’m so sorry, Maker I’m sorry Cullen.”_ She cried against him as he gently shushed her.

 

“You’re too hard on yourself… you both are.” Alistair spoke, finally rounding the side of the outcrop into view.

Mira stifled her cries quickly, trying to wipe away the tears and make something presentable of herself. _Maker, she bothered Alistair too with this nonsense._

“You brought Alistair to?” she gasped feeling now doubly bad for bothering the Warden.

“He was freaking out; you were freaking out. It was all freaking me out!” Alistair joked, trying to lighten the tension by raising his hands in the air dramatically.

 

“But seriously. You survived, where everyone else would have failed. You survived and now you can keep on helping people, that’s what matters.” He finished as he came to a crouch beside them, using a spare cloth to wipe away her tears.

 

 

They all sat in silence after that, passing the terrible bottle of wine around as they waited for their emotions to calm down. Mira cuddled into Cullen’s side, needing that comfort but at the same time, she couldn’t stop staring at the marks on his neck, as she tried to think of the best salve or potion to make for them.

 

She slowly tried to trace one of the darkening bruises, only to have her hand captured by Cullen’s as he looked at her with a soft smile.

 

“I’m fine Mira, better if you came back to bed with me?” he tried hopefully.

Mira looked up at him in confusion, “You want me to come back with you after all that? Are you sure?” she was hesitant, that much was certain.

Slowly Cullen took her hands into his own. “Of course, I want you to come back with me. I love you Mira, nothing’s changed that.”  He finished by pressing a kiss into each of her palms.

“You are… too good to me Cullen. I’m sorry for hurting you and I’m sorry for making you worry.” She apologised firmly in sincerity but softly in tone… almost as if she couldn’t believe he would forgive her.

 

 

“So, is it bed time yet?” Alistair smiled, in his own reassuring way.

“I think so… I didn’t mean to worry you both.” Mira apologised quickly as Cullen helped her up out of the sand.

“Don’t worry about it, just as long as you’re alright.” Alistair smiled before giving a mock salute and heading back to camp.

 

She nodded softly back as Cullen thanked him once more for helping him look before he lead Mira back to their tent.

 

**

 

 

“Cullen, I’m really sorry.” She told him for what seemed like the hundredth time. Cullen just smiled softly, pressing a kiss to her hair as he gently guided her back into bed.

“I’m fine, nothing that won’t heal.” He promised as he let her trace the hand shaped bruises around his neck.

 

“I’ll make a cream.” She decided, trying to get up again only to have Cullen’s large hand push her back into bed.

“Okay, but in the morning, you, _we_ need to rest.” He told her firmly, climbing into bed after her, blocking her off with the side of the tent and his exhausted body.

 

“But-“

“No but’s, I’m fine Mira… can I hold you?” he asked cautiously, he knew from experience that sometimes all you needed after a nightmare was the warmth of someone… other times it made your skin crawl just to be looked at.

“Yes… please Cullen.” Mira nodded shuffling closer into his arms. Their knees overlapped and tangled together, Mira’s head ducked down, so she could press soft kisses to his neck before coming back to look at him with sad eyes.

 

Cullen’s hand cupped her chin gently to bring her in for a kiss while his other hand rubbed soothing circles with his thumb to her lower back.

“Better?” he asked softly, her eyes were dropping shut as she tried to hold on. The hand cupping her jaw was now running his thumb down behind her ear, that combined with the hand at her back was sending her off to sleep with the constant soothing motion and the warmth of his chest.

 

She hummed once in agreement before she finally slipped off to sleep.

Cullen watched her for a few moments, keeping up the soft motions of his hands, just making sure that she safe, making sure that he could protect her even in her dreams. He pressed one last kiss to her head before he allowed himself to fall asleep. Hands now just holding her safely in his arms.

 

**


	29. Coming home.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The gang returns home to Skyhold. Mira cracks jokes and Cullen gets flustered, while Alistair doesn't know what the hell is going on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So with everything in life, it's a give and take. In last chapter we had to 'take' a bit with some Angst but now i get to 'give'.

Chapter 29 - Coming home.

 

The road back to Skyhold was long filled with was seemed like millions of small issues that required Mira, Cullen and even Alistair to resolve but by the end of it the troops moral was higher than ever. Alistair earned the respect of the Wardens when he allowed the remaining Wardens to choose their own Warden Constable to serve under him and rebuild the Wardens of Orlais while he took a squadron with him to Skyhold. Cullen co-ordinated his troops, leaving many recruits and more experienced soldiers at the Western Keep for training and Mira managed to quell the fears of her troops about recruiting the Wardens after the battle.

 

By the time they’d set up camp and had their evening meal’s both Mira and Cullen were just about ready to collapse into bed. They’d only paused for just long enough to keep up treatment of each other’s wounds, Mira learnt the day after the battle that Cullen had been hit by a pride demon and had bruising all up his side from where he landed, he was lucky he hadn’t broken his leg. Unfortunately, according the healer, the scar on her face was going to be permanent, the tissues around the eye were too delicate to risk more healing magic but she did manage to dull the angry red and lessen the scars intensity if not its length. She also had the scars on her shoulders to add to her collection but each night Cullen kissed them all in turn before they settled down, both pressing against each other for comfort.

 

By the time Skyhold was in view Mira wanted to breathe a sigh of relief! No more walking or riding, no more uncomfortable camp bed. _A proper bath!_ She could even get her burnt hair cut into something respectable! And then sleep… for an entire week! They’d let her do that, right?

 

She turned to look at Cullen riding next to her and smiled, they were both exhausted, riding at the fore to reach the keep with the scouts so Cullen could prepare arrangements for the army and Mira could deal with the global ramifications in the war room with Josephine. But it seemed that there was always some work to do and well, looking at Cullen riding alongside her, perfect hair in place atop a perfectly chiselled face, complete with a slight smear of dirt along his cheek, she couldn’t help but embrace the levity that came to her in that moment.

 

“Cullen?” Mira asked, pushing her horse closer to his as they crossed the bridge into the keep.

“Yes love?”

 

“Do you think Leliana and Josephine would let me sleep for a week? Maybe I could get that fancy dwarven plumbing up in my chambers so I could have a bath whenever I wanted without having to bother anyone? Tiny cakes? Do you think I could have some tiny cakes?!” she giggled getting more and more excited while Cullen was getting more and more confused.

“Mira, sweetheart, darling, love of my life. What are you talking about?” he asked trying to keep up with the conversation.

 

“How I’m going to celebrate our victory, I bet there’s going to be lots of celebrating tonight now that everyone’s home.”

“So, your first ideas on celebrating are to sleep for a week? And tiny cakes?” he smirked, hanging his head to chuckle lightly at the woman he loves.                                                                                              

“What? Well, how were you going to celebrate?” she asks in mock offence. Cullen stalls and stutters before Mira realizes, “You weren’t even going to celebrate, were you?”

 

“I-uh. We could celebrate together? After the War council? Anything you’d like.” He amends quickly, honestly, he was just going to return to business as usual.

“What if I’d like you naked and glistening in oil?” she teased watching the obvious blush colour his face as he spluttered in response.

 

“Mira! We’re in public!” he hissed, looking around cautiously, they were far ahead from the others and no one was within earshot so Mira just laughed in response.

 

“How bout, we go get cleaned up, sort out this War council and then decide hmm? Maker knows I could use a wash.” She sighed, dismounting her horse as the stable hands came out to see to them.

“Well I wasn’t going to say anything-” Cullen joked before Mira slapped his forearm half-heartedly as they stood

“Ass. See you at the council?” she asked as she smiled leaning up for a kiss. Cullen obliged, leaning down with a small smirk, humming in agreement before watching her head off into the keep.

 

Mira trudged her way towards her rooms, stopping quickly in the kitchen to grab a selection of snacks before cook saw, as kind as Amrita was, she would say she was spoiling her appetite. Laden with snacks and having already called for nice hot bath Mira was all ready to settle in for an afternoon relaxing in the bath, with good food and a good book.

The bath was already set up and steaming by the time she entered the room, she quickly pulled over a table to put her assortment of goodies on before heading into the small storage room to hang up her armour and grab a towel.

 

The scented steam permeated her quarters, relaxing her while she undressed and brushed herself off, humming a gentle tune as she turned back into the main room. Her towel dangling over her arm.

 

“Well I certainly wasn’t expecting this.” A voice interrupted her humming, cutting through her relaxation with startling clarity.

 

She screamed, jumping high in surprise as she tried to cover her naked body from her intruder. She reached back blindly for something to defend herself before she finally figured out _who_ had disturbed her.

 

 

“Alistair! You scared the life out of me!” she gasped, clutching the towel to her chest as she figured out what else she grabbed. _A Peach. Some real defensive strategy that was!_

 

 

“I’m ah, sorry. I didn’t expect – I came to see, **ah not _see_ \- **I mean I came to- _oh Andraste’s golden tits. - ­_ Are. You. Okay. Mira.” He finally ground out, after he tore his eyes away from her body, now firmly staring at her feet.

“I’m- fine. What are you- what’s up?” she stumbled through, _maker he was turning red. Worse than Cullen ever does._

 

Alistair was about to fluster through yet another response- honestly, he forgot why he came in here the moment her saw her naked breasts, currently his all his thoughts focused around, _are they soft? Firm? What would it be like to put his face in-between them? Would they be sensitive? Could he-could he-_

The door opened and slammed shut as quick armoured footsteps jogged up the stairs.

“Mira love, I need you to sign off on these papers before we-… Alistair?” Cullen started as he walked into the room, only looking up from his papers when he noticed another pair of boots.

 

 _Maker, if you want to open the floor and swallow be whole, that would be great, thanks._ Alistair thought as he gawked between Cullen and his naked lover.

 

“You know when I gave my consent Mira, I thought you might tell me first.” Cullen frowned, there was a confused pull on his lips though like he was amused by the situation.

“Con-consent?” Alistair choked, glancing between Mira and Cullen in compete confusion.

 

_Floor, you can open up anytime now._

 

“That not what- I was getting changed and Alistair was- I didn’t hear him enter.” Mira flushed, bright red as she tried to re-arrange the towel around her body.

“I knocked, the guard said you were up here, so I just… What were you talking about?” Alistair asked suddenly, turning to Cullen in as much confusion as there was intrigue.

 

“I- uh… Mira?” Cullen fumbled blushing brightly before turning to his lover with eyes screaming _Help?!_

Alistair turned as well, with hesitation on his face… but also hope. _Could they really…_

 

“Let me put a gown on… I’m not doing this standing here naked.” She sighed gesturing for the men to sit down while she strode over to her wardrobe.

Both Alistair and Cullen sat down nervously, waiting for Mira to explain. Alistair felt like a Druffalo was dancing on his chest. _Consent? Does that mean that they…_

 

Mira sighed, tying off the dressing gown before sitting calmly on the table in front of them.

 

“So… how do I start?” she joked with a nervous smile.

 

“What did Cullen mean by consent?” Alistair asked suddenly.  _The Druffalo was doing a four-square dance now!_

 

“It means that he and I discussed the possibility of inviting you to join us in- _um_ \- in bed.”

“Well I, I can’t say that not something I want… but what about you Cullen? Are you sure?”

 

Cullen flushed, “I would like to try, I’ve let many things pass me by in life… I don’t know what will happen after but, you care for her.” he sighed gesturing at Mira, “I think you might even love her, maybe even as much as I love her, and I can’t deny her that. I can’t deny any shred of happiness that we might have, all of us, together.”

 

_There it was, his heart stopping._

 

Alistair gasped for breath, because Cullen had thoroughly stolen it away.

 

“A-and you Mira? What do you want?” he continued, trying desperately to keep his hands from shaking.

 

She smiled, turning her hands palm up, trying to show that she wasn’t hiding anything.

“I want all of us to be happy, I want to love and be loved by both of you. I want to have something that’s just ours, something safe and warm, where we can lose ourselves in each other… in touch and pleasure and-“

 

“Kisses?” Alistair blurted out, before blushing violently and hiding his face.

 

Cullen chuckled, nudging Alistair to look at him. “More than kisses Alistair.” He smirked roguishly, making Alistair almost whimper in want.

 

“But,” Mira began, drawing both boy’s attentions back to her. “Is that something you want Alistair? Would you like to be with us, both of us?”

 

“Yes. Please.” he gasped. Emotion overwhelming him.

 

They wanted him. _Him!_  To join what they have, to love them like they love each other…like they could love him… _They could love him…_

 

Mira smiled in delight, she glanced at Cullen for a moment, her eyes flicking back towards Alistair. He was practically trembling in happiness, she wanted to sooth him, to seal this with a kiss, a touch of comfort.

He nodded, shifting closer to the other man to give his own comfort, as Mira slid to her knees in front of their Warden. Alistair watched her, his breath unsteady, she moved between his knees, bringing her hands to his face and his breath caught.

 

_Me! They want me!_

 

Her lips were on him before he knew what to do. His breath returned on a desperate moan, broken and needy as he kissed his back. Her soft lips sliding open under his, her tongue slipping into his mouth, cautiously, teasingly as her hands slipped into his hair.

He could hear Cullen hum appreciatingly next him before one of his large hands cautiously swept a thumb across his cheek.

Mira pulled back, her eyes heavy with desire as she turned to Cullen, drawing him closer with a crook of her finger.

 

“May I? - I would like to…” he began nervously, his eyes flicking to Alistair lips.

 

Alistair moved without thought, without hesitation. Surging up to Cullen’s lips like a man starved. They met in a clash of lips and teeth, Alistair’s stubble catching on Cullen’s freshly shaven face.

 

They were both thinking, _Maker its more wonderful than I could ever believe,_ in-between the kisses and half caught moans. Mira, determined not to be left out was leaning against Alistair’s chest as she peppered his neck with kisses, occasionally twisting her body towards Cullen to give him the same kisses as well.

 

I was wonderful, magnificent! A heady mix of acceptance, hope, and desire.  And desire was winning out. As Mira was leaning into Alistair, twisting and moving between his legs to get to both men. Rubbing against his cock in a way that was making him loose his mind.

 

*Knock, knock, Knock*

 

“Inquisitor? Lady Josephine sent me for your hair?” Came a female voice through the door.

                                                                                                                                                                                

All three of them froze. Cullen’s lips against Mira’s neck as her tongue was still inside Alistair’s mouth. Cullen broke away first, a breathless laugh already bubbling from his throat as he looked at Mira.

 

“Every bloody time!” he laughed, trying to keep quiet. “I swear, I’m going to make it an official mandate, that if we’re up here. We are not to be disturbed! Ever!”

“This happen to you before?” Alistair chuckled, his hand slowly stroking along Mira’s back.

“We were in bed, four people came in, one after the other. Thank the Maker we were wearing clothes!” she giggled.

“You’re forgetting the time Hawke showed up.” Cullen added with a chuckle.

“That too!”

 

*Knock*

“Inquisitor are you there?” the voice called out again.

 

“Yes! Won’t be a moment.” Mira called out over Alistair’s shoulder, learning more firmly against his cock in the process. He groaned quietly at the contact, eyes slipping closed. Mira twisted again, grinding his cock against her hip, forcing Alistair to hold her still, lest he loose himself.

 

“If you keep that up Inquisitor, you’re not going anywhere.” He growled softly and Cullen caught on to what she was doing.

“Well, we’ll just have to continue this later.” She purred back, leaving both boys with a peck as she stood.

 

“This evening?” Cullen asked, “For dinner?”

Alistair looked to Mira hopefully, his smiling mirroring Cullen’s.

 

“Sounds like a plan to me. Come back here after the meeting, I’ll tell the guards to make sure we’re not disturbed.” Mira whispered teasingly as she stood.

 

“We’ll bring the dinner, you bring the booze.” Cullen smiled softly, before pulling Alistair along with him as the poor man had lost some higher brain function in-between the overwhelming giddiness he was experiencing.

_When was the last time he was even giddy!_

 

She nodded returning Cullen’s smile and kissing them both as they headed down the stairs.

 

Both men straightened themselves up before they left, passing by Josie handmaid without incident, without letting on that three of them were about to enter into this thing, how did she phrase it… _to love and be loved in return_.  


**


	30. It always starts with Dinner. (NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (NSFW) Dinner with the Inquisitor always seems to lead to more.

**Chapter 30 - It always starts with Dinner. (NSFW)**

 

 

Alistair was standing at the bottom of the stairs leading to the Inquisitors tower, roses in hand and stomach fluttering with nerves. The guards let him by like they were expecting him, and to be honest they probably were, Mira had probably done as she said she would…

A night with them and no interruptions…

 

But what if he wasn’t enough. What if he disappointed them! What if they decided that some washed up drunk of a Grey Warden wasn’t worth the trouble…

 

_That’s not like them, and you know it! Stop worrying and seize the opportunity they’re giving you!_

It was funny, even after all these years that little voice in his head, the one that assured him and also scolded him… it still sounded like Wynne.

 

He took a deep breath, calming himself with years of training before straightening his clothes. He wore his best outfit, a clean cream shirt that only been patched once on the arm! A pair of trousers that weren’t filthy from traveling and a warm brown coat, trimmed with white fur and sturdy leather around his shoulders.

_Maybe he should buy some new clothes?_

 

There was a sound close by, stone scraping against stone, before a hidden passageway swung open to reveal Cullen carrying a large tray of food like an expert.

 

“There you are. I thought you’d be up there by now.”

“I was ah, just gathering my wits. Ladies love a good joke, men too! I -uh-well-“

 

“A bit nervous?” Cullen supplied with a soft smile

“Maker, yes.” Alistair finally sighed, fiddling slightly with the roses he found… two different types, one for each of them. _You’re such a sap Alistair!_

 

Cullen just chuckled, trying to set the other man at ease with a smile before guiding him up the stairs.

“Can you get the door? Hands a bit full.” Cullen asked with a small shrug. He could manage, he just wanted to keep Alistair ahead of him, keep guiding him up.

 

Alistair knocked politely and waited. It would be rude to enter a lady’s quarters without being invited!

“Are they for Mira? Good choice, she likes flowers. She braids them in her hair sometimes.” Cullen noted in a thoughtful tone.

“Ah they’re for both of you.”

 

The door opened with Mira standing on the other side. Her hair was shorter than they’d last seen it. Red locks brushing against her shoulders, loosely framing her freckled face. The scar over her eye had lessened, no red to be seen, just the silvery indent of the wound that was once there.

 

She was beautiful, and Alistair felt like a simpleton just looking at her.

“You came!” she said cheerfully, excitedly sweeping Alistair into a hug.

“Oh, and you brought food, good I’m starving! Come on in.” she continued, tugging Alistair into the room joyfully.

 

Alistair watched her closely as she led him up the stairs… honestly, he didn’t have much of a choice, she was wearing this long blue skirt that swished and swayed with every movement of her hips.

 

“Alistair brought us flowers love, and I brought roast pork.” Cullen smiled as he trailed behind the distracted warden.

“I um- yeah, one for each of you. Red because it reminded me of your hair, which looks lovely by the way.” He smiled as he rather smoothly, slid the flower behind her ear.

“And the gold reminded me of your eyes. I uh- hope you like them.” Alistair blushed as he handed Cullen his flower, not being as presumptuous to put it behind his ear.

 

“Thank you, Alistair, they’re really pretty.” Mira smiled leaning in to kiss him, as Cullen set out the food. “But Cullen’s is in the wrong place.” She chuckled sliding next to her other lover, before pinching the flower out of his fingers and sliding it behind his ear so they matched.

 

“Ah, of course! You’re both beautiful.” Alistair smiled, feeling relieved that his gift worked.

Cullen plated everyone dinner while Mira talked to Alistair about the different things she brews.

 

“… Last time we were in the Hinterlands, there was this bush of royal elfroot right at the top of a very steep waterfall, but it was _Royal_ elfroot so naturally I had to get it!” Mira chatted while she sifted through her wine cabinet for a suitable bottle.

“Next thing I knew, I’d slipped on a mossy rock and was careening for the waterfall! Bull had to fish me out, barely got to me in time! But I got that elfroot!” she finished with a laugh.

 

“Bull had to what?!” Came Cullen’s frowning interruption. He hated it when she took unnecessary risks while she was out on missions.

Alistair was barely restraining his laughter because Mira was looking at him with the face of a child caught with their hand in the proverbial cookie jar!

 

“Nothing! Bull and I had a leisurely swim. Well away from any waterfalls!” she turning to flash him a winning smile, hoping that would distract him from her recklessness.

Cullen just rolled his eyes with an exasperated sigh before turning back to the dinner.

 

 

“Wait, I thought you were a pirate? I thought pirates could swim?” Alistair joked, trying to calm himself.

“Truth is, I’m not very good at swimming, I can keep my head above water! But that’s about it. Some village kids in Llomerryn were teaching me… but it was their winter and they didn’t want to get in the water.” She shrugged, picking up two bottles of wine for the evening.

 

 

They ate their dinner with light conversation, Alistair told tales of his and Cullen’s shared time at the abbey, trying to make them both laugh at his stories. The was a subtle air of nervousness around the three. They were all waiting, looking to see who the first person would be to bring _it_ up.

 

 

Alistair continued to fiddle with his fork, licked clean from a delicious meal. His heart was about to beat itself out of his chest! He was spiralling, and he knew it. _Didn’t deserve this, not good enough for them, You’re a drunk Alistair. You’re not even worthy of wearing the Griffon._

 

Cullen noticed Alistair’s nerves first and hoped to distract him, by placing a gentle but firm hand on the other man’s knee to capture his attention.

“Did you enjoy the pork? I heard Grey wardens have a higher appetite because of their abilities, there’s plenty left if you’re still hungry.” He offered eagerly, Maker forbid that they were bad hosts, his mother raised him better than that!

 

“Oh no, I’m alright thank you. _I’d_ _much_ _rather_ _have desert_.” He flirted, _awkwardly_ , towards the pair.

 

_Oh, maker you’re such an idiot. That’s it, they’ll throw you out you bloody lard! First, they throw you out of Ferelden, next the Grey Wardens and now-_

 

Mira laughed, a bright uninhibited thing and soon Cullen followed. Mira set her finished meal down on the table between them as she stood with a sultry look.

“If you wanted _desert_ you should have just asked.” She smirked, pulling up her skirts as she moved to straddle Alistair’s lap.

 

“Ground rules Mira, Ground rules.” Cullen reminded her with a chuckle.

“Ah, crap. You’re right, of course you’re right.” She stalled with a sigh, plopping down next to Alistair instead of on him.

He shot her an encouraging smile, Cullen was right, ground rules were a smart idea.

 

 

“Sooo, I’ve made it no secret that I want you both. But the logistics of this is what I wanted to discuss. I want all of us to be happy and comfortable, we need to respect each other’s boundaries and wishes otherwise this is not going to work. Alright?” she started seriously and both men nodded in response.

 

“Understood, could we just make it a blanket rule that whatever we get up to together, it’s ours, I don’t want any politics or blackmail getting in the way of anything here… But, we should probably let Josephine know at some point, in case word of the Inquisitor being with two men creates backlash from the nobility or worse _starts_ _an Orlesian trend_.” Cullen asked glancing back at both Mira and Alistair.

 

“Agreed, we wouldn’t want all of Thedas to know the Inquisitors ticklish spots.” Alistair added with his humour. Mira gasped in mock outrage.

“I’ll have you know Serah, that I have no ticklish spots!” she shot back with an indignant look and Cullen just smirked back, he knew of several of them.

 

“Of course, dear.” Cullen smiled, “Now I’m sure you have an idea of what you want from us, did you have anything specific you wanted to happen?”

“Mm yeah, I’m curious about that to.” Alistair added taking a long sip of his drink.

 

“Well ideally, I’d like us all together but only if you guys are comfortable, I talked to Cullen about it, but I didn’t ask you, I’m sorry.” There was a slight nervousness to her words as she spoke to Alistair, both men noticed her slight twitch to her movements, like she was waiting for the other shoe to drop.

“I have some experience, being the drunk Grey Warden doesn’t leave you with a lot of morality, but if you don’t mind me saying Cullen, you’re very attractive.” Alistair put in encouragingly, and to think there was a time in his life where he would blush furiously at even the notion of sex, I guess being too drunk to care most nights opens up a lot of pathways.

 

Cullen chuckled softly. “Is there anything that either of you dislike?”

 

At that, Mira slowly raised her hand as a motion to speak which amused both of the boys.

“I uh don’t like being choked or degraded, I’ve had enough of that for one life time and I would appreciate it if you didn’t mention my family or… or Finn… Other than that, I’m yours.” She chuckled trying to end on a positive note.

“Darkspawn and well, Audrey. Oh, and I get nightmares… a lot, so much fun with the taint brigade!”  Alistair joked with a nervous smile.

 

“Is there anything we could do to help?” Mira asked, turning to place her hand fondly against his chest.

“Well, your presence is a great help and I won’t lie, a drink or two makes it quieter.” He let Mira nuzzle into his side, pressing herself in it to comfort him. Mira looked up towards Cullen.

 

“Lyrium, desire demons and Kirkwall. Mira already knows about the withdrawals and I think we all have nightmares, so how abut we look for some positives? I for one am particularly fond that tattoo you have.” Cullen shot her a cheeky grin as he tried to lift the mood of the situation.

 

“You have a tattoo? So do I.” Alistair started with an awed expression.

Mira smirked and moved to stand in front of the two men.

“Would you like to see?” she asked with a flirtatious grin, glancing back towards Cullen, looking for his approval.

“Yes please.” Alistair all but whispered.

 

Mira grinned joyfully as she moved to stand in-between both men, so that they both had a view of the slow strip she was doing. Piece by piece, stitch by stitch the fabric came loose, exposing her pale flesh to both men before she could finally tug the damn shirt over her head, standing there finally dressed in her simple breast band and that long, flowing blue skirt sitting low on her hips. She even did a little spin to flash Alistair her tat and throw a cheeky wink to Cullen.

 

“Maker’s breath you’re beautiful.” Alistair gasped, and Cullen hummed in agreement.

“Would you like to touch?” Mira asked playfully, coming closer to Alistair slowly waiting for his acceptance, which she got with an enthusiastic nod of his head. She smiled and hiked up her skirt to straddled over his legs, hands ghosting over his own shoulders as his own came timidly to rest on her hips.

“Yes.” He whispered leaning in closer trying to angle himself to kiss her, but she stayed just out of reach, a teasing smirk resting on her plump lips.

 

“Cullen?” Mira called out, looking for her other lover as he sat still in his seat with a pleased expression.

“Yes my love?” he replied, enjoying the view of her bared back and admiring how her tattoo shifts and changes with her movements.

 

“Would you like to join us?” she asked with a pleased sigh as Alistair nipped at her collar bone and his hands steadily moved towards her breasts.

“That depends, how much has he had of you?”

 

“We’ve only kissed, if that’s what you’re asking.” Alistair replied over Mira’s shoulder.

“Well in that case, I’m content to watch for now. It really is something to see you with another, to watch him learn you.” Cullen growled, his tone setting Mira’s lust aflame as she quickly leant forwards to capture Alistair’s lips.

 

Soft but calloused, cautious but earnest. Alistair was trying to please her but at the same time not overwhelm her with the sheer force he had displayed the last time they kissed, it was endearing that he still thought she needed coaxing, that she wasn’t already soaking through her small clothes.

 

“Mmm Alistair.” She moaned softly against his lips, her hands now pulling his own slightly shaking ones up the bare skin of her stomach so that they could pull apart her breast band and rest atop her breasts.

 

_Maker’s breath_ she had never seen a better reaction to her breasts in her life!

 

Awed and aroused as Alistair quickly drew his fingers around her nipples. Stroking, tweaking, teasing them into hard buds before he kissed his way down her neck and along the valley of her breasts, pausing for a moment to take in the view before he leant in and took one of those sensitive nipples into his mouth.

Mira let out a pleased gasp as Alistair ran his tongue around her nipple, pressing it against his teeth gently to add to the sensation and Alistair moaned at her reaction. Hands moving, learning each other as Mira tugged off his shirt. Tracing over scars only to follow with lips as the pair of them slowly shifted to sprawl out on the couch, too caught up with touching each other’s skin to notice. She found his own tattoo, a proud griffon over his heart, a symbol of who always was, a Grey Warden. She kissed it all the same, she wanted to know every part of him.

 

As she ran her hand over his griffon, he captured it softly with his, “You are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever met.” He sighed kissing her fingers.

 

Cullen was watching them both, noting and counting the multiple scars that lace his lovers form, things he hadn’t noticed before. There was one, faint but long scar that stretched up across her left shoulder, a puckered mark from an arrow wound and the now healed claw marks from the nightmare. There was even a matching stab mark for a wound he noticed under her rib.

He wanted to kiss them all, love them like he loved her and learn their stories. He could feel himself growing harder, with that constant roll of arousal building in his gut as he watched the pair slowly sink into the couch, Mira taking control over the kiss. She was over him, over Alistair, laying over the small couch so much so that they both had to have one foot on the floor to stop them from falling off.

 

“Perhaps we should move this to the bed before one of you falls off that thing?” Cullen chuckled, his hands going to his coat as he started to head over to the bed and make himself comfortable. His clothing was tight, uncomfortably so and the sight of them both was too alluring to pass up.

“That is actually a brilliant idea.” Mira grinned against Alistair’s lips as she gave another lingering kiss before pushing herself up.

 

Alistair lay there slightly dazed, the taste of her tongue and the ale mixing in his mouth into something addictive, he watched Mira move to unlace her skirt. She was smirking, smug and alluring as the blue fabric slipped off her body with a whisper. She turned slowly to give him an excellent view of her arse, teasingly sliding her smalls down her legs, slipping her feet out one by one, all before looking over her shoulder to her Warden.

He could see her, see all of her. The lines that followed the curve of her spine, that scars that criss-crossed and told her life story… the wetness on her lips, from him, he made her that wet.

 

It was then that Cullen noticed the look in her eyes, the one that she got when she was trying to figure out a way to deliver a line which she found to be hilarious. Smugness and eager excitement all rolled into one package.

“Pork me, Alistair.” She grinned giddily. ‘ _Maker how long had she been sitting on that one! Probably since he’d brought dinner up.’_  Cullen thought with a snicker as he slipped his shirt off and got comfy.

 

The blush that had spread over Alistair’s face was only tempered by a smile and the desire he held in his eyes as he quickly leapt to his feet and somehow, with some weird Warden strength, scooped Mira up and threw her over his shoulder.

 

The laughter that spilled from Mira’s mouth from the surprise and the excitement of being claimed by her gentle Warden brought a smile to both men’s lips. Mira was soon able to right herself though her red hair was bouncing wildly with his quick strides and within a few steps she managed to slide her hands under the band of Alistair’s trousers, so she could grope at his tight ass, muscled, and toned from a lifetime of fighting. Alistair chuckled with amusement and quickly tossed Mira onto the bed where Cullen sat half undressed and waiting for them.

 

 

Alistair paused for a moment, watching her bouncing body as she spread out over the sheets, naked as the day she was brought into the world and more beautiful than the Makers bride. She smiled warmly when she saw Cullen staring at her and quickly drew him down into a kiss.

Soft, new, learning to share but oh so good as Mira moaned into Cullen’s mouth, savouring his taste, his scent as he took advantage of the angle and used that wicked tongue of his to plunder her mouth. Her hand quickly moved to tangle in his hair, pulling him closer as he ravished her, their kiss growing wild with desire.

The pair of them were broken out of their lustful trance by Alistair who had given a staggered and gasping moan. Mira as she was distracted by Cullen’s glorious mouth had shifted on the bed in an effort to get better purchase to kiss her Commander, spreading her naked legs and digging her heels into the mattress to push towards him, this however gave Alistair the most erotic and pleasing view of her.

 

Wet lips, glinting against the candlelight, her desire, her need for them on display and it was drawing Alistair in, like a moth to a flame.

 

“See something you like Alistair?” Cullen chuckled against Mira’s neck, his lips pressing soft kisses and bites into the skin as he absently stroked his free hand down her stomach, he had a rather pleasurable destination in mind.

 

“Would you like to know what she tastes like, how she feels when she comes apart on your tongue? I can assure you, its life changing.” He grinned, feeling a surge of possessiveness over the woman in his arms as he quickly delved his fingers into her wet slick. His fingers, rough from handling a sword but as clever as the man himself quickly sought out her clit, dragging them gently around first as so not to overwhelm her before he started to stroke in frim circles.

 

Alistair moaned again, his head nodding wildly as he moved to crawl in-between her legs.

“Maker’s breath. Mira, can I? I want to, Maker I need to taste you.” Alistair groaned headily, his mouth was already kissing the insides of her knees, waiting for her response but neither men were giving her a second to form coherent thought, though she managed to give a small nod.

 

Their mouths, their tongues. Maker even the scent of them both. Cullen with his gentle scents of Cinnamon and Vanilla and just a hint of sweat from the day’s work, earthy with just a pleasant whiff of sweet while Alistair was deeper, with the smell of ale and sweat but underneath all that there was something there that was hard to describe. Masculine and strong and-

_Ohsweetmaker what is he doing with his tongue!_

 

Alistair’s tongue was to die for, eager and enthusiastic, a right potential contestant for Cullen and his beautifully scarred lip. Alistair grew bolder when Cullen didn’t stop touching her with his fingers, tracing out patterns that Alistair would quickly follow with his tongue and lips, suckling, licking, kissing her to a mindless bliss.

 

“How does she taste Alistair? Good?” Cullen asked, he was using that tone of authority, the one he used with the troops and Maker, it was really, really turning her on right now. Cullen moved his hand, tracing her wetness up her stomach so he could play with her nipples.

“So good, like a fucking goddess.” Alistair moaned, sliding a thick finger into her and slowly fucking her in time with his tongue.

 

“Ah-hah, _yes_.” She moaned, her breath catching in a high gasp as Alistair added another finger, giving her some of that weighted stretch she so desperately wanted. His tongue danced circles on her clit, breaking his ministrations to wrap his lips around the nub and suck gently before returning with his tongue.

 “You hear that Alistair? She’s close. Just a little more and you can taste her, taste her pleasure.” Cullen whispered wickedly, just loud enough for the pair to hear as he moved to suck a mark into the Inquisitors shoulder.

 

There was a high-pitched whine, from Mira or Alistair, the trio couldn’t tell but she was close, the edge of oblivion just dangling off the tip of her tongue… or well his tongue. She started to squirm, the amount of pleasure he was inflicting on her had her unable to control her hips, bucking every so often as if she couldn’t decide if she wanted to run away from his tongue and recover from the intense sensation or chase it and drown in it.

Alistair made her decision for her, his big strong hands clasping over her, one on her hip the other along the swell of her arse as he lifted her into a better angle, his tongue now spearing into her as he rubbed her clit with his thumb. His rhythm was unpredictable, new and exciting and he kept changing it, keeping her on edge, building higher and higher and-

 

“Alistair please.” Mira gasped, her hands grasping at his short hair as she arched, so close with blinding pleasure. A mixture of moans, Mira’s high and whining gasp as pleasure flooded her system, muscles clenching, throbbing as she came onto Alistair’s tongue and both Alistair and Cullen moaning at the sight of her.

Alistair didn’t stop, he could taste her, taste how amazing she was, and the pleasure started to build again, sharp and too soon.

 

“Alistair, it’s ah, too much.” She hissed. Alistair moved instantly, a bashful but pleased smiled crossing his face as he pressed kisses into her stomach as he moved up to her lips.

“Mira, you are mmhm, perfect.” He moaned, catching his breath as he leaned over her, kissing into her neck. Mira turned her head slightly, her hand coming to run her fingers through his hair as her lips found his ear and gave it a gentle teasing nibble.

 

 

Well, the reaction he gave at that was one nobody was expecting!

 

 

Alistair choked moan, surprised at the sensation as his hips bucked along Mira’s wet cunt gasping in pleasure before he groaned, wrapping his arms around her and pressed himself to her tightly as she continued to nibble and suck along his ear and neck.

 

“Maker’s breath Alistair.” Cullen moaned as he leaned down to touch him, tentatively almost shaking with his desire. He’d wasn’t kidding when he said he wasn’t experienced with this, there had been lust filled fumbling as a teenager, boxed in with other recruits during Templar training, nowhere to turn with his new and growing lust but his brothers. Late night trysts when the teenage lust became too much, hands grabbing at each other too hard, their climaxes always too quick and unsatisfying and there was always a hint of guilt and shame afterwards…

Nothing like this.

 

 

Mira shoved Alistair onto his back, he was lost to it, the pleasure she was creating with her mouth. Cullen could see the outline of his cock against his trousers the stain of pre- cum seeping through. Mira’s mouth was doing wicked things to Alistair’s ear, whispering dirty secrets as her tongue flicked and suckled at the sensitive flesh. Cullen watched, just idly stroking the other man’s muscled stomach as her hand moved to tweak one of his nipples. Again, he arched into it, another pained whine leaving his beautiful lips and Cullen couldn’t resist anymore, didn’t want to resist.

He leant down to kiss Alistair’s chest, his hot mouth leaving a trail of pleasure in its wake as he made a trail to his nipple. He licked and sucked as if he was doing it to Mira, applied the same technique that had sent her spiralling and Alistair moaned again, half words and pleas leaving his mouth in staggered gasps.

 

“Please- Ah. I’m going to- Oh maker please.” He begged, hips arching in the air. His still trapped cock twitching against the inside of his trousers seeking friction. Both Mira and Cullen reacted, hands meeting each other over the ties to his trousers as their mouths worked to get him off.

 

Mira’s fingers were faster, years of picking locks had given to other useful abilities, such as undoing men’s pants while Cullen pulled them down with a sharp tug, having to sit up slightly to throw them across the room this allowed Alistair’s cock to spring free. He was hard and leaking, the tip of his cock an angry red and he moaned at his new-found freedom.

Cullen was staring, he knew he was but maker he had never seen such a pretty looking cock. Long and thick, foreskin pulled back to reveal a thick round head which gave way to a beautiful vein which lead down to his sack and neatly managed ginger hair. His hand met Mira’s again and he glanced up to see her beaming face, she was happy so happy it practically resonated out of her.

 

“Together?” she asked linking his hand with hers, they were resting just over Alistair’s needy cock. Alistair looked up at the question, just in time to see Cullen nod and guide both their hands towards his cock.

 

He used their hands, their fingers linked together to form a tight grip, one that he used to encase Alistair’s cock and stroke it with a slow pace before moving his mouth back to his nipples. Alistair was lost, both their hands around his cock, his rough and calloused, hers softer but just as strong, occasionally one of their thumbs would move up to brush over its head, spread the clear leaking fluid around and use it to slicken their grip. And then there was their mouths, maker, Cullen on his nipples, teasing and pulling them into that suckling heat and Mira paying such attention to his ear that it became overwhelming and her breath as she whispered such wonderful things.

 

“Do you like this Alistair? Do you like being under us, feeling the things we do with our mouths and our hands? Because you taste so good, look and sound so good, Maker just watching you like this is making me so wet Alistair.” She moaned just loud enough so Cullen could hear. His eyes flicked up to meet hers again and a wicked thought crossed his mind.

Cullen moved up from the now reddened and over sensitive nipples to nibble on Alistair’s neglected ear lobe, following in Mira’s example to whisper in his ear, listening as he moaned incoherent and loud.

 

“Do you see her Alistair? Do you see what she’s given you? The chance to love her like I love her, are you close? Are you going to be a good boy and show us how much you love us?” he growled heatedly into his ear and Alistair whined and arched desperately in response.

 

“Are you going to be a good boy Alistair? You gonna paint yourself with your come? Go on, show us your love.” Mira purred her fingers spurring a little faster pace while Cullen tightened their grip.

 

“Such a good boy. How’s that Warden stamina working for you Alistair? Does it make it feel better? Draw it out longer? Surely you want to come, you want to be a good boy and show us.” Cullen moaned.

 

 

Alistair couldn’t keep up, he wanted it, he wanted to be good for them. It was overwhelming, their words, their voices, hands, mouths, scents all lustful and loving drowning out the song, drowning out the calling with them. He never wanted to stop, he wanted to stay here in this state for the rest of his life. Safe, loved, their _good boy_.

“Cull- Ah- Mira. Fuck, I want ah- Fuck! Ahh!” he cried out, reaching that blinding peak, he could feel himself pulsing in their grip, spending himself in long ropes of come that splattered up his chest, getting as far as his stubbled chin. Alistair was broken, he could swear he could feel his spirit leaving his body and fucking off to the Fade or wherever else spirits go.

 

 

Both Mira and Cullen worked him through it, listening in both amusement and pleasure at the rambling moans he was making. Mira moved her lips down Alistair’s neck and chest, her tongue flicking out to taste him.

 

 

“Blessed maker and his flaming bloody bride! You two are, _fuck_ , Cullen your voice – those things you said and you Mira! Maker I’m never leaving this bed; you broke me, never moving again.” Alistair groaned shifting the hands he had fisted in the bed sheets to gently touch both of his lovers.

Cullen chuckled at his response, he was ignoring his own arousal for the moment, content to just watch Alistair bask in it and Mira explore his chest.

 

 

“So, good boy huh?” Cullen teased softly, nudging the other man in a boyish move and Alistair just groaned in embarrassment.

“You’re the one who said it.” He moaned covering his face as he flushed red.

“You’re right, we did say it, because you are our good boy and we love you.” Mira smiled, moving his hand away so he could see her. He shook his head with a soft chuckle before leaning up to kiss her.

“I love you to, both of you but just so you know, if either one of you asks me to put on a dress and dance the remigold, I’m drawing the line.” He joked.

 

“Oh, that was you! There was a Senior Mage, Wynne, who told a story of a Warden talking back to his superior when she came back from Ostagar.” Cullen chuckled in realisation.

“You knew Wynne! Of course you did you were in the Ferelden Circle. I haven’t spoken to her in years… I wonder how’s she’s doing.” Alistair beamed.

 

“Ask Leliana, she’d know. She knows everything!” Cullen laughed before locking eyes with Mira who was watching them both with adoration. She hadn’t been entirely sure that they’d accept each other, to be honest she had thought that they wouldn’t accept any of this and to see them both, talking so friendly, even as one of them lay there still panting with his come slowly drying on his stomach! Maker, surely this must be a dream.

 

 

                                                                                                                                                                                

“Budge over ginger, I’ve got a commander that needs seeing to.” Mira giggled as she crawled over Alistair and into Cullen’s arms, ignoring the indignant _Hey_ at the comment as Alistair moved to make space.

“Now Cullen, you’ve been so patient, so lovely. Tell me what you want, anything you want.” Mira smiled, straddling his still clothed hips. Cullen groaned at the contact, it wasn’t like he had been unaffected by watching the other two have their orgasms, he was just patient, Templar training had to come in handy for something!

 

“I uh- well…” he wasn’t used to being asked what he wanted, he usually just tried to please his women and hold on as long as possible, but it wasn’t like he hadn’t thought about it, about her. “Would you get on your knees for me?” he asked gently. “Like how we did it over my desk?” he was almost blushing now just recalling that night.

 

“Oh! Ferelden style?” Mira giggled and kissed him deeply before complying with what he asked.

“I’m sorry, what style?” Alistair chuckled lazily, still catching his breath from what they’d done to him.

“Ferelden style! You know, because it looks like dogs rutting and apparently all Fereldens are barbaric dog lovers.” Mira joked, flipping her flaming red hair over one shoulder and throwing both men a sultry look.

 

 

Cullen scoffed at her assumptions but was once again powerless against her alluring looks as he stood from the bed, his hands shaking with pent up need as he undid the ties to his trousers and tugged them off, the cool air of the bedroom caressed his cock with sweet relief.

He looked down at the sight before him, Mira had her arse raised in the air, her legs spread to show her wet lips as she watched him from over her shoulder, red hair pulled around to keep it out of the way.

Cullen leaned forwards, making a trail of kisses up her spine so he could whisper in her ear, much like they had done to Alistair.

 

 

“Look at you, so strong, so beautiful and so wet for us. Do you want me to fuck you like this? Fuck you from behind as Alistair watches?” he growled into her ear, cock in hand as he stroked the tip of it along the curve of her ass and through her wet lips.

 

 

“Oh I love Fereldens, I want you to give it to me hard Cullen. Fuck me like a barbarian.”  Mira moaned, shifting her hips back so she could grind into him. The pair met for a sloppy and lust filled kiss over her shoulder, it was sloppy and rough, with too much teeth but it was perfect for both of them. Cullen dragged his cock through her wetness, she was wet really wet but he wanted to make sure he didn’t hurt her, if he was going to be rough with her he wanted her soaking.

He kept rubbing his cock along her folds, teasing her before he offered his hand to Alistair moving it close to his mouth.

 

“Suck them, make them wet. I want to fuck her with your saliva covering my cock.” Cullen growled again, rough, possessive. It was the tone he used as _Commander_. Alistair complied eagerly, his own cock hardening again in response as he did his best to soak Cullen’s fingers.

 

“Maker’s breath, so fast? Is that some sort of Warden stamina I’ve heard so much about?” Mira asked watching his cock grow harder under her gaze.

 

“Oh yeah, the Grey wardens double up as excellent brothel workers, don’t you know, and the Joining ceremony is actually an orgy so intense that not everyone survives it.” Alistair laughed as he stroked himself lazily.

“Mmm that sounds – Ah! _Amazing_.” Mira moaned as Cullen who had deemed them both slickened enough pushed into her with a single stroke. She was tight, even tighter in his position and hot too, _oh so hot_.

 

 

“Tell me when you’re ready and promise me you’ll tell me if I hurt you or if you want me to stop. Alright Mira, because once I start I’m going to _fuck you¸_ just like the Ferelden Barbarian I am.” Cullen swore in a low tone that sent shivers up Mira’s spine. He occupied himself by pressing love bites along the curve of her neck, nibbling his way to her ear as she allowed herself to adjust.

It had been awhile for them, they had neither time nor energy when they prepared for Adamant. And Cullen is larger than most men, Alistair too it appeared. Maker, she really knows how to pick them.

“Mm All good my love.” She spoke quietly and braced herself for his promised onslaught.

 

 

Cullen noticed and decided to tease her slightly, pulling out until only the tip of his cock still rested with in her before pushing in at an antagonising slow pace, pressing in so deep that his balls were sitting flush against her before doing it all over again.

 

 

“You sure you’re good Mira? Do you want it harder?” he smirked keeping the pace, holding her hip still as she tried to buck back into him.

“Sweet fucking maker Cullen, please fuck me.” Mira moaned, straining her head back to glare at him, Cullen just chuckled at the eagerness in her voice. He finished pulling out in the same slow fashion, resting there for a second to mentally prepare himself before slamming back into her, using the full force of his weight and size to intensify the action.

 

 

Mira lurched forwards, only saved from smacking her nose on Alistair’s hip bone by Cullen’s grip on her hip, she gasped loudly in surprise before her gasp fell into deep moans as he continued the quick and rough pace. Cullen’s hips snapped into her, fast and brutal as he kept his promise to _Fuck_ her.

Alistair was in front of her, his eyes trailing over her body as he tried to view all her pleasure. It was like Mira could feel his gaze like soft hands caressing his form and the sight of his hard cock, so close yet just out of reach.

 

 

“Are you watching his cock Mira? Are you imagining what it would be like to taste it? To feel it inside you? Would you take us both I wonder, would you take one of us in _here_ while the other pounds your cunt?” Cullen growled, pressing his thumb firmly but gently to that tight pucker of her arse. Mira wailed with pleasure her arms giving out causing her to fall forwards only to be caught by Alistair quick hands as he positioned her to lean on his chest.

“Do you like that Mira? Want to feel us both fucking you, showing you how much we love you? Mmm maybe another night.” Cullen moaned, his breathing had grown ragged and Mira was so close, her walls moving to hold him in tight spasms, so close but she needed just that little bit more.

 

He watched her luscious ass bounce against his hips, smacking together with a wet sound and moans of pleasure that filled the room. _Maker she feels so fucking good,_ he thought to himself, if he kept this us he was going to spill like some green recruit. With a particularly hard thrust Cullen threw his head back on a moan, his eyes screwing shut, teeth digging into his own lip as he focused on his pace. Fucking his goddess for all he was worth.

 

 

Alistair was watching them both, his hand stroking his cock to the glorious sight. Cullen, all taut muscle and firm build, biting his lip in pleasure as he pounded the red headed goddess, who was currently moaning against his chest, her fingers scrabbling for purchase against him.

They were both, so, sooo beautiful and he felt like the luckiest bastard in the whole of Thedas to be right where he was. Watching the mighty Inquisitor get _fucked_ by her ‘ _Barbarian lover’._

 

Alistair’s hand was moving faster on his own cock and Mira was so close, she used whatever strength she had left to slide herself closer.

“Alistair, please! I want to- I want to taste you.” She moaned against his hip, her voice was wreaked, smoky and seductive from the moaning.

 

 

Both men groaned, Cullen’s hips stuttering slightly before returning to his rhythm. Alistair nodded quickly, to starve for touch and the affection she brings with it.

He helped guide her close enough, his hand tangled in her hair and supporting her head, so she could get her mouth on him. It wasn’t as skilled as she was used to but by then both of them were so desperate it didn’t matter. Alistair’s hand kept pumping as Mira took the head of his cock into her mouth, sucking and licking frantically, just enough to drive Alistair wild.

 

 

Knowing that he had to do something for her, in return for the wonderful pleasure she was giving him with her mouth, He took the scared hand that had been resting on his chest and kissed it, Kissed the anchor.

The feeling that he created was so intense, an electric tingle that shot straight though her body sending her hurtling towards release. Cullen noticed what Alistair was doing by how tight she suddenly became and how she shook ever so softly, trembling.

 

 

He opened his eyes to watch, not prepared for the sight of them all.

His cock, glistening with Mira’s juices sliding in and out of her as the most beautiful ass in Thedas bounced and jiggled against his thrusts. The long stretch of her pale and freckled back, her, sucking another Man’s cock… sucking Alistair’s cock as he in turn worshipped her mark, the anchor which he never thought in a million years could elicit this kind of response.

 

They were both so beautiful, sinful, and perfect, but best of all they were both his… just as he was there’s. _His heart won’t let him go back after this._

 

 

Mira cried out around Alistair’s cock, his hips rocking back into his own frantically. Sensing she was nearing her end and knowing that he himself couldn’t hope to hold out much longer, he reached around with the hand that was holding her hip to work his clever fingers into finding her clit.  

 

 

The three of them rose until they couldn’t take it anymore, Mira broke first, the pleasure caught her harder than it had done before, her entire core clamping down hard, a spill of wet slick dripping down Cullen’s still thrusting cock and her thighs, with an electric rolling pleasure that wouldn’t stop. Alistair continued to tongue the mark and Cullen fingered her clit, she was being drawn out like a ball of twine and somewhere far away she could hear herself gasping, crying out to them to never stop.

 

Cullen was wanted to follow her wanted to fill her up, spill his seed. Maker, the feeling of her clenching around him, her cries, _he was losing himself_. He dropped down over her back, holding himself up with one hand as he rutted into her like the barbarian he promised. They were both covered in sweat, hot and sticky and gasping as Cullen licked a bead of it that was running down her neck.

 

“Mira, I’m so, fuck Mira. I’m gonna come, love please.” He moaned into her ear before he let loose this roar as he slammed into the for the final few thrusts, spilling himself into her tight heat, moaning and panting raggedly as he was drained, a pleasing warmth filling his bones as he claimed her, nuzzling into her and listening to Alistair spill himself with a low moan in to Mira’s waiting mouth.

 

 

Exhaustion started to take over Cullen used the last of his strength to lift an almost equally boneless Mira and lay her on the bed in-between them. They were all panting, trying to catch the breath that had been fucked out of them, the stench of sex and sweat lingered heavy in the air.

 

 

 

“That- That was so much better than I expected.” Mira sighed happily, her hair scattered messily on the pillow as she got comfortable. Cullen looked over and noticed that she had a smear of Alistair’s come on her cheek.

“Love you’ve got a bit, there. No, wait just let me get it.” Cullen sighed after a poor attempt at pointing out the smear he gave up and leant in to lick it off.

“Maker’s breath, you two have no right to be that hot.” Alistair moaned when he realised what Cullen was doing.

 

Both Mira and Cullen chuckled at his protest.

 

“So Cullen dear, you were holding out on me before, I had no idea you could be so – soo-“ Mira fumbled for the right words.

 

“Commanding and uh sinfully hot?” Alistair added helpfully as he grabbed his own part of the pillow and pulled Mira just a little bit closer so they all had some space on the bed.

 

“Oh, I knew he was hot,” she smiled pressing a leg in-between Alistair’s and ran her hand over his arm. “But the commanding part, maker that is very, very hot but I do like it when you’re soft to. I guess I just love all of you. And you Alistair.” She smiled leaning over to kiss them both in turn.

 

“Are you alright love? Didn’t hurt you?” Cullen asked lying on his back as he absently ran his fingers over Mira’s hip, trying to sooth the bruises he knew were going to appear in the morning.

“I’m better than alright, thank you. But are you okay?” she smiled, turning slightly to watch his response.

“I think I might have pushed myself a bit farther than I anticipated but I should be fine in the morning. It was worth it though to feel you come that hard.” He smiled lazily, scratching his groin where her wet come had dried on his heated skin.

“I’ll bet, you didn’t see her face, maker she looked magnificent!” Alistair added leaning over to plant a sloppy kiss on Mira’s shoulder.

 

“You two are impossible.” Mira groaned with no heat behind that insult.

“No you’re just gorgeous.” Alistair grinned flopping his head down on the pillow.

 

“He’s right about that. Such a good boy Alistair.” Cullen teased, his face spreading into a wide grin at Alistair’s embarrassed groan.

“You’re not going to let that go are you?”

“No probably not, it was, _really_ hot.” He replied moving to brush his fingers over Alistair’s knuckles reassuringly. “But if you want me to stop, just say so.”

 

Cullen glanced down to look at Mira who was slowly drifting off to sleep between them, her eye’s drooped closed but there was a smile on her face as she listened to her boy’s tease each other. Their wonderful woman made this possible and what was better yet, now that they had been together, he didn’t regret it. There was no suffocating layer of regret that he had come to associate with debauched desires but there was warmth, pleasure, the security in knowing that they all wanted this, wanted each other.

 

“She really is amazing isn’t she?” Alistair spoke quietly, he could feel her breathing slow as she drifted off.

“That she is, I- well I guess now, _we,_ are so lucky to have her.” Cullen whispered back.

 

“Thank you for, well for letting me in. I know the two of you had something before I showed up and I didn’t want to get in the way. This is so much more than I deserve but you’ve made me feel… Maker, just… _thank you_.” Alistair told him with a blush on his cheeks, something that Cullen found suddenly attractive, he guessed that’s why Mira always tried to make him blush.

“If we’re being perfectly honest, I don’t think I would have done any of this if it wasn’t for her… but I’m so glad I did, Alistair you are… beautiful.” Cullen blushed, surprising even himself with his confession. That was when he felt Mira’s soft hand slide over his hip and he thought that she wasn’t quite as asleep as she seemed.

 

“I well. Wow, I’m just going to stay over here until the blushing stops.” Alistair smiled, almost hiding his face behind Mira, he was warmed through by Cullen’s words. The elation he felt from being accepted now inflated tenfold at the thought that they could grow to love each other as well.

This really was the best thing that could have happened to any of them and it was all because of the beautiful woman who now slept between them.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay, Smut is always hard to write and when there's three people, it's an even bigger challenge!


	31. Morning after, Together. (NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More time spent together, between our three.

 Morning After Together.

 

Mira awoke in a haze of warmth, cocooned in blankets and firm bodies as she stretched against one of her boys. She ached but in a good way, Cullen had been the roughest he’d ever been with her and she had the bruises along her hips to prove it, but also the memory of the intense pleasure they brought her. Cullen’s cock… Alistair’s mouth and the taste of him on her tongue…

 

“Morning love.” Came Cullen’s deep grumble as he pressed a kiss to her forehead.  Slowly she cracked one eye open only to find him sitting next to her lazily as he read through some reports.

“It’ss not morning yet.” She slurred, still hazy and warm within what she now realized was Alistair’s arms.

 

“Mmm, you’re right. It’s almost noon.” Alistair chuckled from behind her, his big hands absently stroking her belly fondly.

“Isss not.” She groaned, rolling over to let her back pop before she nuzzled back into Alistair’s chest, using him to block out the light.

 

 

“I take it she’s not a morning person.” Alistair chuckled, hands still tracing and touching her fondly.

“Our dear Inquisitor is many things, a morning person, she is not.” Cullen laughed back, she could hear the smirk in his voice, along with the shuffle of papers and bed sheets as he slid down behind her.

“Luckily, I know the best way to, gain her attention.” He chuckled pressing his hips against her teasingly. He was soft as he rocked against her, but she could feel him slowly hardening.

 

 

Mira gave an interested hum, popping open one eye, marred by the scar, to see what was going on as she pushed her hips back, making it easier for Cullen to hump against her.

Alistair smiled as Mira’s gaze fell onto him. She was sleepy, he could see it as plain as day, but she was interested as he leaned in to kiss her. She moaned against him, curious fingers coming up to grip his muscular shoulder as his wandering hands grew bolder.

They were touching her, teasing, fleeting touches that left her gasping. With a low groan Alistair leaned down to lay a trail of kisses down her neck towards her breasts. With suckling kisses and salacious tricks with his tongue, he happily buried his face between his tits, moaning gently at the feeling.

 

“I think he likes them.” she gasped as Alistair sucked one of her nipples into his mouth, causing that electric pull that only made her wetter.

 

Cullen slid one of his hands around over her hip to reach the other man, sliding it up his thigh until he found what he was looking for. Alistair’s cock, hard and leaking, barely a hairs breath away from rubbing against Mira’s thigh. His own cock twitched in interest against Mira’s ass as he stroked the other man in a firm grip, making sure to stroke the head of his cock against Mira’s skin.

Alistair gasped against her skin, hips thrusting forwards into Cullen’s grip as Cullen thrust Mira forwards from behind. They were all pressed up, close together as Mira managed to slide Alistair’s thigh between her legs, giving her something to grind against.

 

“Cullen?” she panted, now thoroughly aroused as she held Alistair’s head to her bosom, “Cullen, there’s oil in the draw behind you. Would you- do you want to? ah-“ she gasped suddenly distracted as Alistair’s clever fingers found her sopping and wet against his thigh.

“Yes, Yes and yes.” Cullen replied, leaning over to plant an excited kiss on her cheek as he rolled off to retrieve the oil, tugging away the blankets at the same time.

 

“You want us to? Together?” Alistair asked in a breathy voice. She was wide awake now, witnessing the glory that Alistair first thing in the morning. His hair ruffled and sticking up at odd angles, stubble just barely starting to show and a look in his eyes that made Mira melt from the inside out.

 

“Cullen put the idea in my head last night and now, now I really want it.” She smiled, kissing him softly.

“Have you done it before? Because It can hur- mmff.” He started cautiously before she kissed him again with a smile, pushing him backwards so she could straddle over him leaning over to make it easier for Cullen to ready her.

“I’ll be fine, it’s not like this is my first time.” She chuckled leaning back on his thighs to stretch out.

 

“No, but it’s mine.” Cullen piped up from the side of the bed. He was perched there with a nervous but determined look.

Mira turned to look in surprise, but quickly smiled at him, drawing him closer to her with her easy charm. _Of course he wants to, he’s been staring at my ass for days._

“Alright, key is to go slow and use lots of oil.” She told him clearly as she slipped the bottle of oil out of his hands and popped open the lid.

 

She coated his fingers with the oil, using his hand as he as she started to show him what to do. Slowly he started rubbing firm circles over her pucker, gradually apply more pressure until the tip of his finger slid into the first ring of muscle.

“Just keep doing it like that, slowly, just keep adding the- _the fuck-_ oil _.”_ She gasped just at the same moment Alistair nuzzled against her breasts again.

 

The wonderful man underneath was thoroughly distracting her as he worshiped her breasts. She gasped and giggled, slowly rocking against Cullen’s fingers and back along the length of Alistair’s cock.

 

“Add another finger.” She panted to Cullen, propping herself up on one hand so she could stroke Alistair’s throbbing cock, instead of grind against it.

He gasped, breaking his concentration from her breasts as he turned to look at her. Eyes half lidded and blown with lust. She couldn’t help herself, she had to kiss him, their lips crashing together in a surge of desire, as neither one could hold back.                                    

The kissing turned into gasps and nips as both of them lost their senses.

 

“C-Cullen now, please. I’m ready.” She panted, lowering herself to nuzzle into Alistair’s neck and raise her ass into a more inviting position.

 

Cullen couldn’t help but stare, his fingers still teasing her tight pucker wider still. He felt decedent, sinful… and utterly glorious. The woman he loves, and trusts was offering this to him, this pleasure that he’d only heard bawdy whispers about.

He oiled himself up, making sure his cock was dripping with it before he moved forwards. He watched as his fingers slid out of her reddened hole, marvelling in the way it moved as he used them to push the head of his cock against the ring of muscle.

The head of his cock breached through in what felt like a pop of suction as the oil slickened his way deeper.

 

“Dear sweet maker, you’re big.” She gasped through gritted teeth, Alistair snickered underneath her. She forced herself still to get accustomed to the sensation again. It had been a long while since she’d done this… it wasn’t one of her _Captors_ preferred methods… but they did do it on occasion.

“Would this make it feel better?” Alistair asked slowly as his fingers found her clit and started to rub firm but slow circles on it.

“Yesss.” Came her returned hiss.

 

They stayed like that for a while, Alistair had been so focused on making sure Mira was alright that he almost missed the expression Cullen was making.

Head thrown back, eyes screwed shut and lips parted to suck down air. He was trying so hard not to lose himself, being in her like this was like nothing he’d ever experienced before. Hot and impossibly tight, even with only the head of his cock inside her.

 

Suddenly Mira started to move, to rock back against him. Breaking his intense concentration as he gasped out in surprise.

“Andraste’s flaming sword, _you’re so tight!_ ” he cried, moaning and hissing, as she rocked herself further down his cock.

 

“I think we’ve already established how tight she is.” Alistair chucked, still rubbing circles around her clit distractingly.

“Still think she’ll fit both of us inside her?” he continued with a growl, nipping at her neck playfully.

 

“I want it! I want you both inside me, I want you to fill me up, I want you to use me, claim me… I want to be dripping with your seed!” she cried out, thrusting back sharply so that Cullen had no choice but to thrust completely into her.

 

They both cried out at her unexpected move, the forced stretch of her pucker around his thick cock. She started to move quickly after that, small little rocking motions to try and grow comfortable with the stretch and pull, while Alistair’s fingers underneath kept moving with her rubbing her clit to distraction.

 

She was teetering over the edge, fighting between the overwhelming sensation of Cullen filling her so thickly from behind, and Alistair in front of her with slender but rough fingers and a mouth that keep kissing and sucking on every bit of skin he could reach.

Words were lost to her now, she was lost, balancing on the knifes edge of pleasure and pain, only able to let out these song like gasps, _her sirens call as Cullen liked to call it._

 

“You’re close, aren’t you?” Cullen growled, trying to focus on rocking into her in this slow and steady pace.

She gasped, a high-pitched moan in reply, _Yes close._ Is what it meant, and Cullen knew, he also knew she’d want more… she always wanted more.

“Do you want to come with _both_ of us inside you?” he continued, grinning roguishly at Alistair as before he’d even finished his sentence she was already nodding wildly.

 

“Yes! Please, please, oh fucking maker please-“ she was cut off by a pair of lips smashing into hers. Alistair couldn’t help himself! She wanted him, both of them, inside her, _HER! the bloody Inquisitor!_

He could hear Cullen’s ragged moan in the distance as he lined himself up, pulling Mira’s hips into a better position over him, and by extension, Cullen too. 

 

“Ready?” Alistair asked softly, the head of his cock just resting against her dripping folds.

“ _Yes!_ ” she purred for him in that alluring tone of hers, her Sirens Song.

 

Alistair slid in slowly, trying to savour the moment… Mira Trevelyan, above him, sinking onto his cock… with the press of Cullen’s cock sliding along within her. He moaned deeply, this feeling, belonging to them both, being connected in a way that transcends simple words… into this.

 

Alistair leaned up to kiss them, first he leaned over her shoulder to lay a tender kiss to Cullen’s lips. The other man was surprised but quickly melted to the touch, kissing back with added affection, breaking the kiss with a small nip to his lips, _a ‘love bite’_ if you will. He moved to Mira next, angling her face towards his so he could see the look in her eyes, to see if this meant as much to her as it did to him.

 

What he found was a woman lost in pleasure, her eyes glazed, and pupils dilated, it took her a few seconds to realize what he was doing but when she did, she smiled. A pure smile, honest and true, she was happy, loved. He stroked her cheek, cupping it as he leaned in to kiss her.

 

She was so soft, lips tracing over his own as she tried so hard to breathe him in, to consume him, mind, body and soul. Their lips locked together, her tongue sweeping into his mouth as if it belonged there… as if he was a part of her ‘Home’… just like she was quickly becoming his home.

 

Cullen moved first, too desperate to hold off any longer as Alistair moved in counter rhythm, his fingers working over Mira’s clit, determined to turn her into a pile of jelly before days end.

Her moans were as beautiful as bird song, but they belonged to her, husky and delightful.

“Yes, _Yes!_ Oh mak- Cullen! _Alistair, Please!”_ She called to them both, working with their thrusts which worked in sync with each other, a continuous motion to keep her building. Occasionally they’d lose rhythm, thrust into her together and knock the air from her lungs in a beautiful gasp.

 

“Fuck- Fuck I’m not going to last.” Cullen groaned, pressing his forehead to her shoulder, halting his thrusts to catch his breath.

They were all hot, covered in sweat and close to the edge when Alistair had the idea.

 

With a firm grip on Cullen’s flank he pulled him deep into Mira while at the same time catching his attention. “Hold her steady.” He panted leaning them more upright.

 

There are many interesting things about being a Warden, many terrible things, such as an early death but then there were great things too… like the stamina.

While Mira was busy catching her breath, he guided Cullen’s hand around to her clit, “Hold Steady, and make her come Cullen.” He ordered from beneath them. Cullen nodded as Alistair got his leverage, holding one hand over her hip, keeping her flushed against him, while the other hand started rubbing quick circles over her clit.

 

Alistair smirked when Mira moaned at Cullen’s manipulations, spreading her legs slightly wider before he acted. Using all the strength and stamina of a grey warden he fucked Mira with all his worth.

They were greeted with the most beautiful gasping scream as Mira writhed against Cullen’s chest, clutching for some stability as Alistair pounded her from below. Their Warden, their wonderful Warden was simultaneously bringing both Mira and Cullen unspeakable pleasure, with Cullen’s cock being milked by Mira, while she steadily raced towards a mind melting orgasm.

 

And Mira was melting, her voice reaching a pitch neither man had heard before as she lost herself over their cocks, hips trying to move with him in sharp jerky movements. Cullen clung to her, holding her flush to his chest as they both felt Alistair fuck her, with his own moans resonating in her ear as their cries echoed around the room.

 

Her fingers clawed over Alistair’s forearms and fisted into Cullen’s hair, as the sound of her thighs slapping against Alistair’s hips threatened to drown out her screams.

 

“ _I-I Can’t! Please, Please-”_ she pleaded mindlessly, so close to the brink, so lost to the pleasure they were bringing her. Cullen’s fingers quickened against her clit while Alistair thrust into her harder and faster.

“ _Please, Please, I-I Oh- AHH!”_ She screamed, her whole-body arching in pleasure, every single muscle strained and tightened, from her toes curled against the sheet, to her fingers holding onto both men, and even with her cunt clenched tight around both of their cocks.

 

She was in heaven, bliss and blood rushing to her head as she screamed their names. Her body felt like it had been electrified and she was now melting away, kept safe within Cullen’s arms and Alistair’s hands. Her thighs were wet, her lungs struggling to return the air she screamed out of them and she was shaking, so overcome by pleasure that she didn’t know how she was still upright.

 

Alistair rested for a moment, still inside her, cock hard and twitching, while Cullen nuzzled into her neck, laying soothing kisses to her skin as he breathed heavily against her. Alistair’s hands slowly slid over her own, while Cullen adjusted himself behind her.

She opened her eyes, only barely having the presence of mind to register what they were doing as they re-adjusted her into their grasp.

 

“You didn’t think we were done with you, did you love?” Cullen smirked against her ear as Alistair’s own devilish grin turned up to greet her.

 

Slower this time, both men began to thrust back inside her.

“Oh, we’re not done with you yet, sweetheart.” Alistair growled, his hands sliding up her chest to pinch her nipples gently.

 

Mira was lost, caught between the motions of two powerful men. The two men who loved her, who brought her to unimaginable pleasure. She fell forwards onto her shaking arms, rolling into both of their movements as she propped herself up on one arm. She let herself drift for a moment, working through the last shaky shocks of her orgasm before sanity returned to her.

 

Devilishly, she levelled Alistair with a look of pure lust as she flipped her shorter red hair off her face, she was still flushed, lost in the pleasure, but the spark that always lingered in her eyes was back, and this time aimed at him.

 

“You two are evil,” she rasped turning to give Cullen the look too, “fucking me, to within an inch of my- _Ah-“_ she was interrupted by Alistair’s lips nibbling at her neck.

 

“I know what you want,” she purred, the tone sent shivers down both men’s spines. “You want to see me fat, filled with your - _with your ah-_ seed, all swollen and claimed-” her voice pitched again in-between the heavy breathing and uncoordinated fucking.

Cullen growled heatedly, the way her voice dropped into something sinful like that, _did things to him_ , things that made him throw all sense out the window. His thrusts sped up, his hips steadily slapping against her arse, as he wanted to make her words a reality, he wanted to cover her with his come. _Mark her as his._

 

 

Alistair on the other hand was watching, his skills would let him hold back for only little while longer. Long enough to watch, enraptured as Cullen lost his tightly held control.

 

“You’re the evil one, saying things like that,” Alistair chuckled, he’d figured out that the pair liked their dirty talk and boy was he going to provide.

“Look at what you’ve done to us, _done to him_. Can you feel him? Losing control,” he growled, scraping his teeth along her neck, “It’s you. It’s what you do to us, can you blame us if we want to claim you?” he paused to kiss her again while he glanced at Cullen, all red faced and on the brink.

 

She gasped at his words, not expecting Alistair of _all people_ to be capable of such talk.

 

“Can you imagine what she’d look like Cullen? All swollen with your seed? Too fat with it to leave the bed, only wanting to be filled again and again.” Alistair growled, resuming his hard thrusts into her.

 

“ _Yes_. Marked, claimed. _Yours_. Only yours!” she cried out between them.

 

Cullen’s fingers tightened around her hips, skin turning white in his grip. He pulled her along his cock, forcing her arse to meet his hips as his balls slapped loudly against her skin. Maker it was divine, _she_ _is_ _divine!_

 

“B-Beautiful, you’d be beautiful.” Cullen gritted out before a whine left his throat, signalling his mindless desire, his need.

“I can’t, I need to- I’m going to-“ he growled, slamming his cock into her in one, two, three, strong thrusts before a howling roar rose from his throat. He pressed his cock as far in as he could manage, wanting to fill her up with every drop of his seed.

 

Alistair was watching them both, too lost to tame the words leaving his lips.

“Fuck, can you feel him Mira? Can you feel him fill you up? Maker you’re so beautiful, I want, Maker I want to make you come, you are so beautiful when you do- I want- _ah-“_  He could feel it, the beginning of the end.

His legendary Warden stamina was almost gone and she, she was on the brink of another orgasm, after teasing her for so long. She was beautiful, enthralling, he was lost to her, body and soul, a part of him that would always belong to her until the day he died.

 

He was lost in his thoughts, his steady pounding thrusts into her, that he barely heard her words.

“Come inside me Alistair, please, fill me up. I want to be filled, claimed – I want to come!” she moaned, barely holding herself up as she pressed her face against the crook of his neck.

 

A hand slipped around Mira’s waist, while another cupped her breast. Not Alistair’s, they were hold her waist, guiding her hips to meet his cock.

 

_Cullen’s hands._

 

His strong fingers found her clit and circled it with just the right amount of firmness, giving her that needed bit of stimulation to drive her mad with need. His other hand teased her breast in the way he knew she liked, finger tweaking and teasing and brushing against her nipple.

 

 

“I bet you’re close, aren’t you love?” Cullen’s voice growled out, still breathless from his own orgasm.

 

She whined in reply, Alistair giving every last bit of strength to their final few thrusts, _So close, just a little more._

 

“Come on for us love, come on his cock- Come on Mira, show us how beautiful you are, show us-“

 

“Fuck, _fuck, FUCK!”_ came Mira’s howling scream, her back arched like a lightning strike, as she clenched every muscle in her body while Alistair’s cock, electrified her orgasm. She was gone, lost to them. Pleasure building upon pleasure until she knew nothing else.

 

“Now be a _good boy_ Alistair and come inside her.” Cullen ordered breathlessly, while Mira’s moans still rang through the air.

 

“Yes, Yes- _Ah!!-_ “ he cried out, slamming his cock into her to make her scream in pleasure. A short flash of pain, caused Alistair to lose himself, cock slamming into her as he filled her with his hot seed. Mira’s head had dropped to his neck, her teeth sinking into his skin with the singular thought to _claim_ what was hers.

_He was hers_. __  
  


It was the last thought that flew through his head before all others were whipped away in pleasure.

 

_Hers… Thiers._

 

 

 

She was trembling against Alistair’s chest, it was overwhelming, her mind blank, free from everything apart from the beat of her racing heart.  Cullen sat back on his heels, slowly pulling his cock from her, panting harshly when he saw the mess they’d made of her.

 

Their seed dripping from her body, sliding with each tremble she made, right down to Alistair’s cock, which was softening inside her.

 

“Sweet Maker, look at you.” Cullen gasped, captivated by the sight of them.

Mira just gasped, a small whimpering thing, still too overstimulated to form actual words as she clung to Alistair’s chest.

 

Alistair noticed it first, it has happened to him a few times when he started engaging in sexual acts. He let her hide against his neck, happy to just be there to comfort her as he rubbed soft circles into her back.

 

“You were so good, thank you for sharing that with us, thank you for letting me be here.” Alistair whispered his praises in a soothing tone as she slowly started to come back.

 

“Mira love, are you alright?” Cullen asked, he hadn’t seen her react like this before, he wasn’t quite sure what was going on.

“Just a bit- sec- min- ah.” She muttered, still boneless against Alistair.

“Want me to clean you up?” he asked softly, as he pressed kisses along her back. She just hummed in response as he got up to fetch a warm cloth.

 

“Feeling better?” Alistair hummed as he pressed kisses against Mira’s cheek.

“Mmm, Yes. Feeling amazing, just sensitive.” She purred back, slowly leaning up and to let Alistair’s cock slip out of her and the rush of fluid to run down her thighs. Alistair caught the sight of it, their seed sliding down her thighs, not just his and hers but Cullen’s to. _Oh, sweet maker is right, she looks positively sinful._

                                                                                                                                                                                

“Hold on, let me get that before you stain the sheets.” Cullen muttered, holding her hips steady before she could flop down onto the bed.

The cloth was warm and wet when it dragged against her folds. She gasped, rocketing upwards and away from the sudden sensation.

 

“Sensitive.” She muttered, before slowly lowering herself back down to Cullen’s hand. He cleaned away their seed as gently as he could while Alistair below them just used the corner of the bed sheet to clean himself up.

“Oh, so he gets to clean himself with the bedsheet.” Mira groaned, finally flopping down to the bed once Cullen had finished.

 

“Glad to see you back with us, I was getting worried we broke you.” Alistair chuckled pulling her tired body towards him, so he could hold her in his arms.

“You nearly did, I’d forgotten how overwhelming that could be. And your voice! Maker I never knew someone so sweet could say such things!” She laughed nuzzling against him before tucking her foot around Cullen’s thigh in an attempt to pull him into the cuddle.

 

“Honestly, I don’t know what came over me.” Alistair blushed, hiding his face by pressing kisses against her neck.

“I think we did, _multiple times_.” Mira smirked, which caused Cullen to let out a surprised bawdy laugh as he settled behind her.

 

“We didn’t hurt you, did we? Do you need a poultice? Potion? Long bath?” Cullen asked with a soft smile, stroking her cheek worriedly. He’d never seen her overstimulated before and he wanted to make sure she was alright.

 

“Two sweet Fereldens in my bed would be nice.” She teased wondering if he would remember. He just chuckled, kissing her softly, it was the same thing she said after the first time they had sex, plus one more Ferelden.

Alistair looked over her shoulder in a bit of confusion, there was a joke there he didn’t quite get. Cullen reached out to find the other man’s hand, linking their fingers together to reassure him.

“She’s fine. Are you free to stay for a bit?” he asked, catching Alistair’s eye.

 

“Oh, I don’t know, I’ve got such a busy schedule planned, what with all the sleeping with two wonderful people and having mind blowing sex.” Alistair rambled cheekily, teasing the other two, before Mira turned over in his arms and latched onto him with her arms and legs.

“Nope, not going anywhere. Inquisitors orders.” She ordered playfully, even though her appearance right now was about as far form Inquisitorial as she could get.

 

“Oh, Inquisitors orders is it now? May I remind you that-“ Alistair began but was swiftly interrupted by both Mira and Cullen’s mocking tone.

“ _Wardens operate outside of standard military conventions.”_ The pair teased.

 

“But the Inquisition isn’t technically a Military organisation.” Cullen smirked.

“And last I checked, you pledged yourself to me and my Inquisition.”  Mira continued, both of them watching the amused expression form on Alistair’s face.

“You just wanted into the Inquisitors pants, didn’t you?” Cullen mocked, barely able to keep his smirking in check.

“Sneaky pant thief.” Mira jabbed, doing her best mocking glare while leaning back to high-five Cullen.

 

“Alright! Alright I give!” Alistair laughed, “I’m no match for your combined wit!”

“Such a good boy.” Mira giggled, leaning into press light hearted kissed against Alistair’s cheeks.

“You’re not letting that one go, are you?” He laughed, even when Cullen leaned over to smack kisses against his forehead now.

“Nope.” She chirped cheerfully.

“And we’re not letting you go.”

 

“Honestly at this point I don’t think you’re getting rid of me. You’d probably have to throw me out, you will, not Cullen, I think I’m too big for him.” Alistair yawned, watching them both through lazy eyes.

 

Mira snickered, the sound steadily growing into full blown laughter as she amused herself.

 

“What?” Cullen frowned, confused to her sudden giggles.

“I guess we don’t need that cock measuring contest now!” she laughed, thoroughly amused by her own joke.

 

“Oh Maker. You’re terrible.” Cullen groaned rubbing his neck to fight off embarrassment.

“We could measure right now if you wanted?” Alistair smirked.

“I’d say you’d have an unfair advantage with your sexy-Warden- skills.” Mira added teasingly.

 

 “I’d say you have some skills of your own, dear.”

 

“Cullen, if you’re talking about my blowjob skills, _all you had to do was ask-_ But after a bath, we’re all sweaty and oily and I’m covered in your- well, both of your cum.”  She groaned, stretching in a bid to get up.

Cullen gawped at her teasing accusation, barely able to make a sound before she pipped up again.

 

“Oh hey, we could do the Cock measuring contest through blowjobs! See how far I can get each of you down my throat!” she chirped, standing up on wobbly legs.

 

 

“ _Sweet blood of Andraste_ , Mira you can’t say things like that! You’ll give Cullen a heart attack!” Alistair gasped, face beet red as he deflected to Cullen… who was also blushing terribly.

“ME?! Y-You! You bloody Tomato!” Cullen stammered, obviously being reduced to the mentality of a twelve-year-old.

 

Suddenly there was a ungodly cackle- which sounded like a startled bird- coming from Mira’s mouth as she was apparently laughing, _Hysterically_!

 

“Chantry boys! The two of you are perfect.” She cackled rather ‘elegantly’ as she sent the signal, calling her maids for food and a hot bath.

 

 

“ _Minx_ , whatever are we going to do with you?” Cullen sighed fondly, from his lazy position on the bed. His hair was a mess, he looked _thoroughly fucked_ and well- loved, and loving in return.

“Oh, I can think of a few things.” Alistair added and although there was heat to his words, there was sweetness as well, a familiarity and kindness that assured her that they’d be alright.

 

She watched them idly discuss the things they could do with her, most of them being very sexy and tempting things, but some of them were sweet. Like Cullen was telling Alistair about her mouse-like sleeping habits, while the pair were already planning their future sleeping arrangements… apparently, she needed a bigger bed.

 

She smiled, watching them chatter away happily, slowly realizing the feeling that was gradually washing over her. She felt a warmth, a sweet joy that overwhelmed any of the lingering nerves she had about this new arrangement.

She was happy, happier than she ever dreamed possible. _Maker_ she thought the same thing when Cullen told her he loved her… but this?

 

This is everything.

 

This is her home.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long gaps between updates, I'm wrestling with the next couple of chapters (Which aren't cooperating with me) and life's being pretty rubbish and busy at the mo. Hopefully I can get back into the swing of things, but please bear with me, I love this fic to much to ever abandon it.


End file.
